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Higher education

Talk to other parents whose children are preparing for university on our Higher Education forum.

Our DC are nearly all officially students now (going to university 2019/20) - seizing the moment, spending, socialising, societies and studying!

999 replies

NewModelArmyMayhem18 · 17/09/2019 16:00

Previous thread

[Edited by MNHQ to fix the link]

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Piggywaspushed · 20/09/2019 13:36

baytree, can't remember which poster ahs the nurse but not mine : he is IR and politics, bless him.

It is really sexist but I have indeed told him to speak to the girls about the bacon and washing as I said they would not judge!

Thanks to MN threads , he is the only one with a clothes airer, so apparently it has been co opted for communal use, so they must owe him some instructions on washing!

Chillywhippet · 20/09/2019 14:32

Piggy I hope your DS starts to feel more settled quickly. If he doesn’t his uni will have a wellbeing service with people whose job is to support with settling especially if he has a history of anxiety. There should be a hub where he can drop in? I know that takes confidence too.

Chillywhippet · 20/09/2019 14:33

Trewser good on your DD. Helping that lad out will make them both feel better.

bengalcat · 20/09/2019 15:04

Piggy now he can do bacon and pasta if he throws in a whipped egg , cheese and a dash of cream he’s got a variant of carbonara - like me last night

Baytreemum · 20/09/2019 15:11

Piggy - well that sounds an amazing degree too!
I know - mumsnet is THE place for finding stuff out and this thread is so supportive -thanks everyone.

ZandathePanda · 20/09/2019 15:31

Oh dear God.

THE PACKING

ARGHhhhhhhhhh

Deep breaths.

NewModelArmyMayhem18 · 20/09/2019 15:36

The IKEA bag is too heavy - trying to rejig everything into rucksacks :-(. I feel your pain @ZandathePanda!

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Mustbetimeforachange · 20/09/2019 16:07

All 3 of mine are at non-RG universtities and people regularly wrinkle their noses, especially a famly member whose children all went to a terribly posh school & all went to Cambridge. I don't think they know anyone else who goes to such lowly establishments Grin

NewModelArmyMayhem18 · 20/09/2019 16:09

In my family we embrace everything from Cambridge University to post 92 universities. #Inclusive :-)

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Ragwort · 20/09/2019 16:15

Our DS now settled into his flat in NTU, very nice accommodation, & seem to be lovely flat mates, all very friendly (inc. the parents - wonder if any are mumsnetters Grin). All quite reassuring, & DS seemed happy; we are spending the night in the city to explore. He is with four girls and one other boy, who is on the same course which is nice.

Mine how did you get on? Lovely hot day in Nottingham.

NewModelArmyMayhem18 · 20/09/2019 16:21

There really should be a secret MN code, don't you think???? Glad to hear that your DS is now settled @Ragwort!

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icanbewhatiwant · 20/09/2019 16:41

@Trewser your daughter sounds lovely. I'm hoping there will be some helpful girls in my ds's accommodation. 7 girls 3 lads. I've already been told off today by a family member for assuming the girls will be better at cooking and keeping things clean than the boys. I know it shouldn't be true but it's often the case.

Piggywaspushed · 20/09/2019 16:47

trewser your DD sounds lovely. I was a bit like that when I was at school. I used to have lost souls following me around! Guess that's why I am a teacher!

Shimy · 20/09/2019 16:55

So many interesting posts here since last I was on and I want to comment on them all Grin. Head has been buried deep in last minute packing and shopping....o yes! Shopping for my CHILD(to those who don’t know I am the author of the BACKPACK thread. Please pm me for payment of all royalties Grin.

I had no idea when i idly started that thread, that it would snowball into something of that magnitude. It’s the worst case of over projecting I’ve seen.

To the poster whose dc has gone to Swansea, Swansea is a marvellous uni and I’m still secretly disappointed DS isn’t going there, it was his insurance. I was blown away by the department, facilities and tutors that I met. Not to talk of the sea on the doorstep. Imagine going to the beach every time you visitSmile.

Re:RG thread, the likes of Bath, Loughborough etc. They’re way better than quite a few of the acclaimed RGs. I had to ask that question because I thought if employers really aren’t having regards for the aforementioned, perhaps I should just advise DS2 to stick to the RG list?. I graduated yonks ago and went to (whisper) an “ex poly”Grin. But at the time had no reference point (recently arrived from abroad) for it nor did RG list exist.

