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Higher education

Talk to other parents whose children are preparing for university on our Higher Education forum.

Original poster

DD may leave uni

31 replies

ginorwine · 14/12/2017 12:24

Dd was ill during a levels and first term uni
She finds has minimal social life and her course is quite intensive cf to my

OP posts:
Decorhate · 15/12/2017 07:00

OP, is your dd at Oxbridge? (thinking that because of the long holidays).

I would say it is very normal at this stage of 1st year for students there (or on other intensive courses) to realise that their uni experience is different to others. My dd's friend felt everyone else was having so much more fun. And seriously considered dropping out & reappling elsewhere by Christmas.

She did stick with it & perhaps improved her social life once she realised it wasn't necessary to aim for an A in every assignment.

Original poster
ginorwine · 15/12/2017 10:03

Hi better not say but yes it's intensive with short term s and rated best course in country for her subject . Think chose it for that but had no idea how intensive n reality . Totally different to our sons uni . He has a great social life as well as study and I think it makes her compare .
I wonder if should change uni but she chose it for course and beautiful location .
Sorry I had melt down - ! It was combined with a very significant and sad date and I think I became totally overwhelmed . Thank you all .

OP posts:
LIZS · 15/12/2017 12:13

It might be rated as the best course (although if that is based on a student survey it may or may not stand up to scrutiny) but that doesn't necessarily make it the best course for her. Have her ambitions changed, are there alternative ways to achieve it (different course/uni or an apprenticeship) or would she prefer to take time out to reconsider. However if she wants to be treated as an adult she needs some parameters about respecting your space and home and contributing while living there.

Original poster
ginorwine · 15/12/2017 13:09

I think she doesn't have a clue what she wants to do
She feels uni will give her space to do a bit of growing up but it may be mistake that it is an intense degree as lots round her v studious indeed .
I feel at a loss
. She won't let me talk to her just wants to chill at home for now ...

OP posts:
LIZS · 15/12/2017 13:13

Maybe let her chill until new year then. She will make a better decision when fully well.

Original poster
ginorwine · 15/12/2017 13:25

Yes good idea
We need to chill ++++ me thinks !!!
If she changes course to another uni she wd need go open days in Jan - so wd have to get onto it .
Thank you !!😁

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