Making one small change each week

[ToriTheStoryteller]

I can't do overhauls, I don't want to count calories but I recognise that I'm living in a way that isn't making me feel very happy or healthy.

So, I'm going to make one change starting today, then add in another next week, and so on. By the end of the year I'm hoping that will ads up to a significant change for the better in how I feel, look and live.

Anyone else up for a more gentle alternative to massive resolutions? I'll update each week anyway even if no-one replies, so I record what I've done😂.

Week 1: No phone use after 8pm. I'm hoping that will improve my sleep, it's got out of hand in the last few months.

Well - I thought this weekend would end in guilt about over indulgence. In fact, my depression has reared it's ugly head. Today all I managed was a walk near the sea and to cook a tea filled with veggies and protein. Telling myself as I would anyone else that these little wins feel enough 🙂

@Bubidoo Tea with plenty of veggies is definitely a win, especially if you're feeling low. Don't be too hard on yourself x

Bumping the thread has reminded me to take today's vitamins too.

Hey everyone. How is the challenge going for you all?

I have had to go against my natural instinct to come back on here (normally I would feel guilty that I haven't seen something through, leave it longer, feel more guilty, etc etc) but it feels like an anchor to bring me back to good habits and not giving up on my long term goals.

Life is being a bit tough but I also need to get out of my default mentality of "I need to hibernate until I feel better THEN contact friends, make an effort with health, etc" because it's doing all those things that will make me feel better. Simple huh? 😜

So to recap on all the habits so far:

1. No phone us after 8am.
2. 15 min walk every morning.
3. 10 mins self-care morning and night - moisturiser, make-up, flossing, vitamins, HRT...
4. 1 piece of fruit with lunch.
5. Stick to work hours unless one-off issues.
6. Contact one friend/relation each week.
7. No snacks.
8. Herbal tea at night.

Two new ones that have started:

1. Meal planning and keeping fridge tidy so less food is wasted.

10. Only eat at kitchen table.

Most of this is now ingrained and I don't really think too much about it so I'm really happy about it. Need to work on No.6 again and No.1 is still a bit of a challenge but more often than not, I'm reading in bed instead of reaching automatically for the phone.
No. 10 has been really positive. We had got to a point where all eating was in the lounge but being at the table gives us a pause to the noise and distraction of TV, and helps us to chat more, eat more healthily (as the veg/salad is in the middle of the table so we can take seconds if we want instead of loading the plate and taking it to a different room) or just sit quietly if we feel like it.

Hope everyone is doing OK, would be lovely to hear how your habits are fitting in with your lives now.🙂

(Edited as the numbering went wrong🤣🙃)

Oh ffs. Still wrong and now the paragraphs are huge. Bit of a glitch (either MN or my brain) this morning!

I’ve ditched the apple and orange every day, but now I have some kefir and a square of dark choc every day.
The green tea every day has become a habit that I look forward too. But still not managed to stop the frothy coffees - must do better!
Looking through other people’s posts makes me feel better as I’m already doing some of them, like I always eat at the table/take supplements/HRT/drink a glass of water every morning, so it’s a reminder that I’m doing better than I think IYKWIM.

I have made myself some yoga, hip/back exercise cards (stick women doing yoga as my drawing skills leave something to be desired).

Started with arthritis (osteo) last year so losing weight and keeping things supple and strong will pay me dividends.

What a great idea @ToriTheStoryteller I always try to change too much at the one time and fail miserably.

This week I'm going to concentrate on three things:

1. Eat 5x fruit / veg a day
2. Stay off Facebook - I am deleting my account which requires not logging in for 30 days. I keep picking my phone up and mindlessly typing in Facebook. Must try hard not to log in as I never feel good afterwards
3. Delete photos on my phone every night - I've ended up with 9168 photos on my phone and never have any storage. I'm aiming to delete 100 every night to bring it right down then the habit will be to delete the ones from that day that I don't need and keep the total number to a minimum. Eventually I would like to start making scrapbooks but that's not for right now (only been on my to do list for a few years!)

