**TAMOXIFEN** 4th thread

[MaryAnnSingleton]

here we go !

exam time ! am sending him vibes right now !!

I have been sending vibes - how long does it go on for?

I can almost hear him singing away. Bless. Hope he isn't too nervous, I always think boys that age look so vulnerable when you catch them doing something earnestly, like this. It's a good job I had a girl i don't think I could have coped with the bundle of nerves that is a teenage boy. Girls are tough as old boots by comparison.

Any news?

Great support on the courgette front ladies! Thanks - I've been out and sprayed with milk/water so will see what happens. The flowers look pretty - will try to find fancy Italian recipe for flowers in a light batter - did you even see that? Sounds and looks yum, but I've never made it.

Thanks also for the tips re skin. Cakes, I'll certainly shout if I need those dressings! Thanks for the offer.

MAS - hope singing went very well.

Love to all.

ds reports that it went ok (it was from 2.15-2.30 -they sing 3 songs,and one unaccompanied piece & sight reading too. ) He brought home his certificate from his first exam -so I guess we'll see how he did in a few more weeks time...thanks for good vibes !
glad the courgettes have been treated with their milk spray - i've had fried courgette flowers and they are delicious !
Love to everyone x
oh,forgot to say - my grief counselling starts on Friday - they are coming here-am relieved and nervous in equal measure !

Well done to Ds MAS, - I'm sure he did well in his exam. And good luck with the counselling on Friday - I can understand you being a bit apprehensive, but I imagine being in familar surroundings will be a good thing. will be thinking of you.

I've heard courgette flowers are nice SR, might try that with mine when they appear (rather late planted so no where near that stage yet.)Have taken note of your milk spray reccomendation Smee.

Keep an eye on the skin just in case, but good that its holding up well at the moment. (I was given the tip of wearing T-shirts inside out after rads while its healing, so seams don't rub your skin.)

Glad you survived the playdate Cakes - well done for avoiding the sleepover. I had far too many of those. (one child informed me her mother always made croissants for breakfast, when I produced toast and cereal. 'Good for her' I said, through gritted teeth)

I'm absolutely shattered today, think yesterday's early start is catching up with me. I went to yoga and swimming today, but it's left me worn out.

Love to all xx

@ croissants riposte KK !!
One friend of ds's remarked that we didn't have many 'things' in our house -when I questiomned this he meant electrical gadgets and the like - I told him that big tellys were vulgar.

silk hankies inside your bra are good btw

Oh boy, I think camping took more out of me than i realised - hence absence. It is so great being able to do things again that i tend to go overboard. Felt a bit better on Tuesday so we went pond dipping so then I have had to rest up again. grrrrr
KK - glad to hear you have DD back safe and sound. MAS - good luck for Friday.
SR - courgettes are really prone to mildew. I haven't tried milk and water but may give that a go. I usually just pick off the affected leaves before it spreads. Had my first broad beans and peas from the plot this week. they were yummy.

Smee - are you coming up to my neck of the woods on holiday? Where are you planning on going?

I have to start packing for Norway tomorrow - haven't done anything yet. All 3 cats are being packed off to the cattery - that is the only downside of going away . I'm not sure how geriatric, simple boy and high strung anorexic are going to get on cooped up with new farty kitten. He is a complete nutter and tried to take down a seagull today (at least double his size). Has also developed a liking for climbing trees. Best friend pointed out this might result in fire engine and hunky men but I am not fire services favourite person after setting off fire alarm at sports centre with DS's birthday cake candles last year. Full scale evacuation and fire engine with flashing lights the lot. Kids said it was the best party ever as they got to sit in the engine and play with the hoses.

exciting to be packing for Norway haggis, but sorry you are a bit worn out after your activities Hope the cats will be alright in their cattery -kitten sounds like a complete loon ! @ your birthday cake and firemen story !

re firemen story!

V jealous of Norway trip.

Kids do say quite rude things when they come round, don't they? at KK's riposte. I have to say I have been quite rude in the past and said "well woop-de-doo". It's not very grown up of me, is it.

