How much per month do you give your young person?

[0hno]

I think the loan should cover the accommodation so I'm wondering how much to give them per month to live on? They don't spend much, don't drink (currently!)

The (capped) loan did not cover the cost of accommodation for for our DC.

We paid the rent, they lived off the loan. It was about £550 - £700 a month (depending on university location) and yes, it was absolutely crushing financially at times.

My son's minimum loan doesn't cover his accommodation.

We top up his money to the amount he would get if he were on a full loan. Out of that he has to pay for the balance of his accommodation, food, travel, socialising, phone, insurance (he had to top up his basic halls policy with a specialist musical instrument/sound equipment one) and anything else he might want or need.

Mine got £1000 a term. They also worked 12 hours minimum a week and throughout the holidays.

Actually crying reading these. Wish I hadn't asked. I've really let her down

You haven’t. Lots of students have a part time job and with what you’re giving her, she’ll be ok. She has savings too.

How much loan will they get? Our son got £4,524 this year. His accommodation is £7,599 so we give him the £3,075 difference which works out at £439 per month for 7 months. In addition to that we give him £45 per week spread over the whole 52 weeks of the year. If we gave it to him term time only it would work out at about £68 per week. That's what he has to live on.

In addition he works. He doesn't have a regular job but takes on ad hoc contracts playing keyboard for theatre shows/rehearsals. He can earn between £200-350 per week doing that but he does maybe 8-12 per year and has travel costs to take out of that too.

I'm a single parent. I earn £42k. No maintenance from Dad. My daughter will be looking a uni in 2 years ( and her brother shortly after that) and I honestly don't know how I will fund this. I have not one penny left, not a penny.

We are a long way off uni but I’m working on saving £50k for DD (saving a couple
of thousand a year since birth), a lot may change in the funding model but I am assuming we will pay accommodation plus £100pw in today’s money.

I’d rather have a lump sum in savings we can draw down than have to find it from our monthly budget as we will be close to retirement age then.

But if you haven’t got it, you haven’t got it. It is very hard for students and families now.

Ok, then I’m sorry if my last post was harsh…

You haven’t let her down. It’s very difficult for neurodivergent young people who would struggle to work part time alongside uni. The reality is that most students have to.

Will she be able to go to uni locally and live at home? Is that an option?

Claiming PIP can be difficult. But this is my job (welfare rights lawyer working on PIP appeals) and I wouldn’t dismiss it out of hand. It can be easy not to notice the amount of prompting and support you are needing to provide. Many autistic people do claim (including me). If you do decide to try, I’d get help to complete the form from an agency with expertise.

I looked at the uni my DD is hoping to go to, it suggests in 24/25 they need £11,000 altogether for 9 months of the year. She will get the £5k odd minimum maintenance loan so assume we will have to give her £6000 divided by 9, which is £650 a month for 9 months of the year (or £500 a month over 12 months).

Gulp.

In the holidays she will be living at home and will need to work most of it. If she works four days a week most of the summer hols which should bring in £1500 - £2000, which she should be able to use for the bigger one off things she needs to buy or a couple of weeks backpacking in the summer/driving lessons.

Plus there are savings - I won't be paying for her music lessons nor her bus fares to school anymore, nor her haircuts (that is around £200 a month saved)

So I am hoping it won't be quite such a hit as it first looked to be.

Maybe a job would be good for her personal development? You can only cut your coat to fit your cloth. She will have to use the savings in term time and maybe look for work in the holidays. Budgeting is a good skill to learn. I'm sure that a lot of people manage with less. You are supporting her and that's what matters.

You absolutely have not let her down. Fuck that. £200 a month is more than many will get and she will muddle through. We would all love to give our DC enough to get through uni so that they don't have to worry about money, and some people can, some can't. They are transitioning to being an adult and some of us have more money than others, it's just life.

She could try a gap year with a part time job before going to uni (my ND teen is doing this) and will save as much as possible. During that year I will also be putting away the £200 a month I will be giving her for uni and not telling her, so that I have a head start/buffer to provide. Does she know how to budget for food and make simple meals? That will go a long way to helping the budgeting. Don't forget your bills will go down a little when she is at uni so that might give you a little flex. It can be tough for them to work whilst at uni, but not impossible so that might turn out ok. Gradually build some stocks of toiletries and clothes she might need if you can do that she doesn't need to buy these out of budget.

You're a good mum and don't let any replies to your post (which have not meant to upset you, but I get it) make you feel otherwise.

I was at uni 15 years ago and I remember I was transferred £100 a month from my parents (I didn’t have a job whilst there either). I’m sure others had more and I know it was a while ago now but it was absolutely fine.

Pretty gobsmacked reading some of these replies! The answer is you give her what you can afford. You’ve not let her down at all - you’ve supported her to the stage of getting into university and I’ve no doubt you will do your absolute best for her while she’s there. Hopefully she can pick up some work in the summer or part time to help supplement her income; uni may be able to help her get something

You haven't let her down AT ALL. You have brought up and supported a dd who is doing really well and has her sights set on uni. That's brilliant!!

Ignore the comments about how many hundreds people are giving their kids for socialising each month - that's a nice to have and your dd might not want to do that anyway. Or if she does, she can hopefully find weekend or evening work to fund it. There will loads of kids in the same boat as your dd. She also has some savings to fall back on if needed.

