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Original poster

Could I be allergic to my boyfriend - recurrent thrush??

54 replies

kittykat818 · 02/12/2021 10:07

Hi, I have been getting thrush ever since I met my current boyfriend. He is the first person I have slept with so I don't know if it is a problem with me or just that our PH's are affecting each other. I made sure I clean after sex and even use an acti gel which helps make the vagina more acidic after sex. We also always use the pull-out method as we thought it would help. I have been tested for diabetes and had countless blood tests, I have also tried a non-sugar diet, changing to different underwear, taking probiotics daily and not using any soap down there. I have also done two 6 month courses of fluconazole (it goes away while I take it and then comes back once I finish the course). So I feel like I have tried everything and I am worried that me and my boyfriend are physically just not a good match. I have been with him for four years and we have just bought our own place together and other than this issue the relationship is great. I have even tried coming off the combined pill to see if this could solve the issue but the thrush always comes back. I am really really desperate to find a solution.

OP posts:
Original poster
kittykat818 · 02/12/2021 13:59

@MamaSass Thank you! I have done the 6-month course of fluconazole twice already, while I am on it the thrush goes away and then it also stays away for the next 6 months and then comes back again every month. I may ask for the GP to give it to me again, I am just worried that I will become resistant to the medicine.

OP posts:
Sillydoggy · 02/12/2021 14:26

Sounds like you have tried so many things, so frustrating!

I had thrush symptoms for years and learnt a few things ....

My thrush came and went with my menstrual cycle - worse when my period was about to start.
It was always made worse by tampons
It was made worse by ultra absorbent thin sanitary towels.
Best thing to moisturise the vulva is basic natural oil (olive, grape seed or similar).
Other forms of irritation can seem like thrush so dr needs to test for it before treating. My Recent irritation required oestrogen cream rather than thrush treatment but then i am getting older!
Sex aggravates any form of irritation especially if there is not enough natural lubrication - try olive oil beforehand if that is the case. Washing removes lubrication so also aggravates irritation.

I cut the bulk of the thrush out through an anti candida diet for 9 months - no sugar, vinegar, or yeast. The initial few weeks of cutting out sugar was really difficult and then I felt better on the diet than before. Definitely was worth it for me but I still had to avoid the above.

Hope some of that is useful.

Sadless · 02/12/2021 14:43

I had a problem for years which may have been thrush or something similar. Been Drs alot with it then one Dr said it might actually be like a eczema not thrush and give me a steriod cream within 3 days if felt alot better. I have had swabs at times which has confirmed thrush and been on 6 months worth of tablets. Even recently was checked for diabetes after me complaining again. Now if it feels like it's starting I put germolene on straight away.
Sometimes it like the discharge burns my skins. Maybe it could be a skin issue worth thinking about.

Sal

WhatMattersMost · 02/12/2021 15:14

@Sadless

I had a problem for years which may have been thrush or something similar. Been Drs alot with it then one Dr said it might actually be like a eczema not thrush and give me a steriod cream within 3 days if felt alot better. I have had swabs at times which has confirmed thrush and been on 6 months worth of tablets. Even recently was checked for diabetes after me complaining again. Now if it feels like it's starting I put germolene on straight away. Sometimes it like the discharge burns my skins. Maybe it could be a skin issue worth thinking about.

Sal

Now that's interesting, because I have guttate psoriasis which flares up when I'm stressed and/or when my diet is poor, and is very often heralded by itchy skin for several weeks - which will then develop into a rash if I don't take evasive action. And I also have intermittent bouts of "thrush" that last weeks and resist any treatment by thrush medications.

hmmm ....

WhatMattersMost · 02/12/2021 15:15

[quote kittykat818]@WhatMattersMost Hi, how long did you cut out sugar for? And is this including fruit, carbs etc?

My issue is that I did not have any of these problems until I started having sex which makes me think that it is not an issue with me specifically but rather me and my boyfriend throwing each others ph balances off.[/quote]
I have to say, kitty, that I have tended to get thrush symptoms with partners who have not worked out. Almost as if my body has known before I have. I'll link this with my post above about psoriasis, which has always alerted me to shitty relationship choices.

Original poster
kittykat818 · 02/12/2021 15:32

@WhatMattersMost Yes, I have heard others say the same which is what worries me, that some women are just physically not compatible. It is difficult as me and my partner are very happy and have just got a place together, the only problem is the thrush which is very frustrating.

OP posts:
imnotareindeer · 02/12/2021 15:34

I had exactly this with my ex husband.I used to do everything like you, with the tights, various washing non washing routines, nothing perfumes, herbal remedies. I was on the pill too and even tried coming off that and various things like the implant. Anti itch creams, herbs, yoghurt, meditation

I don't know if it was thrush in the end, but I ditched the husband, he did make me quite stressed, but I've since had a stressful career and nothing like it since. So I can only think I was being reinfected by him or my PH was out of whack after being treated for the first thrush infection. I remember now getting thrush after I first slept with him.

