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Original poster

Spincter injury, fistula - support eachother?

958 replies

Cyee · 13/05/2008 20:22

Hi everyone,

Wonderful weather we're having

I am propped up in bed post-hospital and I was wondering if anyone out there knows of, or would enjoy/benefit from, a thread or support site for people who have experienced the above (sphincter damage, fistula etc.) as a result of childbirth.

In my own experience, this whole area is a bit taboo. In fact the consultants reckon there are many women who have some symptoms related to the above, who never seek treatment. The thought of women embarrassed to discuss these matters is awful, yet that seems to be the case.

So - this (while souped up on painkillers) is a call to arms:

  • Is there a site out there for women like us?
  • If not, would you like there to be?
  • Would a thread on MN especially for this, be useful?
  • Would it be useful to share experiences with consultants/physios/hospitals/procedures?

If these matters resonate with you or anyone you know, it would be great if you could point them in this direction. I'm going to post in the 'health' and 'childbirth' sections too.

I know too well the taboo around this. I posted on MN when I got my diagnosis and used a different name...

Hope to hear from some people soon.

Cyee
(successfully repaired as of last Wednesday (fingers/legs crossed))

OP posts:
4jen · 08/01/2009 19:46

I'm TTC so will let you know how I get on. There are no isssues that I'm aware of apart from the obvious have a C/S!.

Original poster
Cyee · 13/01/2009 19:42

Thanks 4Jen and good luck with yours.

OP posts:
ThingOne · 13/01/2009 20:28

Finally got round to ringing my nurse to see when my op might be scheduled. No reply yet but at least I have now started the process. Eeek! Just how painful is it going to be? .

Original poster
Cyee · 14/01/2009 14:06

ThingOne - well done on starting the process! It's the worst part. Is this for a recon jobby? After my op I was v tender for a good few days but then it was mainly my insides that took a while to adjust. Over those first few weeks I was only on paracetamol and ibruprofen and occasionally Tramadol. While everyone is different I hope that gives an indication of what it was like for me anyway.

Take care of yoruself!

OP posts:
ThingOne · 14/01/2009 14:22

Yes, it's reconstruction. The posterior wall of my vagina seems to have healed onto my coccyx, instead of general gunk filling the place where my rectum was. Bleurgh.

Original poster
Cyee · 14/01/2009 22:19

Yikes! Let us know when you hear more from the nurse.

OP posts:
Original poster
Cyee · 18/01/2009 20:01

Bump - hi everyone. Hope all's well

OP posts:
Jacksmama · 20/01/2009 22:19

All is quiet on the western (Canadian) front... just waiting for OP on Feb 9.
[slightly scared quivering emoticon]

Original poster
Cyee · 20/01/2009 22:57

Aw Jacksmama, good luck with it.... let us know how you ge on.... Bless your quivering emoticon...

OP posts:
Jacksmama · 20/01/2009 23:00

I'm sure I'll be posting for some hand-holding before then...

How are you???

ThingOne · 21/01/2009 09:41

You can have a sneaky hand now, if you like.

I got a message from my nurses yesterday - so glad when they actually leave real messages rather than asking you to call back and you play telephone tag for days - and they're going to talk to the surgeon on Friday but there's a long wait for surgery at. Not quite sure what "long" means but no doubt I'll hear soon. At the moment I think I can handle waiting as long as I know vaguely when it's likely. But of course I'm no longer urgent so I imagine I'll be the first person pushed off the list if things get tight. Hey, ho.

Jacksmama · 21/01/2009 16:49

No need to be sneaky, I'll take all the hands I can get!!
I hope you get in soon, too.
xxx

Original poster
Cyee · 22/01/2009 20:08

Hey ladies,

Jacksmama sorry I missed your reply post on Tuesday! I'm doing well thanks. Been away at a conference for a couple of days so about to tuck in to a chinese chicken curry... so wrong but oh so right and then early to bed. How are your nerves today?

ThingOne keep us posted on dates. Yes, it's much better when they leave a proper message isn't it!

Take care all

OP posts:
Original poster
Cyee · 03/02/2009 19:43

Bump - hi ladies.

Jacksmama - how are you? how are the nerves?

ThingOne, any news for you in terms of dates?

OP posts:
Jacksmama · 03/02/2009 23:47

Hi - my nerves are currently buried in Kleenex; we've all had flu and I've been more worried about Jackbaby's temp and my own aching bones than the surgery Monday. Ask me again on Friday!
How are the rest of you?

ThingOne · 04/02/2009 13:31

Good luck next week, Jacksmama.

I spoke to my specialist nurse a few weeks ago and explained what I was expecting. I now have an appointment with my surgeon in about a month.

Original poster
Cyee · 04/02/2009 15:29

Hey there,

Get well soon Jacksmama&co.

Thanks for the update ThingOne, hope all your treatment is going ok. My fil starts his chemo next week - hope he has the same spirit as you about it all.

I am doing fine at the moment, other than the above, which has of course been worrying for us all. Physically all is good with me and my sphincter(s)

Take care all.

