Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Holidays

Use our Travel forum for recommendations on everything from day trips to the best family-friendly holiday destinations.

Original poster

To be desperate to go to India?

134 replies

malificent7 · 14/02/2022 07:01

I went to Nepal as a teen and was besotted and so am used to the culture/ poverty.
I am now 43 and am desperate to travel to India. We gave 2 teen girls...13/14 and i would love to take them too.
This is more of s tell me your stories of travelling round India but posting here for traffic. Post pandemic...is it safe atm?

OP posts:
tiktokontheclock · 14/02/2022 21:22

As an Indian, I'm seriously insulted.

Thewindwhispers · 14/02/2022 21:33

I would wait until the pandemic is over because I would be very afraid to rely on meeical facilities out there if I caught covid / needed ofher help. You remember the people dying in the street last year because they didn’t fit into the hospital, and hospitals ran out of oxygen… It could flare up again very fast.

I hope you get to go someday.

DramaAlpaca · 14/02/2022 21:43

I went to both India and Nepal thirty years ago with DH. Both countries are incredible and we had some amazing experiences, but being constantly harrassed and groped in India wasn't fun. In contrast I had no hassle whatsoever in Nepal. I'd love to go back, but am reluctant as I've heard that the hassling of women has got worse rather than better. I certainly wouldn't want to travel around with teenage girls, I'd be too worried about their safety.

TheOrigRights · 14/02/2022 22:27

I am 1/2 Indian and have visited many times. I am planning on going for 3 weeks over Xmas. We have family in New Delhi which makes things easier (not least the reassurance that should we get in a fix somewhere I will be able to call upon them). Me and DS23 and DS13 will travel around a bit, not on a hostel budget but not as part of a package, medium price hotels which will be clean and secure. We will travel by train or driver.
In all my visits I have never been harassed or felt unsafe. The biggest bother was how utterly fascinated people found my then 7 year old son's blonde hair, and wanted to touch him all the time.
I have had both the best and the worst times there. A broad mind and sense of humour helps, as well as just keeping your wits about you, being respectful and taking your time to get used to everything.

TheOrigRights · 14/02/2022 22:31

@tiktokontheclock

As an Indian, I'm seriously insulted.
It's quite shocking isn't it. I wonder if people would spout all this stuff if we were all sitting in a room together.
daimbarsatemydogsbone · 14/02/2022 22:32

Good grief

CaptaNoctem · 15/02/2022 00:06

After my last trip there I have vowed never to go again. Endless harrassment if my DH was not right by my side. It's never been that bad before.

The last straw was the security queues at Delhi when we were leaving. Men and women were segregated ( happens a lot) but if the men's queue got too long, the women's was stopped and the men allowed to use it as well whilst we waited. And waited. And waited. DH got through over an hour before I did.

Until they treat women better I'm not going back.

Original poster
malificent7 · 15/02/2022 07:00

I never meant to insult Indian people or India . Perhaps it's time to knock this thread on the head. I think it's one thing being a western traveller and quite another being a local.

OP posts:
PenStation · 15/02/2022 07:49

I think you’ve been given a hard time unnecessarily @malificent7

I hope you get a good break wherever it is you end up. I have to say that this thread is an eye opener regarding harassment of women in India. It’s been ten years since I’ve visited and I didn’t notice it being especially a problem but it sounds as though things have changed for the worse.

Bunnycat101 · 15/02/2022 07:57

When I travelled in India it was hard going and I joined a tour. I was terrified when I arrived at Delhi airport as I was surrounded by a large number of men and I remember a couple spotting me and telling me to join them. I was then scammed by my taxi driver to the hotel.

I saw some amazing things and places and I will never forget it but I didn’t always feel safe. I found Cambodia a much easier trip. I would only go back if I was a guest of a family or on a tour and I would never do Delhi airport again without pre-booked transfers.

GozerTheGozerian · 15/02/2022 08:05

I did the same as you OP and completely fell in love with Nepal. It’s beautiful, and I found the culture fascinating. I also travelled to India and was naive in my expectations, assuming it would be similar to Nepal in many ways.

I totally underestimated the differences. In my experience they were night and day. I’ve travelled to a lot of countries and India is the one place I would never go back to. Which is sad because I saw some amazing and beautiful places but the harassment was off the scale and I spent a lot of time feeling unsafe. I was sexually harassed, groped, stalked, leered at etc. etc. I still think about some of those experiences at it was about 20 years ago for me too.

For me the only way I think I would feel safe is a very secure, probably very expensive private tour. Which would completely insulate you from the country itself so probably be pointless.

Honesty - if you’d love to go back to that part of the world, I’d go back to Nepal in a heartbeat.

User48751490 · 15/02/2022 08:08

Happy to learn about India from the comfort of my own home via documentaries. Wouldn't want to travel there.

Teamill · 15/02/2022 08:13

I went to India with a friend just before the pandemic. We did an organised tour and visited Mumbai, Delhi, Jaipur and Kolkata. It was an amazing experience and I will remember it for the rest of my life. The vibrancy, the colours, the sounds, the food. Most of all, the wonderful people we met.

