Oxford/Cambridge - current students support/chat thread 2022 - cont

[Panicmode1]

@petitebleu - so sorry to hear about your DS. I hope that some time out over Christmas may help to give him some space and time to think about his next steps.

@pantjog what a terrible time for your poor DD2 trying to submit her Prelims and having tech. difficulties! Good luck to your DD1 with the next 50% of her exams. At least it's the final stretch. Also good luck to all those DCs in the middle of exams and/ or about to start.

DS1 (C) finished his last one today. He's very relieved and I think they've apparently gone OK - at least he thinks so. DS2 (O) has one more to go on Friday and then another day long assessment/interview for his career possibilities and then he too can breathe a sigh of relief. His exams seem to be going OK too, from what he says but of course you can never tell and we still don't know if and when DS1's will be marked.

What's really weird for them both is that this will be the last time they ever write essays on their subjects and these topics and I think they'll really miss that and also the tutorial/ supervision system. They've really loved their time at Oxbridge and enjoyed their subjects and just feel so glad they had the chance of these three years there.

Now DS1 has 3 May Balls lined up plus various other events and DS2 has one May Ball and lots of other events too. So their last weeks should be a lot of fun.

I'm hoping to meet up with them both in London when DS2 has finished his finals and interviews too.

Of the four (finals) exams DS has completed so far, two of them have included at least one error which directly affected the solution to the question. He says they are given a correction sheet when this happens, but for today's paper this was issued when the exam had nearly finished.

@mutterphore you must be very proud of both of them; I'm glad they are getting the opportunity to take part in post-exam celebrations, especially after such a restricted start to their university experience.

@Ironoaks I'm shocked that your poor DS had to deal with a mistake in two of his 4 exams! That's pretty bad and could put him and others off completely. Surely exam questions should be checked and re-checked to ensure this doesn't happen? I hope he managed to get it all finished and wasn't too disrupted. Good luck for his final two exams and thanks for your your good wishes.

Getting a correction sheet late in the exam seems very poor to me. I hope your DS was able to finish the paper in spite of the disruption @ironoaks.

It’s good to know your DS was able to reschedule job application assessments around his finals @mutterphore. The same thing happened to DD last year. She applied for her current job in the gap between submitting her dissertation and sitting finals and the final interview clashed with her viva. So much pressure for our DC in a short space of time!

I apologise initially for what may be an upsetting post.

I can't help being preoccupied with DS sitting his first year end exam this morning (1st year). While he seems fine and confident he has had to contend with the sad news that one of his former 6th form colleagues has collapsed and died at Oxford earlier this week. They had a course in common and DS admired him for being a far more able and instinctive mathematician and they had also kept in touch through Varsity activities such as last December's ski trip. Fortunately, DS has a good and steady study partner with whom he has a mutual support arrangement in the same staircase but this kind of thing is really such a bolt from the blue. It is the second former classmate that he has lost; the first was while he was in his A level year.

I should add that my preoccupation has got in the way of acknowledging that this must be utterly, utterly devastating for his family. An insensitive and ill-considered piece of thoughtlessness.
Knowing how much it takes to get our DCs to this stage; freighted with the best of hopes and wishes I feel the pain must be unimaginable.

@Clemenc0 - what a tragic thing to happen.

@Clemenc0 that's just terrible news. Poor, poor student and their family.

I'm also sorry for your DS to have to contend with this tragic news whilst doing exams.

@Clemenc0 how devastating for the family and also all his friends such as your DS. Sudden death of a young person always is so hard to process.

Very tough timing - Is your DC at C? Just if they were at O then first year exams (prelims / mods) don't count for your final degree mark- others will know about how C works. May reduce the stress if you know.

@pantjog tech difficulties are the pits - when you've done the work but can't get it into the system - setting up gmail accounts all sounds a bit Heath Robinson.

My DC1 had problems last year with the formatting of his Prelims course work and was late uploading but some of that is due to his executive disfunction - not sure I can blame his department 😁but an added challenge for people who can't manage systems. As you say pen and paper much easier as long as the dog didn't eat it!

@Juja : He is. We are unsure of the marking significance but in his case it is more that he sets high standards for himself and the self-imposed stress that can associate with that. That is best avoided as the other school contemporary to which I referred earlier took his own life. However, he is young, healthy, well-motivated and well supported by friends at C and a local relative who is much closer to him in age than we are and with whom he gets on very well.

