A Level Anxiety

[Toffee22]

Only 4 more "sleeps" until the A level results come out - not that I will be doing much sleeping...

Eldest son wants to study medicine. 3 "A's" required no slip ups allowed. Have just checked and most medical schools don't accept re-sits. How can I face looking at the cold hard facts at some point on Thursday. I'm sure it will be difficult for my son too! When I tried to talk to him about it today instead of a response he said he would do an "impression of a tree". It wasn't even a very good impression. What does this mean?

Happily XDH took DD and three friends on holiday last week and they only get back tonight so only one night of hysteria for me. Personally I am over it as far as the actual results go - it'll all work out fine in the end - but I am dreading her reaction if she doesn't get the ABB she needs.

Yes, I look forward to the GCSE thread after tomorrow's results. DD is becoming very snappy this last week and has burst into tears a couple of times about minor things but insists that she is not worried about next week as it's too late to worry now - infact I quote "oh are the results next week?" ..... yeah right!

I get my AS results tomorrow. Definatly going to need tomorrow. Either to drown my sorrows or celebrate. Either way

this might be jumping the gun abit... but it might be an idea to check on your first choice university and insurance choice to see what they've said about clearing. I've just looked on my university's website and there's alot of information plus step by step instructions as to what to do if you have been confirmed a place, or if you haven't; whether you are a current or new applicant (because you were late or other reasons); and what to do re clearing. The hotline for many places is probably already up and running.

Good luck.

Thanks for that idea, drcrab. I checked out DS2's - his firm just says come back on 18th, but his insurance lists the departments that are likely to have places in clearing & one of those might do at a pinch.

(I've been finding it weird how tense I am about him, as he is DC4, but none of his siblings went straight to university at 18 so I'm actually a complete novice at this )

How bad can it get? When I'd just finished y12, a friend got his results and they were disappointing so he jumped off a multi story car park - some rumours of a suicide pact at school. Awful. Am now waiting for A2s for DS1 and am so stressed... This thread is (mostly) fantastic at making me feel a little better. Can't mention my darkest fears of course, but said yesterday that whatever happens we love him and he said that would really help in job applications!

What we need is a big long list of the all the really successful people we know, either personally or in the public eye who DIDN'T go to university, and use them of examples of how opportunities to be successful in life are not just about the connections you have, or the school you went to, or the qualifications you hold, but about something you can only find inside yourself.

I've just managed to get DS to sit down for an hour and we've made all the relevent notes, taken names and phone numbers etc, and made contingency plans for tomorrow and he seems to be being a bit more focused on his Plan B strategy now.

Luckily his flight is very early and it's only to Amsterdam, so he'll be in his hotel, phone, laptop and 'sales pitch' at the ready by the time I have his results envelope in my hand, just in case it all goes tits up in Track!

I am feeling calmer now. I am feeling muuuuuch calmer.

Ooh, I've got a good story like that, although I'll vague up the details as I think the DW of one is a MNetter. They're family members (two brothers).

B1 failed his O levels, stayed in bed for a week until his DM kicked him out of it and told him to get a job or leave. He found a really basic job in a city office and worked his way up. After thirty years he runs his own company (used to travel all over Europe with the original company), had the most amazing wedding I've ever been to (top London hotel... I was fifteen and a bit ), a flat in the City, a house in the countryside and a beautiful wife and daughter (okay, the latter has nothing to do with academics but is a lovely ending ).

B2 had everything paid for by his parents including several years of professional training/education at university. He's drifted through life and, until quite recently, was still asking for handouts.

B1 went to a bog standard school, had no connections or qualifications - he's just a very nice man, good at connecting with people and a very, very hard worker. My DM always used to use the two as an example to me of how a university education doesn't guarantee you anything but hard work usually will.

DD is expecting her results, but thank God, after months are going through the process, she was told a couple of weeks ago that she had been given a 12 month contract with the team organising the huge event planned in London next year! It's taken some pressure off, but she's now worried that even if she gets the grades (not at all certain!), the unis may not defer her place until 2012. Neither were particularly helpful when she spoke the them last week. At least it's not immediate panic.

DS was our problem last year - needed AAA for Durham and got A*AB. They kept he waiting for 5 days before finally saying no, but the good news is that he is really happy at Sheffield, and things have worked out well.

Good luck to all your DC.

Agree sieglinde and all the worse because the C would be alphabetically sorted by UCAS so that it's slap bang in the middle of his A*'s....

DD said she wouldn't dare take up your phoning suggestion btw and is now jumping every time the phone rings, which is often!

