OR 2022 - We are no longer rejects. We are parents of fabulous offspring who will do wonderful things

[TangoWhiskyAlphaTango]

Wonderful tongue in cheek title thread by he words of @ eightytwenty.

Soooooo our thread started out back in March 2022 when our dc were Oxbridge wannabes. After thousands of posts by their nervous Mums, nail biting, discussing applications, grades, will they get to interview won't they, debates such as private vrs state, the Scottish system, then some got rejected and some had interviews and entrance assessments then much more nail biting and eating and drinking a lot and a loooong wait over Xmas 2021 the remainders were then rejected. Then more nail biting for offers to come in from the competitive Unis they had applied to with some ending up with only one or two options - our Covid Kids had it tough.

Finally May came and their actual A-levels then the brutal wait for results. I don't think I can recall any of our DC not getting their first choice?

Lots of DC off to top Unis and achieving the best grades in the land. My DD is off to Bath to do Politics and IR and I am incredibly proud of her, she is a grafter not naturally super clever but loves to learn and god I am going to miss her but she is ready and so I happy for her 😥

So please carry on our lovely supportive thread so we can see where their journeys take them.

TWAT x

@TangoWhiskyAlphaTango S1 isn't a drinker or a clubber (one less thing for me to fret over) but he went to the pub with his flatmates last night & is going to the quiz tonight too. Tell her to look out for a lad with curly hair, round glasses & a geordie accent!

Evening all!

Been chatting quite a bit on WA to DD, I saw on Instagram she was at the club last night and she said they (house) are going to the same place (SU place I think) tonight. Everything seems fine, she sent a list of stuff she needs this morning so has a mahoosive Amazon parcel arriving tomorrow, including a pillow as the one which came with the Bath uni store is a sad specimen of flat foam. We tried to get one in M&S but they had not one pillow left.

She chose some option things today- unimpressed with the choices but apparently there's another list on Thursday that she might be able to get into.

@TangoWhiskyAlphaTango thank you for thinking of me lovely, it was easier than I imagined leaving- think it is definitely true that last week was worse.

@MillicentFaucet good to hear that Ds is settling.

I think we can all start to relax a bit!

@TangoWhiskyAlphaTango @MillicentFaucet DS was talking about the quiz night too, he was pretty keen although whether he actually ended up there is another matter 🤷‍♀️ His gf was keen so chances are more likely.

He is not into clubbing so has avoided the club nights.

Tango yes DS’s gf has a very small room in Westwood but it is bigger than DS’s!! He doesn’t care too much though so all is fine.

DS is not very communicative but seems to be very happy so far.

We went to the much feted Rose and Crown in Hinton Charterhouse for lunch on Sunday which is recommended to stay in on WIWIKAU. It was nice for Sunday lunch but too far out I think for us to stay in when we visit. I think we will cancel our planned stay in a month and book somewhere in the city centre.

The Architect and the Botanist both looked interesting. We ended up eating in Côte on Saturday which was very nice but not outstanding.

I can recommend both The Scallop Shell (award winning fish and chips as well as much fancier fishy things) and The Oven for real Neapolitan pizza. We ate in both at the weekend and both were excellent.
I'm planning on coming over when they finish for Christmas, ostensibly to pick her up but also to see Bath at Christmas and shop. (I am an unapologetic Christmasholic and leave my Christmas tablecloth on all year as a form of denial) There will be Christmas markets! My friend's daughter is singing at them. I may pull in a weekend between now and then. Fingers crossed.

Not sure what DS been doing, don’t think he did much last night but he has been talking to his flatmates so am pleased with that. Taking note of the restaurants, we are about an hour away or 45 mins by train so will be going over at some point.

@MillicentFaucet I let her know! It seems there are loads of things on so even if not a drinker there is hopefully plenty for them to get involved in.

