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Higher education

Talk to other parents whose children are preparing for university on our Higher Education forum.

Fighting our way through 1st year uni (starting Sept 17)

917 replies

HSMMaCM · 17/01/2018 20:41

Continuing the previous thread.

Exams, assessments, essays, etc.

Support, or lack of it.

Will they all get accommodation for next year and can they cook a balanced meal yet.

OP posts:
JugglingFromHereToThere · 17/05/2018 15:12

All her coursework is in and just 3 exams to go, one for each module, quite nicely spaced out.
I do like her course :-)

She's managed to fit in going to a show in London with friends when 3 tickets came up for it unexpectedly, so very excited about that!

bebumba · 17/05/2018 17:56

Another one who can't believe that the first year is almost over. Ds has lectures this week and then exams next week and the week after. Looking forward to collecting him at some point in early June. We haven't been able to pin him down to a date yet. I imagine he thinks we are sitting at home 24/7 awaiting his return with nothing else going on in our lives 😀

Xenia · 17/05/2018 18:28

user, on noise levels I thnk the universities do try. I was comforted by the sign in one hall whenI dropped off my son about no noise after a certain time but people don't seem to respect the signs. They also try and put you on a corridor with people with similar requests - eg I am a quiet person or I am a noisy person but that doesn't seem to work for everyone either.

I don't know about lack of engagement with academic life as as far as I know mine have been pretty involved and I think it's all quite quiet now as they are all doing exams. One of mine says he has been in the library constantly.

Postnot, what do we know we wish we'd known in advance? I can't really answer this as these are my last 2 children so I've had 3 go through it already so I didn't really hyave any surprises (one is even at the same university and hall as an older one had been). Just check what needs to be done by what date such as applying for accommodation, have a think about what kind of place they would like to stay in. I got them to open a student bank account or rather convert their existing one to one before they started. I also bought them a 3 year rail travel card and got that attached to their London oyster card at a tube station to get an extra discount. One of mine brought his laser printer from home down quite early in the first term so obviously he must have found he needed that there although I am sure the university has printers and halls do although they don't always work. I remember a veyr long call with his twin who was trying to print something vital to be posted to me and the hall printer was broken, the next one had no ink etc so he walked right over to his twins' other hall to use that printer. (Although most people don't take printers)

BestIsWest · 17/05/2018 18:54

DS has a workshop with a well known TV script writer today but apart from that is finished and we’ll be picking him up on Saturday.

I confess that I did absolutely nothing during my first long summer break when I was at uni but I hope he has a bit more motivation than I did.

He’s involved in organising a charity night with bands and DJs so that will occupy him for a bit.

HSMMaCM · 17/05/2018 20:57

Need more sleep -I'm loving the ham licking advice Grin.

Best is West - that workshop sounds interesting.

OP posts:
bigTillyMint · 17/05/2018 20:58

NMS, that is a shame for your DD that the exams are so late (must be the same for my DDs friend from home) and she can't join in with the end of term fun.

Good luck to all exam-takers!
My DD has 3 exams next week and then is done! She is pleased to have got tickets to a fancy ball and I am looking forward to going to see her on the BH weekend.

Needmoresleep · 18/05/2018 08:24

"I was comforted by the sign in one hall whenI dropped off my son about no noise after a certain time but people don't seem to respect the signs. They also try and put you on a corridor with people with similar requests - eg I am a quiet person or I am a noisy person but that doesn't seem to work for everyone either."

Signs dont work! Plus there is a bizarre problem in self-catered flats, at least where our DC are (different elsewhere as a friend who runs private student accomodation at another University assures me) that security don't "hear" noise themselves, they need it to be reported to them. So even though one party in DDs old flat was keeping the flat across the street awake until the early hours, unless a student reports it, security will not take action. The flat then face a "whole flat fine". So any student reporting will both incur the wrath of their flatmates and face a financial penalty. Worse still if drugs are then found, as the whole flat can be held responsible. Disaster for law or medical students.

And as for choosing whether you want quiet or not, you not only have to describe yourself correctly, but rely on up to eleven others to use the same terms to describe themselves. And not change dramatically once they leave home.

At the end of the day it is luck. DD would have been absolutely fine had she started in her current flat. I am a bit ranty because when things go wrong, there did not seem to be much in place to protect students. Her senior resident was brilliant, and rightly urged her to move, but senior residents are likely to disappear as a cost saving measure. No student is likely to go to central University welfare just because their neighbour won't use headphones, or has become completely nocternal, and though arriving at a remote placement with only two hours sleep can explain an off-par performance, it wont help your assessment.

