mums/dads of older boys -can anyone tell me...

[MaryAnnSingleton]

..what the symptoms of a too tight foreskin might be ? would it hurt/be red/swollen ?

am doing some troubleshooting on ds's -being neurotic and worrying in case it is but it looks fine, not red or inflamed or swollen and he can wee ok. He does wee a lot, so was thinking maybe he had a urine infection

DS1 had a tight foreskin and had none of these symptoms. He couldn't pull the foreskin back and did complain of occasional pain, but he could wee OK and didn't have any infections.

He ended up having a circumcision.

Sounds like time for "willy exercises". DS had problem with this, so got him to start trying to pull it back a little bit each night at bathtime. Tip is to be very gentle and only pull it back as far as it will go without a fight, if you know what I mean. With time he was able to pull it right back and it's been fine ever since.

how old was he willow ? I remember ds pulling his back once when about 5 in the bath and being quite shocked by it - I think it makes him wary of trying again. I do try to get him to do it in the bath to keep it all clean but am not sure how far it should go...have asked dh to take a look,but he is a bit squeamish. Would it be worth going to the doctors ? He says it hurts sometimes but he often reports things as hurting when they are imaginary ills...he is quite neurotic about his health anyway !

any other ideas ?

does it look as it will pull back my sons was v tight he always seem to get a hard on when he wee,ed

Hi
Ds(11) has had problems since tiny with this. (oh how he would thank me for making this public ).

I am not an expert but have been to enough appoinments with experts to have some experience!

I would say if your ds could pull his down over the head when he was 5 he would not have anything to worry about. My ds's was nowhere near that loose and has only ever been pulled down that far by the willy doctor when he was about 9. Even though it caused ds obvious discomfort at the time and he still has infections the consultant (a nationwide 'expert') has assured us that this is quite normal and that many boys' foreskins do not loosen up until puberty.

the end bit is loose and it has pulled right back before ( the last time I saw him do this but that was a long time ago) - I'm just trying to guage what it should look like

thanks shimmy - I don't want to make him anxious by going on about it and trying to get him to manhandle his willy and cause him distress by trying to pull it back further than is comfortable.

Yes - meant to add ds's sign of a tight foreskin was the repeated bouts of ballanitis. (painful, red, swollen willy). The infections actually caused scarring on the foreskin making it less flexible. He was given steroid cream which acted miraculously to give ds a wide flexible stretchy foreskin. Unfortunately as soon as we stopped the cream the foreskin tightened up again like a trap!

Poor ds had ballanitis so often that the GP even seemed a bit annoyed with me bringing him in and asked why I didn't just use the cream I'd been thw last time.

there is no swelling or redness or anything- did the doctor not recommend circumcision ? or is the steroid stuff normal treatment ?

MAS what makes you think there is a problem?

We expected circumscision too but the doc made us feel we were overreacting as he said ds is within normal range and it would all clear up with puberty.

Infections definitely getting less now but ds of the age where he wont happily discuss foreskin stretching so getting hard to know if doc is right

I'm just trying to deal with various issues about wee-ing with ds. Trying to get him to shake and dab after a pee so that he doesn't get it on his pants (which he does a lot) Then I was thinking he might have a urinary infection as he does wee quite a lot, or at least feels he needs to go quite often -whether he actually produces much urine I'm not sure - it's difficult to monitor a ten year old - and then I was just in the bathroom when he was having a bath and telling him to rinse under the foreskin and wasn't sure whether the foreskin was moving back enough, he may not be pulling it back as far as it could go for fear of injuring himself - he is given to anxieties about his health anyway ! So I've kind of convinced myself something must be amiss but not sure what !
But the actual organ looks perfectly ok...just trying to decide whether to go to the doc or to just encourage gentle willy exercises in the bath with dh checking every so often...

God, are you supposed to do this! I've never done that with my boys, infact my older boys don't even let me in the bathroom with them let alone let examine their willies!!

Are you SURE this is sensible thing to do? I think you maybe being a bit 'over anxious'

He's TEN you're not serious are you?

I probably am kitty ! I'm trying to avoid making a problem where none exists but also wanting to help ds pee nicely and not have any problems with his plumbing !

do you think it's not necessary to be so vigilent in this department?

i never ever looked or enquired after ds

and he is now 19

i didn't even know they were supposed to do anything in particular an dpresumably it's finbe if they don't as he has never said anything

do people really er look into these things

No, I don't.

I would imagine that he finds it very embarrassing that you are taking such an interest in his willy.

If you're worried he might have an infection why not simply get his wee tested?

I probably will get his wee tested - I'm just trying to do the right thing that's all

Gentle willy exercises in the bath??! With DH checking ocasionally????!!!Cripes.. with respect, I think you are going to end up giving him issues about his willy if he doesn't have them already! In my experience, ten year olds are pretty much in charge of their own willies! And he will tell you if HE thinks there is a problem, esp, since he is so neurotic about his health...

ok ok - don't make me feel like a freak - how do I know - he's my first and only boy !