OP posts:
flourybaps · 05/02/2009 21:51

Hi cyee and all on this thread. Erm, well im not sure if I belong on here really, I know a lot of you have had it worse than me but I have got back from my pre-op today and just feel stressed and nervous about my op, starteda thread about it but thought maybe this one would be a good place to come for some support.

Im due to have vaginal repair (botched episiotomy and tearing) and reapir of rectocele at the end of the month.

My dd is 8 months old now and Im just nervous about the op, general anasthetic, the recovery, pain, lifting dd....... evertything really.

(I came on this thread back in november or december as notnewbutshy)

Been told I have to have 3 months off work sick, which sounds lovely in theory but Im just so worried about the recovery, if its anything like after birth I dont think I could stand that again, Im not usually such a wimp and I know there are people on here with much more to contend with than me, Im just having a little pity party for myself tonight

Jacksmama · 05/02/2009 23:34

Can I join your party? That's what I'm having on Monday, an OP to repair the damage done by a horrible tear and episiotomy when they dragged DS out with forceps. I have a slight rectocele but they're leaving it alone because I'm not done breastfeeding. But a polyp has formed in the scar in my vagina and it hurts all the time so they're fixing that now. I was told to take 2 weeks off. Will let you know how it goes. But my surgeon also told me the recovery would be NOTHING like it was after I had Jackbaby (it was so awful) because the repair will be done under controlled circumstances and not like trying to sew up a massive tear in swollen tissue.
xxx

flourybaps · 06/02/2009 08:24

Hi Jacksmama I know exactly what you mean about forceps delivery, I think 'dragged out' is the only way to describe it really

Hope all goes well for your op on monday and sounds like the recovery might not be too bad couldnt be any worse than post childbirth im thinking!.

Was lay in bed last night thinking about it all, by the time I go back to work after the op my dd will be a year old, what a year! Im trying to think positive and concentrate on the fact that I may be all sorted by then and maybe even having sex again ........ and people keep asking me when we are having our next

Jacksmama · 06/02/2009 17:49

Errrr, yes, I'm right there with you... I can't even contemplate a second yet even though I have been promised a section if we do have another. In fact, the surgeon told me she would insist on me having a section if I wanted another babe "as she wasn't going to have the repair messed up again", LOL.
I'm a bit about the timing of the OP - it's on Monday and Jackbaby's birthday is on the Friday. I'm unnerved enough being around hospitals, and especially one year after his (really terribly traumatic) birth... sigh. I have a lovely therapist who wasn't too pleased with the timing as she says that our brains see anniversaries of anything as a rather big deal, good or bad, and she says dealing with an OP is hard enough without stirring up the PTSD again... but what are you gonna do, I'm not going to delay it any longer. I'd like to have some sort of a sex life again (and so would DH, I'm sure - he's been so patient and supportive, the lovely man, but I know he feels a bit deprived), and I'd like to feel better too!
Will let you know how it goes.

imnotalone · 07/02/2009 13:09

Hi Everyone.

Good luck for Monday Jacksmama. I really hope it all goes well for you.

Post op recovery really isn't bad flourybaps. I've had 2 repairs now and whilst it was pretty uncomfortable for a couple weeks it soon went back to normal. I'm a bit suprised they've suggested having 3 months off. I would see how you feel - if your ready to go back sooner then you should if they o.k and you haven't got a physical job.

Unfortunately, the first op failed but I'm due to see the consultant on Thursday to see if the colostomy managed to save any of the second repair.

As for a sex life - what's that?!!

flourybaps · 07/02/2009 15:01

Thanks imnotalone, good to know recovery not too bad. Sounds like you have had a rough time of it, hope the news is good on thursday.

Was bit upset yesterday, spoke to colo-rectal surgeon who wants to see her before I have my op, she has reviewed my proctogram results and thinks I have got peoblem with a crappy pelvic floor, she said it was quite complicated so Im not really sure whats wrong but she said I may have to go for biofeddback therapy post op......... anyone had this? Its never straight forward is it?

imnotalone · 07/02/2009 18:31

I'm pretty sure although I could be wrong that biofeedback is very simple. Basically, you have a small probe type thing which is connected to a computer to monitor how well you do your pelvic floor exercises. It's nothing to worry about - it just shows if you are doing it properly and how to improve.

Original poster
Cyee · 08/02/2009 20:30

Hi all,
I keep missing out on these chats!
Jacksmama - good luck tomorrow! Will take time out to think of you.

Hey Flourybaps - welcome back! Hope the op goes ok. I agree with imnotalone on biofeedback. I had it befor my op and is exactly as imnotalone describes. I actually got quite competitive doing it and wanted to test myself...it's the small things!! The screen is like a bit of gym equipment, there are loads of different programmes... long slow build, quick pulses etc etc. It helps identify whether your exercises are working properly, which is why I liked it. I could see if I was making progress.

In terms of the recovery, I know the ops we've all had are a bit different, but for what it's worth I was back at work after 4 weeks although I had quite a few good days within that timeframe too. I definitely echo that recovery is different and better than the birth because of the lack of hormones, newborn and general drama. Hope it's the same for you.

Take care all

OP posts: