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Original poster

Please come and talk to me I (eeny) URGENTLY need some help or support am in a right old state

26 replies

eenybeeny · 22/05/2008 15:29

I am ttc dc2. Been having terrible nightmares (there is a thread about it in bereavement) and today have been very very tired. I have been throwing up MANY times today managed to do it so my DS who is only 21 months doesnt see. Well I was just sick ALL over the entire kitchen floor and he saw and stood there shaking and crying and he is only just now starting to calm down I am trying to explain Mama has a little boo boo but she is OK. I was sooooo ill with his pregnancy I think I am pregnant again - took a test (a week early) and it says not pregnant but I feel I KNOW I am because this is exactly what happened to me last time around. I dont know. I feel so ill and obviously throwing up a lot and am so so so upset my son is upset over it. DH is working late tonight so I am alone with DS til bedtime and I just feel awful and upset and totally emotional. I feel so so so emotional.

OP posts:
Original poster
eenybeeny · 22/05/2008 15:33

sorry bumping I really need someone to give me some perspective

OP posts:
foxythesnowfox · 22/05/2008 15:35

hello. Are you OK now?

Original poster
eenybeeny · 22/05/2008 15:37

hello. yes I guess so. just shaken. there is still STUFF all over the kitchen floor I dont want to open the door because I dont want DS going in so may leave it for DH to clean up when he gets home. I just feel like shit. I wish I knew if I was pregnant or just really ill and needed medical help?? And my poor DS is so upset.

OP posts:
Carmenere · 22/05/2008 15:37

Well Eeney, if you are pregnant (and I hope you are) your ds is going to need to get used to you throwing up and not be alarmed by it so I would say to try to calm down as that is all you can do atm. Pretty much everything else is out of your control. I will warn you that there is a bit of a vomiting bug going around atm, it even had me wondering if I was up the duff. fingers crossed for you x

foxythesnowfox · 22/05/2008 15:37

Just wanted to look in, now gone back and re-read your OP. Are you happy to be PG? I'm guessing you are, so is it just that you feel ill?

Is that the only thing wrong?

Sorry I haven't read your other thread, wanted to get back to you here first.

MrsDougRoss · 22/05/2008 15:37

he will not remember, I used to drop ds in the cot as i went to the toliet to be sick, he was a little younger though. Can you go and get another test so that you will know.

Lizzylou · 22/05/2008 15:37

Oh, Eeny, are you OK?
Can anyone come round and help you out?
Don't worry abot your son, he won't be affected. Stick on a DVD/Cbeebies and rest up on the sofa.
Hope you are OK

LittleMyDancing · 22/05/2008 15:38

My goodness - you poor thing, you sound all of a quiver.

first things first - are you able to sit down and explain to DS that you're not feeling very well, but that you're ok? give him lots of reassurance, has he got any books where someone is ill that you could say 'it's like in that book you've got'?

secondly, it sounds like your hormones are going completely crazy, so you might be right, you might well be pg. is this a good thing? I assume it is, as you say you're ttc. take some deep breaths and have a cup of tea, and have some big hugs

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

is there something that will distract you and DS? Maybe now's the time to stick that DVD on and have a cuddle? don't try and do anything except just get through the time until bedtime as easily as possible.

we're all here for you

EffiePerine · 22/05/2008 15:38

Can you ask a friend to come round and help? Even to watch DS while you clear up?

Sounds like it might be a bug rather than pg, but leave it a week and test again.

LittleMyDancing · 22/05/2008 15:39

you sound like you might be having a bit of a panic attack, they're really nasty and I know how you feel. Lots of deep, slow breaths. Don't do anything except breathe for a bit. It will get better.

Original poster
eenybeeny · 22/05/2008 15:39

yes I am ttc so would be happy. the other stuff that is wrong is I am having a lot of nightmares about my DS dying (my nephew died and its related to that)

Its just that I feel so ill and worried and alone. I dont know. I am probably making a mountain out of a mole hill. I just wish my DH was home.

OP posts:
foxythesnowfox · 22/05/2008 15:40

I've had that vom bug too, but lets look on the positive side. If you have tested a week early you will probably get a negative result, but your body is suggesting otherwise.

Don't worry about DS seeing you being ill. He is fine You need to relax and get yourself together. Have you any lemonade? Poor out a big jug of it and leave it to go flat. Its good if you have got a bug. Sip it at regular intervals.

Clean your teeth, wash your face and brush your hair. A cup of hot sweet tea might help too.

And come and tell us how you are

silverfrog · 22/05/2008 15:41

dd1 used to get upset by me being sick when I was pregnant with dd2 (and I was horribly sick several times a day for 6 months)

In some ways, it is natural for them to be upset - it is something they do not understand, and to see mum in an incapacitated state (which I certainly was) is unsettling.

dd1 got over it though, and as MrsDougRoss said, he will not remembwer in the long run.

