Emetophobia - I am so proud of myself but also so scared

[Artichokes]

I have posted before about my emetophobia and how when my DD first threw-up (in Sept) I felt I totally let her down by panicing and running away when she needed me most.

Well last night DD got the norovirus. Normally the mere thought of this would totally freak me out and stop me going out until I thought the epidemic was over. But I have sworn to myself I won't let emet affect my DD's upbringing and so throughout this epidemic I have continued going to toddler groups etc.

Last night DH was out and although I knew DD was coming down with a tummy bug I did not panic and did not insist DH come home. I put her to bed with a towel underneath her and checked her every hour. I managed to eat a normal dinner and not have a panic attack. And the worst happened. She was sick everywhere. I cleaned her up. I cuddled her (incredible for me to touch someone with an infectious tummy bug) and I got her back to sleep. Then it happened again and it was all in her hair. I cleaned her up as best I could but I couldn't wash her hair out without a full on bath at 1am. So I ended up letting her sleep next to me in bed with residual sick in her hair. I continued to cuddle and comfort her. Today she seems better.

I am so proud of myself. But also so scared. It seems very likely I will get ill soon and that has been my worst fear forever. I feel a bit sick already but don't know if it is in my head or for real. I have cancelled a dinner party that we were meant to go to tonight as I think it is likely DH or I will be ill by then. I am a bit sad I have cancelled as it means I am still letting my fear stop me doing things, but on balance I have done so much better than normal.

Thank you for reading this far if you have. I just needed to tell someone how I am feeling .

FANTASTIC artichokess

Well done

Brilliant

(And I feel pleasd with myself for reading this thread as normally my phobia prevents me from even opening anthing with a title like this one.)

Hope DD and you and DH are well soon

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Well done Artichokes. You have done the sensible thing cancelling the dinner because you are quite right that you or your DH might get sick. It may be though that you will be fine but you could carry it to others.

It is a very virulent bug and it is passed so easily. Most of us had it over Christmas and my elderly Dad is still in hospital because he was so ill on admission with dehydration.

I was only sick once personally so perhaps you will have a short lived episoade too if you do get it.

Thank you both (and thank you for reading PaperChain - I too usually avoid these threads).

I am glad you think I was right to cancel the dinner Mears. You have made me feel it might have been a normal, rational decision rather than a symptom of my phobia. I am also glad to hear you were only sick once. If I get badly ill now I am scared it will undo my good work and make me beleive I was wrong to take the risks I did. If I can get away lightly then it might re-enforce my behaviour last night.

I am so proud of myself that I want to search out my old CBT therapist just to boast. He would never beleive that I had managed this so calmly .

Please, please let DH and me be OK now...

Well done Artichokes. Brilliant. As someone with my own issues (not a phobia) I am full of admiration for you.

Sending you health vibes.

how fantastic!

I also would have cancelled dinner out of concern for the other guests attending. I don't have any phobia concerning this, so i think you made a rational and normal decision

really pleased for you to hear how you have coped with this. Try not to stress too much now.

God! I'm impressed - and envious. I would have run screaming for the hills. Really hope you don't get it - that would be my worst fear as well.

Well done!!!

Well done Artichokes!!

You did brilliantly and you should absolutely feel proud of yourself!

The bit where you cuddled your DD was amazing. I haven't quite mastered that yet although my heart is aching to cuddle my dc's when they're ill. It takes all my willpower to not run screaming out of the frontdoor.

But anyway..well done you

Well done Artichokes, you did BRILLIANTLY!! I too am ashamed that I would not have been able to cuddle my dc. I too think that you did the right thing cancelling the dinner party as you can carry the virus with you.

Fingers and everything else crossed you don't get it yourself.

Well I am not emetophobic, but would also have cancelled the dinner party. I think that that is a perfectly reasonable, responsible and normal decision to make.
Well done you!

s0000 BRAVE! WELL DONE. i AM PANTS ABOUT SICK TOO, PANIC ATTACKS ETC ETC. but it it does get easier. ive now got 3 dcs and am sso much better than in the past.

well done you are brilliant

Very well done - I hate it when anyone is sick but luckily don't have panic attacks. I think you did absolutely brilliantly - and you were definitely right to cancel the dinner party. Hope your DD is completely better soon - and that you and DH escape the bug.

well done you are brilliant

well done you are brilliant

Thanks everyone (esp Ineedapoo who told me I was brilliant 3 times ).

DD was still not quite right this afternoon. Hardly ate a thing all day. But I hugged and kissed her loads and tried not to think about contagion.

I am just really determined that my phobia will not impact on DD. It has impacted on my own life quite enough and I will do whatever it takes to ensure I do not pass it on to DD. Right now I am feeling very strong, in the past I would never have been able to feel like I do now if I had known I was likely to have a bug coming. I just hope this inner strength stays!

swell done!!!

brilliant
brilliant
nbrilliant
brilliant!!!!!!!

Full of admiration Artichokes. Hope I could do the same as you. And do take note of the non-phobics on this thread: its perfectly normal NOT to go out when someone in your household has been ill so recently. That's not phobic behaviour at all and not letting anything run your life. That's just the way it is with children.

How are you feeling artichokes? Keep washing your hands once an hour ...

Fingers crossed etc.

(I am having CBT for emetophobia at the moment and am told its okay for me to wash my hands a lot, so long as it doesn't stop me doing anything else. So I hope that suggestion is not too OTT for you. Again, I believe the frequent hand-washing thing is something that a non-phobic person would do in your circs).

I am so impressed, you are a complete star, your dd is so lucky to have such a wonderful mummy!!

sorry computer playing up but you are bril...

Well done. I can just about manage to cuddle dd when she has it. (as long as I have a towel handy) But sleeping in the same bed! That's really impressive. I wish I could do the same

I had no choice but to sleep in bed with her as she was so distressed and ill that putting her back in her cot alone would have been beyond cruel. She is only 17 months.

I am feeling OK at the moment Daphne, thanks for asking. My stomach aches a bit but it could be psychological. If it is physical I will just have to cope. My worst fear is that DH and I get it at the same time. Then I am not sure how I would cope. But I must not think about it. I am doing everything I can to keep busy and not obsess.

Keep your fingers crossed for the Artichoke household tonight!

Stomach ache could just be stress Arti. And even if you and DH do get it, very unlikely that it will be in the same 12 hour window. More likely that one will follow the other. Sorry! (if either of you do get it at all, of course!).