Found a lump in my breast, not coping

[Reallyhadenough4]

I found a lump in one of my breasts. My dr can feel it too so has referred me to the breast clinic and I’m waiting for the appointment to come through.

The lump is within the breast tissue, it feels smooth, not painful and it is moveable. The dr said it didn’t feel tethered which I’m assuming is a good thing. He says it’s about 5 mm.

We have a history or breast cancer in the family.

I’m not coping with this at all. I suffer with anxiety, have on and off for about 30 years. I’m not eating or sleeping much, I’m terrified of what this could do to my family. I know nobody on here can tell me what this is, but I’m really looking for reassurance until I get this checked out. Please be kind I feel like I’m sinking. I’ve not googled anything, I know from experience dr Google never offers reassurance!!

The waiting is the very worst part. Please contact your gp about your mental health. They will understand.

Thank you so much everyone. Thank you for understanding. I think I’m going to have to ring my gp. I’m in pain in my knees and am thinking some pretty awful things. Probably the stress is causing my arthritis to flair up.

@MrsPnut thank you for holding my hand, I need that.

Thank you everyone for encouraging me to ring my dr.

@BeanAnTae. Yes my appointment letter arrived today. It’s in about 2 weeks time.

I have anxiety and had a cancer scare aged 20 ao I know how it feels (thankfully I turned out not to have cancer). The thing to hold on to is that most 2 week referrals are not cancer.

I've been through this. My lump was a fibro adenoma so absolutely safe and not treatment needed.

I spoke to the duty gp today. She has given me some medication, I guess there’s not a lot more she can do for me. My anxiety and depression has really got a grip of me now and I’m feeling pretty bad. She was understanding, but I find it so much easier face to face. I had forgotten how bad anxiety and depression can feel.

I’m glad you’ve managed to get some meds to help you get through the next few weeks.
No matter how bad you feel, you have a 100% track record of getting through your bad days so far. You can do this even though it is tough.

Solidarity, @Reallyhadenough4 - I’m also currently awaiting a breast clinic referral after seeing the GP about my lumpy breast! I have had a referral twice before a long time ago and the lumps were benign lumpy breast tissue; I’ve just been a bit worried the last couple of weeks about changes to the feel of the lumps.

GP said the threshold for referral to the breast clinic is, quote, “incredibly low”, and they are keen post-Covid to catch any women who are worried about breast changes so she’d refer me anyway even though she couldn’t feel anything sinister. It’s most likely that a smooth lump is benign and normal but it’s always a good thing to check. It’s stressful and anxious waiting though; I’m still finding it worrying. Handhold and sending good vibes to you too

Holding your hand. It sounds exactly like a benign little cyst. Hugs.

Oh Op.. anyone would feel worried and anxious. Be kind to yourself, it is a worrying time and you are allowed to feel crap. I only have one similar experience and that was when I had to have a biopsy on a mole that had suddenly grown and gone all weird. I had to wait a week and it was bloody awful. I had a whole week of constant anxiety attacks and feeling 'unreal' I went straight to worst case scenario. Of course it turned out to be a benign growth under the mole- a fibrous growth of some kind, this could easily be the case for you.

Thank you everyone for your kindness.

@nightwakingmoon I hope you get your appointment soon. Im finding the waiting really tough, although I don’t want to go to the appointment.

Thank you to everyone who has replied, I have read all of your messages several times.

I've found some of the links that I found useful while I was waiting. I had to wait a month due to illness forcing me to cancel my initial appt. www.google.com/amp/s/www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/presence-mind/201803/how-manage-breast-cancer-screeningdiagnosis-anxiety%3famp

In exactly the same position as you OP. I found the lump a few weeks ago, appointment at the breast clinic is in a fortnight. I'm swinging wildly between telling myself it's nothing and to stop being such a drama queen, and sobbing uncontrollably because I keep waking up thinking about dying.

It's tough. But you can do it!!

@BeanAnTae thank you! That’s really helpful, I’m not googling anything as it would increase my anxiety, but it also means I’m not finding anything helpful.

@vesperlindor I’m the same, at times I’m positive and then just crying! I keep waking up with a start in the middle of the night. Sorry you are going through this too.

My mental health has taken a real nose dive now. I’m hardly able to eat and can’t function. I’ve spoken to the dr again, but they were really unhelpful this time. Thank you to everyone who has taken the time to help me.

I have recently finished treatment for breast cancer. Your reaction is perfectly normal. The anxiety levels you go through between discovering a lump and diagnosis (whether good or bad) is indescribable.
Most women find that once diagnosed the anxiety levels rapidly decrease. If you have breast cancer you can focus on the treatment. If you haven’t you can celebrate.
You will not get a full treatment plan but will start treatment quickly, there are no waiting lists for cancer. The waiting is due to the need for multi discipline meetings where the whole team discuss and plan treatment.
Pushing hard for a diagnosis is just not possible, a biopsy has to be examined by a number of people to make sure they all agree on the diagnosis. They also need as much information as possible to pass on to the breast care team so you receive a very bespoke treatment.
A breast lump can take between 2-5 years to reach a size that can be felt so your lump has been with you for at least two years. A few weeks is not going to alter your treatment or outcome.
All that said I really hope that all your fears are for nothing and it is one of the many benign causes of lumps in your breast and that in a few weeks you will be able to relax.

I understand how you feel. The anxiety is horrific.

I found a small (moveable) lump which turned out to be nothing. They gave me a mammogram and a scan.

If you are finding the wait unbearable and can afford private then I would do that, you couid get a next day appointment

Thank you both for replying. @Angrymum22 the thought that the lump could have been there that long is terrifying! I do hope that your treatment has gone well.

I think I’m going to have to move over to the mental health board.

Have you tried mindfulness? Essentially it's practicing being in the moment each time your thoughts run off. So each time you think about the lump, notice it and move your though to away from it (it could be to something in the present moment, a funny TV programme, a song, a meal)

But essentially keep noticing when you're thinking about it and keep actively moving your thoughts to something else.

Hello OP please take reassurance in the fact the lump is moveable, breast cancer very rarely presents in this way. It is much more likely to be a painless cyst or blocked milk duct. 💐💐

@reallyhadenough4 how are you doing?

@BeanAnTae thank you so much for asking. I’ve had my appointment, the level of anxiety I felt before hand was horrendous. They have taken biopsies, but have told me they think it’s nothing sinister. I have some more waiting. I’m still fairly anxious, but not as much as I was. I’m assuming they wouldn’t falsely reassure me, they did seem quite positive at the appointment.

That's really good news. Thank you for the update. x

Really thanks for the update - sounds like they are being extra careful but are happy with what they've seen. I was checked in November but had a month's wait because an appointment had to be cancelled due to what turned out to be a false positive Covid test. I was so determined to make the second appointment that I isolated from the rest of my family so I couldn't catch Covid in the meantime! But being left alone with your thoughts is hard as you imagine the worst. I was very nervous before going in but the consultant was just lovely. I really hope you don't have to wait long for confirmation. Well done for facing into getting checked.

Thank you both.

@BeanAnTae I accidentally bookmarked your post. I can’t imagine having to wait so long, that must have been tough.