I hope you are feeling a little better (and I hope you are pregnant, even if that means your ds will have ot get used to a bit more vomiting on your part)

ksld · 22/05/2008 15:41

So sorry to hear you are feeling so awful. Being sick is horrid and your poor DS is obviously sympathising with you and had a shock. (If it helps my DS used to make sick noises into the loo next to me during my second pregnancy with hyperemesis - was not nice at time but seems funny now). If you are stuck on your own all day now why not get into pyjamas, have a cuddle on the sofa with sick bowl next to you and watch TV/video. See if you can find something to make you laugh - no heartrending adverts etc. If you feel emotional then you have a good cry - yes DS may be upset, but he won't be hurt by it, and you can let it all out and then muster a smile for him and tell him Mummy is feeling sore but is better now.

One other thing to keep hold of - I was sick every day during my second pregnancy/in hospital lots of times/cried loads and loads, and my DS (2.6 when his brother was born) was often distressed, but remembers none of it 1 year on!

Original poster
eenybeeny · 22/05/2008 15:42

ok

breathe

thank you

I dont think there is anyone who can come over to help me. I am going to take DS out for a walk he is getting so restless I havent really done anything with him today. At the moment I dont feel the need to be sick so think I could manage a short walk.

I will post when I get back hopefully in a calmer state of mind. thank you!

OP posts:
cyteen · 22/05/2008 15:42

I second the friend idea, if there's someone who can come and be with you it might help. If not, don't worry about your DS being upset, just take some time for you both to calm down together - lots of deep breaths (for you), lots of reassurances and cuddles (for you both). And I would recommend trying to do as little as possible, just curl up on the sofa with your DS and let your mind go blank

foxythesnowfox · 22/05/2008 15:45

Cbeebies. It is for times like this.

StarSparkle · 22/05/2008 15:45

Poor u ! Try to calm yourself down as panicing will only just make you feel more emotional. Don't beat yourself up about your son seeing you be ill, he is more than likely to see this at some stage. I recently came down with a stomach bug, cramps, sickness ect and my dd walked into the bathroom as i had to rush in there are forgot 2 shut the door. She too was upset so i just told her mummy was sick and she finally excepted this in the end.

Are you feeling really ill ? Maybe you could phone nhs direct - i have done this a few times and they offer you good advice and listen to your worries - they also have a webpage.

I'm on AD's at the moment and have had depression for around 13 yrs so i understand your emotional distress - it can be very scary and makes you feel at your wits end.

Please don't feel bad about feeling the way you are at the moment and worry about upsetting your ds - my dd also was upset about seeing me being sick, but she was ok in the end. Perhaps telling him calmly that mummy was ill but its okay now. I find cuddling up on the sofa and watching dd's fav shows always helps her calm down after she has been upset.

Original poster
eenybeeny · 22/05/2008 16:36

thank you. I just got home from taking DS out for a walk to take his mind off of it as he wouldnt stop crying. I am feeling better emotionally and physically - I do think I am pregnant and just tested too early. This is too much like being pregnant. We will see. I just want today to pass.

OP posts:
foxythesnowfox · 22/05/2008 19:44

how are you doing Eeny?

olivo · 22/05/2008 20:01

HI eeny - sorry to hear you're feeling so bad. hope you have managed to get some rest today.
no real advice but just wanted to say good luck with ttc and drop by the Aug 2006 thread when you get a moment; a few of us are still there!

RambleOn · 22/05/2008 20:09

Hi eeny - hope you're okay.

Fingers crossed for you

megandtyler · 22/05/2008 20:38

hi
hope you are feeling better
try not to put to much pressure on yourself i had horrible nightmares about things happening to dd and i sometimes have horrible daydreams that make me cry.when ds has gone to bed try to tell dh about the nightmares it will help if you open up a bit. a good gry will get the emotion out.
Fingers crossed you are pregnant but if not think of the fun you can have trying!!!

Original poster
eenybeeny · 22/05/2008 21:25

hi! back again. DS was pretty sad all day it wasnt nice. I have had such a shock. I am so scared - scared I AM pregnant and its a reality and also scared I am not and I have to still have the snticipation of when its going to happen. And being as ill as I have been today I remember what it was like it was awful so yes I am scared.

My breasts are tender and I can not lie on my left side without wanting to be sick. Throughout the entire pregnancy with DS I couldnt lie on my left side. Its bizarre. I am going to contact my fertility/obgyn/baby doctor consultant first thing tomorrow morning and see if there is any kind of early scan they can do just to put me out of my misery.

Olivo I will stop in and see you all! Will be nice to catch up!

OP posts:
foxythesnowfox · 23/05/2008 10:13

How are you doing today?

Sounds like you don't enjoy PG much. I remember being far more scared second time around simply because I knew what to expect.

DS1 won't be affected by seeing you be ill. It might be a good time to think about some help. Do you have family close by, or friends or neighbours who can lend a hand? Even if its just to take DS for a walk for 20 mins, it'll just give you enough time to get yourself together.

I'm not sure an early scan will detect much, and would probably be an internal scan as I believe they can detect things earlier.

I suppose if you wanted to put a positive spin in on you could tell yourself that this sickness means that all the hormones are working and that is a positive thing?

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