Oxbridge info/ support thread 2014

[lismore]

Does anyone else with a DC applying for Oxbridge this year feel like having someone to share the highs/ lows/ questions- if so, please join in!
I have a DS who has just applied to Cambridge- our family has no Oxbridge background and he's at a state school which gives absolutely no advice so definitely feel at a bit of a loss how to support him.
I think he's incredibly brave even trying, especially as 80% get rejected unfortunately.

I seemed to have overlooked this thread for the last week- I needed you when I was doing the outwardly calm bit about DD's SAQ!

I'm so hoping that needsmoresleep's DS DID complete the SAQ on time....

I've done the Oxford wait with DS and DD1 but this is our first Cambridge application ( the royal 'our' obviously ) and so far the paperwork is scaring me silly - so much to do, so many deadlines! And no sign yet from her chosen college as to the potential interview dates for her subject - other colleges have already posted their expected dates.. So am keeping my diary as blank as possible for December so far.

And all the while reminding my DD that Cambridge is not the only great place - neither DD1 nor DS got offers from Oxford and have been seriously happy elsewhere with a 'never look back' kind of approach, so I know this is not the be all and end all.

I should also probably admit, in the interests of full disclosure, that I, too, have a serious Student Room habit.... Last application round for us I was checking the subject specific threads for my DD's chosen unis to see if any offers had been received that day!

Good post BeckAndCall.
It has long been DS's dream to go to Cambridge and I have always tried to reinforce the idea that it is aspirational and he should have a good plan B because it is something of a lottery even for those with the highest grades. I think he has accepted that and would be perfectly happy to go to his second choice. (In fact I think it might suit him better).
He has been asked by the college to send in various documents including proof of UMS. It seems likely there won't be much notice of interview, which may not be such a bad thing, if he gets that far.
From what I can gather Cambridge interviews a higher percentage of candidates than Oxford.

secretscwirrels I have also spent a lot of time persuading DD that there are other places other than Oxford and I think at last she is accepting that, but she would still dearly love to go there.
lismore DD is taking the TSA on weds and I was teasing her to make sure she sat at the right desk and take the right exam!
DD knows when the interviews are taking place and is really hoping she gets that far.
Hope the exams go well this week for anyone taking them.

Yes. We think the SAQ got in on time. The reminder email from UCAS did not stipulate a set time but simply said it needed to be uploaded 'tomorrow'.

At this point I really don't want to be hovering over DS. He is 17 and needs to take control of his own future. At the same time he is 17, and can be hopelessly disorganised. He is getting better and will have gained a bit of learning from this episode.

I think both DS and I hoped he would not like Cambridge. He ought to get into one of his other preferences and so it would be easier not to get caught up in the whole Oxbridge thing. However at the Open Day it was clear he loved it and would love to have the chance to go. So its down on the application form but I suspect he is being careful not to focus on any University till he knows what his choices are.

A low key approach is one thing. Forgetting deadlines another.

I'll sneak onto this thread too, though DS has Asperger's and OCD, with a current side-helping of depression, and I suspect he won't exactly shine at interview if he gets one.

Deadlines? You'd think he'd never heard of the word.

What is it about 17 year old boys and deadlines?
Everything was down to the wire with DS. He could have started his PS after exams, he could have started it after he got the results in August, but no, there was no hurry. The UCAS form itself, I nagged because I knew he would hit some kind of stumbling block and need me time to sort it out. But no, it was at the 11th hour again. Same with the SAQ.
While I maintain my stance about it being a long shot it would be a dreadful lesson to lose it by missing a deadline.

If its any comfort to those of you with boys of 17 and their 'down to the wire ' approach - by the time they're 22 they've got it sussed! You look at them and think, wow, that turned out OK didn't it?

Needmoresleep, I'm so glad you sent the SAQ in time, I've been wondering.
My DS also has his heart set on Cambridge. He's not really interested in anywhere else, even though he has an offer already.
It's so hard to encourage their dream and yet be realistic about their chances. I don't want to build up his hopes or seem too negative!

