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Higher education

Talk to other parents whose children are preparing for university on our Higher Education forum.

Original poster

Weekly budget at uni

221 replies

1Wanda1 · 13/11/2022 08:30

How much does your child have to spend per week AFTER rent and bills?

DS and DD both have a weekly spending budget of around £65. Both in unis outside London. DD is sticking to this no problem. DS keeps overspending, has maxed out the overdraft, now doesn't have enough money to pay December rent, and the only way he'll be able to do so is if we bail him out (again).

He doesn't seem to think anything is wrong, as says he hasn't been living extravagantly and only goes out once a week and it's just "cost of living". I think that £65 a week is plenty to buy food and a few drinks.

He's looking for a job but that's not really the point. He thinks I'm really unreasonable and mean and I don't know how to get him to budget. Is £65 enough or am I deluded?

OP posts:
user73 · 15/11/2022 21:24

£65 is a lot less than £100 though

user73 · 15/11/2022 21:26

but i think you're wrong in your statement to him that most people survive on less than £100. That would be less than the max loan and the max loan is not always expected to be enough.

Comefromaway · 15/11/2022 21:28

Less than £100 per week is not less than the maximum lan in many cases though.

My niece is on minimum loan and she gets given £50 per week after rent is paid.

Comefromaway · 15/11/2022 21:31

It is 3 years ago now but when dd lived in accommodation with meals included she got £35 per week for everything else.

Original poster
1Wanda1 · 15/11/2022 21:31

user73 · 15/11/2022 21:24

£65 is a lot less than £100 though

He had £100 a week in first year PLUS his £4K savings. He also spent £1k overdraft. Then refused to work over the summer. As a result he has started year 2 in a deficit, as well as having more expensive rent in year 2.

OP posts:
Original poster
1Wanda1 · 15/11/2022 21:34

user73 · 15/11/2022 21:26

but i think you're wrong in your statement to him that most people survive on less than £100. That would be less than the max loan and the max loan is not always expected to be enough.

The max loan is for students with the lowest household incomes. I assume that those families are not in a position to kit out their kids with everything they need at the start of uni, plus sending them back each term with a £200 food shop, a couple of weeks' worth of frozen home cooked meals, pay for club memberships and travel home, etc.

OP posts:
Comefromaway · 15/11/2022 21:37

Precisely Wanda. Ds’s friend is currently working 3 jobs to try and kit himself out for Uni next year. That is if he doesn’t have to help his mum pay the gas and electric bill again this winter.

AltheaVestr1t · 15/11/2022 21:48

I don't want to wade into a bunfight here, but I have no idea why the OP is getting such a hard time...her DS had halls paid and 9k of maintenance money over the year which adds up to £750 a month, this is a huge amount and far more than he needs! He's in debt, won't get a summer job and won't let his parents sort out his finances. Short of ensuring that he doesn't starve, I don't think I'd be inclined to send him more of my hard earned cash for him to waste either.

ArcticSkewer · 15/11/2022 22:03

AltheaVestr1t · 15/11/2022 21:48

I don't want to wade into a bunfight here, but I have no idea why the OP is getting such a hard time...her DS had halls paid and 9k of maintenance money over the year which adds up to £750 a month, this is a huge amount and far more than he needs! He's in debt, won't get a summer job and won't let his parents sort out his finances. Short of ensuring that he doesn't starve, I don't think I'd be inclined to send him more of my hard earned cash for him to waste either.

Because the figures you quote are not what she's giving him.

He gets less per year than students on a full maintenance lian would get.

Op, everyone I know with kids on full maintenance loan still does their best to support their child with train fare home, food shop on arrival etc. I know you get people on here posting about not being able to afford to, but all my son's friends, basically, are on full maintenance loan and all their families help where they can. Even the care leavers got that from their long term foster carers.

Where I would not support him is on his attitude to work, particularly in the holidays. There should be plenty of jobs near his uni at Xmas, perhaps he should stay and work?

AltheaVestr1t · 15/11/2022 22:07

@ArcticSkewer he started the year with £4k savings! That more than made up for the £1500 difference between the OPs contribution and the maximum loan. So he had £2.5k more than the maximum. Unless you are arguing that a students earnings should be considered pin money and that parents should be wholly responsible for their upkeep? This doesn't seem like an attitude calculated to foster independence and a responsible attitude in a young adult.

user73 · 15/11/2022 22:08

AltheaVestr1t · 15/11/2022 21:48

I don't want to wade into a bunfight here, but I have no idea why the OP is getting such a hard time...her DS had halls paid and 9k of maintenance money over the year which adds up to £750 a month, this is a huge amount and far more than he needs! He's in debt, won't get a summer job and won't let his parents sort out his finances. Short of ensuring that he doesn't starve, I don't think I'd be inclined to send him more of my hard earned cash for him to waste either.

