Should I contact DD’s primary school to explain she’s bright before she starts in September?

[OutnumberedDad]

I had a lot of excellent feedback from this forum two years ago regarding my dd (thread linked at the bottom) and I’m dipping back in for more advice please.

DD4 starts school in September and my wife and I are confused if we should contact her primary school in advance to explain that she’s quite able, particularly at maths?

DD is the bright “hears it, gets it and remembers it” sort of child. She has good literacy skills and can read basic books but she prefers being read to. She will definitely benefit from working through properly taught phonics so even though she’ll be a little bit ahead I’m not sure I’d even mention this.

However, in maths, she really shown a very good mathematical brain. Inspired by Numberblocks (watching it with DD2 reignited her interest) and spending more time with us in lockdown, she’s really immersed herself into the world of numbers.

She loves watching videos on YouTube to learn and she knows her times tables up to 12 x 12. Although some of that is rote, she can add double digit and single digit numbers applying the patterns she’s spotted in the times tables and without the need to count on. She loves to use maths to compare all of our ages, working out how old family members will be when she is x years old etc.
She can also double and half effectively by breaking the numbers in to parts (eg 23 + 23 = 20 + 20 and 3 + 3) and she has grasped things like division and remainders and working out 97 + 7 = 104 or 997 + 7 = 1004 so her understand of place value is quite good without being “taught” (we have tried to answer her questions by explaining things a little bit but nothing formal or curriculum based)

All of this is gladly very normal in this setting which I am very grateful for and you will also know that I’m not bragging when I say these things.

Essentially, for the most part, a lot of the first couple of years of dd’s maths aren’t going to be very useful. DD is happy and fairly confident but not showy so she may blend in to her surroundings and quietly get on with work that she has already mastered. She will absolutely benefit from the routine setting of reception. I just don’t want her to get stifled in maths and feel maybe I should give her teacher a subtle heads up if possible.

Ordinarily, I think I would mention this to her teacher in the home visit, but there are a few issues:

We may not have a home visit or a normal transition for dd due to COVID-19
Schools have a lot of pressing priorities at the minute which I am mindful of
I am a secondary maths teacher and I really don’t want to be that pushy parent from Day 1!!
A teacher doesn’t always appreciate being told how to do their job before it’s even started.

What do you all think that I should do?

Many thanks and apologies if there are any typos!

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/gifted_and_talented/3182253-Another-gifted-at-2-y-o-thread-You-bet

No, don’t. The teacher will work it out. There’s lots of other things for your daughter to learn in reception.

Even if there isn't a home visit I can't imagine there will be zero contact with her teacher at all before she starts so I would just mention it then.

What a clever little girl you have there!

I would mention it to the teacher, I suspect you'll het an opportunity to email or meet with them at some stage before she starts.
Find out what they'll be learning maths wise at school and jusy try to keep her interest alive

Good luck

There's no need. I'm sure the teacher will notice

I have an 8yo who is gifted at maths. She will sit and do her 11yo sisters homework with ease. But the schools take on it is that they cannot excel her as all children must learn at the same level. They don't jump school years here. And I'm fine with that. She isn't as brilliant at reading and writing, but is on par with her peers. So I really don't think there is any point mentioning it to school as they will treat her the same as every other child in her class. Private schools may view it differently.

I'm not sure you'd need to mention anything. My DS (although not in any way super bright) had taught himself to read ages before he started school. They noticed straightaway and had a chat with me about it a few weeks in. The kids all work at different levels within one class anyway, so he just worked on more challenging stuff for a while. He's probably still the best reader and speller in his class but in some other areas he has to work really hard, so it all evens out IME.

Your little girl sounds very clever - I'm sure she'll love school

No, I might say that she enjoys maths but I wouldn't highlight her at this stage as it might sound as if you are wanting special attention for her. Also some of the things they assess on she might not have covered. Let her settle in without expectations and feel happy that it is part of the curriculum she doesn't need to worry about.

I would mention it casually if you get the chance in a oh, she loves maths way. So if you have a call with the teacher, or they ask for an ‘all about me’ sheet to be filled in. Otherwise just leave it, they will soon work it out. If I’m 6 months they don’t seem to be working her to an appropriate level then I would raise it with the school.

DS1 was very able. He could read anything including things like lord of the rings type language by the time he was 3, and was very good at maths, obsessed with adding large numbers together. I didn’t mention it but the school soon picked up on it had him assessed and his reading age was 14+ when he was 4. They then put him in learning groups with older kids, his year 1 teacher created a special spelling challenge game for him when the others were doing spellings etc.
My point is let the school have a chance to meet her, assess her and provide a suitable education. You will soon know if they are treating her as an individual or just rote learning to the whole class at which point you can step in and ask for more.

