Cancer Support Thread 93 - The Thread for the Dread and the Not Yet Dead? Everything you need to know about Cancer but didn’t want to know

[LemonDrizzle10]

Shiny new thread.

I honestly don’t know what I’d do without you lot, you keep me going!

@herecomesthechoochootrain - that is such an odd coincidence. My commiserations on sharing our crappy luck. One 'good' thing (in a context where there aren't any good things, or silver linings or any of that shit) about both being ill is that I guess it's kind of rebalanced things a bit for us as a couple. When DH was first diagnosed I think I went into carer mode a bit and went too far in trying to prioritise all his needs around exercise/rest/stress avoidance etc. I really felt I had to be the strong one. Obviously when I got cancer, we had to re-set all of that, and we are much better now at looking after each other, but in a more mutual way. We are also (now I'm through the other side of active treatment) trying to really seize the day and live the best life we can, while we can. I hate thinking about the more distant future though and just keep anything past the next year or two in a box in my head. I was doing some pension stuff at the weekend and found it almost unbearably stressful for all the associated anxieties/hopes/fears it triggered. I hope you have a treatment plan soon, and am sending you all good wishes.

@LemonDrizzle10 - sorry to hear that, and how great that @isaxx has recent experience. Just goes to show how brilliant this thread is.

I feel exactly the same! My DH had DBS recently and it's working so well. I was definitely in carer mode before my own diagnosis too. Now I'm leaning on him more for support and hopefully we will be where you are at the end of treatment and can live life to the fullest. That's my hope anyway 😊

Perspective has well and truly shifted on what's important which will help me to cope as his Parkinson's progresses xx

Hello @herecomesthechoochootrain ! I could have written your post. Also 40, just diagnosed with grade 3 cancer having found a lump in my boob. Scan showed 4 lymph nodes were abnormal and they tested one and found cancer cells. I also have a CT scan this week, then breast MRI and full body MRI next week.
Best of luck with your scans and hopefully we won't have to wait too much longer to get our treatment plans. Everyone says the waiting is the worst bit....!

Hi all just found this thread. My husband has been diagnosed with cancer. We're told it's at the bottom of his oesophagus and top of his stomach. He's had a ct scan, camera (gastroscopy), pet scan. He had another 2 problems investigated but they were given the all clear. He's having another camera next week (one with an ultra sound on the end) to see how deep into the tissue is it. We haven't seen a doctor. A specialist nurse told him. He's been in hospital for an iron infusion which has made a huge difference to him. We know it hasn't spread anywhere else. They told us it's been there a couple of months. I feel this long wait for treatment isn't right. We've been told it's stage T4A as this cancer has 5 stages. We're hoping we'll be seeing someone a week after this camera to talk about what treatment he'll have. It has been mentioned he'll have chemo surgery chemo and we need to see a surgeon as well. I'm not sure if that will be before treatment. Sorry I'm waffling now and don't know if this is even makes sense anymore xx

@ProperPickle hi!!

Wow so very similar journeys then. I'm torn between feeling desperate to find out what I'm facing, but also terrified what they might find at the same time! I found a lump about 5 weeks ago and I had my biopsy 3 weeks ago and it was classed as aggressive - I'm sat here thinking this stuff is growing inside me and I just want rid of it with every day that passes. Absolutely torture - I have never felt so helpless.

But I am having times when I think whatever it is I'll face it and be here for as long as I can even if they can't cure me. Music seems to help and I've made a play list for the car that lifts me up on the way to work each day.

I'm so tired though - not because of the cancer but I'm not sleeping well at all. The nights are the worst when my mind just runs wild.

Oh, and every ache and pain in my body I now see as a sign it's spread 🥴 I'm imagining new pains and bumps bloody everywhere!!

I'll keep everything crossed that it's a positive CT scan for us both - keep in touch 🫶

herecomesthechoochootrain · Today
its horrible isn’t it? Every single twinge in the body and my minds working overload. I’m looking at my scar from my colon operation and looking at the bumps thinking it’s back. Or a twinge in the liver area thinking it’s there too.
I have also have a mass in my chest area which is on the watch and wait approach and having panic attacks, I’m going to ask on my next appointment in may, I want it out.
I thought I could cope with watch and wait, but obviously not.

@herecomesthechoochootrain
@ProperPickle

I gave grade three triple negative breast cancer. Do either of you know what type of breast cancer you have ?

@catherinewales sorry to hear about your DH. It’s a lot to take in and you must both be in shock.
This thread is for people who might have/ do have or used to have cancer. The thread for families is here:
https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/life_limiting_illness/4729740-the-storm-part-3
You will find people in your situation there. Good luck and stay strong for him xx

Anyone awake?
Can't sleep.
Drowned in menopause sweat ( again!) Feeling rather nauseous.

Mind is wandering... maybe it's time for some sleep inducing medication. I have amitriptyline, but need to check it's okay to take with ribociclib.

DS is 16 today. His request is a ton of cash and a Nando's. I can fulfil at least one of his requests at least!

Trying not move; sickness is a ridiculous fear of mine.

And breathe!

