Is there a higher level of unhappy students at the moment?

[user73]

DS is hopefully going off to university next September but getting a bit worried about hearing so many stories of this year's cohort being unhappy. Lots of stories coming back from kids in the year above of large numbers of unsociable flat mates who just stay in their rooms looking a screens, extremely high levels of drugs amongst those who do go out, problems with accommodation (cleaning in particular), kids sticking with people they know from school, pressure to organise a second year house in the first few weeks of term, lack of teaching going on etc.

Is this normal and I'm just noticing it more because of the age of my DC or is there more than usual? Reports are from Exeter, Lancaster, Warwick, Leeds in particular.

Could it be that there problems adjusting due to the covid years or are our kids finding it harder to be independent because we do more for them? I remember being delighted to be independent and mixing with new people.

I teach at a university (not one of the ones mentioned in your post). In general, students have higher incidence of mental health issues (eg anxiety) than they did a few years ago. However - I have to say that our first year students are a great bunch! They seem to have settled in well, attendance is excellent (after 2 years of students who seemed to think that lectures was completely optional), they're a real breath of fresh air. So my experience (which is limited to one department of one uni) does not match what you've heard.

Perhaps it’s self selecting in that those who are having a great time aren’t back in their home towns at weekends already or reporting problems back through their parents who then get worried and discuss with their friends etc. I do hope so. It’s quite concerning. My BFs daughter is having all sorts of issues and another friends DS hates Exeter to the extent that he’s thinking of leaving and applying somewhere else next year.

DH is in 2nd year and very happy. She has friends at Leeds, Durham and Sheffield who are happy too.

I think it depends on your outlook to an extent. If your flatmates don't want to go out there are people on your course as another starting point or clubs and societies. Get to know friends of friends.

Initially people may stick with old school friends but branch out over time.

Yes, you do have to organise Year 2 accommodation very early. DD is living with people she gets on with but who aren't the people she goes out with. They all use the house as a base like they did Halls.

In fact, it is very similar to my experience 40 years ago!

I have been on the WIWIKAU Facebook page for the last 3 years, and I have noticed a much higher incidence of unhappy students this year.

I feel that there are too many young people who feel they should go to university because it is sold as the default option, mainly by schools, and they are getting the FOMO vibe if they don't go. They rush into it without considering all their options, when taking a gap year would be beneficial.

I also think that a lot of students just aren't ready to be away from home living independently. I'm sure that some of this reason is due to the lockdowns where the teenagers didn't have to opportunity to grow up in freedom and develop their independence.

Also, university is sold as a fun thing to do and living in halls is party central, so students leave home with unrealistic expectations.

Students from the last few years haven't sat proper full public exams, and studying for a degree comes as a shock because it is hard work.

And lastly, due to widening participation and inclusion there are many more students with extra needs who need more support who wouldn't have been able to go to university even 20 years ago. These students get put in halls with students who don't "get" why they are "different" and often treat them badly. I feel that the onus is on the universities to try and put similar young people together.

The stories of isolation and bullying I have read on WIWIKAU are heartbreaking.

I realise that this isn't the case for the majority of students, but I do think that young people should consider more carefully where and, more importantly, when to go to university if at all.

I work at one of those universities and I agree with the previous poster that while overall mental health issues are higher, things seem to be going pretty well for this year's cohort of students. After two years of hybrid teaching things are back face to face - the campus is busy, the libraries are busy, lectures are full, the gym is full, cafes are busy, the bars are busy, clubs are running trips. Students have access to the full student experience again.

If there's a group that seems to be struggling it's this year's masters students who are only here for a year, so have to hit the ground running, and who may have had the final two years of their undergrad disrupted. They seem to be struggling to gel as a cohort, but maybe because it's a different way of teaching to what they are used to, whereas the first years haven't known any different.

That said, there are issues with availability of good quality, well priced housing - there's housing but it's not necessarily good or cheap; there are three days of strikes scheduled for November; the cost of living crisis, particularly in terms of energy and food affects students too; there's the war in Ukraine and the climate crisis with COP27 currently on. So things aren't perfect and there's a lot to worry about for a group that's already had a pretty crap couple of years.

I do think the current cohort (years 2 & 3) have been badly let down due to the way some Unis dealt with Covid restrictions. My son is Year 3 at Lancaster and had a miserable first year (20/21) where the campus was like a Zombie ghost town, none of his lecturers/teaching staff set foot on campus the whole year, nor did huge numbers of support staff. Everything was email or online. Student support weren't taking phone calls (you had to email and someone would email back several days or a few weeks later!). Obviously during the actual lockdowns, fair enough, but the place was pretty much closed for most of the year, i.e. locked common rooms, clubs/societies operating online, etc. DS had a problem accessing some of the IT required and the Uni "IT clinic" of course wasn't operating in person, so again, a chain of emails spanning a few weeks with their "support" team taking several days to reply to emails. No surprise that students didn't make friends, didn't get to meet people or do the usual "social" activities. The "partying" students had their parties anyway, but for those who weren't party animals, there really wasn't anything to do except sit in their bedrooms. Campus security were pretty hot on stopping students walking around campus in groups (even if their group was within their flat, i.e. household, security would split them up!).

