mnistooaddictive. I do have something constructive to say, YOU just aren't engaging. I have plenty of experience of having children with very high IQs. I sought help for my ds1's issues and got a diagnosis that didn't actually fit any of the problems I was actually seeking help for, which were: hypotonia (that's a description, apparently, not a medical diagnosis, because it can have multiple causes); hypermobility (he was actually diagnosed with ehlers-danlos syndrome for this one); motor tics (these are very common apparently, as an isolated and relatively short-term condition, in perfectly normal children and more common in children with aspergers, obsessive compulsive disorder or generalised anxiety disorder); sensory sensitivities (this is common in children with very high IQs and in children with aspergers, but unless so severe as to be the overriding factor causing your child's problems, doesn't normally form part of a diagnosis, just a description of a symptom common to many neurological issues); mild anxiety (lots of children get anxious for all sorts of reasons, it's also more common in gifted children and in aspergers and as a co-morbidity with tourettes and other ticcing disorders, and funnily enough, more common in assocation with connective tissue disorders); slightly odd motor co-ordination, but not in a pattern that fits dyspraxia (perfect co-ordination once taught how to do something, but not seeming to find some skills come as naturally to him as they do to most children, despite an exceptionally high IQ - again more common in aspergers and in connective tissue disorders, and there's a possible, theoretical link between aspergers and connective tissue disorders...). A formal diagnosis helped not one iota for the huge array of main issues my child has and which affect his daily life. If there were such a thing as a "gifted" diagnosis it would fit him better than anything else, but there ISN'T. The best you can hope for if you seek formal assessment is a DESCRIPTION of giftedness, once serious, diagnosable, conditions have been ruled out. ie it is a description once diagnosis of anything has been decided against. Hence my advice that all you can seriously and realistically do is do your best to understand your own child as an individual, because you are not going to get any help in the form of a diagnosis, just a long list of descriptions of your child's traits, an IQ score and a point in the direction of the various organisations that support gifted children. And the IQ score won't open doors for you in the way you appear to think - just ask anyone on this board.
In conclusion, you are doing the right thing by your child by looking to external organisations, books and other people to help you try to understand and support your child, if you are feeling lost and uncertain as to how to help her, but you would not be helping her cause by seeking a diagnosis. I wasted several years seeking a diagnosis of something for my child and all I got were diagnoses of things I didn't perceive to be a problem, and no doors automatically opened to help me deal with the real problems.