Joining in to follow this thread. I’ve had a terrible six months starting with a terrible disc herniation which threw exercise and socialising out of the window. I realised in that time that I’m maybe a bit isolated - have a lovely family but perhaps really any good friends. I think that’s been on me as I’ve found it hard to be the one or arrange or make the big effort. I’m very paranoid people find me dull and it hits me like a wave when trying to make conversation with people. I also enjoy my solitary hobbies so it’s easy to just default to that with any tiny pockets of free time. Currently choked with the cold in June and could just do with a bit of a plan to feel like I’m working towards a more well balanced life. I have a quite challenging 5yo and a 2yo so often feel a bit drained. My swaps I’ve managed are

1. kefir, frozen berries and low sugar granola for breakfast instead of cereal
2. found a good face cleanser and do this every night before bed
3. I had cleared out the freezer and it was so much easier to see what we had and able to easily store and access chopped herbs etc but it’s filled up again
4. have failed at the Facebook thing logged out and stayed off for some time but always end up back on Very inspiring to read about the changes everyone is making. They really will all add up

Lovely to have a few new people joining!

Great idea re photos on the phone. I can lose 10 minutes scrolling for a photo of a recipe so I should add that for one of my changes.

@Inafarawayland I relate to your need to put yourself back out there following a tendency to isolate from friends. One of my habits has been to contact someone once a week...not the same person, the pressure of that would freak me out😆. So I aim to either text, email, phone or meet with someone each week. If I'm feeling a bit frazzled, then it will just be a short message, but I'm probably averaging once a month for face to face catch ups with people which is a big improvement for me.🙂

Onto a new week.

11. 5 minutes meditation each day. Not sure which part of the day is best (morning before the chaos starts or evening to get over the day😂) and I have no idea what to do....but I'm aiming to spend the 5 minutes sitting down (preferably outside), thinking of absolutely NOTHING. I think it will be hard not to let worries, lists and random ideas creep in but I need a small period of silence in my life right now!

Well, last week was a disaster. Lots of shit hit the fan and then to top it all off, two years after my last period, I came on. It explains why I ate more than my own bodyweight for four days felt more hormonal and volatile than I ever have before.😂

So, more effort needed this week for sure.
11. Didn't even get stated so that starts today.
12. I'm starting 5:2. Not a small change by any means but I need more structure in my diet to make sure I get healthier. I did the low day on Saturday and it was fine, I actually enjoyed thinking about what I was going to eat to make sure I was packing the nutrients into the small volume I'd be eating.
I downloaded the NHS weight loss app and its really easy to track what I'm eating on there. I've never counted calories before so at least it does it for me until I get a grasp on how much is likely to be in different foods.

Good luck for the new week everyone.😍

@ToriTheStoryteller thats such a good idea and an easy target. I think I’m in a bit of a slump so never feel I have anything to say to anyone. I’ve lost my confidence a bit and must admit feel a bit lonely. But that seems very do-able to reach out to different people once a week and everything has to start with the first small steps

It's been really good for me, as I would normally put too much pressure on myself, eg "call someone once a week" or "go out with the team after work" then feel shit because I can't face it. But knowing that the minimum is sending a quick message to one person means I'm actually going beyond that some weeks: last week I actually spoke to TWO people on an actual phone AND stayed outside to chat to my neighbour instead of lying about dinner being ready.😂

I went full fat after seeing how it is meant to make you fuller for longer. I was eating a mini cheese instead of a biscuit, full fat Greek yogurt for pudding instead of crumble and custard etc. But a blood test showed that my cholesterol is on the higher side of normal, so I went back to my old way of eating, and I’ve really gone backwards. I’ve hit the biscuits and the puddings. So god knows what you’re supposed to do, I can’t seem to win, and I’m hungry!

Sorry to hear that DustyLee123. It's so bloody hard isn't it, trying to find something that suits you, your lifestyle and where you are emotionally. For me, a control freak, I can't believe it's taken all these years to realise that a structured diet is perfect for my personality!

Some of what you've said in other posts is similar to how my life is going to the moment: seeing a future that I don't want to face (for myself selfishly but also for the person I love), so it is incredibly hard to try and prioritise yourself or have any energy for those little things.

I read something last night (no idea where now 😜) that talked about trying to think in terms of what good things you can add instead of trying to give up something: eg, instead of saying you'd love to give up the biscuits (which will make you feel shit if you 'fail'), go back to one of your ideas of having an apple first - you might still have biscuits but it might only be two, whereas without an apple first you might have had four.

Give yourself a break - life can be shite.❤️

I used to do a rule where I could eat anything I wanted but I'd have to have a glass of water first. That worked well for me. I'll go back to that I think.

Glad the thread has been resurrected. I need to come back for accountability as my positive habits have all started to slip over recent weeks!

I've been taking my phone up to bed with me so my self imposed cut off point has faded away. Clearly I have no self control so am restarting with a 10pm cut off and phone downstairs all night.

