Applying for Uni 2019 entry, parents support thread

[Decorhate]

Now that they are back at school, working on Personal Statements, doing the final Open Day visits, I thought we could do with a new thread...

Also now panicking that IR will be over subscribed this year!!

Leaving the last box empty for now sounds like a good plan. I was going to suggest that to DD when she was havering over her 'backstop', but she then decided that UEA trumped Kent after all, course-wise. Today, she got her official prediction of AAA, but apparently her French teacher was a bit lukewarm. I am trying to encourage her to get her UCAS form in pdq, before he changes his mind, since that A is the one she needs for Leeds (favourite) and would also need for Exeter if they make her an offer but from the top of their 'typical' range.

I have to say, though, none of her five is a place that she wouldn't want to take up, were it to be the only offer she got.

DD has shown her PS to her tutor at school - it's only her second draft, but the tutor says it's good enough to be her final one. She has a Seren event next week focussing on PS and applications, so I've told her to wait until she's been to that before deciding for herself whether she's happy with it.

Thanks NewModel, a quarter is a lot of students for sure. What subject is your DS hoping to study? At least he's busy. I'm pretty sure DS hadn't thought about his first draft of his PS this time last year tbf.

Leeds is my home city, I'm happy to answer anything I can about the city. I still love the place, good choice

I’ve not posted for a while as having worked on her PS, identified the drama schools she wants to apply to, and learned several audition speeches, DD is now having second thoughts about applying this year! She’s worried about the time commitment and is thinking she’d be better focussing in her A levels.
I’m happy that she’s working well on her academic studies, but I’m hoping she might apply to a couple of places just to get some audition experience,

Surely you could do a combined honours in both those subjects?

Yes, you'd think so, but he doesn't seem keen!

Atia, he could do Maths & then a post grad IT qualification (if such things exist still, they did back in the dark ages - several of my friends did one)

(long & boring)

I'm pulling my hair out with dd; she ended up in tears at the meeting tonight & I had to take her home. Their deadline for the completed form & personal statements is November 1st.

She's chosen four courses to apply to (Southampton (Msci) AAB, Liverpool AAB, Southampton (BSc) ABB & Bangor BBB), her EPQ is done, she's got good stuff for her PS, she got AAB in the mocks (2018 AS papers). It should be fine but she still doesn't know what to do.

Tears tonight were because I snapped at her as she got into a spiral of over thinking - we've talked endlessly about it - she didn't managed to speak to the UCAS woman because she was too upset.

She's worried that her predicted grades are too low (this was what she was fretting about a few days ago). Everyone has negotiated their grades up but she didn't - because the mock results were all she needs. Now she thinks she should've done because if everyone else does it she thinks the universities will think her grades are aspirational when they are actually conservative. Then she won't get offers. I'm 95% sure her biology grade would be put up to A* if she actually spoke to the teachers but she's decided they hate her so she won't. This is largely because her target grades were so much higher than the predicted grades she's ended up with & as a result she's completely lost confidence that she'll pass at all.

And she doesn't want to apply with her grades. This is her thinking - with her predicted grades she'll get an interview

"Candidates who are predicted to attain our standard degree offers will be invited to visit the University ... this formal interview also gives us the opportunity to get to know you."

if she does okay (she's nerdy about the subject & very outgoing - she should be okay) she'll get an offer. If she slips a grade they will probably (according to the course admission tutor) take her anyway but if she slips a grade and applies after results she won't get an interview in the first place.

I'm going to call the school (again) and see if we can get (another) meeting with the UCAS tutor asap and go over it all (again).

(tl;dr)

she know what she wants to do, where she wants to do it, she should have the grades yet she's doing a lot of crying.

Atia why does he not like the idea of a joint honours?

laniakea the universities won’t care if any other students have “negotiated up” the predicted grades. All they will look at is whether the predicted grades match or are better than their usual offer. Do all of the courses interview? It’s much less common these days, more usual is to fling out offers if predicted grades are OK. I’m convinced those carefully honed personal statements aren’t actually read by most places.

It sounds to me like all this upset might be masking some more general anxiety about University?

Yes Laniakea is she correct that they interview? Have only known this for Oxbridge & Medicine...

Ds is going to put Southampton down as one of his choices & they did not mention interviews. Sometimes they invite applicants along for a day but I assumed more to sell the uni to them.

Can't remember what course your dd is after but my dd had Liverpool biosciences down as her non-medicine choice 4 years ago & got an offer within 2 days. I doubt they even glanced at her PS

laniakea, it's a very stressful time. I agree with Van, universities are looking for predicted grades to meet their standard offer grades, so your DD's don't need to be higher. In any event, surely if the grades are inflated, then there's more chance of not meeting them and having the stress of clearing?

If your Dd is anxious about the process, I'd say better the grades are realistic rather than aspirational. That adds more pressure.

It looks like she's chosen institutions wisely and chosen an insurance based offer.

How is she this morning?

No, some Maths interview, but I'm not sure the grades stated below would indicate a maths degree, they are extremely high indeed, ie. A (star) level.

