Parents of Durham freshers 2025

[MillicentFaucet]

We've chatted on a different threads over the past few months so do any anxious/excited/slightly overwhelmed parents want to congregate here for Durham chat?
My DS will be starting an MEng next month and has been allocated to Cuths 🐯(but no confirmation of what type of accommodation he has yet).
He's slowly working his way through registration etc and fretting about the important things like what to wear for matriculation <sigh>
How's everyone else getting on?

16! And I thought my DD’s house-seeking group was sizeable! Good job they’re looking for a few properties between them. 😂

My DD is also house-hunting. There are 5 of them. It looks like they may have found somewhere opposite the cat cafe which is DD’s perfect location!

Bless her. Dd, was at JS last year and had done little cooking before but has come on a bit.
Good if your Dd can develop good knife skills, so for example chopping up an onion finely and quickly will be easier. Also, little things like cooking onions until they go translucent and you can smell the sweetness or reducing the liquid in gravy and stews help to intensify flavours.
Hope she enjoys her course!

Quick question, what are posters’ kids paying per week (roughly) for accommodation for second year?

DD will be paying 149pw + bills. She’s taken a smaller room in the house and is using the shared bathroom. Bigger houses can have a mix of room sizes and bathroom access (shared family bathrooms, en-suites), so her group did a tiered breakdown of fees to suit a range of budgets.

I’ve heard 160pw + bills is pretty typical for Durham.

My nephew is at Durham. Pays £165 plus bills.
Look at Durham Sturents to see what’s available and prices. As you go into Gilesgate you find more cheaper properties. Neville’s Cross can be cheaper too. Elvet is often expensive and Viaduct on the more expensive end. But that said, you can easily find differences of over £50 per week, which across a 52 week contract is a vast sum.

One thing I’ve noticed is that flats are often good. They are often well insulated, have lots of bedrooms of same size and can be just a bit cheaper.

Dd pays £143 pw including bills. Trade off is that she’s a 30 min walk from classes instead of about 20 min like many of her friends.
Two, of four, housemates really pushed for this place because of greater affordability but they won’t renew for next year as they all want something a bit closer.

@Maggiethecat - thanks for your kind words and i think the knife skills point is a very good one! Something for DD to work on, definitely. She is enjoying JS very much and seems to be enjoying her course also (Liberal Arts: humanities subject + a language). Hope your DD is also!

Ah, @Dery you’be reminded me our DDs are on the same course with a similar config! How is your DD finding it? Mine is loving her language (Chinese ab initio, challenging but she’s hurled herself into it) but is finding that so far the other subjects seem light in comparison. I suspect exam season is going to feel pretty stressful when they all reach their peak at the same time!

@RayonSunrise - yes, i was wondering how your DD was getting on!

DD is really enjoying Arabic (ab initio like your DD). She’s spending quite a lot of time practising the script, i think. She knew the alphabet from Duolingo but of course you never handwrite on Duolingo. She said one of her philosophy options felt more like physics to start with - not a particular strength - so she felt a bit dismayed! But she’s into it now. Yes, i think exam season will be stressful!

Our elder DD is in her 3rd year at Edinburgh studying history + Arabic, spending this year in Cairo. So we’re all off there at various points over this year. Presumably, you have a trip to China on the horizon for 2027/2028!

Yes! I confess I’m quietly excited by the prospect of a visit with someone who can speak the language. 😁

We pay £715 pm including bills, it’s a nice house as student houses go in a nice road but 25 mins walk to the science site, they’ve already all signed up to stay again for next year and rent has increased to £750 pm 🙄

Oh and we have to pay £200 just for the pleasure for them to sign up again for the following year! 🤬 £1200 from the household!!

I'm very worried about my daughter. She didn't have any friends during the entire time at 6th form and secondary school. Was badly bullied in primary. Been diagnosed with a few mental illnesses. We all thought that uni would be a fresh start for her and she thought so as well. However, a month before freshers week she got very nervous and wanted to take a gap year. But didn't in the end. She was very ill during freshers so didn't come out of her room much. She hasn't met anyone since and still has no friends or even acquaintances. Said that she had some small talk but didn't work. I don't know what's happened but she's stopped going to lectures and stopped attending societies. It sounds like she's given up. She hasn't called and barely texted, we got worried so called the porters to check on her. We're scared she may harm herself as she has tried to before multiple times. I'm worried sick about her and it breaks my heart. I don't know what to do.

So sorry to hear this, @RedBlueOrangePurple. I think it’s easy for our DCs to imagine everyone else is having it easy but your DD has had a particularly difficult time. To start with, does her college offer support services? Are they able to help? Also, are you able to base yourself in Durham for a few days and get a fix on things?

Go visit her and make an assessment yourself. Bring her home if you need to. It’s an expensive exercise if she can’t bring herself to leave her room. I hope she’s ok.

And i agree with @W0tnow - once you’ve seen the lie of the land, you may decide you need your bring her home. There’s no shame in that. Your DD has had a very difficult time and a year out and starting again next year, at Durham or somewhere else, may be just what she needs especially if she’s able to work, earn some money and make some work friends.

@RedBlueOrangePurple - sending best wishes to you and your Dd.
Agree that if you can it’d be best for you to go see her to support and assess.

Echo posters above. Please go there in person asap if she has withdrawn from doing anything and is not in contact.
And if she does choose to continue I have seen other parents reach out on the Facebook gp Parents of Durham
university students - they have put a note on saying which college and course and others have privately messaged them if their son or daughter is able to reach out.
As others have said, no shame in having a break or leaving uni if it’s not for her.

And I’m sure you know this but you can use the 111 option 2 service as soon as you’re with her either in Durham or back home to get some guidance on next steps if needed.

@RedBlueOrangePurple, I agree with the previous comments - go to her. If she’s had a tough few years leading up to this she may well need more support getting settled, and if she’s withdrawing it sounds like she could use some help locating where that support could come from at Durham. And maybe a gap year would be good for her - but that‘s all to discuss with her in person. ❤️

I hope you don’t mind me jumping on this thread. Dd is on the verge of submitting her UCAS form, with her choices all decided. Yesterday she came home from school and said she’d been looking at Durham (I think a teacher at school suggested it, on the basis she should aim high).

We’ve not even been to an open day (!) although I know there are offer holder days available. It is very highly rated for her subject (geography) and she did really well in her recent mocks. Even so I think Durham might be a stretch. I’m also conscious from reading other threads that Durham is quite small and I’ve seen it described as a feeling a bit insular.

Just wondering whether it’s mad to even consider it at this stage, without having even visited. Particularly keen to hear from those with state school backgrounds and how well they have settled in (especially anyone doing geography!).

(sorry for the thread hijack)

What are her predicted grades? And other choices?

I think over 90% of applicants for Geography get offers, if meeting or exceeding standard offer.

She’s predicted A*AA and her other (what I thought were decided) choices are Edinburgh, Sheffield, York, Birmingham and Royal Holloway.
She’s a bit doubtful about the course at York and seemed really enthused by the sound of the Durham course.