His year 2 was better (21/22) but still nowhere near normal. Still lots of lectures online only with the lecturer not on campus. Some of the campus shops/eateries never re-opened after covid lockdowns. Quite a few clubs/societies never re-started (no last year first years coming through to take over. DS says that most people in his lectures sit on their own and don't really know eachother, no doubt because they didn't get the opportunity to gel together in year 1 with it all being online!

Now he's in year 3, he says campus is vibrant again and only 1 of his modules is wholly online, but his year really aren't doing things together, they didn't make the friends they'd usually make in year 1, or join the clubs/societies, etc. He says the year 2 and 3 students are obvious on campus because they're generally the ones walking around on their own, or sitting alone in the library, etc. The first years (started sept 22) are the ones who are in groups, hanging out in the common rooms, etc.

So for DS at Lancaster at least, I'd say he's been pretty unhappy as have most of his flat mates and the few people he's met through his course. A lot of that is the way Lancaster treated its students, and the way most of the staff vacated campus early in 2020 and simply didn't go back until 2022!

So, on the whole, I think the new cohort (Sept 22) are having a nearly normal experience but the 2020 cohort was very badly affected and that does mean they're generally unhappier than the students before and after them.

Reading through the other replies, I wonder if some of the issues may also be caused by the wider range of experiences this year. Because I do think some students are genuinely having a great time - campus is buzzing and it's great to see. But if you're not having a great time, it's much more marked this year that you're missing out. When everything was hybrid there was less opportunity to compare.

And as staff, we only see a subset of the more engaged students. If there's lots who are mostly sitting in their rooms then we wouldn't necessarily know this unless they tell us.

Kazzyhoward

echos my DS Experience and has had significant mental impact on him which is ongoing.

he’s on a placement now, which is fully remote from home , so yet more locked away in his room.

We have a high number of MH issues in students combined with a reticence to attend classes (not necessarily connected). We have teaching staff who are making a real effort (bending over backwards despite many having covid or caring for those who do) and the students are either covid-shy or simply don't care. Assessments are generally of a lower standard too.

Ds is final year and he has struggled with his mental health throughout. Online teaching, not getting to know his course mates, living in cramped accommodation during lock downs was really hard. He is happy this year but just wants it done now and to move on with his life.

My nephew went to York in September to do maths. Lasted three weeks and is back home. The whole experience just overwhelmed him completely.
DS1 went to Nottingham last year and is fine.
Very different characters though.

Yes DS knows someone from the year above who has already left St Andrews.

Having started this year

My daughter is at one of the ones you mention, she hasn’t yet met two of her flatmates in halls because they rarely leave their room. She is a first year, with luck she has made friends on her course.

Big weed problem, not her flat thank goodness. But when I visit I’m not exaggerating the air stinks of weed, it’s quite thick in some of the corridors.

Ambulances are frequent visitors. My daughter is quite relieved she isn’t in a ‘party flat’ but she is quiet and doesn’t drink but does suffer from anxiety pretty bad.

My daughter is at one of the ones you mention, she hasn’t yet met two of her flatmates in halls because they rarely leave their room. She is a first year, with luck she has made friends on her course.

Hearing lots of stories like this. Screen addicted kids who literally keep their doors closed and don't mix

That's how my son feels too. He, too, is at Lancaster, and really hasn't enjoyed his Uni years. He just wants to get it over now.

The first year being virtually trapped in his room with nowhere to go, nothing to do, shops and cafes closed, library closed except for borrowing pre-ordered books, common rooms locked, entire blocks locked and barriered off, just having the odd walk around a virtually empty campus for exercise really affected him.

He even limited his walks around campus as the security staff were over-officious and would question students walking around as to why during the strict lockdowns (even though they were allowed out), and then again when groups of flat mates would walk around together and were told to split up by security if there were more than 6 in a group during those periods when people were only allowed out in groups of 6 or less (despite some of the campus accommodation being for up to 14/16 in a flat living together).

Then the few times he needed help/support, luckily not MH, but general things like help accessing a computer system, or advice from a tutor, or whatever, and it was all about sending an email and waiting for a reply several days later, as they weren't there to take phone calls, etc. One of his flat mates needed MH support, and again, he just got an email back saying phone or in-person support wasn't available, and just a few links to MH support webpages!

Even now in his 3rd year, he's not really "engaging" with anyone, neither staff nor course mates, and if he has queries about the work, or anything else, his first action is to google it, or ask on student forums, rather than make contact with teaching or support staff. He's never even met his "personal tutor" who wasn't on campus for the first two years "due to covid", so the limited communication was by email.