This time the kid commented on all the tea arrangements (I should really have asked what she liked, but the visit was sprung on me and I was very busy so decided she could just take whatever i could muster at short notice) - then asked if she could have her carrots mashed into her potatoes. I was getting a bit exasperated so I said "well if you can mash 'em yourself it's fine by me, but I don't think I can be bothered"

DD's friends ARE getting slowly better, I suppose they are just a bit feral when they are small.

MAS - ds's exam eas quite short then - I was vibing for far longer than necessary. Hope he does well. Lots of luck for the grief counselling, brave of you to go for it, so well done already!

am sure extra vibing will be very helpful anyway -thanks Cakes !

KK croissants made me smile too.

Haggis, we're borrowing a friend's house in Hexham, so that's our base then we'll run round from there - am guessing the weather will play a major factor in terms of what we do, but any suggestions really welcomed! Am jealous of your Norway trip though. Have always wanted to go.

Your kitten sounds fab. Am thinking I'd like another, though not sure our current cat would approve. Mind you, he seems to think he's a small boy, so probably wouldn't notice. He was playing football this morning and was better than DS.

Am off on an adventure now. Lovely friend has organised for me to see a Hypnotherapist to try and counter the chemo nausea I've been getting. Am a bit sceptical, but then again would be lovely to get away from the sickness as it's my main SE. If he says 'look into my eyes', I most definitely won't be able to keep a straight face.

Hypnotherapy could be just the thing. Let us know how you get on I have always fancied it. DH has had it a couple of times when he has been a bit depressed and it has definitely helped.

The farting kitten does sound great, doesn't it? (apart from the smell, obv) Almost tempts me into getting one. OFFICIAL: RABBITS ARE BORING. I should know, we have 2.

Hope the hypnotherapy is helpful smee - my BIL is one and sent me a cd of him doing his 'look into my eyes,not around the eyes etc' thing which I find a bit disconcerting as they tend to speak in a lilting,soothing voice, different from their usual one ! also it was a bit odd having BIL 'talking' to me like this ! I have had about 5 sessions of hypnotherapy a few years ago (for anxiety) and though it helped relaxing it didn't really do anything much for anxiety. My BIL has lots of success with people wanting to stop smoking, lose weight,pain management etc

at the various stories esp the firement - must have made a really memorable party.

I am also rushing about while feeling good pre-chemo tomorrow.

Hexham will be a great base - I was brought up from birth to 18 in Northumberland. Just hope they catch this mad guy on the loose at the moment!

Anyway, if you don't know N'land these are my top tips, but depending how far you want to travel of course;

Roman Wall for fab views and outings to forts. Corbridge, Housesteads, BirdOswald and Vindolanda all well worth a visit so you could choose any. I dug at Vindolanda for 2 weeks when it was being excavated (Proud emoticon) as a teenager. Views around Housesteads are great.

Alnwick for Harry Potter theme, general feel of the town and the Duchess's Garden with treehouse.

Dunstanborough for fab castle walk right by the sea.

Farne islands for outing in fishing boat, birds, seals etc.

Warkworth , where you can walk along the River Coquet and hire a rowing boat to row along by the castle.

Craster - for the kippers of course.

Bamburgh - again lovely castle on the coast.

Plus walks around the Cheviots and moors if your family are the hiking variety.

I love the coast - lived in Amble. Nearby Alnmouth is pretty. There's'a marina at Amble but otherwise it is not very picturesque. YOu can do a boat trip to Coquet Island though. Used to be a mining town plus fishing.

These are slightly far and North from Hexham but you could consider them for day-trips.

I really love the Northumbrian moors too- all around inland is beautiful! Have a lovely time.

Hope chemo goes Ok tomorrow, SR.

Northumberland is lovely - have been to almost all those places you mentioned: if you can get a pass to go up the College Valley (you get them in a village called Wooller, from memory, but can't remember which shop) it is like stepping back in time (not many cars allowed up each day - hence the pass).

