Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Higher education

Talk to other parents whose children are preparing for university on our Higher Education forum.

Original poster

University 2019/20 intake: next steps (some still students but many now graduates)

391 replies

LouisCatorze · 08/09/2022 17:46

Previous thread

OP posts:
simbobs · 04/12/2022 15:37

@bigTillyMint yes, exactly this. He doesn't seem to have learned how to pace himself properly at all, then it is panic stations. His course is modular.

VanCleefArpels · 04/12/2022 15:50

@bigTillyMint yes a few old school friends back home and she gets on really well with a few of her colleagues who don’t live too far away. she also has a hobby that she could take up locally but just hasn’t so far because of the travelling

bigTillyMint · 04/12/2022 16:04

I guess it’s hard to move on from the excitement of uni, especially when friends are still there. And with Covid having wrecked their experience (so not the proper full 3 years)

RampantIvy · 04/12/2022 17:54

Benjispruce4 · 04/12/2022 14:50

@VanCleefArpels if DD hasn’t moved to London with uni friends, she would be doing the same. There is nobody here to socialise with!

There are very few people for DD to socialise with at home as well, as most of her old friends have moved on or moved away.

Shimy · 08/12/2022 19:25

@bigTillyMint You're so right about moving on from the excitement of uni compounded by the impact of the pandemic on their 1st and 2nd yr experience. DS said he is enjoying this yr so much more than his first 2 yrs and seems to be socializing a lot. He hardly did any societies in his first yr and now seems really active.

@simbobs I've just seen your well wishes re: ds, thanks very much. I hope your ds manages to settle into a routine that will utilise his time well and minimise distractions, he sounds very my like my ds2 who has adhd, who wants to do everything all at once and struggles to prioritise and then gets overwhelmed and panics. This is Xmas break is an opportunity for them take a break from it all and recharge.

simbobs · 08/12/2022 23:12

Thanks @shimy. DS popped home this afternoon to chat through one of his assignments with DH. He just wanted a sanity check and he is in better shape than we thought, though he has almost impossible deadlines and some social and work commitments that he is reluctant to lose. It made me wish that he would stay and work from here as I miss him. We have hardly seen him this year, and when he is in a couple we hardly see him alone. Fingers crossed he gets the work done.

Shimy · 19/12/2022 23:49

@simbobs I'm finding more and more that sometimes they don't realise how distressed they sound when they call home. I found times when DS has said he is struggling, fed up when he was doing his A'levels, then he comes home and is all surprised how worried we are. Is he going to come home at some point during this break even just for one night so you can all catch up? I know this isn't a popular view on here but I do think one needs to point out to them sometimes that having a GF/BF does not mean abandoning your own family especially at a time like Xmas? that is not being clingy as a parent as some would view it's teaching them empathy and how to prioritise relationships in their lives as they mature.

simbobs · 20/12/2022 00:15

@Shimy , all good points. He did get all his assignments in on time, and actually worked harder than he ever has. His gf has been a good influence on him, I think, and he sees that the end is in sight. He will be home for Christmas, and might even make his DSis birthday. How long he will stay, and how much we will see him is another matter. We have a family wedding in the New Year which he will attend, but we have only just realised that he has an exam a couple of days later. Just a few more months and it will all be over. His student experience has been a far cry from mine.

Original poster
LouisCatorze · 20/12/2022 17:48

Just popping in to say Merry Christmas to everyone and their young people, particularly those now in their final year.

DS's g/f has finally completed her Masters dissertation so suspect we may be having him at home less going forward. He went down to see her for the weekend and has now opted to stay until just before Christmas! So much for having him around to help with last-minute preparations.

OP posts:
Benjispruce4 · 20/12/2022 18:42

Merry Christmas to you all too! DD should be home by train on Friday evening but just until 28th .

icanbewhatiwant · 20/12/2022 20:43

Yes merry Christmas all. Just over 2 weeks and ds1 will be going to NZ for a year. Seems weird that we won't see him at all. Ds2 is home from university, his first simester went quickly. Ds3 on half term. So a full house. Of course they are all in their rooms most of the time, so may as well just be DH and me home.

RampantIvy · 20/12/2022 22:11

Merry Christmas everyone. DD's work is insanely busy. There are so many ill people at the moment and the shortages of some drugs is causing problems, but the main issue is a couple of the staff are so incompetent it is doubling the workload for everyone else.

The pharmacy student gets everything wrong. All prescriptions are checked anyway, but everything she does has to be done again. She is a third year pharmacy student and she doesn’t even know the difference between an orodispersible tablet and a gastro resistant tablet which is worrying. DD did just one pharmacy module during her degree and knows more than the pharmacy student!

