RIGHT! EVERYONE STOP WHAT YOU ARE DOING AND GIVE---- OJ ---- YOUR THOUGHTS, PRAYERS AND HUGS

[NotABanana]

Update at 20:17 - No more trifles today. Steves breathing not good and he won't take his meds. DN is coming in morning and said about fitting him with a driver.

Update at 20:28 - Got some mates here, not sure if tonight the night

Come on girls!!

Oh OJ , I have been lurking but have only posted once. I feel so and for you. Your MIL has no right to dictate to you in your home. What an absolute BITCH. I agree with others who have said rise above it and conserve your energy, focus on Steve and the children.
Re the back pain, Squiffys suggestion of diazepam is a really good one (I used to nurse patients with back problems and surgical back ops). Voltarol and paracetamol work well if you take them regularly. Codiene works better if you take it with paracetamol iyswim.
Steve didn't eat today.
Praying you have a peaceful night and your MIL vanishes off the face of the earth before Monday. Lots of {{{{{hugs}}}}}
xxxxx

Sending love and support. Just try to concentrate on Steve, yourself and the children - try to block MIL's ridiculous posturing from your mind.

She should use some energy trying to help, rather than all this poisonous venting. When did she last: offer to do some shopping or washing/cook you a meal/have a pleasant emotion??? Grrr

Beautifully written letter Buda Shame you needed to write it at all

OJ, sending ((((((((hugs))))))))). I can't believe the gall of MIL, really I can't. I wonder if, deep down, she knows you are doing the best for Steve, but she's so eaten up with jealousy that you have a great relationship with him and she doesn't, that she's hell-bent on trying to force him to love her more than you! I'm sure she will be moaning to all and sundry that she's hard done by, therefore making herself the centre of attention with a "poor me" attitude. What a waste of space she is.

Cracking letter Buda.

If you use it OJ, you might like to add that hearing is one of the last senses to go, and that he does not need to hear them being upset kicking off as he has no right of reply.

Use this if you have to .

Your eyesight goes as soon as you lose the strength to keep your eyelids open. Your sense of touch diminishes as your blood pressure drops and blood is reserved for the brain and heart. Your sense of smell and taste probably stay, but what use are they for communicating? Since your ears are close to your brain, they will have a decent blood supply as long as your brain has blood. And it takes no physical strength to operate the ears. If you have ever fainted, you know this first-hand; the last things and first things you will remember before and after fainting will most likely be sounds,

That's a great letter Buda.

xxxx to OJ

I feel so sad reading that, about sound being the last thing, my darling darling Matthew collapsed and died within seconds in my garden , our cat Midgie was there, I have often wondered if she cried around him

Bree - that is so sad but is something I have often heard.

triplets - no words I am afraid. I too have a Matthew and my heart breaks for you at the loss of your precious Matthew.

Triplets

I am sorry, I did not mean to upset anyone, but I felt it may have been useful if OJ chose to write.

It may be different with sudden death.

I am so sorry, if I upset you.

Bree, that is very near to my experience with my dear dad

Triplets, I have no words to express my sorrow for you

Thank you Buda, I have sneaked a look at your lovely boy, you live a long way away!

Oh I am sorry, you haven`t upset me, but I often think about that morning, what happened, how he felt, it torments me to this day. Its just me feeling low because of DH

thinking of you OJ.

Without wishing to diminish what happened to Matthew, I should think he had no real awarness. I think the text refers to a prolonged death.

much love

LGJ

XXX

Christ - it is all horrible isn't it?

OJ should not be going through what she is.

Triplets should not have lost her beautiful boy and now be dealing with the stress of her DH's illness.

I really really do sometimes wonder if there is a God.

Well......I have to believe there is, I have to believe that something good comes out of something so bad. If Matthew hadn`t died that morning he would never have had two brothers and a sister. When we got married many moons ago I sooooooooo wanted a daughter, I am one of 5, 4 brothers! Then I had a threatened miscarriage with Matthew, but all was well, then we tried for 12 years for another baby, it just never happened. Then in 94 he died, I had 2 ivf cycles in 96, hot no-where, then had 1 cycle with donated eggs, and the rest is history! Tom Tom is the image of Matthew.

The world works in mysterious ways triplets. And YOUR triplets are gorgeous.

Well I think that too, I am sooooooooooo lucky. They are hard work though, it was much easier when they were babies!

I'm sure!

Thank God for IVF. My Matthew is an IVF boy. Hard to belive when you look at them running about isn't it?

I like to think there is a God - very sad for your loss triplets.
OJ's story makes me thin k of my younger brother who was nursed at home through his last months - I'm so glad he was there and not in hospital - it was scary and strange for me at 13 but my wonderful parents did all they could to make his and our lives 'normal' in that short time. I feel he is up there somewhere keeping an eye on us all.

I'm sure there IS a God. I just get so pissed off with him at times.

Am def off to bed now. Night all.

And night night especially to OJ and Steve - hope you have a peaceful night and tomorrow is a trifle day.

So sorry to read that MM, it must be sooooooo hard to have watch someone you love so much die, esp your child, at least we were spared that. You too have had your share of sadness, life and death go hand in hand, it affects us all. I have to believe that Matthew is up there with my Dad and Harry`s parents, and Midgie xx

am sure he is triplets

OJ - I am back from holiday and have tried my best to catch up, once again all I can say is how truly amazing you are

PLEASE enjoy the waking moments and do not let anyone (MIL or otherwise) ruin these moments. x x