Cancer Support Thread 83 - Here comes the sun (hopefully)

[Silkierabbit]

Welcome to a supportive thread for anyone with cancer to discuss how things are going, ask for advice etc or discuss life in general.

Please feel free to join if you are going through tests as well, hopefully they will come back all clear but if not we are here to hold your hand through the journey.

Named the thread in honour of the lovely LeslieKnope who did thread 62 in the same title who is sadly no longer with us but inspired me with how she was so lovely and kind with stage 4 cancer in her 20s and also the lovely PurpleUnicorns. Thinking of you both. Hopefully there will be some sun inbetween the difficult days.

May be useful to do introductions at start of thread. I am 49, lobular breast cancer, diagnosed Nov 21, after sent for tests then after being dismissed as nothing by GP in June. 46mm and 17mm tumours with 1 lymph node involved. Had 2 surgeries, currently doing chemotherapy, radio next then hormone tablets. 1 husband and 2 kids 16 doing gcses and 15 with SN and mute. 1 Maine Coone kitten, 3 silkie chickens and 1 indoor rabbit.

@OriginalFloorboards oh man what a time you’re having! Poor you, must be like being on some kind of demonic rollercoaster. I’m hoping your breast lump turns out to be nothing but we are all here if you need to talk.

Hello again,

Thank you all for the kindness.

@Silkierabbit , you are right my sister found the change in her appearance difficult. She still looks beautiful though. She was always the beauty in our family, a young Audrey Hepburn my grandpa used to say . He was absolutely right. We have been looking though photos from childhood and teenage years, she always looked perfect. She worked in.NY in the 90"s to mid 2000's for a fashion designer and has always had an incredible sense of style.

I will have a look at the website you recommend, thank you. My sister has left so much in place, she will be with my nephew at every stage in his life.

She mentioned you in particular @Silkierabbit along with @MrsPnut as one of the super courageous GCSE moms.
Thank you for being so kind.

Love of love
Kathy x

Kathy/@Chicagocubs I have been thinking about how I would like to be remembered at the end. I think I would like to see an end to the endless inspiration, so brave etc,etc and think Victorious is better. Because I think every day we get up after diagnosis and face a new day or more shit(let's be honest) we are Victorious.
I'm sure that with the love and care that you have poured into your son over the years he will grow into a brilliant Man.
Xxxx

Thanks so much for your lovely message Kathy, sending lots of love to you. I am not brave at all, very anxious mouse here but its panic and carry on here, dont get much choice with cancer if you want to survive it. Though not such a mouse with the steroids more like a tiger.

Your sister sounds very beautiful inside and out and so do you.

Hi @Chicagocubs i’m so glad you are with your amazing sister. I’m so sorry to hear she’s taken a bad turn. We are all thinking of her and she’s in our thoughts. Much love to you too and I’m glad you’re with her, her husband and your nephew. I don’t know what words can give you comfort right now, there are none other than to send you all love xxx

Kathy

Sending much love to you all, I'm so sorry to hear your sister is not doing so well since her post on Sunday. 💐

HC (another GCSE mum)

@Chicagocubs & Kathy: it's very heartening to hear how you've come together in these most difficult and scary circumstances. You sound like a lovely family. I hope you have some lighter times and laughter all together, and that the famously temperemental British weather allows you to enjoy your garden when you want to!

Hello Kathy, thank you so much for letting us know how Chicagocubs is.

Please send her our love and let her know we’ll celebrate her darling boys GCSE results.

you write so beautifully about her and the love you have for each other is obvious. No wonder she was looking forward to seeing you so much. ❤️

Hello, Kathy, thank you and @Chicagocubs for your generosity in thinking of us at this hard time. I hope it is also a peaceful time and that any pain is being controlled as much as needed. Holding @Chicagocubs in my heart tonight even though we don’t know each other at all beyond words on a screen, and a shared experience.

Love to you, Chicagocubs and to your family.
It’s so unfair and nothing can make it ok.

When we collect DD2's results I shall raise a glass of Prosecco to your lovely son. ❤️x

Hi Kathy and @Chicagocubs, thank you for updating us all and I'm so sorry to hear the news. I'm hoping you're finding great comfort being together as a family. I'm thinking of you all and sending all my love Xxx

With the news about Deborah James and the press full of stories about brave cancer patients it is hard to forget the seriousness of our situation. All of us have learned how precious time with loved ones should be. I am glad @Chicagocubs has her family with her helping her face the end. Sending warmest wishes to you Kathy and all the family.
It makes me grateful for every day I have to enjoy on this earth and determined not to waste any of them.
I will soon be finishing my mad adventure having raised more than £4000 for the green cancer charity. I am pondering how I want to spend my time when I get home. Doing more of the things that bring me and my loved ones joy and less housework and weeding!
Sending love to all on the thread whether just starting to realise they have cancer or going through the treatment or learning to live with the aftermath.
A sombre Top xx

Hi everyone. I haven’t been on here for a while so just popping on to say hi. So many of you are facing challenging situations at the moment and I am in awe of your courage and fortitude.