That isn’t what he’s getting at all. You’ve misunderstood

he’s getting less than the government expect him to get through his combination of loan and parental contribution. He’s £1500 a year short

hes used all of his savings. Yes he could have made his savings stretch further but many kids wouldn’t have had that £4k of their own savings.

he doesn’t sound like he’s scrimping and saving but at the same time he’s between £1500 and £3500 per year short compared to what those on full loan will have.

user73 · 15/11/2022 22:10

AltheaVestr1t · 15/11/2022 22:07

@ArcticSkewer he started the year with £4k savings! That more than made up for the £1500 difference between the OPs contribution and the maximum loan. So he had £2.5k more than the maximum. Unless you are arguing that a students earnings should be considered pin money and that parents should be wholly responsible for their upkeep? This doesn't seem like an attitude calculated to foster independence and a responsible attitude in a young adult.

Even if he used all of his savings only to top up to the max loan he’d be short over the course of the three years.

user1487194234 · 15/11/2022 22:10

We give our DC £1100 a month to cover everything
Rent is £550/600
No loans
Also pay random things like phones,contact lenses

Comefromaway · 15/11/2022 22:11

But he’s getting exactly the same amount as my Ds who is getting the exact amount of the full maintenance loan. And the same amount as his sibling who is getting the full loan amount. It so happens his rent this year is a lot cheaper so op has been able to save a bit of money.

AltheaVestr1t · 15/11/2022 22:11

He could very easily have worked in the summer full time for 8 weeks and saved £1-2k. He has refused to work and now he's suffering the consequences. The OP is trying to teach him to grow up and take responsibility, which is obviously very necessary considering his actions.

Comefromaway · 15/11/2022 22:13

no allowance is made for having two at uni at the same time so OP is probably having to really economise to be able to support them both.

ArcticSkewer · 15/11/2022 22:14

AltheaVestr1t · 15/11/2022 22:07

@ArcticSkewer he started the year with £4k savings! That more than made up for the £1500 difference between the OPs contribution and the maximum loan. So he had £2.5k more than the maximum. Unless you are arguing that a students earnings should be considered pin money and that parents should be wholly responsible for their upkeep? This doesn't seem like an attitude calculated to foster independence and a responsible attitude in a young adult.

His savings.

Not his parents savings.

And last year not this year.

So last year he was on about the same as the other students on full maintenance plus bursary (although I looked up Oxford, they get £5k) if we include his own £4k savings contributions but who knows, maybe those other students had a few k savings as well - mine had over £1k just in child trust fund government contributions.

This year, he has less.

He should work. Equally, op is hardly being over-generous as she isn't actually giving him the amount she is supposed to, which tops up to the max maintenance loan. Even if he was working, she's not supposed to point to that as her contribution!

user73 · 15/11/2022 22:19

Comefromaway · 15/11/2022 22:11

But he’s getting exactly the same amount as my Ds who is getting the exact amount of the full maintenance loan. And the same amount as his sibling who is getting the full loan amount. It so happens his rent this year is a lot cheaper so op has been able to save a bit of money.

He isn’t getting the same as the full loan. He’s getting £4500 loan plus £3500 parental contribution (according to the ops earlier post)He’s actually £1700 short

like it or not the government expects parents earning more than £60k to pay at least £5k a year

ArcticSkewer · 15/11/2022 22:22

Comefromaway · 15/11/2022 22:11

But he’s getting exactly the same amount as my Ds who is getting the exact amount of the full maintenance loan. And the same amount as his sibling who is getting the full loan amount. It so happens his rent this year is a lot cheaper so op has been able to save a bit of money.

He gets £4500 loan plus £3700 parental contribution.

That is not a maximum student loan amount for a student not living at home.

user73 · 15/11/2022 22:23

ArcticSkewer · 15/11/2022 22:22

He gets £4500 loan plus £3700 parental contribution.

That is not a maximum student loan amount for a student not living at home.

Show quote history

Plus in the earlier post the OP said he gets £4500 loan plus £3500 parental contribution. That was then changed to £3700.

hes £1700 short.

gogohmm · 15/11/2022 22:23

Dd has around £25, she has to earn anything extra (she earns about £25 a week but saves that to visit her bf)

Comefromaway · 15/11/2022 22:26

Sigh. You are not getting it.

user73 · 15/11/2022 22:28

Anyway I’m out. The OP is convinced she’s right. I think she should be contributing the full parental contribution or should have made it crystal clear to her son that despite being in a highly paid job, she couldn’t afford to support him through university and he would need to find more than £5k in order to attend.

ArcticSkewer · 15/11/2022 22:29

user73 · 15/11/2022 22:23

Plus in the earlier post the OP said he gets £4500 loan plus £3500 parental contribution. That was then changed to £3700.

hes £1700 short.

Show quote history

I'd think if other students get the bursary (and perhaps they don't at his uni? Do they, op?) then he may well have £3.7k less than many of his peers. It may be that he just hasn't really twigged that he can't spend like everyone else does as he is the relatively 'poor' one.

I would say in any case his complaint that other parents pay more would be true as they would be meeting the max student loan with that additional £1.7k if nothing else.

That's now something he needs to come to terms with. A xmas job near uni is probably his best bet

italuo · 15/11/2022 22:48

What is his dad contributing?