Just done 70 lengths of the pool (it's half size). have gone all purple and blotchy.

at the fireman incident Haggis - and have a great time in Norway.

Good luck with the hypnotherapist Smee - let us know how it goes, sounds interesting.

Good luck for Chemo SR, hope you are able to have a relaxing weekend afterwards.

I'm off down to my Mum's tomorrow for ten days. A sort of holiday/keeping an eye on parents thing. But its in Dorset which is always lovely. Will also be house and dog sitting for my sister. Am a little bit apprehensive ,as I haven't seen dad since last year, and Mum has been saying 'don't be upset if he doesn't recognize you or know who you are.'. so we will have to see and hope for the best.

Not sure if I will be able to get internet access, so if I'm not around, good luck and good wishes to everyone, for treatment, counselling, holidays and everything. I'll enjoy catching up on all your posts when I get back. xx

KK Have a lovely holiday. ! Thanks for good wishes re tomorrow. Tried to have bloods taken today as usual but local hopsital can't do it as not trained in using a line. Personally I think this is a bit feeble- if anything its easier using a line - like turning on a tap! Honestly.
Smee - I too will be very interested to hear about your hypnotherapy - have been thinking about this.

And good luck to anyone having treatment. Pennies - I hope your rads are going well? I am day 6 post-treatment today and so far its fine apart from a bit of minor blotchiness. I hope you're feeling better within yourself as well?

Hoping everyone is OK, especially RWU and Wubbly.

good luck tomorrow SR and have a wonderful time in Dorset KK and hope that your dad is ok and it's not too distressing -am sure he will be very pleased to have your company,your mum too.
My report of my strawberry tea has been printed in the local rag - not too many errors and all references to BCC are correct !
Letter from ds's school saying he is invited to the Celebration of Achievement to receive an award for being The Best Dressed Boy In His Year !! arf !
He also got a very good report which I'm v pleased with-am very proud of him.

Ha Smee - Hexham - hundreds of miles from me (and Portsoy) . Keep forgetting that the North means borders to English but Cape Wrath to the Scottish! I'm in Aberdeen and portsoy is on edge of Moray Firth so can't advise re Hexham at all I'm afraid but it sounds like you have had plenty of suggestions from SR anyway.

KK - hope you have a good holiday and good luck with your dad.

MAS - I am so impressed re your DS and a teensy bit as neither my DS or DH are ever likely to get anything for being smart!

Have been on the beach today toasting marshmallows on a fire we built. Both DS and I smell of smoke and there is sand everywhere but we had a great day.

I have worked out why farting kitten farts so much - he is a labrador in disguise. He eats everything and is such a scrounger. He even eats the bread I put out for the birds. So far he has stolen/eaten cheese, broccoli, chops, ham, apple pie, cream, ice cream, butter, tuna mayo and crisps. No wonder he is whiffy. We have to secure all food in the fridge or the microwave and scrape plates as soon as we are finished.

I'm off to look out my suitcases now. Good luck to all who are having treatment/counselling tomorrow.

MAS, arf indeed for your son. How funny. I still chuckle how a girl in DS's class got a certificate for 'Good work and skipping'. Great he got a good report too. Expect he's looking forward to breaking up soon. Really hope the counselling is only positive today.

KK, happy holidays. Lucky you. Expect you're gone already but have a wonderful time. The situation with your Dad must be hard. Be great for your mother to have someone to talk it all through with though. My mother has early stage Alzheimers, so I have all this to come. Scares me witless to think of seeing her disappearing in front of my eyes. Dad and I have decided to laugh a lot, which sort of helps. Hope it's not as bad as you're fearing though.

SR, I have copied and pasted all those NE thoughts into a file, so we'll be bounding round castles and along beaches you've mentioned. Am quite excited by it all, as it's a whole new world for me.
Really hope chemo today doesn't knock you sideways too much.

Haggis, sorry yes miles from me. Didn't realise you were actually in Scotland. Bit daft of me given your name! I meant NE of England. You must be hardy living in Aberdeen. That cold wind.. Farting kitten sounds fab in every way (maybe apart from the actual farts). As do fires on the beach. Can't wait for the summer holidays to start here, though must am slightly wondering where the energy's going to come from.