I am still recovering from treatment even though it finished a while ago. I have needed further biopsies (clear) and have a list of side effects still present which I did not expect. I thought I would just revert to my pre cancer self. Since my diagnosis I also have a lot of friends in active treatment which in all honesty just astounds me. It seems relentless at times.

@Chicagocubs sending love and light. Your DS sounds wonderful and I am glad you are with your close family now.

This thread has helped me immensely over the past 15 months and I send my heartfelt thanks. I will pop on now and again though to say hello.

Sending love to you all x

Chicagocubs Thinking of you and your lovely sister and hope you aren't suffering too much.

Welcome JeanLannes Glad your further biopsies are clear but it is a bit sad when you realise life won't ever revert to how it was before.

Glad you have enjoyed your adventure Top and raised money for cancer charity as well.

I have finished chemo now and radio first call is on 4th July not sure when it will start but we are away in Cornwall the following week so maybe 1st week of school holidays. I hope it will just be 1 week of it plus the hormone tablets. Then its a long waiting list for reconstruction surgery though don't care too much about that atm. I did manage to keep about half my hair thanks to my frozen pea experiment, well once I cut it from long to bob length. It looks rubbish compared to before but will take any hair. I think my head has got wider on steroids as well to add to the chopped breast look as well. Glamorous this cancer lark. But at least no more steroids though I am supposed to do a steroid test for Cushing's but I am all tested out atm.

Podge Hope radio goes OK for you. I've heard its a lot easier than chemo so hopefully won't be too bad.

Sending love to everyone.

Chicagocubs This is the GCSE thread your sister posted on Kathy, www.mumsnet.com/talk/secondary/4566030-current-year-11-2-more-weeks-of-exams

We would love to hear your nephew results if you feel up to it, I am sure he will have made his Mum very proud. Just sitting them alone is already a great achievement with all you are facing.

I’m glad you are able to be with Kathy @Chicagocubs I think there are times on this journey when being with those that know us best is a help. I hope you go well with peace and love, surrounded by your family. Your son will carry you in his heart for ever, such is the power of a mother.

I’m having a tough week, it’s supposed to be my last one on phased return but I still feel very fragile. It’s a combination of lots of things but I am off today and will spend the day being kind to myself.

Lovely to see you all especially @HumphreysCorner and @JeanLannes. @TopOfTheCliff I can’t believe your adventure is on the homeward leg, it looks so exciting.

Dearest mumsnet ladies,

Thank you so much for your kind messages.
My beautiful sister passed away this morning just as dawn broke over London, with my darling nephew holding her hand. He told his mom how much he loved her and that she could go.There would be no more pain and that he would never forget everything she had taught him.It was as if she needed to hear him say this. Our hearts are broken.

We will take on her final journey back to the US and she will be laid to rest next to my grandparents. My parents will be waiting for her, something no parent should ever have to do. Nothing about this fair.

Even though you are all fighting you took the time to write such heartfelt messages for my sister.Your stories are an inspiration and your British sense of humour is a tonic.My sister loved living in London and it's easy to see why.

I will update on results day @Silkierabbit just as she wanted. Thank you for sending the link , you are so kind to think of that. Good luck to everyone also waiting. These kids are superstars.

Sending you all so much love , I will keep you all in my heart and pray that will all win your battle, beat the odds and get to grow old.I don't need to tell you to make the most of everyday because you are always doing that.

Keep up the fight , you are all such awesome women.

Love
Kathy and family xxx❤️
.

Rest in peace @Chicagocubs and sending so much love to you Kathy and all your family. I am keeping you all in my thoughts and prayers Xxx.

I am so very sorry Kathy for the loss of your beautiful sister and sending love to you, and her lovely son and family. Thank you for your lovely kind message and would love to hear the update on her son if you get chance.

Her son sounds like an amazing young man and if there is anything at all can do to help please let me know. I did contact Woolly Hugs on here and they said they do still make the remembrance blankets if that would help a little bit though appreciate you must have so much on. You give ideas of things for squares of things she liked and people knit a square each and send a blanket. So if she was like me and like Maine Coon kittens that would be one. I also have a 15 year old boy and a 16 year old girl and its heartbreaking he has lost him beautiful Mum so young. I am glad he sounds so wise and mature and sending you all love and hugs and thinking of you all.

Rest in peace @Chicagocubs , I’m so glad your son and sister could be with you.

I am so sorry for your loss Kathy, I will be raising a glass to her and your family tonight.

Sending all my love to @Chicagocubs and her family xxx

Dearest Kathy, I’m so sorry your beautiful sister has passed away.

Please look after yourself as you go through the difficult times ahead as it’s very obvious you will thinking of and be looking after everyone else around you.

Chicago’s son was very brave to help his darling mum on her way and he’s testimony to the family he comes from.

With much love and heartfelt thoughts to you and yours at this most awful of times. Chicago wasn’t part of our group for very long but she made such an impression on us and I suspect that was how it was in real life also.

❤️❤️❤️❤️@Chicagocubs and whole family.

Sorry to hear this, Chicago, and glad family were with her.
After hearing about Deborah James and seeing videos of her with her loving family its made me more conscious of the fact I have no family at all and will be alone eventually. Families are so important, and any disagreements and rifts should try to be healed in times like these