I don't know if youve seen these videos but they're quite helpful in terms of what goes on in an interview.

www.emma.cam.ac.uk/admissions/videos/interviews/

Thank you Timetraveller. I am aware of entering a new phase of parenting, supporting an (almost) adult child, whilst encouraging them to be independent and to take responsibility.

Oddly poignant for me as I now have Power of Attorney for my mother, and so as DC prepare to leave home my focus is shifting.

It is lovely to see my DC develop dreams and ambitions of their own. Part of it though will be for them to cope when things don't go exactly according to plan. Slightly easier for us in that DS did unexpectedly badly in a single AS paper. The remark took him up a grade, not the two that he might have hoped for. No Jan resits so he will take it again in the summer. He probably wont need that subject for a Cambridge offer, though he will elsewhere. However so many candidates will be presenting perfect A/A*s that Cambridge is now a bit of a long shot.

These things happen. Approach now is for him to apply for five quite competitive courses and see how he gets on. He will probably need to do a Masters anyway so would prefer not to take a gap year, but if he does he will hopefully have a good resit and have achieved his predicted crop of good A2 grades.

(As an aside I am curious about the impact the cancelling of the Jan resit will have on applications. My son cant be the only one in this position. His cousin has just started medical school with AAAA but achieved by re-sitting four or so exams. Presumably in future the similar candidates will be presenting with a much more patchy set of grades.)

DS has been quite course focussed and his chosen Universities will provide quite different life experiences. Two (London) are within walking distance, whilst another is campus, and the fifth a city. I sense that as with BeckAndCall's DC, he will be happy wherever he goes and decide in retrospect that it was the right decision.

Unfortunately all have a reputation for offering late, so UCAS is on a back burner in our household. A good chance to focus on A2s, though a bit miserable as his friends are starting to get offers.

needsmoresleep, at least with Cambridge the DC will know in the next 2 or 3 weeks if they have an interview and then on a specific date if they were successful. It's the uncertainty of the wait for the others which is tough! It could be months before its all sorted.

But we can take heart - my DS had his offers before Christmas, my current DD has 2 offers already but my DD1 didn't get the offer she firmed until March - a horrible waiting game, but at least it shows that offers from RG universities can come late and it does work out!

Hello everyone - lots has happened with us this week. Found out which college DS has been allocated at Cambridge (he had known for a couple of weeks but only thought to tell us this week!), and he had an interview at Manchester, got two offers, and has two more interviews lined up. So we've now heard from all his choices now except Cambridge.

It is SO nice to hear that other boys are the same re: disorganisation and deadlines. I am also now hanging out on the studentroom forum. And trying to work out how we pay for all the train tickets required for interviews in the next two weeks.

Needmoresleep - DS also did badly on a single paper, and in a subject which is crucial for all the courses he is applying for. We don't know what went wrong, but it wasn't remarked - he is just going to resit it in the summer, and his school reference mentions it. Hopefully they will see past it.

Purplepotato, that all sounds really encouraging, well done!

Needmoresleep, that all sounds quite tough! My DS is taking a year out at the moment, and also wants to do a masters. Believe me, it can be really very positive! He was lucky though, as he has his grades and doesn't need resits any more, he did a few last year, in Jan and summer. He had got very average AS grades, and could never have dreamed of applying to Cambridge, so this is all a little bizarre! After his A2 results, he changed his mind about the course he wanted to do, kind of 'upgraded'. The hardest time was when he was looking for a job in September, getting lots of rejections, and seeing on Facebook how much fun his friends were having in fresher's week! He is much happier now though, with a job in a supermarket working loads of hours, two uni offers and two interviews. Now he is sure he made the right decision, and is easier to live with! It will be a character building year! He was only 18 in June, so a year of maturing won't do him any harm. We also got a little car for him to use, so he is getting driving experience and independence too.
You have a tough year ahead, but it will make you stronger! :)