Hey @Enigma52 . I’m here, have been awake since 2. Need to get up soon to get to my radiotherapy.

Happy 16th to your son! Are you going to Nando’s too?

@Yorkshiregold hello!!
Hope your RT goes okay. Do you have to travel far?

DP and I go to Nando's. We eat and bring DS back his favourite Nando's takeaway. DS will then eat and disappear with friends!

@Enigma52

How many 1p pieces would you need to weigh a ton...? 😁

Am pretty sure you can't take amitriptyline on ribo... amitriptyline interacts with quite a lot but I think ribo disturbs sleep anyway

@Enigma52 It’s about an hour away, can take longer depending on traffic. I’m into my last week now though so I can see some light at the end of the tunnel.
Enjoy your Nando’s.

Hey @Tilllly, how are you doing?

👋🏻 @Yorkshiregold
Broken rib from spiteful tumour hurts and wakes me so am tired
But plodding on

You?

@Tilllly you are right. There aren't many drugs ribociclib is prepared to be friends with. Sigh 😞!!

Damm that spiteful tumour. I do hope you can get some rest.

10 years ago, we would have been awake at silly o clock, due to DS's birthday excitement 😊 My how times have changed.

@Yorkshiregold here's hoping for a smooth journey and well done for reaching that close finishing line.

Happy 16th birthday to your ds @Enigma52 🥳

Nothing new to report here. Off for bloods later...will come home via the pub for a 🍷in the sunshine (hopefully it's still out then!).

I'm waiting for confirmation as those results weren't available when I saw them two weeks ago. I was just told it's grade 3 with 4 nodes at least xx

@tothelefttotheleft sorry to hear you have breast cancer too. Have you started treatment yet? Sorry I am just catching up on this thread so not sure where everyone is in the process!
My biopsy showed I am ER+ but haven't received the HER2 results yet.

@herecomesthechoochootrain when is your CT scan? Mine is tomorrow. I'm just desperate to start treatment because as you say I'm viewing every little ache and pain as a sign that it's spreading. Still can't believe this is happening to be honest, it's so so shit. Do you have any DC? I have two - 8 and 4. Haven't told them anything yet but I will soon.

@ProperPickle mine is tomorrow too! I have to fast and drink plenty of water before hand.

Yes two DCs aged 10 and 12 and I sort of blurted it out in the car in the way home from school last week. It felt like the right moment as I had their attention but I didn't want it to feel like it was a big worry and sit them both down etc. so chatting in the car seemed to work as they've both been brilliant (now back to giving me attitude so the cancer sympathy lasted about 2 days 🤣).

I felt a big weight had been lifted once they knew - I've got my little team behind me now and feel much stronger with them.

I also told a couple of friends at that point too who just keep checking in which is perfect. One even bought me a bottle of champagne and said we'd drink it in the garden when I'm better ❤️ I need positive strong people around me xx

@ProperPickle @herecomesthechoochootrain hello, I also have grade 3 BC (hormone negative, her2 positive). I'm a few months ahead in terms of treatment - I finished chemo recently and am having a mastectomy on Thursday. I remember the turmoil of the early days well but I felt better once I had a treatment plan, and then was busy with the conveyor belt of appointments, treatment etc. Fingers crossed you can get started soon.

Happy birthday to your son @Enigma52 , enjoy your Nandos.

Sunshine and wine sound lovely @lucysmam , enjoy. It's raining here, again!

Thanks @demivolte and hope you're doing well now?

You're spot on with the feelings of turmoil and overwhelming sense of just wanting to get going with the treatment!

Thanks @demivolte . I hope your op goes well on Thursday.

@herecomesthechoochootrain I'm pleased your children seemed to take the news OK. As you say must be a relief to have told them now.

Your friend with the champagne sounds amazing. I would say that's the one positive thing about this whole thing so far - friends and family have been so lovely and supportive.

@Enigma52 Happy Birthday to your DS.
@demivolte hope the op goes well on Thursday.

Im so sorry I haven't read the full thread but I'm terrified. I have had pain in my breast for a couple of months now, no lump and so I waited a while to see if it was hormonal but no change. Then I got pregnant. Eventually I went to see a Dr (I'm not in the UK) he could feel thickening and an ultrasound showed a collection of fluid but he wasn't concerned as it was not solid. But today, the day after that appointment I suddenly thought of inflammatory breast cancer and I googled it and I'm terrified that's what I have. I'm going back to the same Dr tomorrow and will ask him to do a biopsy or something to reassure me but Jesus Christ I'm terrified right now.

It's almost midnight where I am and I'm lying between my 2 and 4 year old, no idea how I am going to sleep tonight (or any night for that matter). Fuck fuck fuck. I'm hoping it's not IBC but everything fits. Sorry for just offloading this panic on here. I'd not even told anyone about the scan or pain. I didn't want to worry DH as he lost his grandparents and mum to cancers in quick succession (they all had rare aggressive cancer's so me having a rare aggressive cancer too would just be...Jesus...I can't even think about it). I sent DH a panicked rambling text as soon as I'd thought of IBC and I'm sure he'll worry. He's away for work and not back until Thursday.