Oxford and Cambridge current students discussion thread

[sandybayley]

Starting a new one as we filled it up!

Can't believe DS1 will be home in 2 weeks. Must remember to adjust the Ocado shop for when he's back. I suspect we may end up with a few days of his favourite meals 😊

Thanks for all these thoughts everyone. When I told DH, he fell about laughing - DH doesn't get out much - but we both think the lad isn't really suited to medicine. Anyway as it's half term I've been trying to remove excess crap from my house and found DD2's Higher Ed handbook (pamphlet is a better description) from school from 3 years ago. There are some good websites listed and a link to the BMA's how to get into medicine.

I have put all these together in a friendly email to friend and her DS so they can look together. He had no idea about doing anything in support of his application and was faintly horrified when I suggested volunteering at a vaccine centre, so perhaps the penny will drop. He has organisation issues, but mum's solution is to micro-manage everything. Yes, it gets things done in the short-term, but doesn't help your kids to learn. At nearly 17, he is getting too old for her to be asking the sort of things my primary kids at school do with one reminder. Ideally, he needs to learn to stand on his own 2 feet, learn to cook, sort out his own sports gear etc but sad to say, I don't see that happening. Oh well, I've done my good deed for the week so now I'm going to make the most of DH being out at work for the 4th time in 5.5 months and watch some crap on YouTube without him moaning.

he will have to be inflicted on a good many unfortunate real live sick people on the way.

Mean.The boy is only sixteen. Were you fully fledged at sixteen MarchingFrogs? It's no-one's place to actively discourage another person's child from a particular course they might wish to pursue, even if one doesn't go all out to encourage them.

(Not directed at you Malbecfan; you seem to be handling prickly friend diplomatically! A general point).

Malbecfan one of the regular posters on the general uni threads has someone who started at KCL for a 4 year masters in neuroscience & psychology last year. I know they have found that there's a surprising amount of maths content, so it could be your friend's cup of tea. I think the standard offer was A,*AA. They had another good offer from Bristol for a similar course

I don't think you have to even focus on whether someone is suitable for studying medicine or not, the fact is that it is so competitive that I am sure many great candidates fail to get a place. So just as a sensible act of planning, the question should be "what's your alternative if you don't get an offer for medicine? take a year out? consider other courses?"

Thanks again everyone. The young man in question is now unwell again. Like his mother, he does seem to suffer a lot from different ailments. I can't help wondering if my "you're still breathing/ it's only a scratch" style parenting was wide of the mark. Mother thinks he has shingles. To be fair, DD1 got them in year 12 and I was convinced she had reacted to Lidl washing powder. I felt a bit crap when DH took her to the doctors on the first day I was back at work and she was actually ill . They seem to be at the GPs every week.

@goodbyestranger I have had a lot of practice! We were in the same class for 7 years of secondary school. She is a really kind & clever person but her people skills are a bit lacking, along with a sense of humour. @Hoghgyni that's really useful info, thank you. I will pass it on. Sorry everyone else for derailing, but it is really helpful to get opinions of people who have recent experience of helping year 12s.

As we reach the mid-point of term, I'm thinking of our student offspring, particularly those who are finding things hard, such as @PantTwizzler 's DS and others.

Ironoaks that's a lovely post. Yes, I too am thinking about how everyone's DC is getting on and wishing everyone all the best, especially PantTwizzler's DS.

My DS2 (O) is particularly desperate to be able to go back to university for next term and finding the weeks at home are dragging on and on. He feels he's missing out on university life and may not be able to get back to where he was - socially - after such a long time away again.

Like so many others, he and DS1 (C) only really got 6 weeks last term in any case, as two weeks were spent locked up in isolation in college rooms (no fridges or microwaves allowed in their rooms and access to food during isolation was shockingly meagre too). So it feels like they've had so very little university life or even time away from home at all in the last 2 years (given they also had a gap year spent stuck at home).

This is no way to spend your youth! I feel so sorry for all the young people. Whilst our lot are lucky to have regular tutorials/ supervisions online, it still doesn't give them anything like the real person to person experience of teaching or of student life. So I do hope we hear better news for our student DCs shortly.

How are those who are lucky enough to be back at college finding life at uni. in lockdown? DS1 and DS2 are very envious of those allowed back to university but also realise that for now, they'll just have to be content enough at home. I can't imagine it's that much more fun in college right now than stuck at home, given all the restrictions.

Exactly 12 months ago DD had a trip to her College to motivate her. I think of that weekend as being our last glimpse of normal.

DD is working incredibly hard, as each subject has essays or worksheets to hand in each week. She knows her way around the library now and has a study space on College to give her a change of scene. At least 50% of those taking her subject in her college are on site, with lots of chemists, medics and music students too for company. It's not quite what she dreamed off, but it's as good as it's going to get. They are in households now, rather than being treated as singles like last term.

