Dear holiday cottage owners

[SylHellais]

We’re in one, and I felt the need to post a note to all holiday cottage owners as the following issues appear to be inherent.

• for the love of god, just buy a whole set of matching cutlery, plates and glasses. They are not expensive and it’s massively annoying to see a cupboard full of random glasses and bits of crockery you don’t want in your own house.

• sharpen your fucking knives.

• buy a set of three non stick saucepans and two non stock frying pans, one small and one large. They don’t have to be expensive.

• when women wash their hair, they need an additional bath towel.

• a plug socket, near a mirror. Thank you please.

• bin bags. And tell guests which bin is for what.

• can you please fix all the small things like the seal around the wood burner which fills the cottage with smoke, or the pedal bin which doesn’t pedal, or the radiator which is stuck on full chat because the valve is broken, or the oven which is impossible to work out how to operate.

Your guests will thank you.

We've rented plenty of 'high end' properties and are generally careful and clean. We did lose a towel in the last one (a hand towel) which one of the DC took off to wash their hair and ended up in another rental. It took a lot of extra communication to get the towel back to its home.

Considering the cost of holiday lets in the UK (we usually pay around £4K for a week in summer), I'd have thought that there'd be an in-built 'wear/tear and losses' amount built into the cost?

We did rent one place though that had very unreliable Wi-Fi even though that it had been promoted as having it. The owner's excuse was that teenagers shouldn't need it on holiday (clearly not having had them since IT became mainstream!).

People taking stuff is probably a bit like the tight-wads who remove every last light bulb etc. when they move. I'm guessing that if you're paying a considerable amount for a holiday let you might feel entitled to take away loo rolls, washing up liquid that you've essential paid for?

I am always happy if stuff like dishwasher tablets are left but always take my own. I've been to places without even a bin bag left

Unless you're staying in a bargain basement type property, I really think you should expect loo rolls, washing up liquid, some dishwasher tablets etc. left for your use.

Yes, this was in the USA so we had nothing as we had flown there (obviously) 😅

The glasses are more complicated than you might imagine as they tend to get broken and replaced with something approximating the originals.

All the little things are because unless the owner lives on site and has replacement everything in stock - including fridges, loo seats, taps, showers etc there isn't time to do the clean and go and buy replacements.

If you tell the owner when things get broken, including the little things they'll have a chance of sorting it before the next renter. If you hide it then they don't have a ducking prayer of sorting it.

Pint glasses, I drink a lot and don’t want a small glass.

Towels. Fucking buy decent sized ones not hand towels that don’t wrap around me. And if I’m there for a week leave me a spare, most people shakers every day now.

Dishwashing tablets. Don’t ration them and leave me only 1. I’m not going to steal a £5 pack of them when I’m paying extortionate amounts to be here

Oh and TV’s! What’s wi the the tiny TV’s when we all have giant ones at home now and have to watch a tiny one on holiday. But a big tv they are cheap now

I don't cook much on holiday, but I do resent having to wash up loads because there's only as many place settings as beds. IMO there needs to be 3x everything per bed so that I only have to wash up or run the dishwasher once daily. Mismatched is fine.

Also I really resent instructions about leaving the place sparkling clean, but then providing no hoover, broom, dustpan or sponges. I don't mind buying a couple of cleaning products that I can take home, but I draw the line at hardware.

Over the years we have managed to break one mug, one glass, and set fire to the corner of one teatowel. These are semi-regular occurrences at home, and I don't think a sign of undue carelessness, but we always replace with something decent and as near to matching as possible, and let the owners know.

We are very lucky, we've found a little gem in our nearby National Park that we stay in each Christmas. The farmers who own the property are very accommodating, they are happy for us to host family for Christmas lunch, giving us the use of their own spare dining room chairs, offering to move tractors etc so our family can park easily. They provide dog towels for those muddy walks and plenty of logs for the fire. They even let my DH and DS "help" with the milking. They say they like us as we tell them if something gets broken (a glass once), leave the place clean and tidy, keep them informed and pay in cash. We've been shocked at the stories about the behaviour of other guests.
My main niggles going elsewhere have been:
No gate or only half a fence when a property with a garden is advertised as "secure and dog friendly".
Cleaners who don't look up and leave millions of spiders the size of dinner plates growling above the beds.
A wardrobe but no chest of drawers in the bedroom.
Anything else I can live with, I'm pretty laid back and organised with the usual consumables. I would never book anywhere with a shared garden, without a washing machine or without at least an over the bath shower.

I always try to work out how comfortable the sofa is by studying the photos. Some sofas are just horrible

Am I the only to think £5k profit a year is decent when that means the mortgage in your second property is also being paid?
I mean presumably the idea is that you are left owning a nice property somewhere pretty?