I think he'll be pleased to get his degree and forget about the last 3 years, which is a great shame when we know so many people who had great Uni experiences during "normal" times.

Yes it's been tough for them. So much geared towards online. Difficult to meet people in your course so you are at the mercy of finding friends elsewhere. Hard to know how/ who to contact too.

My heart really goes out to the older years. They’ve had a very compromised experience. Insult added to injury is the frequent comment that TAGs meant everyone got an A*.

My own DD is now settled at uni, after a bumpy start. Freshers’ week was cancelled to mourn the Queen, she got expensive halls on the edge of town that were not her preference. Lots of little things making it harder to meet people. She has started to meet like minded people and seems happy.

But soon, she will have to start stressing about housing for next year which is very constrained. Many uni towns rely on private renting which is going over to air b&bs. It’s an extra stress.

Depends so much on the kids. Mine were both at university through covid so a lot of staying in, dd since restarted and goes out more.

Just an anecdotal report, I know personally of a lot of drop outs from Warwick due to mental health. It's a coincidence in the sense that they don't know each other, from different aspects of my life but by chance all dropped out for the same reasons .

DD has settled well, she says she’s been very lucky with her flat, they all get on really well. This has been a big relief and made a lot of difference. She has said though that other flats not so good and some people are struggling a bit which isn’t good.

2 of her friends have changed uni for year 2 as they weren’t happy.

I feel so sorry for the cohort who were freshers in 20/21. It must have been soul destroying to be trapped in your room for most of the year and awful to hear things weren't much better last year with lots of things still online. I think experiences have varied depending on subject.

My DS is now in year 2 at Lancaster and his experience couldn't have been more different to some of those described on this thread. He got on really well with all his flat mates in halls, and had as he had in person lessons (engineering) made friends on his course too. He also joined a college sporting society which has regular training sessions and matches.

He's now living off campus with his flat mates from last year and they're all having a great time and love Lancaster. Maybe he was just lucky. Really sad to hear that hasn't been everyone's experience.

I do think a lot of it is down to luck of the draw with your first year flat mates. If you click that's great, but it can be really hard if not (which was my own experience decades ago!)

Two at university, those who are interested in sport seem to have it a lot easier, both of mine have made friends but for quiet or not into clubbing it can be difficult. My DD in particular tried lots of societies that have been useless for meeting people as they switch to online or cancelled at last minute, she is also doing a degree that really should be offered fully online with the amount time spent at university. Realistically she only need to be there Monday morning and Tuesday and Tuesday optional for online. Luckily she made friends in her flat but it not the experience she was expecting.

There was someone in my brother's halls back at the end of the 1970s who rarely came out of his rooms and didn't mix with anyone - that was before internet, mobile phones, etc

I suspect this perception is a bit like reading the Relationships board on here and concluding that everyone in life is miserable and in awful relationships.

When my youngest started, in the midst of covid lockdowns, the papers/ media / forums were screaming that all students were having a terrible time, so I started asking people - I asked my dc about people they knew (at Universities across the country).... I asked friends about their dc....I asked young people I knew through some volunteering I do.... I asked colleagues about their dc. In total, 1 out of 59 people was the only one not having a great time. Yes, I know it is anecdotal, but the point is, none of those people pop up on threads or in articles saying "everything is great, thanks" so they slip from your radar.

I think that, Yes, there have always been people that didn't settle.
There is an issue that a lot of people are now going to university with strange expectations.
There is an issue that there are too many parents too involved in the miniature of their adult dcs' lives and are catastrophising situations that students have always got in to and that previously they dealt with themselves and never told their parents about.

looking At my dd and her friends only one is unhappy. And it’s down to housing. They seem to have an odd system. She has ended up in an expensive area, quite far away from the uni in a place that’s not that pleasant with people in year 3 that don’t seem interested in socialising with a first year. Thats York.

Dd is in private halls and loves it and has already booked for next year. As has one of her flatmates. They are sharing again next year. Dd isn’t incredibly sociable. So 2 flat mates in plenty for her and she has made friends on her course. Her flatmates are in year 2 and stayed in the Uni halls last year and said it was awful.

Her other 2 friends are really happy as well.

That said, dd says a few people have dropped off her course and gone home. But the people she knows who have left, weren’t that interested in the course even in the first few weeks. She got the impression they were there because their parents wanted them doing that course. She says it is intense but no more intense than they said it was at open days. I attended 2 open days for students and parents and it did seem that lot of parents more enthusiastic about the subject than the child who had applied.

This is entirely anecdotal, of course. But I imagine it’s a mix of a lot of issues. Not just one thing.

its hard to see other peoples loneliness, especially if on the outside it looks like the person has a friendship group. A group brought together by circumstances and people doing whatever it takes to fit in. People also will say just about anything rather than say they have no friends. It’s still very much a stigma