The Great Cancer Recovery part 3

[TopOfTheCliff]

You may have finished active treatment for cancer, be in remission or NED. You want to look forward not dwell on the past. You know you ought to be eating well, exercising more and picking up the threads of your old life. Join us and share the ups and downs of recovery. We understand!

Here are some resources we found helpful:

The Mountain Lion
https://www.cancerpal.co.uk/post/what-it-s-really-like-to-receive-a-cancer-diagnosis

Peter Harvey on Psychology of recovery:
https://workingwithcancer.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/After-the-treatment-finishes-then-what.pdf

Resources from Penny Brohn:
https://pennybrohn.org.uk/our-approach/resources/

Breast Cancer Now Moving Forward:
https://breastcancernow.org/information-support/support-you/moving-forward

Get your Oomph Back with Carolyn Garritt
http://www.oomph.london/home.html

Charity providing treats for cancer patients:
https://somethingtolookforwardto.org.uk/

Exercise is good for you:
https://www.webmd.com/cancer/features/exercise-cancer-patients

Any more suggestions? Post them below

There is also a thread for those suspected to have cancer, or newly diagnosed and facing treatment, and also a thread for those with Stage IV cancer who want to talk to others in the same boat.

Cats

This sounds broadly similar to my experience. I finished treatment in December last year. Niggling discomfort post surgery and radiotherapy persists. Not too debilitating, more an unwelcome reminder. Assured by BCN nothing untoward, or unexpected. Recently quite sharp pain in underarm area like you. More strenuous exercise, heavier weights, more active generally. Again BCN says not to worry, and mostly I don’t. I also wonder if it may be referred pain from PICC line.

However, maybe you should have it checked out, rather than take a random from the internet’s word.

It seems recovery takes a while and is not linear. The treatment, whilst hopefully effective, is quite an assault on our bodies.

Thanks Sierra. Hope you enjoy the yoga.

Thanks Sandwich and Top. Will send you a message Top as have to do via PM. Going a bit stir crazy with all activities banned for 6 weeks but apparently risk of wound reopening or getting infected. Restarted Tamoxifen. Have further appointment on Tues then another 2 weeks after which hopefully the last one. It's all looking perfect at the moment but feel well enough to be swimming or leaping around and can't. Can't even clean. My 2 favourite TV shows just ended. And weather is very rainy. Might be a gap in the rain on Saturday. No swimming until 12 weeks though I did negotiate a probable 10.

Cats I don't have that pain though had a lot of numbness there. I think its almost certain it's nothing but would see if they will scan.

I have armpit pain too, which is worse after I exercise. So I think it’s very common but perhaps good to get it checked. I was advised no heat packs because of the lymphoedema risk but also got given a leaflet in which they were recommended so who knows…And I got lymphoedema anyway in spite of being super cautious.

I had a 6 month post surgery check up yesterday for my lymphoedema surgery. Unfortunately my swelling is getting worse not better but the surgeon says it’s too soon to be sure it hasn’t worked. Nevertheless I am having a bit of a self-pitying phase and feeling a bit low. Onwards. Sending strength to everyone

@SierraSapphire I went out for dinner with friends last night and one of them is evangelical about HRT being the solution for everything. She was giving a hard time to the two of us who aren’t taking it (because we don’t have menopause symptoms). I thought about the Louise Newsom investigation but didn’t want to have an argument so just left it.

All the best for your DD’s new adventures at Oxford @Penguinsa. Such an exciting time.

DD got another early offer to do a double degree in law and communications which she is seriously considering. But it’s in Sydney so she would be living at home. We have a smallish house and when she comes home in the early hours, wakes me up and I’m then up for an hour or more. I’m seriously considering turning into a nagging mum leaving her lists of jobs to do every day so moving to Canberra will be more appealing haha.

You're going through a lot @dotty2, it's not surprising you feel like that. Can you take some time for yourself to do something nice?

I spent the afternoon at DM's house and got a couple of estate agent valuations the second of which looks much more like what we were hoping for. It's possible that maybe unrealistic but the house is very near the town centre but tucked into a quiet corner, so he said it was quite difficult to value because it was unusual, so it just takes the right person to come along. Looks like we'll do a soft market so that it doesn't go onto Rightmove but they do talk to people they've got on their database and they're seeing about other houses to just test it out with the idea of going on officially in January when the market picks up (or there is more chance of the market picking up given the lots of other stuff going on at the moment which is affecting selling!)

I also went to quite a difficult yoga class early in the morning and then managed to rather pathetic 20 minutes on the cross trainer! It was good to get my exercise out of the way in the morning though, which I've done less of since starting my job.

@TopOfTheCliff thanks for asking. My back has been up and down. Some days it seems better and I think I am being over drammatic. Other days it is worse and I am convinced I am doomed. Swinging between those two extremes.
@Catswithhats I have not had armpit pain but quite a few other random episodes of shooting pain around the areas of my surgeries which I am ignoring if they remain occasional.
@dotty2 sorry about the lymphoedema setback. Fully understand feeling low about that. It is hard, after going through the gamble and expense of LVA surgery not to have high hopes and expectations tied to it, with corresponding dissapointment when it does not deliver the hoped for silver bullet. Sounds like things may yet improve. Fingers crossed.