She knows where she will be living next year and, as Hall meals have been sporadic, is quite looking forward to self catering with more than just a saucepan and a couple of wooden spoons.

I feel for all of our lovely and deserving DC and I’m hoping they are all getting something positive out of this term. I’m not sure about midpoint though, @Ironoaks, there are only two and a bit weeks left, would you believe it?

DS feels very fortunate to have been in college all term and is trying to make the most of it, but that doesn’t stop him feeling very wistful about what life could have been like. He has been lucky to have had a fairly large, sociable bubble and they were getting on well but the freshers in his college were informed yesterday that their bubbles are going to be regrouped, because a few additional people have returned. This means that, under threat of being sent home, they are no longer allowed to socialise with some of the friends that have been supporting them for the last six weeks. He’s a bit frustrated but some of the others are really quite down about this news. I think they’re also fed up with being treated as pariahs: DS went the wrong way through a gate in college to avoid someone (actually trying to be helpful) and was accused of being selfish and “unsafe” (how I have grown to hate that word). He’s spending quite a bit of time outside of college..

D1 a bit overwhelmed with work, four essays due this week, she's had to ask to push two back.

Am really, really hoping they can be back in Oxford for Trinity. I see that they will have some news on this later this week. It looks like hotels will not be open before May 17th, so we would not be able to take her (too far to do the round trip in one day)

Surely, surely they will be allowed back for Trinity term. Given that round about then 10,000 spectators can gather at Wembley, surely..?

It has been very hard for them hasn't it, home, or away.

I think I caught something in the statement to the commons that said reviewing universities at the end of the Easter holidays. Surely that can't be true???? How can they go into exam term with some of them there and some of them home?

OhYouBadBadKitten, I think you're right. It looks like a decision won't even be made until the end of the Easter holidays and the uncertainty is I think worse than the decision going either way, at least for DS2. It would be so much better just to know now that they'll be missing two ninths at least of their entire time at Oxbridge (and of course for second and third years, a larger proportion) than to be left not knowing until the very last moment.

It also feels very unfair that some have been back all the time and others stuck at home. That's an enormous part of a young person's life to be back with parents/ carers - unable to meet others their own age - rather than flying the nest.

DS2 (O) had already known that Prelims will be all online and open book - which he actually doesn't like at all. Same for DS1 (C) for his first year exams too.

When they first heard about larger gatherings outside being allowed, they were happily discussing May Balls - but now it seems that they may not be back at uni at all this year. I personally feel very angry on their behalf, although of course like all of us can 'understand' the reasoning behind this.

@Flyonawalk

Surely, surely they will be allowed back for Trinity term. Given that round about then 10,000 spectators can gather at Wembley, surely..?

I would have thought so, yes, but that would assume some degree of logic that seems to have been missing from decisions. I can't fathom it at all.

I don't understand it at all. It makes utterly no sense to me.

A day when we should be looking towards the future and we have literally no clarity at all.

Yes absolutely wtf is this about a decision at the end of the Easter holidays? Just makes no sense at all.

And at the end of whose Easter holidays? There's no such thing as a universal Easter hols for universities.
How can they know when they can go to a night club but not know when they can return to university?

I'm wondering if renting a room somewhere is a viable option for dd.

Government: Students who need to do practicals as part of their course can return from 8 March.

University: Yeah, not sure about that. We'll let medics back. Maybe one or two other students, if we feel like it. We'll let you know.

College: Please don't attempt to come back. Your keycard won't work, and you won't be able to get in your room, and you'll just have to go home again.

Exactly.
I didn't realise that going to cambridge would become a disadvantage!

Meanwhile, for those lucky enough to be in college at the moment:

College: You now have too many in your bubble, we’ll have to split it into two.

Students: Please let us stay together. We’ve been with the same people for 6 weeks and we are all providing each other support.

College: Too bad, you have to split, it’s for your own safety. And furthermore, if we catch any of you from Bubble 1 in the kitchen of Bubble 2 we will immediately send you home

Student: Please could I use this erg machine in this empty room? No? How about just to do a workout because my room is too small?

College: NO, it’s unsafe.

What is with them? They appear to have no common sense and no sense of humanity or compassion.

Meanwhile, D2 is going to be back at school, in classes of up to 30 in one room, from March 8th. (No social distancing, it's just not possible.)

It's ridiculous. They could probably vaccinate students in Trinity term.

DD is gearing up to return next term. Both her college and dept said she could return this term, but she preferred to stay here.

Her younger brother also goes back to school on 8th March. His school were really good at keeping them safe and in school. They only had 2 cases in the admin staff, so they spent the whole of last term in school which was so good for his MH.

The vaccination programme here is still doing over 70's so DD is more likely to have a jab in Oxf than here.