I am so proud of DD’s work ethic. She has worked over for no extra pay to complete patients’ mediboxes, and went in early today to complete some tasks before they opened and couldn’t be interrupted by customers.

DD will be getting a late train back on Friday then has to be back in Newcastle on the 28th.

VanCleefArpels · 21/12/2022 07:54

DD had her first office Christmas shindig! I don’t think there’s a page in the red book for that milestone 😉

RampantIvy · 21/12/2022 08:24
Grin I doubt it. DD had hers a couple of weeks ago and enjoyed it.
Benjispruce4 · 21/12/2022 08:31

Lost my post but that’s funny @VanCleefArpels !
Glad your Dd is doing well @RampantIvy and thank god prescriptions are checked!

Original poster
LouisCatorze · 21/12/2022 08:57

It doesn't really sound as if that pharmacy student has a career in the field ahead of her :-(. Well done to your DD for going over and above to delivery a great service @RampantIvy .

Good to hear that some of our young people have been enjoying one of their work world rites of passage, the office Christmas do.

@icanbewhatiwant is your DS1 still being difficult? Hopefully as his NZ departure date looms, he may be more relaxed and nostalgically reflective about family life. He may appreciate everyone more when he's not in your immediate orbit. It will be a great adventure for him.

OP posts:
bigTillyMint · 21/12/2022 11:54

Merry Christmas to you all!

@icanbewhatiwant, how exciting for your DS - NZ is a great place, if a bit far flung!

@RampantIvy, well done to your DD! Sadly there are poor/incompetent workers in every line of work, as my DD has found out this year. And bosses are amazed at how fast the competent ones are doing tasks that take the less competent all day….

@VanCleefArpels, yes, it’s definitely a milestone! DD had two last week. She has learned not to agree to organise a work do in future!

@Benjispruce4, lovely to get your DD home over Christmas, though I am quite envious of those who don’t have DC living back with them permanently!
@LouisCatorze, make the most of the breather 😉😀

simbobs · 21/12/2022 12:01

Merry Christmas to all! I hope that your DC have a chance to rest and take stock over the festive season (unless they are travelling the world). My DS is coming home tomorrow but we have just realised that he left his large wheeled bag here at some point and has nothing in which to pack what he needs to bring, so I have volunteered DH to go and pick him up. I think I have done more than enough over the last couple of years. No idea how long he is staying, and he baulked at the notion that he still needs to take a covid test before he can cross the threshold. He mentioned that he was coughing at work so I think it necessary as we have to shield DD. I will be gutted if it is positive...

RampantIvy · 21/12/2022 13:03

How is your DD @simbobs? Is there any sign of improvement?

simbobs · 21/12/2022 13:13

@RampantIvy, thanks for asking. Sadly not. She has just got worse and is now fully bedbound apart from going to the bathroom. I'm glad to see that this hasn't happened to your DD. We have registered her with our GP now as we weren't getting much from the specialist services in the North East, and she could do with a doctor coming out to see her.

RampantIvy · 21/12/2022 13:18

Oh no @simbobs. I really hope she manages to be seen by someone who can help her. My thoughts are with you Flowers

Benjispruce4 · 21/12/2022 13:55

So sorry to hear that @simbobs. I really hope there’s somebody who can help her improve.
On the subject of incompetence at work, DD2 is amazed at the laziness of some on her team. She can see the work rate of others online and some others her age have divulged to her that they often pretend their screens aren’t working to get out of wfh for an hour. I think this is why the bank recruit temps and then offer permanent roles to those that are competent.

icanbewhatiwant · 21/12/2022 16:47

@simbobs sorry to hear that. I hope dd gets the help she needs.

@LouisCatorze Ds isn't quite so bad tempered now he's not working. He's just hanging about doing nothing. He still makes mess in the bathroom, mess in the kitchen etc. if we ask him to clear up he denies it being his and asks why we pick on him. I have given up saying anything. It will be strange when he's gone and when ds2 returns to Sussex, just the 3 of us left.

bigTillyMint · 22/12/2022 08:44

@simbobs, so sorry to hear about your DD - I hope you can get better professional support.

simbobs · 22/12/2022 09:00

Thank you all for your words of support re DD.
In other news DS doesn't have covid but feels really ill, and although he is meant to be working right now he is way too poorly, just got this fluey cold, by the sound of it. I'm torn because I want him home, cared for and properly rested, but know that he will give it to me - I always catch things from him, never anyone else, and I have DD to consider. I think this could be a challenging Christmas.