Exactly, Yellowstone. He's holding 3 A*s already, and he's predicted more (of 10, all except English and Mandarin - the former is an A prediction as people here know because he's not great at writing like Clarkson and Coren), but his stupid C might yet make it all go tits up.

Fellatio - I buggered about at school, got into punk rock and couldn't wait to get out at 16. That said - O level grades were good with no work. I never considered sixth form - don't think I even realised it was an option and the only person who encouraged me to stay on was the drama teacher, as she wanted me in the 6th form production - no other reason (always been a drama queen!). I had various office junior jobs, which progressed to secretarial work as I grew up a bit, but no FE qualifications. At the age of 40 I was ready to consider my further education. Working full time as a teaching assistant (I was promoted from my dinner lady post!), with 2 DCs, I commenced my degree in Education, got a 2:1 and last year secured a place on the highly sought after Graduate Teacher Programme. At the tender age of 47, I have just qualified and am commencing my NQT year this September (then you won't see me on the forums for dust as I drown in planning, marking, APP, etc, etc). So add me to your list of successful people please: the world is our DCs oyster, whenever they are ready to embrace it.

I'll just throw this into the ring (though could be a whole new thread) - what constitutes "successful" ?

Well that background sounds pretty much like me carpwidow. I was always told I was bright but I lacked application and concentration and found school dull beyond belief. My home life was a bit chaotic so no-one noticed if I bunked school. I went to art college at 16 to do a BTEC diploma with little intention of going to uni afterwards (I barely knew what university was; no-one at my school went although many were bright enough, it just wasn't an expectation any of our teachers or our parents had.) Then I left home very young, needed to apy the rent, so fell into a succession of unfulfilling office jobs which I was fairly crap at due to them being boring, and me thinking I was something special, destined for better things if only I knew what and at I'm 45 and still fannying around 'thinking' about my future.

Luckily for me DH is very successful, so I just leech off him instead.

For me, success is being financially self sufficient, capable of supporting yourself and your family, and able to enjoy a lifestyle that makes you feel happy and secure, in a job that fulfills you and challenges you.

If it makes you rich and well respected into the bargain, so much the better, but that's not the most important thing.

I know someone who left school with just one CSE (something akin to a single foundation level GCSE these days) to his name, who eventually set up his own business and has done very well. Qualifications open some doors, but many people do very well without them.

That's it in a nutshell - having the resources to enjoy a lifestyle that makes you feel happy and secure, whatever that may be - Maslow's hierarchy I reckon.

Of course there are lots of other things than university, especially for dcs who actually prefer being with peers to being with books. Thing is, though, my dcs are not really likely to embark on the kind of careers in which I could see some posters here flourishing. They are - erm - a tad introverted.

I left school with only a couple of CSE's at grade 1. I'd got my priorities wrong and was more interested in spending time with my boyfriend than school work, was also bullied because of said boyfriend being cute. Ironically he dumped me the day I left school which was at the first opportunity.

Went to college and got a job in admin for an accountancy firm. My boss saw potential in me and trained me up on the job. Went back to school and did an A level which was a breeze. Ended up doing further qualifications and although I haven't had a high flying career, I have managed to be a home owning, independent single mum.

This is the reason I am encouraging DD to go to university. Not one teacher at the same school she attends told me I could do it all those year ago. I didn't see it even though I was sat alongside the brainy ones in the top forms. My parents didn't think uni was for the likes of us either.

She really wants to go, incase anyone thinks I'm re-living my unfulfilled life through her.

Carpwidow, well done on your achievements. I'm slightly older than you but already trying to work out how I can retire.

Sieglinde, some teens are just made for the university experience, some are really outgoing etc will do well anyway.

I'm loving this thread and I thank dementedma for making me think about why I am supportive but anxious parent .

Is there room for me!

My DD is just sticking her head in the sand and says if things go wrong she'll deal with them tomorrow. I on the otherhand have got a list of contacts for her firm and insurance, a copy of her personal statement and will be up early to get a copy of the telegraph. And a big box of tissues.

I think my DD will miss her firm offer as she needs AAA but messed the maths exams up so may end up with AAB, i havent told her this though. Is there anything she should say or do when pleading with the university to make her stand out (and anything that is a big no no.)

Have a look through this (lengthy) thread SM@H. There are lots of helpful tips and some of them from Uni admissions officers. The biggest piece of advice coming from those in the know is make sure she does it herself - not you. Think it's all going to be a bit mad in the morning.

Thanks carpwidow I will have a good read through when the younger 2 have got out of my hair later. Dont worry she wont let me anywhere near to help at all and she really wants to go to her firm so wouldnt do anything that may put them off. Is it too early for a

Definitely not - I've been drinking since Easter. Cheers

If only we could be as calm as some of the students!