Will gradually reintroduce my other changes too.

I’m going to go back to one of my original fails, to have an apple and orange every day. If I want a biscuit, I have to have eaten them first, then i can have a biscuit if I still want one.
Ive added in a small glass of kefir every day, as I’ve read that feeding your gut bugs helps in other parts of your body too.
And I’ve also added in a small glass of beetroot juice ( luckily I like beetroot) as I think my BP is too high. Doctor’s not concerned, but the bottom number is too near 90 for my liking.

Right, 1st of July tomorrow so I've got a few changes to try and reintroduce/maintain:

1. Making packed lunches for office days
2. Cutting down the amount of tea I drink and replacing with water
3. Listening to audio books during my commute
4. No crisps. Fruit as a snack instead

Lovely to see this still going, considering I haven't been brilliant about updating every week!

I'd say I'm managing to stick to my habits 75% of the time, but definitely need to get the phone use back on track then that will make everything a little easier to fit in as my brain won't be quite as tired and fuzzy.

So, this week's habit is very easy: water my house plants regularly. I walk past them all every day and feel bad that they look sorry for themselves, but my guilt means i leave them so the next day they look worse. Then DH eventually gets fed up and drowns them so they can plod on for another couple of weeks.

I know that by feeding and watering them I will feel so much better seeing them looking healthy and green in every room.

Well it’s all gone badly wrong since my last post. The beetroot juice made me feel sick, as did the daily apple/orange, and I’ve got out of the habit of the kefir.
I prefer to eat veg than the apple/orange, so I’m doing that instead. And I’d rather eat beetroot than drink it!

I'm sorry if this isn't the place for a rant, but you seem a friendly bunch really focused on improving your lives and I suppose I'm looking for support.

I'm just really struggling with getting through life at the moment. I get up at 5.30 every day for a my full time job that pokes at my anxiety having just woken up several times in the night hearing a voice in my head telling me life will never be as good as it is right now but that I am worthless and ugly. I have a 3 YO I adore but can of course be hard work and I feel so guilty sending him to nursery for such a long day. I get home again at 5.30, make the tea, do lunches and ironing for the next day. DP gets home and I make our tea. We are both too exhausted to really engage with each other. I count down to the weekend but despite DP taking our DS out to give me a break, I find it hard to relax knowing there's an overwhelming amount of house work to be done and the Monday dread rolls round by Saturday evening. It feels like my life isn't hugely difficult but I find it really hard.

I read some of these habits and feel really inspired but a failure when they don't stick. Is there one achievable habit you have found really has worked for you? I think achieving one thing right now would really help me.

Hi @Bubidoo welcome, yes we are pretty friendly on here!

As you can see, some of us have also been struggling. My aim when I started this was to add in one tiny change each week: life had other plans though, and so far I think I have about 9, and of those I'm reliably sticking to probably 7 or 8 each week. But the main thing is that I'm not beating myself up about the 'missing' 20 or so habits, or the 2 that I forget one week: I'm thinking "I've got 9 positive habits that I didn't have 7 months ago."

For me, the easiest habits have been where there's no real burden on me: adding a piece of fruit to my lunch and making sure I floss my teeth, moisturise and take my HRT and vitamins when I'm already in the bathroom to brush teeth. It's so easy to make a habit too hard, ie "do an hour's exercise every day" or "spend 4 hours every weekend batch cooking"!

Surprisingly, keeping up with relationships has also been a habit that I've kept to easily. I thought I'd struggle with that, as my tendency is to hibernate when life goes tits up, but lowering the pressure by saying I only need to text someone if I can't do a proper conversation, has really helped.

Join us, I'm sure we can help to add in a few positive changes.🙂

Re the lack of time and being too tired to engage with DH in the evening, we use WhatsApp for any life-admin type tasks. It's really helpful because it means we type a message when the shopping or car insurance or whatever pops into our head, then it can be dealt with quickly once back at home. It doesn't sound like it would make a difference, but because we already have any boring task on our radar, we tend to deal with it more quickly and early in the evening, rather than suddenly thinking at 9pm "oh shit we haven't done that...again" then being too tired to bother.

My houseplants are recovering!! I knew it would cheer me up to see them becoming greener and less droopy so that was an easy win to add.🙂

This week's habit is to spend time in the garden every day. Whether it's two hours of weeding or sitting for 10 mins with a cup of tea, it's something that always make me feel calm and happy.