DH and I both went to what MN would call dire non Unis but we both went on to have good careers. DH went on to do an MBA at Harvard from rubbish ex poly! Neither of us got Jobs via graduate recruitment, infact no one came to recruit at our poly/uni😂. I got my first job from an advert in the local Herald newspaper for my local area. It required a degree for a very specific role, i got it and just went up from there.
Graduate recruitment” programs are not the only source of jobs.

My course also had 3month internship included. The local businesses always like to support local unis so I ended up doing my internship with BA. Infact BA didn’t recruit interns from any other university. I’m sure MN elite would’ve assumed only RGs could be offered such an opportunity.

I do feel for posters perhaps reading these threads for whom this is their first time of supporting a dc or going to university themself/selves? The confidence with which some speak that unless you go to RG you will NEVER GET A GRADUATE JOB! It must be so stressful them.

Last but not the least, the funniest thing on MN education threads I’ve read is, just when you thought you’d got into the RG elite, you mention Cardiff(DS)/Liverpool and poster pops up, ‘those are bottom of the RG’, Newcastle? “they Let anyone in”, Birmingham? “Full of unconditionals”. Only the “golden five” will do! Grin. So my last word is unless your dc is in the G5 you’re wasting your time GrinGrin.

NewModelArmyMayhem18 · 20/09/2019 17:13

@Shimy not sure it really matters in real life. Some post 92s can do so much better than those who went to RG universities or even Oxbridge. There's really no rhyme or reason to outcomes!

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DrMadelineMaxwell · 20/09/2019 17:13

I came home from work to the highest pile of boxes and 2 suitcases of dds stuff.
She goes next weekend.

She had packed neatly.
She is now going through it all taking out stuff when she has changed her mind and inviting new stuff and fitting stuff in gaps.

Dh dislikes driving. But he is the one with the estate car so he may have to suck it up if it wont fit in mine.... esp as he and dd2 want to come too.

RaptorInaPorkPieHat · 20/09/2019 17:19

We've just got back, the flat and her flatmates are all very nice (massive kitchen). DD was very weepy when we left, and was worried about eating, she has GAD and an eating disorder and finds it hard to eat when she's stressed or due to leave the house (Obviously I've totally over compensated and left her with a huge amount of food).

The house is so quiet and I'm feeling rather sorry for myself right now. I'm sure things will look better tomorrow.

mimiasovitch · 20/09/2019 17:19

For those going to Swansea, it is my home town and when I was growing up it was known as the graveyard of ambition. Basically, folk seemed to end up staying Smile. It is rather glorious right now in the sunshine.

I'm having a sit down after the trauma of packing. So. Much. Stuff. We've streamlined kitchenware as much as possible, but still so much. Also a teapot and cosy, as a girl's got standards Grin

Shimy · 20/09/2019 17:22

@NewModelArmyMayhem18 The ferocity with which some posters position RG degrees makes makes me wonder perhaps I’m getting too old to know what’s going on in industry? Thankfully, neither of my two are interested in Law. There’s seems to be an element of wishing to keep certain people firmly in their boxes. Now wether that’s out of pure altruism (you’ll never pay back that debt!) or fear from the competition is the interesting question.

Benjispruce · 20/09/2019 17:36

No packing done here yet. Still got another week and DD's birthday before then. She will be packing the night before I imagine!

Shimy · 20/09/2019 17:38

@ if it makes you feel any better DS has just put all his clothes including underwear in the wash. We are leaving for drop off first thing tomorrow.

Benjispruce · 20/09/2019 17:43

University snobs are just plain, ordinary snobs and can do one as far as I am concerned. DD is going to a RG uni and did have an interview at Oxford purely because her grades were good enough and school pushed her in that direction. Neither I or DH went to university and I am so proud of whatever my DDs achieve, whether it be A Levels, a vocational qualification or an apprenticeship. Couldn't give two hoots what the snobs think.

bengalcat · 20/09/2019 17:50

Just got my car back from the garage after its service / oil change /new tyre and balancing etc so it’s fit to trundle all the way up the M1/A1 - DD relieved - car is 6 months older than her .

Benjispruce · 20/09/2019 17:54

Incidentally , when DD had her 2 day interview at Oxford, some of the people she met made it easy for her to not be disappointed when she didn't get through. Hoping it's a bit more real at Durham but I guess it might be similar.

bengalcat · 20/09/2019 17:57

Mines off to Durham too . People and kids at the open day seemed a nice mix .