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Use our Travel forum for recommendations on everything from day trips to the best family-friendly holiday destinations.

Break with bored 16 DS, help!

57 replies

Escapetosomewhere · 06/02/2024 09:44

I feel like I should take DS 16 somewhere at half term as he seems bored and has found school miserable. trouble is, I’ve totally lost confidence! We can afford a cheaply to Copenhagen possibly. I’m not sure he’ll want to traipse around a rainy city with his mum. He’s not sure what he’s interested in. Well he likes space and science not art galleries.
DH says he’ll be fine at home. He’s got new electronic gizmos to invent stuff with.
DH also can’t go, work, and doesn’t want to go away with just the three of us in the uk as it will remind him of DD who has gone no contact. Also he says even a cheaply trip will end up being a grand.
I just find it so hard to arrange a break. What do I do?
DS did say can we go away, but I don’t know where. It all looks so bleak or expensive and I’ve just lost confidence. Don’t want to drag DS to airport etc etc if it’s going to be wet and cold and miserable few days. Also planning stuff to do when we get there is terrifying - I’m bound to miss the cool stuff.
help!

OP posts:
ScribblingPixie · 07/02/2024 09:11

If no one's already mentioned it, Valencia has a science museum and a very easygoing atmosphere. Nice weather in Feb and you can get a bus to the beach for paella lunch.

flipflopfly · 07/02/2024 09:19

I was also going to say Toulouse

www.toulouse-visit.com/toulouse-capital-aeronautics-and-space-industry

Easy jet fly there, lots of Airbnb places (stick centrally), good student area so cheap restaurants. And it's a great walking city so easy to get about and ok to give him some freedom to explore himself. And because of airbus a lot of international people so if you or he aren't confident French speakers it's easier going.

Mum1976Mum · 07/02/2024 09:30

Go on a cruise from Southampton. There’s some amazing deals to be had. Your son can hang out in the teen club and make friends, you get a rest and all you can eat food. Get off and wander around the local area at each port together. Easiest holiday we’ve ever done!

x88mph · 07/02/2024 09:35

I took my DC to Berlin last Feb and they loved it. Excellent value for money accommodation and plenty to see and do. Easy to get around on public transport too.

Funf · 07/02/2024 09:46

Have you considered a UK road trip?
Liverpool and Manchester both have a great selection of museums.
No doubt other places do too.
This one is defiantly different but it all has a Telecoms section which our son found very interesting, it charts Engines from Steam to jet and has days when you can see them up and running, local beach at Aberporth is fantastic too.
https://www.internalfire.com/

Internal Fire Museum of Power

https://www.internalfire.com/

Daisy12Maisie · 08/02/2024 00:23

Why don't you do a mini break instead. For example Tuesday - Thursday in Prague. £270 for person. That's on easy jet. Prague is beautiful and so cheap when you are there. Loads to do or you could do nothing and just wonder round and take it all in.

Bristolnewcomer · 08/02/2024 00:28

if Your son is planning to go to university or move elsewhere for work why not take him to somewhere he might live in the future. If he’s 16 he might be applying to university in the next couple of years. We did some great mini breaks to cities like Edinburgh (not to actually do a boring look round the university but just to experience the city).

Escapetosomewhere · 08/02/2024 08:34

you Are all so kind! These are brilliant suggestions thank you. we have been to Valencia once and I agree, it’s a good place for a teen trip, lovely city and science place is amazing.
A mini break takes the pressure off. A trip to university cities is good too, it would give us a purpose.
DS once said,’why would we go and stay in a hotel somewhere? It’s just another 4 walls ‘
thank you so much, many great ideas. I know it’s silly but I really need baby steps handed to me atm. I used to gleefully trundle anywhere on my Tod. I suggested he suggests somewhere but don’t get far. beginning to feel less terrified. How daft to get in such a state! I’ll steel myself to look at flights to your suggestion s! Thank you .

OP posts:
ScribblingPixie · 08/02/2024 09:08

The Telegraph and other newspapers often have (literal) step-by-step articles for city breaks if you google '48 hours in' or 'weekend in'. I suggested Berlin before, and that would be a break with a purpose if your son is at all interested in history (or David Bowie).

Toddlerteaplease · 08/02/2024 09:50

Don't bother with Cacassone

Escapetosomewhere · 08/02/2024 11:02

Thanks scribbling! will have to take DH to Berlin now you’ve mentioned that
thanks for the cacasonne toddler

OP posts:
Mynewnameis · 08/02/2024 11:20

I'd look at Barcelona. Berlin will be cold. Barcelona will be warm

Squiillionaire · 08/02/2024 23:09

This is maybe a bit late but Berlin I think out of your choice. Not hyper expensive, loads of interesting things for a 16 year old. I went with DS for a few days when he was 13. I think at 16 he would have enjoyed it even more. Toulouse I would say no. Cite de l'espace isn't that great. It is aimed at mich younger kids. And for a 16 year old there isn't much else in Toulouse.