Oh @dotty2 I missed your post. Sorry to hear you are struggling. It is so disheartening to have to live with the aftermath of treatment which has apparently saved our lives but wrecked them. I hope you can find a routine that brings down the swelling.
I am a bit disconcerted by my larger right side. I can’t believe that I always had a bigger arm and leg before all this nonsense. My broken ankle and new hip are on the right, as is the total axillary clearance. Now the limbs both look bigger but with muscle not swelling. I shall have to go back through photos albums for evidence! Maybe I have always been lopsided 🙄.
Second visit to the dentist resulted in a thorough repair free of charge by a senior partner. They were very kind. I celebrated with a trip to the recycling centre which gladdens my heart. I’m clearing out the world of pallets DH has been collecting in the back garden, as well as redecorating my little sitting room. I want to order a sofa but will make myself wait until the floor and painting is done. It’s nice to be busy and useful.

Hello everyone..I'm back.
I just wanted to say hello. This recovery lark is hard work. Day by day. Trying to swim, doing some adapted circuit training with physio to help with fatigue and strength. I'm just bloody knackered all the time. DS gender dysmorphic , lots of stuff life just throws at one , stuff and more stuff but will keep plodding on but realise there are reasons other than cancer and all the treatment and side effects from treatment for being tired!!

I'm going into the winter feeling exhausted. I had a cold that really laid me low - I'd forgotten how bad a bad cold can be and how long it takes to recover. That was followed straight away by cholangitis, which I get now and again as a result of my cancer surgery. @nappybrained I understand that knackered feeling. We deal with all the post cancer stuff which takes up a lot of physical and mental energy but then there's the extra layer of everyday life stuff on top.

I was watching a TV programme where someone was walking along a beach - not a tropic beach - just a nice quiet British beach with the sound of waves and gulls. Its made me long for a couple of days of that - peace, quiet and solitude.

Morning all this thread is a real comfort to me. I like following everyone's adventures in recovery.

I'm here to ask for a bit of help in re-inhabiting my body. I'm struggling to restart any intimacy with my partner after all the treatment. A lot of the time any kind of touch on the breasts or near any of the surgery sites makes me cry or feel quite sick. For a lot of the treatment I coped by mentally leaving my body and going elsewhere in my head, it feels like I'm having trouble getting back in.

I probably need to have some kind of therapy but I can't quite face it yet. It feels helpful just to get this out on screen, but any thoughts on it welcome!

Sorry the lymphoedema operation has not helped so far Dotty I hope you can fit in something nice for yourself, you've had so much to deal with lately.

Thanks Remaker and congratulations on your DDs offer. When do universities start over there, is it Sept / Oct like here?

Glad you got to yoga Sierra

Good you got dentist sorted Top

Sorry you are tired Nappy and MissMarples and sorry you are struggling with your body after cancer Hellon. I think the body issues happen quite a lot and relationships also seem common to be challenged, it's a lot for everyone to adjust to. Therapy might help though sometimes I struggled with the fact my body went from looking nice pre cancer treatment to like I had been run over by a bus and all the fake it's still beautiful when I had one breast chopped off, scars, had gone overweight for first time, neck had gone saggy, face got puffed up with steroids, hair largely went with chemo, there was nothing attractive about it and it was one more thing taken. 2.5 years on I am now similar in appearance largely to pre cancer, not exactly the same but close enough I feel fine again but inbetween I really struggled. The only things that helped me where no photos, no mirrors, working on things like getting weight back, exercising, covering things I didn't like though may not be the best way to deal with it but was my way of muddling through it.

I am 2.5 weeks post DIEP and quite tired and bored with restrictions but feeling everywhere, healing well, look so much better, only binder and a few bandages left and even the numbness under arm from previous surgery has improved. Really want to be back in a pool but they are very strict there, have said 12 weeks though with other surgeons some people have been told 6. But I can't afford to risk anything but would love to be back in a pool especially as weather is going.

That’s great progress @Penguinsa . You want recovery to be uneventful and dull. May it pass quickly!
My friend had a hip replacement on Friday and compared to my quiet recovery hers has been wild. Vomiting and urinary retention and low BP for starters. I was lucky!
@HellonHeels I feel for you. I hated the sack of potatoes I saw in the mirror after treatment ended. Would it help to treat yourself to some gentle things like a scented bath, skin massage with nice oils, maybe the Look Good Feel Good session? I found it all helped me like myself a bit more. Getting fitter and losing weight is helping, and having my hair back (again). It’s not an overnight fix but unless you show yourself some love you won’t feel loveable.
Off for a walk in the drizzle with my granddog. Squirrels!!

@HellonHeels It took me ages to get used to my body post op, in fact I'm still not sure I am used to it. It took me weeks before I could get used to touching my operation site and I still don't like anyone seeing me undressed including DH. My abdomen looks like a road map and the area is numb from where nerves were cut.

