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Higher education

Talk to other parents whose children are preparing for university on our Higher Education forum.

2017 seems so long ago, now .....

516 replies

Xenia · 13/05/2022 16:34

Continuation of our previous thread.

OP posts:
Decorhate · 22/10/2022 13:14

@Carriemac Dd just got her rota & is also working from 23rd to 25th. But not nights.

I’m hoping I can collect her after her shift on the 25th so we can at least see her. Will then do Christmas properly on the 26th.

I’m not sure how she will actually get to work on Christmas Day. No public transport

Needmoresleep · 22/10/2022 14:22

Decorate, London usually empties over Christmas and the streets are quiet, so depending on how far away she is, cycling might be an option. There are often more taxis than you would expect. I like London on Christmas Day. We then traditionally go to the theatre on Boxing Day. The lack of transport means it is easier to get tickets to popular productions. DS is coming over from the US so I need to think about what he might like. DD has a week left of her elective. I think she is sad it is coming to an end, though I think they are encouraging her to remain involved with the research. We are going to see “Doctors” tonight, apparently about medical ethics. Perhaps it will help her SJT performance.

bettbburg · 23/10/2022 10:02

My dd has just got a new job, she's left the NHS in favour of private medicine as she can help people better. I can't say I blame her.

bettbburg · 23/10/2022 10:03

To be clear, it's a privately funded scheme but helps people free of charge to the service users.

Xenia · 23/10/2022 10:15

Bett sounds wise. My father worked as an NHS consultant until they force you to retire at 63 (not his choice) in those days but carriedono working until age 77 virtually full time as he could sit on mental health review tribunals until age 70 (when he was doing it they threw you off at 70 - he was a psychiatrist) and then his expert witness work could continue without time limit and some private work (but not most as BUPA did not let you use a doctor over about 70) after that.

H used to lose some of his NHS salary in the 1970s because he started seeing private patients on 2 afternoons and evenings a week from our house for the first time. However given his upper tax rate was 63% with 15% on top of that for interest on savings in those days (over 80% tax rate for savings) on a relatively modest NHS salary I am not surprised he took on that bit of private work. My sibling has just retired from the NHS (at 55) and now just does private work.

Anyway I hope all the adult children on this thread continue to do well. Good luck to those applying for things including law stuff (a huge thing in our family as I am a lawyer with 4 lawyer or almost lawyer children as are plenty of their friends).

The twins are doing fine one working as my trainee (who has just had about 8 all day courses so far (compulsory for trainee) and the other for 6 months seconded to another law firm in London. One lawyer daughter (who has a baby and childcare at home home) works from my house 2 days a week to keep out of her own on working from home days so the baby is not confused and at the office on the other 3 (which is quite far away so not easily possible 5 days a week). The baby of course remains really sweet and cute and gorgeous..... I remember the twins at that age (the twin had their birthday this weekend).

Last week felt a bit much, not because of any individual person/guest but just the fact so many were there at once - twin's friend for a night (after another one was here for a week between tenancies the week before), twin plus his girl friend for 2 nights which of course is fine, daghter working here 2 days - again fine, lovely to see them all and then my older son (the one not a lawyer) was here for 2 nights as had some time off work and left yesterday morning. Even just writing who was here when and dealing with sheets and cleaning up was getting complicated. I just I run both a free airbnb and a free WeWork office.

OP posts:
Haffdonga · 24/10/2022 22:20

Good luck with the Oxbridge applications @bettbburg . Will that be your youngest off to uni?

@Carriemac hope your Boston trip is great.

Ds has just done one of his final exams which apparently started off with a run of very difficult questions which threw him a bit - he's starting to get twitchy about what and where he'll be working next year and moving away from the lovely big friendship group he's built up.

bettbburg · 25/10/2022 05:49

Haffdonga · 24/10/2022 22:20

Good luck with the Oxbridge applications @bettbburg . Will that be your youngest off to uni?

@Carriemac hope your Boston trip is great.

Ds has just done one of his final exams which apparently started off with a run of very difficult questions which threw him a bit - he's starting to get twitchy about what and where he'll be working next year and moving away from the lovely big friendship group he's built up.