No. The idea is to have an income from an investment, in this case property.

I live in the pretty place myself already.

@movinghouseatlast But paying a mortgage is an investment. And the income is the increase in what you own. If you owned a house and only had £5k from rental then that would be fair enough to say it is not worth it.
Your real income is the profit from rental plus your mortgage payments.

Talk of your profits of 3-5k is making me feel much better! We own a barn conversion holiday let next door to our house and every time I do my books for my accountant I look at the gross and net income and think huh? Is the taxman going to believe me? It sounds like he will if the figures being quoted here are true.

We charge 1200 in peak season for a Cornish sleeps six property with 4 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms, big garden and games room. Close to the sea but no actual sea view (tho on a stormy night you can hear it!). Big TV, fire pit, bbq and well equipped kitchen (people have baked birthday cakes and bread and full Xmas lunch in it in the past!)

I also think a lot of people look at the costs of hiring accommodation in Europe and UK holiday homes are much more expensive.

And we get a lot of repeat bookers do something must be right!
Most of our guests are lovely. They really are. Occasional horrors tho, like the family who brought a parrot with them abs let it fly around, pooping all over the place
And the people who book, knowing it sleeps six, and listing six guests as coming and who days before their stay cal and say 'oh you don't mind, we're just bringing a couple of extras, don't worry they'll sleep on blow up mattresses....'. Grrrr! Cheeky f@ckers! Rent a bigger property. But no, I grit my teeth a say oh no that's fine. But it's not!

@Wallywobbles

The glasses are more complicated than you might imagine as they tend to get broken and replaced with something approximating the originals.

All the little things are because unless the owner lives on site and has replacement everything in stock - including fridges, loo seats, taps, showers etc there isn't time to do the clean and go and buy replacements.

If you tell the owner when things get broken, including the little things they'll have a chance of sorting it before the next renter. If you hide it then they don't have a ducking prayer of sorting it.

I don't see a loo seat, fridge or shower as a little thing. If a shower is broken you get a plumber in to replace it immediately or put a new loo seat in. And if you don't live close by, you need reliable people nearby to do these things.

@shallIswim

And we get a lot of repeat bookers do something must be right! Most of our guests are lovely. They really are. Occasional horrors tho, like the family who brought a parrot with them abs let it fly around, pooping all over the place And the people who book, knowing it sleeps six, and listing six guests as coming and who days before their stay cal and say 'oh you don't mind, we're just bringing a couple of extras, don't worry they'll sleep on blow up mattresses....'. Grrrr! Cheeky f@ckers! Rent a bigger property. But no, I grit my teeth a say oh no that's fine. But it's not!

I had a family who bought a parrot too! I did say pets are welcome but maybe I should have been more specific and said dogs! 🤣🤣

@Dogmum40 gosh I wonder if they were the same family. It was an African Grey parrot.

I see a big difference between people who rightly treat this as a business and those who make excuses about how hard it is to maintain a house when they do not live near by.
No one cares if you live close or not. People are paying for a service and expect to receive that service.
And I have never broken anything in a holiday cottage. Not even a glass. Always leave it reasonably tidy and clean.

I went to one in the US where they had a folder that had take out menus, and maps to local places in, great. It also had a list of the kitchen items and said where they were from in town, asking if you broke any, to please buy another plate/dish whatever that matched the ones in the kitchen. That way you weren't ripped off by them taking money from the deposit for more than the cost of a mug or bowl.

I leave cleaning equipment (tucked away discreetly with no signposting) because guests kept asking for it! I don't expect guests to clean it, tho I am always secretly thrilled when they strip the beds and I find the dishwasher has already been emptied!

I did stay in a lovely place in Spain. We turned up and the owner apologised and said the previous people had left the place a mess and she hadn't finished cleaning. We agreed to leave our bags there and go and have a wander and get a drink. I was concerned as I could see the place was still very dirty. But when we returned it was totally spotless.
The people who had been staying there had been paid for by their employer while they were working as well. So given it was a gorgeous house they must have been well paid professionals with zero consideration. Presumably their workplace paid for the extra cleaning.

[quote shallIswim]@Dogmum40 gosh I wonder if they were the same family. It was an African Grey parrot. [/quote]
I’m not sure which kind it was unfortunately but she was an older lady and bought her hubby, daughter and granddaughter if that helps! Lovely but yes my cleaner got a shock after they left 🤣

Oooo another horror story to sit alongside the parrot. Me and my cleaned entered the property on changeover day and were confronted with an awful smell.
All no washing up had been done for days and there was actual mould in the cooking pots. It was like the worst student house ever! They must have cooked for two nights, not washed up, and done takeaway and eaten out for the remaining 5 nights. So weird!
At the other end of the spectrum our nicest guests did reiki healing on my dog who had sprained himself.