Shall we all meet up in Bath for a Christmas soiree?! I am visiting end of October with DS (this is to try and motivate him too as he is applying to Uni next year - not Bath but if he sees DD happy it will help) and then may go for the Christmas markets too. Although @Geamhradh I am the opposite I am afraid, I loathe Christmas - I am the Grinch! That said Bath is absolutely stunning that time of year.

dd text me last night and said "I am having sooooo much fun", I can't really ask for anything else can I? I mean I hoped she may miss me just a teeny bit in a selfish way 😆I do wonder how they will feel next week when the academic part starts and they have to think of getting their heads back down, I just hope she remains buoyant!

@TangoWhiskyAlphaTango how wonderful to get the "I am having sooooo much fun" text, you really can't ask for anything more 😀

DS is not a drinker or clubber either but after an initial wobble seems to have found plenty to do! Don't know about any restaurants, but was really impressed with the Real Italian Ice Cream Co near the abbey.

Lovely to hear all the fresher's stories- I'm so glad they're all settling in in their own way.

DS is 2nd week in and the work piles in. He's been told, as a rough guide, for every hour in class he should be working 3 hours on his own additionally. He does seem to have reading for every class/ tutorial/ lab and 'core skill' tests weekly (not sure if that's a Mathmos thing?!). He's coping well, but it's intense.

@TangoWhiskyAlphaTango Brilliant idea to bring DS to the university on your next trip.
DD (14urs) came with us when we dropped off DS and this evening she’s been pouring over the Guardian’s university guide for Warwick courses! She loved the look of the place and the idea of complete independence within a safe bubble. Wish DS had had same experience and motivation.

@Puffalicious DD went to an introductory lecture today for her subject and was told they should be putting in around 8 hours per day overall - she was outraged 😂I think she is going to find it tough to adjust again and I waiting for the phone call next week from her . She gets into what we lovingly call "a tizz" where she has a cry, states she can't cope and then cracks on. with the work a hand!

@threestars Yes nothing like getting them motivated early on. DS is looking mainly at Liverpool & Cardiff for Computer Science, I am taking him to Liverpools open day in a few weeks (only did it earlier this year with DD).

DD face timed me today and she looked absolutely knackered as she had to be in the lecture for 8.30am. Lovely to see her face though and she was telling me all her flat get on really well. She had so many worries over not fitting in and making friends, fearing Bath would be full of rich kids but it isnt the case at all, or if they are rich she cannot tell. They seem like a lovely bunch and they are even keeping their kitchen clean - shocker!!

I am not missing her half as much as i thought I would I am just really happy that she is happy. Hope all the other lovely DC are settling into all now and finding their groove.

@TangoWhiskyAlphaTango 8 hours per day? That will explain why DS had a little wobble today (different subject, but I bet they tell them all that)

I just scuttled off to say to DD "mini Tango went to a lecture at 8.30 this morning, you didn't mention it, DO NOT TELL ME YOU MISSED IT" (She didn't, and I need to chill )

Today is my first full day back in Italy and I was fully expecting to sob all day. I didn't. I had a lovely day eating my M&S goodies from the airport and watching The Suspect. I mopped DD's floor and pondered how much fun I'm going to have sorting her den out once and for all.

Have all the Bath students done the GP registration thing? Last week we printed it all out as that seemed to be the only option but when I looked today it's online so she did it like that.

Was sorry to hear that one of the girls DD had been chatting to prior to moving in has left already and gone home. I know I'd be "come back, jack it in, it doesn't matter" if it was mine, so I'm never going to say "she should have given it more time" (though obviously she should)

Are all the ORs moved in now? I think Lancaster is this weekend?

Sorry to hear someone has gone home already.

DS called for the first time today and we chatted for half an hour. It was lovely to hear from him, he’s getting on well with all his housemates, describes them as lovely. Thankfully him and his girlfriend are doing lots separately with their own housemates and course mates so that slight concern was unfounded. He’s joined several sports clubs. He just sounded really happy, it was really lovely.

DS’s timetable is pretty much full time. He has Weds afternoons off as everyone does but otherwise he only gets every third Thursday afternoon off. He finishes at 6 on Tuesdays and Fridays. Hopefully the more time he has in lectures/ labs means that he will have less to do outside.

Will ask DS about the GP thing, I know that several of them went down there a few days ago but not sure what happened and I forgot to ask.