Yes, my youngest. He's realistic about his chances and has an alternative he's equally happy with so if he gets in or not it's all good.

He's got two offers in and is waiting on two more.

Carriemac · 26/10/2022 11:54

Just back from New England with DD, her belated graduation trip . 'Best holiday ever' according to her . History , literature , shopping and great food - now just need to deal with the jet lag

Xenia · 11/11/2022 10:48

"Best holiday ever" sounds good. I suspect our children who started university in 2017 are just busy and there is not much for us to report on this thread. I hope everyone is doing fine. I think my twins will qualify in 2024 which might be a rather bad recession year to get a newly qualified law job but we seen to specialise in that in this family. In 1982 I had to apply to 139 firms and have 25 interviews before getting first job (never mind setting up my own firm in the 1990s crash period) and one daughter was searching in the 2008 credit crunch. So hopefully they will find something. One is supervising an intern today so I hope that goes okay.

OP posts:
RedHelenB · 11/11/2022 19:25

Xenia · 11/11/2022 10:48

"Best holiday ever" sounds good. I suspect our children who started university in 2017 are just busy and there is not much for us to report on this thread. I hope everyone is doing fine. I think my twins will qualify in 2024 which might be a rather bad recession year to get a newly qualified law job but we seen to specialise in that in this family. In 1982 I had to apply to 139 firms and have 25 interviews before getting first job (never mind setting up my own firm in the 1990s crash period) and one daughter was searching in the 2008 credit crunch. So hopefully they will find something. One is supervising an intern today so I hope that goes okay.

Checking in. Dd1 is doing really well in her foundation placement, finally found a gorgeous flat and is enjoying city living , especially now she has more disposable income
I visited her this weekend and met the practice owner who was singing her praises which made me feel very proud.

ErrolTheDragon · 11/11/2022 19:33

That's great, RedHelenB. Glad she's found somewhere nice to live and is doing well.
All quiet with DD and her BF, they've had and recovered from covid in the last few weeks.

Horsemad · 13/11/2022 17:17

Where's your DD living @RedHelenB , is it Liverpool or Chester?

DS is currently in Prague, not sure where he's going after there.

Eve · 26/11/2022 05:03

DS1 started his job end Sept along with lots of other grads who all live in and around the area so a ready made community to socialise. He’s sort of settled, doesn’t want to be here long term but getting good experience with lots of opportunity to work in different areas.

We have come to visit him - rented somewhere for 2 weeks and he’s spending evenings & weekends with us which is just lovely.

RedHelenB · 26/11/2022 09:07

Eve · 26/11/2022 05:03

DS1 started his job end Sept along with lots of other grads who all live in and around the area so a ready made community to socialise. He’s sort of settled, doesn’t want to be here long term but getting good experience with lots of opportunity to work in different areas.

We have come to visit him - rented somewhere for 2 weeks and he’s spending evenings & weekends with us which is just lovely.

That sounds lovely. Dds are back this weekend, going to get the Christmas decorations out the loft for Mr.

RedHelenB · 26/11/2022 09:08

Horsemad · 13/11/2022 17:17

Where's your DD living @RedHelenB , is it Liverpool or Chester?

DS is currently in Prague, not sure where he's going after there.

She's in Liverpool now, found herself a gorgeous flat.
Prague sounds interesting, I'd like to visit there.

RedHelenB · 26/11/2022 09:10

Carriemac · 04/10/2022 13:10

Just heard DS1 is working nights at Christmas, 23rd 24th 25th 😢
It's completely fair as he has no kids etc but first Christmas without him
And he'll be in Manchester on his own in the flat

I'm going to hate the first Christmas without all my brood. Are you planning some sort of secondary celebration when he has aone time off?

bettbburg · 26/11/2022 14:52

Good to see this still going, just catching up on the news. It's all exciting.

bettbburg · 26/11/2022 14:53

Mine has settled not far away from home. They're very busy though with work and studies.

Xenia · 26/11/2022 16:21

Sounds like everyone is doing well. I sitll have the twins living at home, although one is away in Sweden for 3 nights with friends this weekend. My niece has settled in well in Cambridge (went this term) and my other sibling's children are both at Oxbridge so the younger of the cousins are doing very well indeed.
One of my twins has his last exam ever the week after next after a 3 day finance course his twins has already done (that one passed so hopefully the other twin will pass too)..

