Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Higher education

Talk to other parents whose children are preparing for university on our Higher Education forum.

Original poster

Durham University

998 replies

NotEnoughTime · 04/02/2020 14:18

Hello.

How many of us are waiting for their DC to hear back from Durham? My DS applied back in October last year and is getting very down now he knows that others who have received offers are being informed that they will be told soon re college allocations.

I am usually a 'no news is good news' type of person but even I am finding it hard to be upbeat as I too am fed up Confused

I wish they would just let him me know soon if he is going to get an offer or a rejection and then he can get on with his life and his A Level revision without this hanging over him.

OP posts:
bigTillyMint · 21/10/2020 21:21

@bevelino, when we first took DS to Durham the (very friendly) 2nd year who was helping asked if he had come far. He said London and she asked if he was at school there. DS didn’t miss a beat and said yes Grin
My DD is at Bristol and she said halls in the city centre (where she was in first year) are much more mixed.

@goodbyestranger, he has made some normal state school friends. But the majority do seem to be ex private or public school. It is a massive contrast with his boys at home!

goodbyestranger · 21/10/2020 21:24

Which colleges in Oxford consist of overwhelmingly independent school kids then bevelino?

quest1on · 21/10/2020 21:46

I have to say, reading this thread is kind of worrying and off-putting and even though DS has applied this year, it really doesn’t sound like his scene at all. He is at an independent school but not a rah one - it’s very urban, etc. All this sounds absolutely horrendous to me. Also, is there much ethnic diversity at this uni - it doesn’t look or sound like it? I’m not sure about this at all...

quest1on · 21/10/2020 21:55

This Castle and “Hatters” sound like the kind of place he would lent stick around for 5 minutes. He put St John’s - is this the same? He only put it as it looked like it has a nice view and he read they are good for music / singing. We had no idea.

quest1on · 21/10/2020 21:56

*wouldn’t stick around in

goodbyestranger · 21/10/2020 21:57

quest1on I think it extremely likely that a kid from a comp somewhere in Durham county would find your DS's school intensely rah. Your own perspective may not be the most objective.

goodbyestranger · 21/10/2020 21:59

If you're that concerned, and your DS shares your concerns, he can delete Durham as an option. Also, he may not get an offer. Also, if he does get an offer he doesn't have to accept it. All is not lost.

EggsFried · 21/10/2020 22:06

@quest1on I was at Durham fairly recently and I'm from a very working class, state school background. I had a great time and made (hopefully!) lifelong friends. Yes, there were some 'rah' types and some who didn't get that others didn't have the amount of money or connections for work experience that they had, but I never felt like I didn't fit in. I appreciate that this is just my anecdotal experience, but I wouldn't let it put your DS off if he likes Durham otherwise. I'm so sad for those in the article and in this thread who had bad experiences due to the minority Sad

quest1on · 21/10/2020 22:08

Well possibly, but to me, “rah”is a very British thing and it is what it is, but mainly boring.

goodbyestranger · 21/10/2020 22:14

You've gone from worried about rah stuff to bored with it in less than thirty minutes quest1on Grin

quest1on · 21/10/2020 22:14

Thanks Eggs. He couldn’t care less about people with money. It’s more that “rugger bugger,” loud-mouth, arrogant kind of mentality. I hope that type of mentality isn’t too pervasive?

quest1on · 21/10/2020 22:16

But why would Durham be any more like this than anywhere else?

bevelino · 21/10/2020 22:41

[quote bigTillyMint]@bevelino, when we first took DS to Durham the (very friendly) 2nd year who was helping asked if he had come far. He said London and she asked if he was at school there. DS didn’t miss a beat and said yes Grin
My DD is at Bristol and she said halls in the city centre (where she was in first year) are much more mixed.

@goodbyestranger, he has made some normal state school friends. But the majority do seem to be ex private or public school. It is a massive contrast with his boys at home![/quote]
@bigTillyMint Mansfield College is overwhelming where the majority of state school students are (96%). No question.

bevelino · 21/10/2020 22:43

My last comment was for @goodbyestranger re Mansfield College Oxford.

mum2eim · 22/10/2020 00:42

@quest1on my DD is 2nd year Johns. She is from a northern state school so the opposite end of the spectrum to the ‘rahs’. However she settled in and found johns to be a great mix. Her current living out household is a mix of students from all over the U.K. and abroad, different Types of schools and an ethnic mix. Johns has a reputation for being a very friendly college and that’s what she’s found. Everyone seems to know each other.