Sorry to report, but Hypnotherapy wasn't a great success. Was interesting, but I specifically wanted help with nausea, and he can only really help if that's psychological rather than chemical. I thought too he might help me with relaxation - am sure I'm not alone, but find it hard since diagnosis to relax (manic hamster on a wheel emoticon). He tried some hypnotherapy to see how I got on, but I couldn't switch off - which let's face it is the problem in the first place . He asked me when I 'came round', how I found it, so I had to be honest and say it hadn't worked at all. I think he thought he'd put me in a trance, whereas actually I'd been trying to stop myself thinking of what we could have for tea. Poor man looked like a kicked puppy. Ah well. Back to the Onc on Monday to see if they can find me any other drugs.

If anyone's thinking of hypnotherapy though, I wouldn't discount it. I found the person I went to a bit invasive as he wanted to start talking about childhood emotions/ trauma and all manner of other things. Thought it a bit inappropriate when I'd only gone to help with specific chemo worries. But a couple of friends with other therapists have genuinely benefitted from it, so I'd consider it again. Just not with him!

MAS - well done to ds, but I am a bit alarmed by the best dressed award. Does this mean you iron? I fear it does....

I bet KK has gone already, hope the break in Dorset is great and Dad is not too bad. He may well enjoy the company of the nice lady even if he isn't quite sure of her provenance.

Haggis- i do love the sound of fartypants - he sounds like my kind of cat. We rent a cottage in Cornwall pretty often specifically because there are two cats next door who are just like your kitten sounds. They always adopt us and spend time in our cottage - one keeps bring us half squirrels (the fluffy half) and the other leaps on our laps every time we eat and digs his claws into our wrists until we give him a bit.

Enjoy the hols smee. It sounds fab. (Hypno man sounds like he wasn't the right choice for you)

Cakes -I never iron his things !! I'm bewildered by this award !!
Sorry to hear that hypno. wasn't useful - I found myself thinking of all manner of stuff when i was 'under' - was desperately trying to concentrate but i find it pretty hard to relax.
The Cruse counsellor was really nice - I felt very comfortable with her - she was here for about an hour and she will come back next Friday -she thinks that after 4 or 5 sessions we can see how I feel and whether more are needed. I felt fine afterwards -so am very hopeful that I will make progress.
Happy holidays smee - I've just thought of that weird orange jellylike Norweigian cheese - tried some once at Waitrose - nasty.

Well that's a relief about the ironing - I had imagined MAS slaving away on the ironing board in a fashion unseen in this house (except - whisper - I do ahve alady who has done the sdults's ironing for me for the past 18 years which is fab. But not children's clothes)

Glad the counselling seems to be off to a good start MAS.

Smee - I so identify with you thinking about what to have for tea while supposedly hypnotised This is also what happens to me when I go to classical music concerts, I'm v ashamed to say. My DH can focus on the music throughout but after half an hour I too am wondering what to makle for tea! Interesting to hear your report though Smee. Enjoy your Northumbrian hols!

That orange Norwegian cheese - I'm not that keen either but I did like the way the goats lie on the road (a sort of main NOrth-South road but pretty quiet) as an advert so cars stop, pet the goats and then realise they can go up to the cheese-making farm just up the hill a bit! This happened to us in 1979 and again in 2000. The goats are very curious and practically get in the car if you let them!

Chamo with PICC line fine today. I think its the tablets on CMF that make me feel grotty so I'll start tonight. Quick question - did any of you who had CMF try taking the tablets at night in order to sleep through the worst SEs? Nurse mentioned this today but I'm worried this might concentrate the stuff too much and irriate the bladder which is a S I've avoided so far. Think I'll try one tablet at night and 2 in the morning to try to have an OK afternoon. IYSWIM. LAST TIME i SPREAD THORUGHOUT THE DAY AND SO FELT GROTTY MOST OF THE DAY. sORRY ABOUT CAPS.