No not maths but yes the course that she really wants to do (Southampton) interview - neither Bangor or Liverpool do (they are the only three places that do it) & I expect she'll get offers from them straight away. The course leader said it's the bit that determines how far you can slip & still get in (I know someone got in with ABC last year & the BSc was in clearing too). They only interview you if they are pretty sure they are going to offer though - it isn't a selection process like Oxbridge or medicine.

The trouble is that she is so fixated on this course - she's done the week Headstart with them, two department open days, talked at length to the tutors & course leaders etc - she doesn't want to go to either of her other choices & is really only putting them down because school want her to.

She's scared to apply because she doesn't want to get rejected; she's had a shit time in 6th form & I'd never have expected this complete collapse in confidence. Last night she was swinging between being fine with the predicted grades because she's confident she can get them & then saying she was going to fail physics anyway (just got a B in the AS) so there's no point in anything ... that's when I got cross with her.

She's off school today and has just gone out for a walk - I'm going to try and talk again when she gets back. Maybe I should just tell her to pull herself together at get on with it. Dh always manages to say the wrong thing & her girlfriend & best friend have both decided that it's all too stressful so aren't applying at all & that isn't helping either.

I'd be tempted to leave it for a bit and see if she settles. There's no actual rush really for non Oxbridge type UCAS applications to go in. It probably still feels quite overwhelming at present. Just a thought, it's very tricky.

Yes, I think that's a fair course of action. Can you convince her to just put the whole thing aside for a couple of weeks at least? You know she's not being reasonable, poor thing.

The interview will be like other science interviews - just to make sure the applicant knows what they're getting into. Hers is a fairly niche subject and they probably just want to hear that she knows what it entails!

She's got the predicted grades, she has loads of supporting experience, she really needs to calm the fuck down! (Said with much love!)

As for ds and his choices, who knows - he said to me this morning that he'll just decide on whichever one he prefers. "How will you work out which one you prefer?" I'll just pick it. Good god. We probably need to get the two of them together again soon, see if they can rub off on each other.

Or she could just leave the whole thing and apply next year with her grades? Or has she changed her mind about not going until 2020?

The only downside to waiting and applying next year is if the actual grades turn out to be lower than the standard offer.

The way things are going in many unis now, it seems a far safer bet to apply with predicted grades & hope that still take you still if you drop a grade.

If your dd would feel more positive about applying if her predicted grades were higher, how about contacting the Head of 6th form to see if he would bump them up? Ours said he would if necessary for the application and the subject teacher was reluctant...

The only downside to waiting and applying next year is if the actual grades turn out to be lower than the standard offer.

^ She's apply applying for deferred entry & the original plan was to go with grades but this is exactly what she's worried about - I think on balance she'll have a better chance applying this year.

Atia they could rub off on each other the wrong way & we'd end up with a quivering mass of indecision & defeatism I read her your message & she agrees calming the fuck down is the way ahead [obviously she takes more notice of you than me :p ]

The only A* predictions have been in maths, the biology teacher said they don't normally predict them but dd has agreed to talk to her again about it. Then she's going to try and forget about it all until half term - which will give her time to get a draft PS done & in for Nov 1st.

She's much happier this afternoon but it wasn't this hard when I applied!

Laniakea, I sympathise! My DD got herself into a state last week because her school prides itself on not inflating predicted grades (or not very much, anyway). Hers are completely fine for the courses she's looking at. But, apparently, absolutely everyone else who wants to study history in 2019 will be predicted AAA* and it's SO not fair.

She wouldn't listen to me or DH (as she rightly points out, we went to university in the Dark Ages and know nothing) but luckily elder DD, a recent graduate, calmed her down.

She's fine now.

I can't do strikethrough! "Or not very much" in my last post was supposed to my slightly cynical take on it. :)

And everyone else is going to be predicted three A*s. What's wrong with my keyboard?!

jane, it's when you try to write A (star), as the MN site thinks you are trying to put something in bold!

I think it takes the pressure off to have predicted grades that are realistic. DD's are high anyway (2 A stars and an A), I don't think it would do her good to have the extra stress.

DD's application is in now, she's the first in her year to submit, DS has helpfully called her 'a right sweat'! She doesn't care, she knows she is anyway and he was laid back to the point where I wanted to do physical harm to him at times

Laniakea
I don't know much, only had one Dc go through process, and he started last week, but UCAS deadline for most applicants is Tuesday 15/1/2019 at 1800. So your Dd has a long time to think. Also most university's outside the likes of Oxbridge/UCL/LSE tend to give out offers to students who match their UCAS tariff points.
Purely anecdotal Dc was predicated CCC, applied to 5 courses in range of BBC to CCD, got offers overnight from all, the 2 BCC give unconditional too.
Plus if your Dd gets no offer she is happy with their is extra, where you can add a 6th course.

Think is such a stressful time for Dc, trying to find their way through life changing decisions.

The variation in approaches to predictions is so unfair. I think Admissions depts across the country are frustrated by the demise of AS levels - makes it very difficult for them to be fair when different schools have different policies. Our school is "optimistic" and seems to generally predict a grade higher than they really think, but if other schools are just predicting the same grade as the mock, it is hardly a level playing field.