In the end I used replens and sorted out my vagina, took a while ( maybe 3 months) and I can say that some of the stuff that came out with the replen was gross, it almost cleansed. Then never suffered since. I do not use this now and I'm fine. I am careful with showering and use Tesco baby bath and shower gel once a day and a water wipe to wipe vulva at night.

What I can say is at the end of using replen I had a new partner and no issues with thrush. I spent a lot of time and money sorting this and the doctors were so unhelpful. I hope this might works for you. I'm 10 years on now and 2 kids later.

www.replens.co.uk/our-products

Original poster
kittykat818 · 02/12/2021 16:08

@imnotareindeer thank you for your comment! Can I ask what made you turn to replens and do you think it helped or was it more your change in partner? Thanks!

OP posts:
Toomanyscentedcandles · 02/12/2021 16:11

Replens is just a moisturiser though? It has nothing to do with thrush?

tumtitum · 02/12/2021 16:16

Have you tried an anti Candida diet? Not just sugar but cutting out a whole load of stuff and most common allergens, no alcohol etc. it's hard to start but you add stuff back in to see what affects you. I had years of recurrent thrush and the thing that helps me most now is no sugar, no gluten and limited dairy. The diet literally changed my life! I only get a flare up now if I have a chocolate binge or drink too much wine etc

Homerenonovice · 02/12/2021 16:21

Have you had an STI check OP? Not saying your partner has cheated but it could have been something he has picked up previously.

EmpressCixi · 02/12/2021 16:23

You need to both be treated for it simultaneously. Thrush is often symptomless in men. He is likely reinventing you every time you stop treatment.

I don’t understand the PH thing.

Obsidiansphere · 02/12/2021 16:28

I’d be using condoms

BrimfulOfBaba · 02/12/2021 16:38

When you say your partner has been treating himself too, how has he been doing so? When this happened to me with a partner, we both took canesten and didn't have sex until we were both finished with it.

It's very unlikely you are throwing each others ph balances off.

Original poster
kittykat818 · 02/12/2021 16:47

@Homerenonovice Hey, yeah I have. Even recently when I went to the STI clinic to check for thrush (couldn't see my GP that day) I did an std test too and all came back negative.

@BrimfulOfBaba @EmpressCixi Hi both, we have both treated ourselves with fluconazole and used the Canesten cream, I have gone months in the past not getting thrush, and then it comes back so I don't think we are passing it back and forth atm.

OP posts:
imnotareindeer · 02/12/2021 17:14

I think a combination, I only did the replens after he left. In the last 6 months we hadn't had sex very often as relationship was rocky, but I still had an ongoing issue. So I would give it a go as it's pretty inexpensive, I think I probably spent about £50 in the end. I know it's a cliche, but it changed my life and obviously it's sold in normal places, it's not some dodgy treatment. I would say it's more used by menopausal women, I have no idea how I came by it for my issue age 27, but I did. I was always online looking for answers. I hope it helps you if you try it.

imnotareindeer · 02/12/2021 17:16

I'd like to say I also had many negative thrush tests via doctors so it you've also had negative tests it might be something that present like thrush, or an imbalance caused by thrush previously, but isn't thrush now.

WakeUpLockie · 02/12/2021 17:21

Yep this was me. Not allergic to husband as far as I know. Thrush every month for 7 years. Sadly no-one cared, I saw a consultant for 2 years who ended up saying 'what do you want me to do, it's normal'. I'm sorry to say that I don't have an answer - it stopped when I had my first baby, which is extreme and obvs don't have a baby just for that.
I had thrush when I got engaged, on my wedding day, on my honeymoon. It led to vulvodynia which is a nerve condition from them being on alert all the time.
I shelled out for canesten soft gel pessaries every month which I ended up taking preventatively and helped minimise the thrush every month.

Mad thing is, I've moved areas and it seems that consultant did too- she is now my consultant for this pregnancy! What are the bloody chances! Not happy!

Wotsitsits · 02/12/2021 17:23

Balanitis implies his foreskin doesn't retract fully so he can't clean all around the head of the penis. The thrush or bad bacteria will be living there. Without being able to clean the skin he is going to be stuck taking oral meds.

If he goes to a sexual health clinic they can swab him, review his history, and refer him on for surgery which would allow him to clean properly.

Lovemydaxie · 02/12/2021 17:55

Probiotics have helped my daughter.

Original poster
kittykat818 · 02/12/2021 18:04

@Lovemydaxie can I ask if you know what probiotics she takes?

OP posts:
Woodswoman · 02/12/2021 18:26

Do you always wee and wash straight after sex? If I don’t then I get thrush.

Original poster
kittykat818 · 02/12/2021 21:28

@Woodswoman Hey, I do yeah. I also try to go to the toilet and make sure I clean the area with warm water.

OP posts:
Lovemydaxie · 03/12/2021 08:24

@kittykat818 she has found Symprove excellent but also has used any high strength ones from the health good shop. You can buy Symprove online but it is expensive. She was suffering for several years but this has sorted it out. Good luck.

Doubledoorsontogarden · 03/12/2021 08:29

I would try abstaining for a couple of weeks, both treat with trush products, both use mouthwash. Then resume using condoms for a while. It will break the cycle

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