contraception - difficult customer - please help

[bratnav]

OK just had DS and need to decide on contraception for the next 18 months before we TTC our last little munchkin.

Any hormonal method is out unless DH wants me to turn into a homicidal yet weepy loon. I have tried about 15 different pills over the years and none of them agree with me.

Hate hate hate condoms, both of us, to the point where there isn't much point if we use them IYSWIM.

The coil worked well for me before, but I went to get one fitted a couple of months ago and freaked out when the Dr put the speculum in I would love to have another one, but I can't see how I get past the insertion, would they give me a sedative. I do appreciate that I am being a complete wus.

Any thoughts appreciated.

You are very like me, so you are left with 2 options as far as I can tell:

• persona

or

• bumsex

Oh god have I inadvertantly started a bumsex thread????

Persona- expensive? If you don't mind me asking is that what you use, if so does it work?

I haven't used it, but friends do recommend it. At the moment I am going for option 2 an alternative approach

Will be an option as soon as that area is free of lumps

Diaphragm. Waaay better than condoms.

Cap + spermicide? Not 100% reliable and difficult to get hold of but you've not ruled it out.

Persona is the high-tech version of the rhythm method, isn't it? That'll probably be fine considering that you do want another child. Wouldn't recommend it if you deifnitely didn't want to conceive though.

Trillian, definitely not at the moment, DH has set up his own business after being made redundant and finances are seriously bleak for the moment. Also as I had a 15 month gap between DDs then a 6 year gap, I was thinking I would like a more average 2-3 year gap this time.

Do you know how efficient Persona is/how much it costs?

Also, diagphram, where would I get one, when do you have to put it in, HOW do you get it out????

Watching with interest as cannot take hormones - mine is more of a rampant puking problem.

Used condoms for 8 years but now seem to be allergic to the lubricant of most brands.

Was thinking of the coil - but also have bad periods, can't get pregnant for at least two years because of ligament stuff.

Maybe abstinance? {total freakout smiley]

If you have a sexual health clinic near you that's best for getting fitted with things like caps - they are much more used to dealing with these things. Also may want to go about a coil, out local unit is also used to dealing with rape/abuse victims and is VERY gentle, supportive and understanding as a result.

Billings Ovulation Method - way better than simple rhythm method. You'd need to find local instructor. Most Family Planning Clinics should be able to advise on this. Also contact FPC for advice on cap/diaphragm.

And yes, coil insertions can be done under sedation, however you'd have to be referred to hospital for that. You might need to fight for that...

Have you tried Progesterone-only methods, ie "mini"pill or Implanon?

Thanks Trickle and Pacific, good suggestions. Have never heard of Billings, will look into it.

Yep all hormones are out, tried combined, mini pills, implanon (removed after 2 months of black hell) even mirena coil caused me to wig out really badly.

bratnav - they are pushing for mirena if I have the coil - but I'm so scared of hormones after all the problems i had in the past. I don't trust I won't react. They also want to stick in the implant - but everytime I let them convince me this hormony thing or that hormony this is soooo much less likely to make me react, I give it a go and boom I react and they go OH is it really that bad?

YES!!!!!

I'm going to look into billings too now.

There is a 'political' push for LARC (longacting reversible contraception) mainly in an attempt to bring down teenage pregnancy rate in Britain which is sadly really v high compared to the rest of Europe.

However, if it doesn't suit, it doesn't suit. So you dig your heels in, ladies . Hope you'll find a method that works for you and agrees with you.

I can understand the reasoning, teenage pregnancy is a major problem, but I don't see how pushing hormonal contraceptives at me (a 31yo mum of 3) is going to help

Any idea how I plead for sedation? Could the large baby/traumatic birth thing work?

I don't think you need knocking out for a coil.

Why not go and see your GP and ask if you can have some diazepam to help calm you before the procedure.

Proper IV sedation would involve referral to gynae and may take a few months to arrange.

I personally wouldn't advise NFP methods unless you are open to the idea of an 'accident' or have the self-restraint of a saint during your fertile days. Also is completely unreliable if you have an irregular cycle.

Gawd, I'm so glad DH got the snip.

There is NO way I'd advise my teenage daughter to have long-term hormonal contraception inserted in her body.

Emma - I have some at home, prescribed when I had major back issues a while back, so would that work.

Expat, I agree, long tern hormones in a teenager, doesn't seem like a good idea to me. I think DH is an angel, although crazy, he offered to have the snip then have it reversed when we are ready for another

If anything, I want to groom all my kids to be religious about using condoms.

brat, we have three 6 and under.

We waited till our youngest was 1 and yep, we were still 100% sure no more.

It was going to be a big deal for me to get sterilised because we're in a rural area and it would mean an overnight stay some distance away, another GA, didn't really fancy the idea of getting my abdomen bloated up with gas (two of my friends who has super high tolerances for pain had it and they said it hurt big time) and the potential for ectopic if you fall pregnant (again, we're in a rural area).

DH was in and out in no time! Result!

Agree re condoms, it's the only sensible route for teenagers or anyone not in a long term relationship really. Snip is definitely what we are going to do when we are done, But I just don't feel done yet, is that mad when we already have 4 DC between us?

Might be worth asking your GP about the patch. It is like an sticking plaster you stick on your bum. It is hormonal but I have friends who don't get on with the pill who finds this works for them...and if it doesn't you can rip it off and try something else.

Agree it is totally inappropriate how certain forms of contraception are being pushed encouraged - on anybody and everybody.

Sadly teenage pregnancy also has a huge impact of the physical/mental/social/emotional health of a teenager and frankly there are so v many teenaged girls taking the pill (or not taking in reliable and becoming pregnant) the I do see the sense in offering them something that lasts for 3 years, yet is easily reversible.

Re sedation: some Diazepam before coil insertion is a really good suggestion . And would avoid hospital referral and having to argue your corner. Had not occured to me .

emma, Billings is suitable for women with irregluar cycles, it is not the same as the Rhythm method. But yes, you do need the restraint of a saint .

Nuva Ring is also now available.

Dunno, it's different for everyone, brat, for us, it's that as they grow, they're getting more and more expensive and they need more and more attention.

If anticipatory anxiety is an issue, diazepam is may really help. 2mg might take the edge off, 5mg should make you really chilled. Please don't drive afterwards though.

Nuvaring and Evra have similar hormone profile to the combined pill- but some women can tolerate them better.

Yes, there is a bit of political pressure to encourage LARCs, but for most women they work well and are well-tolerated. 3yrs ago I used to refer about 100 women/yr for abortions, whereas I referred 15 last year- mostly due to a big uptake of LARCs at my practice. Besides teenagers, the next highest referral group is women aged 30-35yrs- most of whom have had a baby within the past year. So, it in't just applicable to the teens.

expat, our eldest is 7 and even with a new DS it just seems to be getting easier, please don't remind me I have said this when their hormones kick in. Perhaps having 3 DDs so close in age is a blessing as they can all play together and occupy each other?

Nuva ring looks interesting, but it is still hormone based so I daren't risk it