No, if she is that bright they'll work it out quickly.

Does she want to go to school? Could you home educate her? Sounds like you've done a great job of this so far.

I know I'll get jumped on for this, but really, I don't think she'll get anything out of school academically. Even my moderately clever but not gifted or talented son found it very boring with repetition of loads of stuff that he found pointless and could already do.

She might enjoy the institutional type of socialisation that she'll get at school but there is plenty of opportunity for socialisation in the home education community (depending on where you live - you might struggle in very remote areas).

I'm not anti-school by the way just more of a one-size-doesn't fit all type of person. I currently have one child in school and one child who is home educated for this reason.

Of course, if both parents work, this is much more difficult.

Perhaps it depends on the school, but in my experience absolutely don't mention it!

My DS is freakishly clever (high functioning autism with an astonishing maths ability) but any time I so much as hinted that he might be above average and was there perhaps some slightly more challenging work he could be given since he was bored witless the school rolled their eyes, and I soon learned not to mention it as they were only interested in the children who were struggling - I just think they didn't have the capacity/teachers to deal with the really bright kids.

Interestingly, when he got 100% on all of his SATS papers, not only was the primary school suddenly interested in him, but the high school were all over him like a rash - in high school clever children are actively encouraged and given harder work as it benefits the school to have children who get excellent GCSE results.

Hi OP, we will be doing virtual home visits for our new reception children. Your DD’s school will have worked out a way to have contact with families before September so I’m sure you will get a chance to talk to her teacher.

We had similar here with maths skills way beyond his years. I didn’t say anything. There was plenty to keep his busy head full and the fact that he wasn’t learning anything in maths wasn’t a problem at all. Eventually after the school had had time to get to know him we all sat down together and worked out a plan.

I wouldn’t

Nope. Dont contact them just to mention it.
DS2 moved schools at the end of year 3. It took them less than a week to work out his maths was above average, and give him stretch work. And he's no where near the level of your daughter in terms of being ahead. His previous school were also well aware. Unless the child actively hides their ability, the teacher will notice it.

No you don't need to, they will quickly find out. My DD and I think quite a few could read well and knew all times tables on starting reception so not really unusual. Number blocks are great are they not? Let her enjoy school play is also important.

They will notice! My experience with my dd was the teachers mentioning it to me.

Best not to - they will spot her and I am sure every other parent will be telling them the same!

I hope she loves school!

Don't you have detailed forms to fill out prior to her starting? That would seem to be a good place for this. Ditto, if the home visit doesn't happen, I suspect it will be replaced with a call, so you can talk then.

I admit, I came onto this thread rolling my eyes as I expected you to be one of those parents who feels as your child can already count to 100 they need special treatment. But this does seem like a lot and I think it's worth flagging to the school via whatever pre-school feedback mechanisms will be in place.

Also, if she really is this good at maths at 4, I suspect (but know nothing about this) that you may need to consider special programmes for her etc down the line.

Do you really think they wouldn't notice if it wasn't flagged in advance?!

I wouldn’t mention it before school starting, but there will be a parents evening in the first term and I would neutrally check to see how much THEY had noticed before mentioning it in that setting.

I’m a teacher, but secondary. I appreciate a heads up when I have a Y7 starting who has a particular strength for my subject, it’s nice information to bear in mind. You won’t be a “pushy parent” unless you’re expecting particular special treatment. With maths, it’s often relatively easy to provide extension work if you have a kid that works well independently, but it might not be possible to do much initially because I imagine a 4 year old won’t be much interested in sitting and working from a book?

(FWIW, I understand why you’re hesitant. My 3yo is no great stick at numbers (she’s 3, so no shock to me!), but I wonder if I should flag up to her teacher that she can read..... she’s always been fascinated by books, so has taken me by surprise and now reads whole sentences quite well. Her preschool teacher is still showing her individual letters and asking her what sound they make. I’m not going to rock the boat this term, but if things are more back to normal for September I’ll say something)

Does your school have parents evenings? Our primary used to have them every half term. I think I would wait until the first one of those if they do have them as you don't know how she is going to settle into school work and life.

If not, I would go down the "casual Mentioning it" route. Phrase it that you are concerned she will coast to avoid standing out.

I think the start of school is stressful enough for a child without the added "burden" of being singled out for harder maths IYSWIM.