The poverty was heartbreaking and I now donate regularly to a charity to support Indian children. I know I can't make a huge difference though. I wish I could do more.

OhWhyNot · 15/02/2022 08:14

I would not take teenage girls

The harassment is beyond anything I’ve experienced anywhere else the touching the taking photos the following you around it’s relentless and I was travelling with a friend who is Indian (his parents are) they didn’t care they knew he was a westerner

Go when they are older. And don’t bother with Goa unless you are wanting to mix with pretentious hippy westerners

blackdumpling · 15/02/2022 08:20

I think if you want to go to India then go
But don’t drag your kids along
With the expectation that they will have an enlightening experience
Because your interrogation may be different to theirs
You couldn’t pay me to go there personally
Been to 3rd world countries
Don’t think it’s the only way to achieve enlightenment
IMO

Undecicive · 15/02/2022 08:35

I wouldn't say it'll be safe if it's only you and two young girls, no way. I was travelling with a boyfriend, I was stared at all the time, constantly, blatantly, I don't know what the hell they were thinking, but I's never go back there, especially with two girls.

HaveringWavering · 15/02/2022 08:37

My ex is from India so I have travelled there a lot. Personally I wouldn't go and try to travel independently as without speaking the language it would be very difficult. By all means go on an organised tour but to travel independently without speaking Hindi would be very difficult.

@Brainstorm21 English is spoken by many Indians throughout the country. Hindi is not a universal language there; India has tens of completely different, non mutually-intelligible local languages. I’ve travelled independently in North India, Bengal, Kerala, around Bangalore and never had any problem communicating in English.
Perhaps you got a false sense because you were travelling with a Hindi speaker so stayed in Hindi-speaking areas and never had to try using English?

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 15/02/2022 08:42

Dh went in December for about 10 days, main reason was to see a very old friend and colleague from when we lived in Oman, who was old and unwell.

TBH I thought it very unwise, because of COVID, but it was fine. He combined it with a trip to Darjeeling, and in the event we were both very glad he’d gone, because the old friend died shortly after Christmas.

I have been with dh, some years before COVID, and thoroughly enjoyed it.

shivawn · 15/02/2022 08:58

To echo the experiences of others on here, India was one of my least favourite places I've been and its down to the harassment of the men there, particularly up North. Thankfully I was travelling with my husband but it was very uncomfortable for me. I've travelled all over Africa, Asia and South America and have absolutely loved most places and never had the same reaction from men (not in such big numbers at least).

However, if you want to go you should just go. Travel is about experiences and I'm glad to have seen India even if I didn't ultimately enjoy it. You may well love it, plenty travellers do but please be safe, especially with your daughters.

Original poster
malificent7 · 15/02/2022 09:23

I won't take the girls here. I think dh and I may go when we are a bit older. I will definitely be covering up and/ or wearing a sari. I might well go bk to Nepal but im up for new adventures.
It's such a shame about the lechery. My best mate couldn't handle it but her mum loves Goa. Do older ladies have the same problem?

OP posts:
AlexaShutUp · 15/02/2022 09:29

I have been going to India regularly for over 20 years. Usually with my DH but also on my own. We have taken our daughter with us as well on multiple occasions. Yes, some of the men can be a bit leery, but I have never been in a situation where I have actually felt at risk. I have experienced far worse in some other Asian countries actually.

There are risks, undoubtedly. Violence against women in India is a serious problem. However, it's also a wonderful country in so many ways and I wouldn't let that put me off. After all, women aren't exactly 100% safe here in the UK. Male violence is everywhere.

saraclara · 15/02/2022 09:44

I've loved my independent trips to India, but I tend to feel that I need a holiday afterwards!

And yes, the hassle varies hugely by area. I had the most relaxing and unhassled trip to Darjeeling and Sikkim. But when I went to Kolkata I spent my last day in an internet cafe, because I just couldn't deal with it any more. Not sexual stuff (I'm old!) but the constant lying and pestering for my money. I just wanted to walk around the place but every few yards someone would pester me (lots of grabbing) and agreed prices for things would quadruple when it came to be time to pay. I ended up hating everyone so just escaped to the internet and talking to my friends and family at home.

But yes, you could avoid this by taking an escorted tour. Or maybe consider Sri Lanka instead?

Undecicive · 15/02/2022 14:15

@malificent7

I won't take the girls here. I think dh and I may go when we are a bit older. I will definitely be covering up and/ or wearing a sari. I might well go bk to Nepal but im up for new adventures. It's such a shame about the lechery. My best mate couldn't handle it but her mum loves Goa. Do older ladies have the same problem?
I was wearing a sari and a mala at the time. Still got stared at. Nepal though... I'd love to go there and my bucket list of countries is pretty short.
AlexaShutUp · 15/02/2022 14:28

Nepal is beautiful and definitely a bit "easier" to travel in than India. India is quite full on!Grin

Yeahthat · 15/02/2022 14:42

Be prepared for constant sexual harassment. It's not a safe place for you, or your girls.