Clemenc0 untimely death is unbelievably tragic for those close. I think almost all of my DC at Oxford had to process this either with a contemporary at their college or with someone they knew better, who wasn't simply a peer. As you rightly say, unimaginable pain for the parents, siblings and close friends. Possibly not the right time of year to say much more, as it could well be triggering for some. I hope that's not overstepping, just a very very difficult subject

What a terrible thing, for a young person to die. Losing our contemporaries always leaves its mark. It feels jarring and upsetting enough to fully grown adults with decades behind them. Much harder for a young person to take on board.

@Clemenc0 what brutal, tragic news. A terrible loss of a young life.

There are probably Oxford parents on this thread who know that there have been other tragic losses of young lives there this week. Brutal is right pantjog, just so desperately sad.

It's horrendous. DD had to process multiple losses shortly before her GCSEs. Such terribly sad news.

DS has finished his third year exams, and seems happy with how they went. The senior tutor has told all the third years to register for the college graduation day at the end of June. Those who wish to continue to Part III can only withdraw from the BA graduation once they receive confirmation that they have the required grade. Those who don't withdraw will graduate with a BA, whether or not they actually attend the ceremony.

DS seems confident that his results will be published in time to withdraw from the graduation, even with the marking and assessment boycott. I'm worried that he is now playing a game of chicken with the university for the next three weeks, albeit one he was clearly instructed by them to do. If he inadvertently graduates with a BA by default, he can't then do Part III, as he'll no longer be an undergraduate. All of his career plans require Part III.

Omg ironoaks that sounds like a huge overcomplication. Surely they want him to progress to part III too?

I'm hoping that if it comes to it, the college will be flexible about prospective Part III students withdrawing from the graduation, because the other rules are at university level and seem quite fixed.

@Ironoaks this is such a ridiculous situation for your DS and others. Surely the onus is on the university, faculty and college to do all they can so that no one, including your DS, misses our, just because of the marking boycott, which is completely beyond your DS's control? How can it be right, on any level and no matter how much anyone might sympathise with the strikers, that the innocent pawns in the game - the students - may suffer and have long-lasting consequences that affect their futures and career prospects?

DS1 (C) has just hired his graduation gown and yet I still can't see how he or anyone is going to graduate at all if they don't have a degree? I don't think it works like this. You can't be awarded a degree if you haven't had your work marked, surely? Apparently, some of the Latin wording spoken at Senate House is going to be 'altered' to reflect the fact that this isn't really a graduation ceremony at all but again, I honestly don't think students realise the full implications, nor their families. DS1 seems to be assuming it is an actual graduation when it isn't.

Given the awful mental health issues many of this cohort have suffered, through the pandemic, some will be brought down further when they realise that they're not actually going to get a proper degree at the end of all their strivings.

Hell's bells, @Ironoaks . That's a layer of complexity none of them needs in their heads. I hope the DC cope with it better than I would manage as a parent. DD is in the second year of an integrated Masters and I'm already catastrophising a year ahead of myself. I hope the university will take a pragmatic approach if mistakes are made. The situation isn't the students' fault.

I am so sorry to read about all of the turmoil for those who should be graduating - it's a travesty that this cohort, who have already suffered SO much through covid etc, should be facing this. I really, really hope that it is all resolved (somehow) and that they get the results and degrees that they have worked SO hard for. Is there an Ombudsman or some 'higher power' that can be appealed to?!

That is absolutely awful @Ironoaks and it seems like the university is making a bad situation worse. I can't imagine how stressful it must be for all the students in this situation, not to mention their parents.

All three of my eldest have exams this week in fact one day DDs 1 and 2 will be in exam schools together. I have been extremely stressed about them all they have had various struggles which I won't bore you all with but DS's report on today's exam was "not terrible" which I'm going to take as a win. DS2 also has a GCSE this week. My fingernails are telling the story.

Ah... overuse of dashes in my para above has led to bits being crossed out. Unintentional. Sorry!

DS's report on today's exam was "not terrible" which I'm going to take as a win

'Not terrible' would = major major win for several of mine pantjog. 'Car crash' coupled with an 'I mean it' tone = less good.