But fine now. DD ended up missing some of last term, so lots of study and no "fun" for her (and I suspect after clearing vomit and witnessing come-downs she is well prepared for work in a busy A&E but less keen on taking part herself) and will lose a couple of weeks over the summer catching up with placements etc. That said she fully expects to enjoy next year, and is happily making plans. But this year was tough, way too tough, and the very sad thing is that next years students face even less support provision within halls. Perhaps they plan to put up more posters.

I understand that students themselves are planning to protest about the lack of welfare support. Even Big Brother participants struggle with being stuck in a house with people they don't know. I don't understand why 18 year olds should be expected to manage in a set-up where basic parameters of courtesy are not respected or enforced.

We need a thread next year where I can be the positive one whose DC is having a wonderful time.

user1499173618 · 18/05/2018 08:31

I don't understand why 18 year olds should be expected to manage in a set-up where basic parameters of courtesy are not respected or enforced.

Absolutely. The whole flat-sharing with strangers at university has got entirely out of control, IMVHO.

On good (legal) advice, one of our children was able to report illegal behavior by Unite staff to Student Accommodation. He was moved to far better university owned accommodation on the spot.

user1499173618 · 18/05/2018 09:02

I think probably that the time has come for some class action by students who believe that their right to ordered home life when in halls of residence is being neglected.

Needmoresleep · 18/05/2018 09:28

One precedent:

www.standard.co.uk/news/london/lse-students-to-get-500-each-for-their-appalling-living-conditions-a3815676.html

Though this account
thetab.com/uk/bristol/2018/05/15/i-did-not-show-up-to-class-for-the-entirety-of-last-term-and-nobody-noticed-a-student-speaks-out-about-mental-health-at-bristol-university-33717 resonated with DD. DD will be fine, however she knows two or three students who have, for different reasons and in different departments, had similar attendence records. One was probably overwhelmed by the academic challenge involved in the switch to University, and needed someone to reach out and hand-hold, another probably needed a kick up the butt and a reason to get bed in the morning and thus readjust their sleeping patterns. Either way someone should have noticed and acted. Instead it is left to fellow students to either step up to support, or bear the consequences. Unpaid/untrained 18 year olds.

user1499173618 · 18/05/2018 09:36

I went to Bristol and I really liked the fact that it was far more anonymous than a campus university would have been. I liked to disappear into the city, to pop to Bath or London for the day, to enjoy the things that non-students Bristol residents were offered - cinema, theatre, architecture, cafés etc. IMVHO there is a bit of a mismatch at Bristol between the institutional living arrangements in first year and the "big dorm" environment which is very overwhelming for those who need their personal space, and the city centre location of the university which is just ideal for those who need their personal space. Maybe this is contributing to some of the mental health issues - students suddenly and unexpectedly being tipped from one environment to the other.

Needmoresleep · 18/05/2018 10:09

You may be right. DD chose Bristol for many of the same reasons. Which is why, though she found the first year tough, she fully expects to love her remaining years. In contrast DS, in London, had no obvious problems. Great course, great city, but no pressure to engage with anyone other than like minded peers.

user1499173618 · 18/05/2018 10:14

This is becoming quite an interesting conversation. Maybe we should share it with the powers that be who are wondering why Bristol seemingly has more MH issues than other universities? The university is, after all, responsible for engineering a coherent environment for study.

user1499173618 · 18/05/2018 10:15

Goldney and Manor are so much better environments IMO than most of the other halls.

Needmoresleep · 18/05/2018 10:36

One parent thetab.com/uk/bristol/2018/05/16/being-seen-as-a-number-and-not-a-person-can-have-a-huge-impact-a-bristol-university-parent-speaks-out-33746 has already decided to contribute their views.

The problems are obviously not unique to a single University, but Bristol seems to be struggling more than most. The University has experienced rapid expansion, introduced contextual offers etc. The students are the first generation who don’t remember a world without social media (and linked issues like easy access to internet porn, or concerns around instagram perfect beauty etc), a surprising amount of confusion around gender identity, an education system increasingly focussed on grades, but with less emphasis on supporting skills (cooking, budgeting, experience with public transport, ability to share a bathroom). And a wider environment where drugs are very available, there is an intolerance of political diversity and a need to be correct, an uncertain job market, big student debt and so on.

user1499173618 · 18/05/2018 10:58

When I was at university, the girls all had excellent “supporting skills”. Boys were more of a mixed bunch. We fondly imagined that societal change would mean that in future generations both sexes would acquire and use those skills equally.

bigTillyMint · 18/05/2018 12:57

Very interesting that so many agree that Bristol is not meeting the MH needs of all (or even enough of the students) DD says there will be no senior residents next year which is worrying as she says hers is good.
And yes there's a MH march that she's planning to go on as she feels the MH support there is poor. Whilst she has been happy in her flat this year, she knows others who have struggled.