Hello all. Please can you tell me why Oxbridge is so attractive? This is a serious question from someone who did not go to university. DD2 is very clever, at a state school and in year 11. She is planning to take maths and 3 sciences for A level. From my point of view, I think she would miss part of the experience of uni by being at oxbridge as the terms are so short and intense. Views please? Thanks

hellsbells that is a strange question but if you are looking for a real answer it's because Oxford and Cambridge are recognised as two of the most academic universities in the world that attract the best teaching and research staff in their fields and only take the best academic 18 year old minds. If you're passionate about your subject and pushing back boundaries of knowledge then it might be the place for you (or your DC)

Yes, you have to be a certain kind of person for Oxbridge to suit you but they are big universities with a diverse group of students from all over the world and from all backgrounds ( some colleges more than others). But the vast majority will be the highest achieving academically in their schools and will have an incredible work ethic where only the best is good enough - so if that's the kind of person you are and that's the kind of person you want to mix with then it might suit you.

It's kind of like asking why do you want to play for Manchester United or Real Madrid when you could play for Sunderland or Hull - because they're good teams too aren't they? Yes they are, but they're not recognised as the best teams.

That said, never think that Oxbridge is the only place worth going to - as I said upthread, I have two older DC who both applied to Oxford and didn't get in who have been really happy elsewhere. And have great prospects as a result.

Thank you for your answer. It was a serious question. I would feel more comfortable with somewhere like Nottingham or Manchester but obviously it won't be my choice.

Seriously hells there would be no reason to be uncomfortable with Oxbridge no matter what your background or how unsuitable you think it is!! I'm not in the least bit posh and I've never even thought about my DC not 'fitting in' socially - I've only ever thought about whether it would be right academically

If you do some research on their websites you will see that for some colleges over half of their students are from state schools - eg Kings at Cambridge was over 70 % last year - no reason to feel uncomfortable at all. And most kids from private schools don't have two heads anyway - they just have parents who have been able to priorities their education against other things.

I'm being a bit lighthearted here, but seriously, take a look, go on an open day and see if it feels right - these things just click sometimes. Best of luck!

Thanks Beckandcall. DD's music teacher told us a friend of his went to Oxford and couldn't stand the pressure and really wished he had chosen somewhere with longer terms so less intense. We will go and look though so thanks for the advice.

And good luck to your DD with her offers!

hello, just popping in as I'm a relatively recent Cambridge graduate and I'm happy to answer any questions. My DD is only 9mo so I can't help on the associated parenting dilemmas But anything about the university/colleges.

Oxbridge is also attractive because of the collegiate system - you have university lectures and exams, but college small-group teaching which can be one-to-one. Some people find that stifling; some people thrive on it.

The collegiate system also allows less sporty/musical/dramatic/whatever people to compete and train at that level. A big university might have three men's hockey teams (say) but a medium-sized college. Which means you only need to be one of the best twenty out of four hundred, rather than out of ten thousand, to get a chance of regular play.

Ahem.

But a medium sized college might have two.

Hi HellsBells. My DS is applying as Cambridge is the only place which offers the exact course he wants to do. I think you're right to raise the short terms/intense study aspect of Oxbridge, but that's something else which appeals to DS rather than putting him off.

It also makes the accommodation cheaper, from what we've seen so far, because you're paying for fewer weeks of each year.

Hi Hellsbells, my DS applied to Cambridge because the course is reputed to be the best, and he didn't want to have the regret of not applying, just in case. He is really not sure that he would accept an offer from them anyway, but would love to know that he had the offer, IYSWIM!
I really like the idea that there is so much support available there. However, I have my reservations, as my sister's best friend went to Oxford, and often wishes she went elsewhere to have had a healthier work/life balance. I am trusting that they will only accept him if they are sure he could handle the course, and the pressure of the environment there.

Thanks for all the replies. Food for thought etc. Good luck to all your DCs and all their applications. DD2 is actually considering medicine so oxbridge may not be the choice for her.