Squiillionaire · 08/02/2024 23:14

Stockholm is also great. It needs a fair bit of planning to avoid it being hyper expensive but it can be done. Also Munich.

Paris also has loads of great stuff for that age.

But DS loved Stockholm and Berlin most of all. We went in the winter and it was cold but the advantage was cheaper hotels and much less crowded museums. DS still wears his Ampleman wooly hat from Berlin everyday to university in Paris in the cold weather.

ChunkyTofu · 09/02/2024 19:26

My teen loved touring the football stadium in Barcelona, and enjoyed the city in general.

Escapetosomewhere · 13/02/2024 06:55

Hello! Thanks for all the brilliant suggestions.
I don’t know what’s wrong with me, I’ve chickened out.
I got so stressed about the whole thing (why) and got nervous of trudging round a rainy city with DS and staying in a tiny room with a double bed.
maybe because when I chat to him he’s got all sullen and teen agey?

I immediately felt relieved - he was out with mates yesterday,phew! but of course now I wake up today and I’m feeling all peculiar again. Guilty and ashamed because I’m being a crap mum. like I put massive pressure on myself and get all confused and exhausted. MIL also keeps saying, ‘well your SIL is taking her DD to the moon with knobs on and touring costa rica’ or some such.
DH also said it was fine to go, so it’s not like he was making me feel guilty or anything. I don’t understand!
it’s been a traumatic year, maybe that’s to do with it? Now feel guilty and crap. DS presumably fine maybe a bit bored, I hate this! If anyone can help, please do. May have to post in the ‘rapidlylosingconfidenceineverything’ board. Thanks everyone, ideas much appreciated. I will use them to book for summer or October when there is not such a time pressure.
I could still book I guess but it’s like I want to but something is holding me back. Horrible. Don’t understand or like me, hate feeling guilty.

OP posts:
User373433 · 13/02/2024 07:11

I took my ASD DS after GCSEs when it was exam leave and cheaper to book last June to Barcelona. He isn't usually interested in day trips in the UK but agreed to come and enjoyed it. We did the science museum which was really good. I got a hotel with a rooftop pool which he didn't go in once, but he was happy to sit and read in the shade instead while I enjoyed it. He did enjoy the other touristy trips we did too, which he wouldn't have done at home. I asked him to help research and choose where we were going but he wasn't interested, I would have loved to have done that at his age. But he has asked if we can go away again together just us so it was definitely a success even though the idea took him out of his comfort zone.

I think Legoland in Germany or Denmark would be a good idea. Why not have a research of the top science museums in Europe, and see if any jump out and you can plan a trip around things he would enjoy?

User373433 · 13/02/2024 07:15

And it is overwhelming to book a city break like that. There is just so many decisions to make and it's a struggle when you don't have an enthusiastic person to do it with! But try to enjoy the research, don't forget to think what you'd enjoy too. Then once you've got a few choices, look for the cheapest flights (I found looking direct at easy jet/ryanair cheaper than Skyscanner) to help you decide the destination. Then you can book an Airbnb or hotel after you have your flights, and itinerary after that. Break it down so it isn't so overwhelming. Send DS YouTube or Tiktok videos of possible destinations. That worked to get mine interested.

parietal · 13/02/2024 07:17

Copenhagen has a brilliant science museum (experimentarium) and a good aquarium and lots of nice things to wander around

rookiemere · 13/02/2024 07:28

OP don't beat yourself up, you probably made the right decision.
Teens are feckless thankless creatures, and there's no point spending what is still a lot of money for an uncertain return.

Can you plan to go in May half term or Summer instead? Good weather and an outdoor pool helps with a lot of holidays. Maybe he could bring a friend if you rent an apartment rather than a hotel ?

TheaBrandt · 13/02/2024 07:44

Honestly dds friends are the rich private school set the majority are skiing or places like Costa Rica ffs! She’s seeing other friends/ treated ourselves to spa and pizza out / baking / home work / chilling out / vintage shopping in next city. No guilt here. These kids have amazing lives. Don’t give it a second thought op!

TheaBrandt · 13/02/2024 07:44

We don’t shell out for European city brains in Feb it’s mad the weather is shit.

TheaBrandt · 13/02/2024 07:46

And where does it end?! Foreign trip every school holiday?!

TheaBrandt · 13/02/2024 07:49

Being “bored” at 16 is part of the human condition. Not our job as parents to fix.

midgetastic · 13/02/2024 07:54

Why can you do a day trip or two ? A science museum or mining museum or sone such local that he might find interesting ( at least once he gets there if my teen was anything to go by)

I think it's quite good for teens to discover that they quite often enjoy doing something once they get going

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