She chose Bristol for all those reasons and loves it as a city. She is hopeful that things will be good in her shared house next year, but living with others isnt always easy, and that's part of growing up IMHO.

NMS, the cleaner found drugs in DDs flat, all were summoned to the meeting but they let DD and others not involved leave the meeting (as friends, they did not want those not involved to be punished unfairly) and dealt with the ones involved. So fairly dealt with.

Needmoresleep · 18/05/2018 15:18

Yes, but if no one had owned up, the authorities would have had little option but to punish them all. This is what DD seems to have been told, would happen. At the same time as she was hearing about the problems medics have if caught with illegal drugs.

In practice hopefully they would not be that draconian, and her senior resident would have spoken up for her. But given the stated line, it is not a risk a student wants to take.

user1499173618 · 18/05/2018 15:51

It’s really not acceptable for the universities to create those sort of risks for their law and medical students.

Xenia · 18/05/2018 22:03

When I went there were halls that were particularly quiet eg all girls. I remember there were two girls only Roman Catholoic halls with nuns on site, lights out, doors locked etc. I didn't apply there because I wasn't prepared to share a bedroom - everyone had to there. That kind of atmosphere obviously keeps thing quiet and controlled but it's not too popular with most students.

I spoke to one of mine today - they seem happy as ever so that's good and one finishes exams next week but will come back in mid June as planned and apparently he did well in course work for the one exam which went badly so that will probably help. He said it had been the worst exam of his life so it must have been really bad as he's always coming out of exams saying they went well and were easy (never a wise thing to say in my view). We shall see. One of their older siblings had to do resits after year 1 and revise in the summer holiday so they know it's not the end of the world if that happens although I am sure they would prefer to avoid it.

HSMMaCM · 18/05/2018 23:00

DD passed her final exam. She has a quiet room and her tutor came over at the end of her exam and marked it immediately. Really helps her anxiety not worrying about the results.

Year 1 done ✅

OP posts:
ErrolTheDragon · 19/05/2018 00:03

Congratulations to her, hsmm- glad she has this sort of supportive environment.

Mine still has a few more days of lectures and labs and a lot more supervisions- her exams don't start till June 6th, which is after some courses have finished all theirs, but it sounds as though the porters are pretty good at enforcing reasonable night time noise control.

Needmoresleep · 19/05/2018 10:15

Xenia, similar halls still exist. Quiet and single sex. Very popular with some Muslim and overseas students. However most students want somewhere reasonably sociable but compatable with University study. DD is now in a flat with some lovely people. AFAIK the previous problems occurred because the University had not picked up that a student had not attended since October, the student's parents had not questioned the level of spending and kept providing top-ups, and there was little that affected residents could do to ensure their right to "quiet enjoyment" of their home.

If I were the University worried about student welfare and MH, I would not be worried about my DD. She had some physical health problems, exacerbated by her living arrangements, and was struggling to make headway with the University health services (a whole issue on its own), but we are MC so we picked her up, brought her home and arranged for her to be treated by a private consultant. Cheaper than her losing the year.

However I would be worried about the student who is not attending, and about one or two others who were vulnerable to peer pressure. The med student worried about drugs was not my daughter but one whose flat had been invaded for pre's and where the fog of dope smoke would have fumigated most pests and vermin. Again easy for DD, we would not have let her be punished for something she did not do. But not so easy for a girl with non-graduate parents who was the first in her school to get into med school.

As BTM suggests, the senior resident provided an acessible friendly face, not too far removed from a student, so an easy first point of contact. Better welfare services are needed but part of that is early communication with a student who is starting to flounder, with proper signposting, and that is best done departments (by monitoring of attendence and following up) and in halls themselves.

And sorry to everyone else. I hope exams are going well. The thread title was quite apt for us. Poor DD, because of the catch up, won't now be finished till mid July and she also starts earlier than most. But she will get a couple of weeks off in June and is sounding happy, which is all we really want.

bigTillyMint · 19/05/2018 17:42

Xenia, was that Bristol? Which halls were they? I remember when I was in Sheff and my bestie from home was in an all girls halls with meals at a set time Shock

NMS, DD has already talked to me about how noone checks up on students who don't attend at Bristol on most courses. However, it does seem to be something her school are hot on. I would have thought it was the bottom line in safeguarding myself.

HSM, well done to your DD! And what a good uni/lecturer to be so supportive.

ErrolTheDragon · 19/05/2018 17:57

Piece by Janet Turner in today's Times which might be of interest

www.thetimes.co.uk/article/hard-drugs-are-the-new-normal-at-university-6js690hm5?shareToken=8d231555f20d58fc9d91d2d0207246b2

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