MarchingFrogs · 22/10/2020 00:57

96% of state school students at Oxford are at Mansfield College?

I guess I've misunderstood that...

So why would Oxford Admissions / colleges manipulate the admissions (assuming that actual applications to Mansfield are something quite different from 96% state) to ensure that one college ends up with such a preponderance of state school applicants being offered places there vs privately educated? Is it some sort of weird social experiment?

bigTillyMint · 22/10/2020 07:16

@quest1on, my DS loves it at Durham! Like @EggsFried, he has made great friends (mainly from his college) and would definitely recommend it to ex state school kids. I know a few other ex state school students/graduates of Durham and all loved it.

He doesn’t like “loudmouth rugby types” as his sport is footy Grin Coming from London, he has found Durham to be very white, but it might seem quite mixed to someone from a less ethnically mixed area?

Re singing, I know that St Mary’s has a great singing society, but I’m sure there are opps in most colleges.

janinlondon · 22/10/2020 07:37

My DD sang in Johns chapel choir last year quest1on. Their music is great. If your DS is musical, Durham offer Vice Chancellors scholarships for music and the arts - they are worth applying for. For what its worth, DD is from an independent south London school but she had a bursary and four scholarships - she says she has considerably less ££ than her state school friends at Durham. I don't think the independent/state divide is anywhere near as important as people may think. There are some Rahs in every college. Its not hard to avoid them!

goodbyestranger · 22/10/2020 08:27

This was my question: Which colleges in Oxford consist of overwhelmingly independent school kids then bevelino? in response to your comment. So the Mansfield thing doesn't answer it.

goodbyestranger · 22/10/2020 08:30

And that was my question because the corollary of concentrating state school pupils in certain colleges must be that other colleges are overwhelmingly peopled by independently schooled kids.

Johnathonripples · 22/10/2020 08:35

Confused Dc Is in a northern state school, is mixed race and has applied to Durham. I’m quite worried now after reading these posts.We’ve just had a brief chat about it . Dc was already aware of reports and (unlike me!) remains philosophical

mum2eim · 22/10/2020 09:09

@Johnathonripples i can understand your concern having read these posts however as a PP has said I think it is a very loud vocal minority who give the university a bad name. My DD has found nothing but support, tolerance and friendship and has some fab friends. I really do believe that the vast majority of young people are kind, inclusive, and amazingly wonderful human beings. It’s a matter of steering clear of those who aren’t and finding your crowd.

DominaShantotto · 22/10/2020 09:32

@Johnathonripples I'm from the Pennywell estate (if you know the NE you'll have heard of it in the general list of really crappy council estates) in Sunderland. I still had a great time at uni, and I still made some lifelong friends (hell I'm still good friends with my ex boyfriend from that era). I did well out of Durham really - loved my department and I did find that the college staff really looked after me as a polite friendly local student - they all took me right under their wing bless them.

I'm not sure it's where I would choose nowadays if I was 18 again - but that's because my whole career path has changed (I'm currently back at uni retraining doing a healthcare professions related degree) and it's not a route that Durham offers in terms of courses.

If he wants to go there - back him - just advise him that getting drunk and trying to walk on cobbled streets is a sure fire ticket to ending up in the doctor's surgery with a busted ankle - they see LOTS of ankles twisted like that!

Johnathonripples · 22/10/2020 09:34

You are right mum2eim . I’m sure dc will continue to ‘go where the nice people are’ ( wherever she ends up).
It actually just made my stomach churn a bit to read
Dc said “ mum .. there are stupid people everywhere
Smart kid Smile

Revengeofthepangolins · 22/10/2020 09:48

@marchingfrogs. Don’t be thrown by comments upthread about oxford college state/independent apartheid. This year 69% of offers went to state schools and you can look up the stats by college. They all vary somewhere around the average except for the aforementioned Mansfield which has a states policy of focussing on state (and in particular disadvantaged/ low Oxbridge track record state, not selective grammars), hence its near total state school stats. Quite why any independent school pupil applies there I don’t really understand.

So the majority of fellow students one meets will be state educated. As is the case at Durham.

An interesting point is that quite a few of these metrics, like the Sunday Times analysis, are now grouping independent and selective grammar/ sixth forms college together, so a new phase of how to look at these inclusion stats seems be starting.