Thanks Top. Thought we would have a walk at Sandringham free on our Historic Houses cards but DH 20 mins in got a puncture and also had lost wheel key. So had to call his recovery firm which was fine, walked round our garden and there were our silkies, Robins, pigeons, flowers and berries on trees and had sandwiches and tea out there then roast for dinner. Saw DS had a long floral bath whilst we were out and has set himself up with DDs pale blue silk pillowcase and my Robin and blossom pale blue bedspread! But no working car and supposed to be taking DD to Oxford tomorrow including luggage of which she has masses and have hospital check on Tuesday. So will be busy trying to sort that tomorrow morning. May need to hire a car. Train is 4 hours 20 but she has so much stuff and wants a car. All fine with recovery so suspect hospital could be put back for me. She us so excited, discovered an extra person and they all row, she us only state school one but she's fine with that.

That’s annoying about the car @Penguinsa I would hire one I think.
Two of my state school DC went to Oxford and had a wonderful time. Both rowed for their colleges and “won their blades” whatever that means! I’m sure DD will fit in just fine.
I’ve just been reading Cathy Hollingsworth “Getting it off my chest” 22 poems about Breast Cancer. It’s wonderful! £1.99 on Kindle for BC charity and I laughed and cried. She is funny, wise and brutal! Recommended!
All well here, cycled up some steep hills (and cried on one) but I am improving slowly.

Good luck for today @Penguinsa, I hope you manage to get something sorted car wise. What an exciting new adventure for your DD.

I also have the random shooting pain from time to time in my chest and under my arm. I'm told it is post surgical pain and is to be expected, though I do find it a bit disconcerting at times.

I've just had phesgo number 17 so am slowly getting towards the end of treatment. I also bought a home eyebrow tint kit for my few remaining eyebrow hairs and I think that has helped a little bit.

Well done on the hills Top!

Thanks Top and Demi. Glad your two loved Oxford Top

Car got fixed at 1pm today so on their way now and her first dinner is 5pm tonight.

Hooray @Penguinsa and good luck to DD. Hope the hospital check went okay.

More hills today and I’m getting a bit stronger. Less suffering and slightly quicker compared to my friends now.
I’m off to the New Forest this weekend to ride in a 100km event. First one in two years, so I am excited to be back in the saddle. DH surprised me today with a lovely new bike. It is very pretty, pale lichen green and a sexy Temple Adventure Disc. I really don’t need another bike but what a treat! I just need to keep on course losing weight to earn it.

Thanks Top DH just sent me a picture of DD and all her stuff in her room at Oxford, that's a relief and it's an hour before the formal dinner at 5pm so works fine.

Lovely to have been given a bike.

My eating hasn't been the best today, 1 Portuguese tart, 1 beef sandwich, 1 pack of jammy dodgers though have just been drinking lime juice with sparkling water and tea but DD is there. Hospital is tomorrow but sure it's fine. Though did a bit of defluffing carpet as bored and could feel internal stitches so stopped, oops.

So glad to hear you were able to get car sorted for dd, @Penguinsa a new adventure for her. Hope all goes well tomorrow.
just back from a glorious weekend away with dd- furthest I’ve driven in years. Glorious weather and a brilliant time.

Thanks Sandwich Glad you had a glorious time with your DD.

Hospital check yesterday went fine just rebandaged and nurse was amazed how fast I am healing. Another 2 appointments to go.

DD enjoying Oxford. DH has got a new tyre. Hoping weather stays OK to go out this Sunday, Saturday is cleaners who have not been for a couple of months. As I am banned from cleaning there's lots of left over boxes etc from DD and lots of fluff from Floof but we have another 2 days to sort. Got bit sorted today.

That’s really good news @Penguinsa and you are doing well at holding back from doing too much. That is why you are healing so well!

I am having a good week of short bursts of intense exercise, as advised by my trainer, and general progress in house and garden sorting. My fitness is creeping back, and I am cycling up some steeper hills now. Tonight I joined the cycle club pub run, and climbed 330m in 7km which is insanely hilly. I am off to the New Forest this weekend to ride in a 100km event which is a lovely autumn ride. I shall be really happy if I complete that event!
I got called to walk DDs dog at lunchtime so I combined that with a raid on IKEA for plant pots and repotted lots of house plants. It’s been a long time since I was fit enough and had enough time at home to sort stuff out and the results are very satisfying. Onward!
Hope you are all making progress, however slowly and tentatively, in the right direction.

Congrats on the healing @Penguinsa and for holding back on the housework. Our academic year is the calendar year so DD will start Uni end of February after a long summer break. Her exams start next week and finish 4th November.

I’ve just had my 6-mthly CT scan with contrast and now sitting in pathology waiting for a blood test. This afternoon I’m taking DD shopping for a dress for her Yr 12 formal. That might be more painful than having needles stuck in both arms haha.

DH went to Korea for work and brought a cold home so he’s been spluttering all over the house and asking weakly if I thought he needed the doctor. Thank goodness he’s gone to the office today, kids are both on school holidays and the house feels too crowded!