Oxbridge 2020 (6)

[Justneedatemporaryname]

New thread ready for when the old one gets filled up!

I hadn't thought of it that way. That's reassuring.

Well I finally heard from VB DS. He has an interview at his second college this morning. Apparently it was "awful" and he has spent the rest of the day trying to forget about it

I am hoping that he will get another one tomorrow as he only had one at his college plus one at a second college, whereas most maths applicants get 2+1 minimum. The main thing though is that he doesn't seem as depressed about it as I first thought

MY DH found some graphs which show the link between how an Oxbridge interviewee feels the interview went and whether or not they were offered a place. He said the curves of the 'went well' and 'disaster' graphs were almost identical. I.e. the same number of people who thought it went badly got offered a place as the number who thought it went well, and the number who thought it went well but were rejected was roughly the same as those who felt it was a disaster and were rejected. There's just no knowing.

@Coleoptera - I'm being self-disciplined and deciding we have no idea how either of them did until mid Jan.

DD came home last Wednesday, fell asleep for a couple of hours, then went out to bash tennis balls for a couple of hours. I think our DC are far more resilient than they are given credit for. An Oxbridge offer is nice, but most of them realise that the odds are stacked against them. After all, if they don't understand that 80-90% get rejected, they aren't as bright as they think!

I don't think it's very mysterious at all Coleoptera. A number of sciences have interviews at two colleges as standard - easy. The college of preference or allocation has first dibs. And within that, some colleges do one interview only, others do two, and the length can vary. Humanities only do one college after which an applicant may be sent to a second college either because they've been pooled or, less commonly, for standardisation. Occasionally an applicant will be fished out early by another college which is wobbly about the calibre of their own direct applicants but that won't compromise the applicant's chances at the original college. It all makes sense to me and I can't see that it's opaque.

I find it baffling too, though probably because there isn't a fixed reason why people are called to interview elsewhere. DS's first choice college is a less glamorous, smaller one. But his second interview was at one of the famus colleges, and we couldn't work out why, if he was being pooled, such a prestigious college didn't already have enough applicants. It would make sense the other way round, but this way round, it's mysterious.

Not really milliefiori - who applies where in any given year is random. Some big name colleges can just end up not happy with their direct applicants and so they look for substitutes.

She doesn’t feel like she’s gotten an offer but that’s ok as she’s gotten an offer to study medicine at Bristol! So so pleased for her.

Jesus, who cares about Oxbridge?! A medicine offer is a medicine offer! She's bloody done it! 💃

@goodbyestranger it's so weird that you're trying to spar with me over social mobility. You, who's DC went to a top school and you sent five of them to Oxford, aiming for six, versus little me with my state school low polar/acorn quintile DD just trying to catch a break 👀

Congrats to your dd Plantainchipss!

Plaintain thanks to Justneed I've read back and spotted that you had sneaked this news into a middle paragraph of a post. That is fantastic news.

I've no idea where that one came from Justneedatemporaryname. It seems pretty uncalled for!

I'm also a bit weirded out by the notion that I 'sent' five of my DC (six actually, strictly speaking) and that I'm 'aiming'. That's very dubious terminology.

Also, can I just point out with the greatest of respect that my DC go to a maintained school not an independent and that you can't know anything of my circumstances or theirs. DD4 has no less claim to a place at Oxford than your DC, simply because a number of her siblings have gone there.

I don't see the call for such unpleasantness.

Unpleasantness how? I've just said it's weird that you're going on about social mobility to me. Ive not been rude or unpleasant. 5...6..., whatever...you've sent a carload to Oxford so no idea why you're berating me that I don't care about social mobility. Sent/aiming/ whatever....If you were a parent who didn't care you would not have that set of results. You're on these threads even in the years when you don't have any kids applying, so you obviously are pretty involved/ invested.

As if I claimed that your DD has less claim to a place than mine because her siblings went there!

I must have misread the tone of your post Justneedatemporaryname, because I read it as rude and hostile.

I'm far from the only parent of a DC at Oxbridge who returns to these threads even when other DC aren't applying - there are loads of us. It's usually everything to do with sharing previous experience (kind of the exact purpose of this board) and zilch to do with 'investment'.

Probably best to move on?

Congrats to those with offers coming in. Lovely to hear.

I know what you mean re the relief from stress millie — and I've got a mere singleton going through it! However now I realise just how far behind with Christmas preparations I am...

No idea why you're being so cold.
I was just hanging out here as I was excited that my first DC might actually have a chance at Oxbridge. I will bow out of this thread now as I clearly don't know the 'rules'

@Plaintainchipss - I wrote you a congrats and it got eaten instead of posted. As others have said - it's fantastic that your DD got the Bristol offer Only 40% of all medicine applicants get any offer at all, so she has done brilliantly already. Must be a weight off her mind.

I am so relieved for DT2 with his first offer today. Another weight off the mind. Now both DTs have one offer. But that's all they have so far...

@PantTwizzler - I was behind too - partly because we're redecorating but really because I couldn't quite get into the festive mood when DC both had such important interviews hanging over them. Now they are done and the tree is up I feel much more festive. I even baked some mince pies.

Wow - that all took a weird direction!!!

I think most people are hanging out here because (for most of us) it's an unusual/amazing/fantastic achievement for our kids to have even applied. It's somewhere we can bang on about it without boring people to death in RL or making ourselves look like total nutters!!!
It's also somewhere we can try to bring each other back to reality. They get in or they don't get in. Nothing we can do about it and whatever happens there are lots of other Unis. An Oxbridge degree really isn't Willy Wonkers golden ticket to life success.
There seems to have been an argument when there really doesn't need to be one.

I find this thread really helpful. Was a lifeline to me last year when DD was going through the process. Sometimes the tension we all feel seems to bubble up in random spats but mostly it’s due to misunderstandings. We’re all in the same boat whether we’ve got older DC who’ve got in or not.

It’s sometimes easy to feel more anxious as a result of these threads. I did last year with a DD who can’t be described as diligent.

Anyway I’m waffling. Peace and love to all

Thanks for the “well dones”. Fingers crossed Pepermintea. It will be good if DC have another opportunity to show themselves off.

I think a lot of these small spats are definitely due to misunderstanding. I think Just was saying she felt odd being talked to about social mobility/access from someone who i supposed more privileged/wouldn’t fit the social mobility/access criteria. Sorry if that’s poorly worded. Very tired from being on call. Either way we’re all in this together. High school musical anyone ?

Dropping back in after a very long absence to say that I am collecting DS from Oxford tomorrow (today, I guess). He had a good interview, a bad one and an in between one, met some people whose company he enjoyed and he's done his best.
Now we just have to forget about it until January 14.

However, one positive outcome from all this is that I will be putting a pack of playing cards in DD's Christmas stocking. Essential for JCR bonding sessions, regardless of final location.