It's a big shock, isn't it? My colleague has just discovered this a few weeks ago. They will get minimum loan and accommodation is 10k, apparently. A lot of people who went to uni back when it was affordable have absolutely no idea.

Another colleague's daughter will commute to London from home for uni and keep her part time job, so no loan except for fees.

When I had DS1 we were on benefits and full loan was enough to cover accomodation and food and usually a part time job for fun money was easy to come by. So I never really thought about it.
Now we have a household income of £70k ish but only since the last year, it was £30k plus benefits before that, so no time to save.
When we were looking at uni for DS1, I discussed finances with him and explained I couldn't afford top him up to the full amount, so we looked at uni choices in terms of accommodation costs as well as the course and he planned to work full time for a gap year to save. He's chosen a different path, for now and hoping for a degree apprenticeship opportunity in future.

We pay the accomodation, it's cost us around £1300 per month this last year with two at uni, next year back to one will be £800 a month.
We pay for phone contracts and train fares home but nothing else.
They live off the maintenance loan (minimum) plus top up from part time jobs.

There will be some universities that might be out of reach. My daughter has decided to return to study after living and working away from home for 3 years. As an independent student she should get full loan but she turned down Brighton on the basis of cost. Off the top of my head there are a few areas such as Brighton, Bristol, Edinburgh, Durham, maybe York that are out of kilter accommodation wise but there still lots of excellent universities in more affordable areas including Oxbridge where accommodation is highly subsidised.

So on your income if your daughter were to have gone to university this year they would get a loan of approx £7,800. You would be expected to contribute approx £2,425 per year. That equates to £46.50 ish over the whole 52 weeks of the year or £60.50 over 40 weeks of term. Based on how my household expenses changed when ds left you will probably save that amount on your weekly food/utility bills alone. Although I do realise you will lose child benefit.

Hopefully that has put your mind at rest a little.

"We earn about 70k between us and our mortgage is £500. Run one car. No childcare costs. We have NOTHING left."

@biggangster I realise this is nosy, but I really am curious as to why you have nothing left on 70k with none of the above costs??

You have in no way let her down. I will list what our eldest has cost us so you can see what that looks like.

Ds is in his final year. Actual costs, food £30 - £35 ish per week, that includes salmon fillets, mince and chicken and eggs, he has a set 2 week menu because he has a Tesco delivery (we pay the yearly fee for that) it includes making lunches so sandwich fillings too which would be ham, chicken etc. He cooks from scratch except for filled pasta and a jar of pasta sauce on days when he is tired.

Laundry, wash is £3.90 (£3.30 if choosing eco on the usual Circuit laundry) tumble is £1.90. Ds reckons at a push you can get 10 days worth of clothing in a washing machine, he washes his bedding and towels in another machine. This would be term time only or "30 weeks" which it isn't' because they usually finish just after their exams, for this year that is 29th May a whole month before his "term" finishes, same for previous years too.

We pay his phone contract sim only £10 a month from Voxi.

We gave him £100 a week term time only, which he has savings from because he has no course materials, rarely travels home due to workload and if they get together with mates it is in someone's kitchen/house and they bring their own drinks ie can of Kopparberg cider would be just over £1 per can in a pub that would be £4. That £100 covers food, laundry, any socialising.

His Grandad also gives him £50 per month, this he uses to pay Amazon Prime (student discount) Netflix, Spotify. He has plenty of money left over from both our contribution and his Grandad so has put that into a LISA for a house deposit.

Lots of students do not live lavish lifestyles of cocktails and brunches, sadly no one wants to see content of a standard student life in Insta.

I should add we paid and still pay for his clothes, a pair of waterproof trainers, winter coat, waterproof coat, summer puffa, hats, gloves, scarf, he has about 4 pairs of trainers, unbranded plain hoodies, t shirts etc. For Christmas he got JustEat vouchers from everyone so he could have a takeaway or two.

We're paying accommodation for ds. He has the minimum loan and that will be his spends. He has savings and will be working. I've been saving for a while now to help. It's going to be tight!

I will also be buying some toiletries and shelf stable food over the coming weeks for him to take with him and will continue through the year so he always take more with him whenever he comes home.

What's the gap between loan and maximum loan?

That's the amount that needs to be found. Work with your child to work out how to find it, say you need to find £4k, perhaps you can manage £2.5k of that, then she needs to work out how to raise the remaining £1.5k - from savings or working usually. Remember they get long holidays with plenty of time to work.

Good luck.

Please don't be upset. You absolutely haven't let her down! My parents didn't have the money to give me anything substantial and I managed. My mum paid for a food shop once a month, train tickets if I wanted to come home and the 'big' expenses like trips etc. My loan just about covered my rent.
I had to get a job for 'fun money', my course was 5 full days a week and I had to work in a restaurant in the evenings.

you have not let her down, £50 per week will easily feed her if she budgets. She wont be able to be frivolous but she can get a job to supplement, many students do. I know she finds it harder, but she is going to have to find a job at some point in her life, or else what is the point of going to uni.

Find the earn £10 per day thread on here, you can earn pocket money doing surveys etc

It is a huge draw to employers if graduates have some work experience, even if it is not related. It would actually put her at a disadvantage if she doesn't work whilst at uni.

We do it the other way round. For our DDs we pay for accommodation (has varied between £450 and £630 per month), and the student maintenance loan goes to them for living costs and bills. Both girls did part time jobs to top up.