Careers for highly sensitive people (orchid child)

[Wearegettingthere]

What sort of careers would you suggest for a highly sensitive person?DD likes acting but that is a competitive world. She doesn’t want to do office jobs. I thinking working for herself would suit her best. Something like therapist, acupuncturist, etc. She is very creative, perspective, imaginative but doesn’t cope well in stressful environments.

Love this. I am definitely trying to raise basic bitch dandelions.

And though all of this... the OP makes no mention whatsoever of autism, whether diagnosed or even suspected. Everyone has jumped on the neurodiversity bandwagon yet again. Being sensitive and/or disliking stressful environments is not an autism diagnosis. It might be an indicator, in combination with many other factors, but on its own it does not mean that sensitive = autistic.

MN is notorious for people 'diagnosing' ND whenever somebody is anything other than extremely confident and outgoing.

Everybody is attacking the OP for using the term. It’s nasty, shitty bullying.
the poster I replied to- not you incidentally- was insulting and not merely pointing out the “absurdity” of term as you call it. Calling people with autism or people who are sensitive a wet lettuce is insulting. At least it’s insulting to me and my daughter. It may not affect you but it affects me greatly. I’m sick to death of those kind of comments by people who have no idea of what my dd and many others go through. And you are not mumsnet HQ here

Well to be fair, not everyone has a property abroad and can set our delicate flowers up in businesses they can 'lead'.

The French term for dandelion is pis en lit, and they used to be called piss-a-beds in rural England too.

Plus, setting up an orchid/ dandelion binary is pretty insulting to all concerned, IMHO. There's much more to each individual than a collection of symptoms.

I can see the attraction for someone casting around for a hook for a book, but that's as far as it goes.

Amen!

id suggest letting her choose her own path. Let her get an after school or weekend job or summer job . She might surprise herself about what she enjoys.

I’m still none the wiser on an orchid child and now a dandelion has entered the chat. The joys of being old lol

the OP needs to stop labelling the child & encourage them to find their own interest's and pursue what interests them.

no parent should be decidinf what career their chikd should follow

I’d get her some counselling, put
her in situations to build up her resilience and reality.

Agreed. "Orchid children thrive on routine, predictability, and consistent care."

This, 100% @GuelderRoses i have friends who are autists - in my experience, it’s what they are not a disease they have. They are lovely people, caring and friendly.

And the OP used a very silly term, but did not mention autism. Other posters did.

I reiterate, we are all sensitive. Because we’re all human.

I reject the orchid/dandelion fallacy. I feel a bit sad for those who’ve had to hide or diminish their sensitivity (dandelions?) and who are then loaded up with the responsibility of carrying the load for these “special” sensitive flowers.

But I really think this is about the OP. @Wearegettingthere seems to want to claim some sort of special status herself, through her DD. I see that too often, and it damages children.

That’s a really good point - find the right place to position them then add a few drops of water every few days. Wisteria is very hard to grow. When it does flourish, it’s always attached to something stable.

I think the term is offensive and degrading to the child concerned and is offensive and degrading to children who may be the complete opposite.

Asking how can I build resilience and boost confidence for a shy child is positive and pragmatic. Asking how can I getting my child to continue to withdraw from society and hide away from social situations rather than learning to deal with difficulties is negative and harmful to that child.

These labels effectively restrict the children concerned and box them into a set of beliefs of that's who they are and they can never be anything else. That posters mentality reflects this from the word go.

A child who is highly sensitive at school, may merely just be in an environment that doesn't suit them and be dominated by those around them and the social structure of school. A few years down the line who knows? I know plenty of people who would fit the box of highly sensitive, retiring types at school (often the nerds and geeks who don't fit in) who have gone on to thrive and be very confident and aspirational after they've left.

Orchid child is one of the worst pre-judgments I've seen on MN. I don't think dandelion child as a term is remotely better either and also carries more than a hint of jealousy and resentment.

I'm doubling down on my previous message that I feel a desire to spray weedkiller everywhere on seeing those terms.

Orchid child 😂😂😂

Maybe id better equip my child to cope in the real world, in fact that is what I've done 🤷‍♀️

My dd is ND, extremely sensitive with sensory processing difficulties and yet ive managed to raise her to be independent, hard working (she’s worked since she was 16 in a variety of jobs) and resilient. She’s off travelling to Australia in a few weeks and going to uni in September.

Micromanaging your child is doing them no favours.

These labels effectively restrict the children concerned and box them into a set of beliefs of that's who they are and they can never be anything else. That posters mentality reflects this from the word go.

Brava @RedToothBrush

Agree. My dd has Autism and she is by far the most strong minded woman proud to say as she sees it. She is 11 and her career path might be a MMA cage fighter. She isn't some shy sensitive delicate little soul. I guess another reason it's less diagnosed in girls.

Maybe OPs dd has experienced some trauma? Maybe OP is fragile. Who knows? I'm raising a strong minded girl who has very set ideas to navigate a harsh world as we all parent differently.

Luckily or unlucky for my ddis she was born outgoing and with a disproportionate amount of self confidence.

I may not be mumsnet HQ but you'd be surprised just how many people have reacted positively to my posts.

Besides, when I see something on here that's unpleasant, offensive or insulting, not only do I report the post to MNHQ, I will also try to challenge that poster on the thread.

I am autistic myself, and I'd find being labelled as an 'orchid' really quite condescending and offensive.

And I find wet lettuce offensive and we are both free to express those views

I have never known anyone with autism be described as such.

The term 'wet lettuce' is usually used to describe someone who is a bit of a wimp, not someone with neurodiversity.

I agree, I’ve got a profoundly autistic son and he’s the very opposite of an orchid child.

He’s whatever the plant equivalent of barbed wire is.

I think you should read the post I was replying to

Never heard these expressions for children in my life. 'Orchid child' and 'Dandelion child.' Whhhhhaaaaaaaaat???

P.S. meant to add.... There's no where safe for an orchid in the world, without it being a literal glass jar and a closed environment.

Maybe a remote admin assistant, designer, etc where they are given jobs and don't have to interact with anyone. The challenge there is....that job is not future proof and will be taken up by AI or have too much competition.

Very well said.

What kind of orchids do you have?

like I said upthread, I am a shit Gardener and can barely keep grass alive.

orchids however, right pot, right windowsill, and the fuckers are taking over. I chuck water at them once every couple of months and they flower almost constantly.

they’re about the hardiest indoor plant I have.