Their friend who has been doing accountancy since 2020 when they all graduated has just had his worst exam of the 3 years with results out in January so I hope he passed that one. he has 3 years of exams against lawyers' 2 but he has been working for the whole period compared with lawyers doing post grad first and then the 2 years of training on the job.

OP posts:
bettbburg · 27/11/2022 05:05

We're going through the Oxbridge application process, my youngest has got Cambridge as one of the options.

Xenia · 27/11/2022 08:28

Good luck bettbburg for your youngest. None of my 5 tried Oxbridge and perhaps rightly thought they would not get in anyway so not worth the effort, although I would have supported them had they had a go.

(My comment above that lawyers have 2 years of exams (after first degree) is not 100% accurate as if your first degree is law, as mine was, it is one year of exams instead..... and indeed under the new SQE exam system for solicitors a bit less than 2 years for everyone)

Meanwhile my newest (3rd) grandchild remains (to me) the cutest baby on the planet and can pull herself along on her feet across a sofa now (and crawls fast). We are going to her first birthday party next weekend. Time has certainly flown by.

OP posts:
Carriemac · 27/11/2022 23:21

@RedHelenB turns out DE misread his rote and is actual off Christmas and working Boxing Day ! Hurrah 😄

RedHelenB · 28/11/2022 07:09

Carriemac · 27/11/2022 23:21

@RedHelenB turns out DE misread his rote and is actual off Christmas and working Boxing Day ! Hurrah 😄

Great news.

bettbburg · 30/11/2022 07:48

@Xenia an interview has been offered!

Needmoresleep · 30/11/2022 09:22

Congratulations!

I am so glad it is over. I miss some things about small children and teenagers, but a lot was difficult. DH suggested we would have been much better parents if we had known what we were doing.

It's a big Christmas for us, possibly the last one with everyone there. DS has about 18 months to go on his PhD but could then be anywhere in the world. Academia is fiercely competitive so though he starts applying for jobs next year (he reckons he will make about 100 applications) he might well have to do two or three more years of "post-doc" before landing something. DD is having a relaxed final year as they sat their final exams last summer. Just as well with two foundation years coming up. She spent her two months elective working as a research assistant. It turned out to be brilliant, exactly the area of medicine she is interested in, and she should get her name on a paper. They have said that if she wants to take an academic PhD she should let them know. In sixth form she was undecided between medical engineering and medicine, and so it continues.

She has more or less decided to head for somewhere relatively rural for her F1/F2. Feedback from friends who made it to London teaching hospitals is that things are chaotic (presumably exacerbated by Covid) and that there is little time for teaching. The allocation system is also pretty randomised, and I think it helps that she can be certain she will get what she wants. She is likely to want to return to London eventually so thinks the next two years will be a chance to do something different. She has also found a cheap sublet in Bristol. The idea had been to save money by living in free placement accommodation, but her friends are scattered all over and it was pretty grim spending weekends alone. Other friends are picking the same safe choice F1/F2 so they should all end up together, avoiding the risk of spending two years working hard shifts without a nearby support group.

One of my tenants, just slightly older than DC, comes from Russia though now has British citizenship and was quite gloomy about again not being able to go home for Christmas, so I issued a random invitation for her to join us. I assured her that there was no commitment and that if she got a better offer she could stand us down, so was surprised at how pleased she seemed to be. DDs reaction was "Didn't you warn her that we are all mad". Its good though, as it is a reason to really make an effort. We are also lending my mum's flat to my Ukrainian tenants, their parents having fled first Crimea, and then Kyiv, with just a suitcase, having to start yet again aged 60. The mother now has a job and he is well on his way, from nothing, to reaching the standard required that will allow him to work for the NHS. They previously held very senior positions which they won't be able to achieve here, but it is a start. Even with the people I know about there are a lot of people living in their small terrace house, made worse by wfh, so again they seem to like the idea of a break. Our kids, having made it through Covid, are entering adulthood in such an uncertain world.

I hope everyone has a great Christmas, whether on 25th or not.