I am so very sorry for your loss.
I posted this poem by Jackie Kay, 'Darling' (about the loss of her friend Julia Darling to cancer) on one of OJ's threads. The last lines have helped me through some dark times:
Darling
You might forget the exact sound of her voice
Or how her face looked when sleeping.
You might forget the sound of her quiet weeping
Curled into the shape of a half moon,
When smaller than her self, she seemed already to be leaving
Before she left, when the blossom was on the trees
And the sun was out, and all seemed good in the world.
I held her hand and sang a song from when I was a girl -
Hei Ya Ho Boys, Let her go Boys
And when I stopped singing she had slipped away,
Already a slip of a girl again, skipping off,
Her heart light, her face almost smiling.
And what I didn't know or couldn't see then Was that she hadn't really gone.
The dead don't go till you do, loved ones.
The dead are still here holding our hands.
If anyone lives on after death through the love they share with those who survived them it will surely be your 'brave sweet man'.