DS hasn’t sorted the GP thing!

Just nagged DS about the GP, thanks for the reminder.

Yes I nagged DD too about the GP and Dentist just this evening but she was having a 'bad day' as she sliced her finger whilst chopping food then burnt her fajitas whilst tending to her finger, then tried to wash her clothes but some were still wet and some dry.....poor love is finding out what its like to be independent! She had to pop to the campus shop for some supplies and was OUTRAGED to have spent £7 on a few items. Made me laugh as she often walks up to mini Sainsburys with me and loads my basket with crap stuff without a second thought!

@Geamhradh That is a shame to jack it in so soon, there must have been some pretty big doubts initially because they cant possibly know this early if it is for them or not. I would be really gutted if DD came home so soon. Glad to hear you are home safely and that you arent too upset x

@278Newnames Nice to hear you DS is making friends away from his gf. My DS was going out with a girl for a couple of years (until she broke his heart earlier this year) and they were always talking about going to the same Uni. I was internally really hoping they wouldnt as I was worried they would be joined at the hip forever. DD boyfriend is at Manchester and she misses him massively it will be interesting to see if they can ride these years out and stay together.

@TangoWhiskyAlphaTango we are fortunate in a way that DS didn’t start going out with his gf until a few months ago. They sat next to each other in A level chemistry for two years so know each other pretty well but have only recently got together. It meant that neither of them picked universities for the other which is a lot easier place to be. They seem very well suited but who knows what will happen. We did reiterate to both of them the importance of having all their own friends in case things didn’t work out.

i have told DS to stay with the dentist at home, he has an NHS slot which is like gold dust so I wanted to keep it. Fortunately he hasn’t been to the GP for years but I wanted him to register there just in case. 30 yrs ago when I went the medical centre was really good!!

DS was outraged at a wash costing £2.80, I thought that was quite good but he has some cost of living learning to do! He tells me he has spent less than £100 so far which isn’t bad for freshers. They have come to an arrangement to walk into town then get the bus back up the hill which seems a decent compromise 😊

That said about girlfriends DS1’s gf is 2hrs away at uni. He is doing an apprenticeship locally. They have managed well for about 18 months. Although I think they may be each other’s “one” so fingers crossed 🤞 🤞🤞

Such joy in the news from you all! Such a shame to hear someone gone home already- I hope they fimd their place in the world elsewhere, and peace.

Tango the 8 hours a day is similar to DS being told you should treat it like a full-time 9-5 job. It certainly seems to be exactly like this: if he sleeps in until 10am he needs to do more hours in the evening. I don't remember my first year being like that : I did far, far too much partying ,and, as a result, far too much cramming 🙈. I remember loooooong lunches in the union and putting the world to rights on comfortable chairs!

Just posted ‘it will all be fine’ on the current applicants thread. I remember people ding the same for us and finding it reassuring.

Hope all getting on well. We had DS home for the weekend but only saw him for snippets while we worked his social life around us. Having previously lamented his lack of social life it’s really good to see him making the most of home as well as Uni.

He’s now back, head down as the work load has kicked in. Lots and lots of reading. Wonder if the BATH IR crew will find the same.

How are the rest of the St A Crew doing? @say @Stockpot @Valleyofthedollymix

That was kind of you @Eightytwenty

DD is enjoying the academics and beginning to make a few acquaintances. Her first ball was a bit of a leg down. Not her thing it seems.

Aw thanks for asking @Eightytwenty. DS is, he says, having the time of his life. Of course, I then worry he'll coming crashing down. I would hate Decembers that far north as I get SAD too and it's not as if he'll be bathed in sunshine in London in the holidays.

As far as I can tell he is doing little to no work. Am I right in thinking that nothing that you do in your first year in Scottish universities counts towards your final degree? That's what I'm being told anyway.

Interesting read messages from parents in the early weeks of them going as he's been there over a month now. I felt very flat and discombobulated when we left him as he was so wobbly. But my missing him instantly evaporated when I heard that he was having a good time. I realised that for me so much of it was anxiety about how he'd get on that once that was allayed all felt good.