@drivinmecrazy bless you, it’s a real roller coaster emotionally isn’t it? It is nerve wracking when you are waiting for results and treatment plans, and you’ve had the extra snake taking you back a few steps. I do think it’s a bit like a game of snakes and ladders, all the way through tbh.
On a positive note, the set back means that your treatment plan will be the right one for you. If it changes, it will be to treat exactly what is happening inside and that will be much more reassuring in the long run. I know that you know this, but it’s really important to hang onto that right now.
Your family sound lovely, very supportive. I think you need to start putting yourself first and accept that this will affect them but that they want to help and support you. There are only so many ways they can do that and they can only do it if you let them. It’s difficult to get the balance between practical and mental support, and there is a certain amount of upset/rage etc that you will go through alone anyhow. But they are there for you, as you would be for them! I suspect your DH is feeling confused about whether you want him to be with you an appointments, it sounds like his default is that he expects to go with you. I’m sure he doesn’t mean to make your feel hurt, but I’m sorry you are feeling that way.
Cancer is crap, it’s a horrible disease that none of us want or deserve. Treatment can be long relatively, and complex. I remember being in denial for a long time, even whilst undergoing chemo. But you will feel a bit better once you know your plan and once you get going.
I remember saying to my DH, on the way to an early appointment, that I didn’t like thinking “I have cancer”, I would feel better when I could think “I’m being treated for cancer” and even better when I could think “I had cancer”.
Best of luck today xx