Going up a year, any experience of this?

[SirVixofVixHall]

My dd isn't madly happy at Primary and it has been suggested by a few different people that she might be happier going up to high school a year early. She is 9 now, ten soon, year 5. I think we have thought of most of the major points, but we are having a chat with the two heads next week, so do any of you have experience of this? Would be helpful to know the pros and cons really.

I wouldn't do it ,childhood is much more than simply education. My dd is very bright she is also a September baby. I am very grateful as she is now 16 and in year 11 that she gets an extra year of being a " child". You don't get your childhood back and it is such a short time. If you do everything a year early you effectively lose a year.

DD's boyfriend (December birthday, just 19yo) was accelerated in primary school and went to secondary school aged still 10. He is very bright, and mature for his age, but when I asked him whether he felt it was a good idea, he said he wouldn't do it to his own children. Academically he hasn't done badly and is at an Oxbridge college now, but he wishes he hadn't had such a poor experience at secondary school level.

I've had a lot of concerns over my children's schooling over the years, and tbh we have moved them around a lot to avoid what you describe, but I've never countenanced moving them up a year. Dnephew was moved up a class when he was still very young (in France) and I don't feel it's been a success for him- he is now 16 and in Terminale (year 13), and his maturity definitely hasn't kept pace with his knowledge. I'd err on the side of thinking it's not really a good thing socially and emotionally for children, but of course there are always exceptions.

A selective school and enrichment are, IMVHO, infinitely preferable to acceleration.

In my experience - I am in France like duchesse - skipping is almost always successful when initiated by the school; the results are much more mixed when it is initiated by the parents (sometimes against the school's best judgement).

At secondary school, being skipped is easier for girls who mature early, harder for girls who are later to mature, and for boys (unless their birthday falls close to the cut off as my son's does). I think the social and emotional differences caused by an age difference of under 6 months are vastly overstated once you get to the teenage years, as the age difference is swamped by differences between individuals. Children and adolescents also tend to mature (or not mature) partly as a function of their environment - there are several children in my nearly 12 year old's Y8 class who are older than my DD 13 but you would be hard pushed to identify them unless you knew.

I agree though that enrichment is generally better and it can also help to add out of school activities.

I should mention that DD's bf went up a year within the UK state system. As such, he was the only one in his year and his school. In France he might have been one of a handful, and there almost certainly would have children older than average (ie who'd been held back) by sec school age.

Umm. Fence sitting. My 3 are academically able and the younger 2 tended to have more older friends than peers as they couldn't really get the bitchiness etc. primary top years were awful but secondary was much better.

However would they have been better up a year? Academically they would have been fine. Socially ok - but dh was quite sporty and I'm not sure how outside school copetitions based on age would work ...

But- and interestingly it was significant for her- the eldest is very young in her year and the rites of passage at 17/18 - driving / drinking / clubbing/ getting a part time job etc were clearly delayed for her and had she been even younger it would have been terrible.

I think you'd need a gap year prior to uni too as going at 17, not legally able drink or go out, would be an utter pain unless you are happy to always be left out.

Also if you go out of year it'll almost always be private. Dh has taught primary and prep. Out of year state kids transfer at 11 regardless ( this was an Sen child who was educated a year below and it was fine - fortunately went to special school so didn't matter) but the up a year prep kids - about one every 2years transfer at 10.

Rites of passage/ university considerations are definitely something to bear in mind - an issue for my dd who will probably return to study in the UK. She will sit her baccalaureat at 15/16 and we will probably be looking for her to lose a year before university entrance.

I was moved up a year when I was about 7 and it worked really well, but I am a September birthday so no obvious physical differences. I was a bit socially immature and tended to have more friends in the year below, but it was never a big issue. Unlike the poster above I've always felt I gained an extra year of life as a result - much more fun to enter adult life a bit early than be stuck for another year at a primary school where I was bored and frustrated.

Most universities are not keen on having 17-year-olds knocking around so I'd definitely plan for a gap year, but that shouldn't be a problem.

I skipped a year at 8 - went from year 3 to year 5. I am an April birthday so at the younger end of the year anyway which made for a big gap, with some children up to 19 months older than me. Luckily I hit puberty early (started periods at 11, so pretty much in sync with my class average of around 12.5/13) so physically it was never obvious, and academically it was never a problem, but didn't make much of a difference either. I stayed ahead all the way through, including university. I was unhappy at school though and the skip didn't seem to help with that - I still craved much older friends/company.

I wouldn't do it with my own children I don't think. I can absolutely see why you are tempted but I think the social risks are real and the academic advantages usually overstated - I mean that if the skip makes a significant difference to the academic problem, then the DC probably wasn't advanced enough in the first place to make the social risks worthwhile; and if the DC is far enough ahead/frustrated enough to make the social risks seem worth it, a single year skip is unlikely to make a significant difference. I remember my new classwork being interesting for a couple of weeks while I caught up and then reverting immediately to what-a-waste-of-my-time! I was extremely bored and frustrated at secondary school, and only cheered up when I moved to a very very academic school at 15. I agree with bonsoir that an academic school and a good enrichment programme are more important. But I appreciate that your options may be limited.

I think I would be slightly more likely to consider it if my DC were in a system where it happens more often than it does in the UK: e.g. my DH is French and also skipped a year but it was more normal in the schools he was in, and children were also regularly held down a year or even two. Also French schools (at least when he was at school) didn't really do any of the hobbies/clubs/sport/music/drama stuff that many UK schools do so being the wrong age for teams or whatever just wasn't an issue.

Also, one of my sisters wasn't skipped as such but started school early and stayed ahead. She is an early October birthday though so less of a gap. I'm not sure how she feels about it but she certainly had a pretty miserable time at school! She went to uni in Scotland where it is normal to start at 17 in any case.

I know rather a lot of French DC who have been accelerated - it is indeed quite common in France, where school is a programme of common knowledge, with a very finite end point, rather than a journey of self-development with more open-ended possibilities.

Well I am really appreciating all the viewpoints. Plenty to think about. soontobesix- that is one of my biggest concerns, I don't want her rushed towards adulthood But my DH feels she is an unstoppable force, and that however much we want her to be still a primary school child, that she herself has moved on.
bonsoir-I agree with you, that a different type of school plus enrichment would be best. However that isn't an option, unless we re-locate, which would also then mean a very different type of childhood for my dds. The rural location hasn't seemed a problem for the very bright girls I know locally who have just gone off to university or drama school, possibly because the high school is such an academic one that they felt challenged and fulfilled. I do sometimes agonise about moving, but I have a younger child who is really happy, and an elderly mother in a care home close by who would also not take well to being moved, aside from friends of my own etc- it is very difficult.
kalidsa- I think that is a good point, that was also made by a pp, that if a child is bright enough to go up a year then a year isn't really enough, and if it is, then they could just as well be staying where they are. I suppose in our case, it isn't as much that she would be stretched by going up one year, it is that the place she would go to would be far more stimulating overall, and she is ready to be somewhere bigger and more challenging. If she stays in primary I think she will have a pretty unhappy year next year in particular. The whole situation with her school doesn't help, we don't have a head, she has been suspended, (no-one knows why) and we have an acting head who is doing his best, working like a dog to get everything done, and bringing in some great new ideas, but the school is in turmoil and understaffed. It will take at least another year for the situation to be resolved apparently.
My DH hasn't read the thread yet, but I am going to ask him to go through it as he may have other questions or a different take on the responses. Anyway, again, I am very grateful as every single post has been helpful, and I appreciate you all taking the time to think about our dilemma and write a post.

We're about to do this with our daughter, currently in Y5. She'll skip Y6 and go into next Y7 next September. She's autumn-born (we're in the UK), so is presently one of the oldest of her year, and so will only be a month or so younger than the youngest in her new peer group.

I'd agree that every case is different. My dd is socially mature, and her new school has CAT tested her and are happy that she can deal with the academic side. She was working at the cusp of Level 5 at the end of Y4, and we felt she'd just be treading water during a year of cramming for Y6 SATS, so we asked her older sister's school if they'd take her a year early. Once they'd established that the academic case stacked up, they were happy to consider, and eventually agree, our proposal.

She has also been H-ed for about half of the primary years, interestingly.

You know your daughter best, so are the best judges of how well she'll deal with the various challenges a year skipped will bring about.

Dd thrived socially after being moved up - but tall for age. Headteacher's choice in France and I was strongly advised to say yes.

Now back in UK and in correct age group and no longer the same motivated child. Bored and wanted to get moved up a year again - not done here. Her solution - dumbing herself down to fit in. Socially is fine and loves sport so that helps. Just accepts that school work doesn't go into depth she wants.

If teachers think it is a good plan I would go for it. I was a yr young from 6, tall, no one ever realised as didn't say, and not a problem. Still bored at school though.

CSLewis, that is interesting, thank you. We don't have SATS here, so that isn't an issue, but as with your DD, I fear mine would be just treading water too if she stays for year 6. (And worse, becoming even more disengaged with school) . I am sure this was a tricky decision for you too, so what helped you come to the point where you felt sure it was the right course to take? I am struggling to come to an absolute decision. DH is more strongly pro her going than I am, he isn't certain yet, and he is quite willing to be swayed, but so far he feels nothing has disuaded him from his feeling that it is the best choice for DD given the current situation.

I'm afraid this is no help to you, but what helped us feel confident in our decision was our faith in the school, and staff, we were sending her to. We are exceptionally lucky in this school: it's very young, very small as yet, and we have a very close working relationship with the Head and Senior Management, with whom we are on exactly the same page. The pastoral care they offer their pupils is fantastic, so I am very confident they will be keeping a close eye on our Dd, and we'll be working closely together to manage any issues that may arise.

Were this not the case, I'd probably have felt many more qualms than I do now. That is no help in your situation, though - sorry!

Well, no, actually that is a help in a way, as although the school we will probably send dd to is quite different from that (and I wish we had the option of yours as it sounds wonderful!) , I do have faith that they have the experience and the skills to manage the situation and support dd. We are going to go back there next week and ask more questions about how they would help her, so perhaps we do have similar feelings to you as to how the situation could be dealt with in a positive way. If they can't give her the support and care I feel she will need then we will consider either home ed for the year 6 or staying on in primary but with some extra support if we can get it.
So thanks for the second post, as it has been more helpful than you thought, and has given me a feel for a way towards a decision. Although the local authority have the absolute say, so we have to wait for them to agree even if we want to go ahead. Apparently dd has to have an ed-psych assessment too, so the results of that will be a factor which is a bit of a worry.

Both dB and I started early. DB let 2 DC out of 4dc skip a year. In fact youngest skipped 2 years. Not heard of any problems. One still at uni, one finished.

Good luck with it all, SirVix - let us know how it goes.

I did this, way back in the day, as I was academically quite far ahead of most of my class, and my year was crowded whereas the year above had much smaller classes. It seemed like a sensible move, but in reality it was absolutely bloody hideous, and I would not visit it on any child of mine.

ArcheryAnnie- in what ways was it so dreadful? Your post has really worried me tbh, as it sounds as though you had a much worse time than other posters who went through it. I am trying to think over all the possible drawbacks as they will help us choose as much as the possible positives. Were you on the young side in your year? And did you stay ahead or come back into your year group? If you don't mind me asking.

CSLewis, I will post with whatever the outcome is, it isn't just our choice as the EA has to agree even if we want to go ahead, and of course they may say no. I have put it slightly to one side over Christmas but we will be right back in the thick of decision making next week. I feel very stressed now, I really don't know how to come to a decision on this, as the possible outcomes are so hard to predict. I am going to try to finish the Iowa Acceleration scale questions tomorrow. Sometimes the weight of being a parent feels very heavy indeed.

SirVix I was on the older end of my "natural" year, but that still left me as the very, very youngest in my accelerated year, of course.

The main problem - which newer accelerations may have a solution to - is that it doesn't matter how smart you are, you still need to learn things in order to do work at a higher level. So as I was parachuted straight into a year above, missing an entire year, I missed out on the lessons I needed in order to cope with the accelerated learning. I caught myself up in a term anyway, but it really wasn't fun. Not only was I a year younger chronologically, I just hadn't had the instruction the others in my new class already had. I didn't have the option of learning it at a natural pace, together with my peers, from a teacher - I had to scramble to find my own way and catch up by myself.

Then, when I got to the end of this school and was moving upwards, the next school would not accept someone a year too young, so I had to repeat my final year. I cannot describe how very, very bored I was for an entire year, repeating stuff I'd already done before with people who were doing it for the first time.

If there was a chance of having to re-do a year (last year in primary) then I would say it is a waste of time. However in my "original" country" that would not happen.
My sister let her ds skip a year which was a disaster. Difference between brother's girls (who skipped 1 and 2 years) and sister's is I think their difference in "maturity", not academic ability.

I was both "mature" (difficult home life left me very independent) and academically able, but my school was not set up for a good accelerated programme, which is possibly why I hated it so very much.

Also, is acceleration a normal thing where you are? Because I was an odd experiment of the school, not a usual practice, and being the odd one out is not always a comfortable place to be.