Looks like I have breast cancer - would appreciate advice and support.

[anorak]

Well guess what, they day I arrived to live in Bermuda found a lump in my breast. Went to the doctor, got rushed to hospital for mammograms and ultrasound. Been told they suspect "extensive DCIS". Went back in for a core biopsy the day before yesterday and have to go for MRI scan this afternoon, should get the results of these next week sometime.

The hospital is lovely, the staff are lovely, DH's job pays private medical insurance so I am very lucky that I will have good treatment. I've been here two weeks and two days, they have certainly been quick and efficient so far and I'm very pleased to have been offered the MRI.

And for anyone who doesn't know what DCIS is (I didn't), it's a non-invasive form of cancer that tends to confine itself to the area of origin.

Sorry Anorak

Hopefully, by the sounds of it, you have caught it early enough, and if it's non-invasive then this must be a Good Thing.

Good luck and make sure you look after yourself.

So sorry anorak Will think of you and send you some reiki xx

oh Anorak Will keep fingers and toes crossed and hope that the news is as good as it can be. xxx

Hi Anorak - sorry, I don't have any advice for you, but will be sending you lots of positive thoughts. I'm glad that the process of investigation is moving quickly for you.

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Oh no, that looks awful - I meant, I'm glad you're not having to hang around for weeks waiting to find things out.

That still doesn't sound good, but I hope you know what I mean.

i'm am so sorry - what a shock
sounds like treatment is being sorted quickly

Oh I am so sorry, anorak. Keeping everything crossed for you.xx

Oh crap Anorak, I am sorry that your adventure has been blighted by this

However take a leaf out of my bf's book. Her mum has had breast cancer three times and her aunt has had it twice. When her doc siad to her what do you think the chances are of you getting it? She said I'm 99 per cent sure I will get it but I am 100 per cent sure I won't die from it because I am incredibly vigilant and will get any problems dealt with immediately.
She has already had a couple of lumps removed But she has the right attitude imo and you will be fine as long as you get thoroughly checked regularly.
Good luck and take care xx

Omg anorak - I am so sorry.

Since I've been in America, I've seen a great deal of visibility for this charitable organisation that fights breast cancer and supports those suffering from it. Perhaps it could offer some practical and emotional support:

www.komen.org/intradoc-cgi/idc_cgi_isapi.dll?IdcService=SS_GET_PAGE&nodeId=300

Thinking of you. xx

Yes doodle, that's the site I've been using for info, it's very good isn't it?

The support thing is a big issue - DH is fab but have had an argument with DD (15) because she has been invited out today for the first time by new friends here. So refused to be back in time to babysit DS when we go to the hospital later. I wasn't going to tell her what was happening as I didn't want to worry her but I felt I had to tell her in the end, but it made no difference. She is not coming back early enough to look after him and I am hurt. Think my children treat me like shit and I don't know how it came to this.

So sorry to hear that Anorak. What rotten luck to find a lump on your first day in Bermuda, but at least it sounds as though you will benefit from a very efficient medical service there.I wish you all the best and hope that this might be just a false alarm.xx

Oh Anorak, she doesn't have a clue, she will be so sorry when she is older But she is only 15 and under the circumstances I thnk the your dh can kick her arse and tell her that she can't go if she is not prepared to come back to help out.

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Thanks Earlybird, that looks a useful site.

You know Doodle I was thinking about a diary. It was my intention to try my hand at making it as a writer while living here and not being allowed to work in the conventional sense for the next three years, and I wondered if I diary might spark other projects.

Hi anorak, I'm sorry to hear this but very pleased to hear about your treatment starting so quickly.

Sorry about dd. Teenagers can be so, well, up their own arses can't they!

Diary sounds like a fabulous idea.

oh anorak fuck. horrible news. great that your treatment is 'free' and good. but horrible for you.

sending hippydippy idiot healing vibes....

xxx

oh anorak - so sorry such sad sad news what a fecking shock. many people recommend complematary therapies eg aromatherapty, reiki, talking therapies, peer support from other women. bit lost for words

some links for you
"breastcancer orgr DCIS info"

"pharmaceutical company some suggested links"

"USA information"

Thanks for the links SM and thanks for the hippydippy idiot healing vibes, noddy's long-distance reiki (I knew it didn't involve touching, but that's amazing!) and everyone's good wishes you have cheered me up.

I've always been one of those people who though it could happen to me so I don't really feel shocked, although it's been a bit of a whirlwind with doctor so and so calling and saying 'be at the hospital at 12 tomorrow' and suchlike.

The next minute you are sitting by the pool in the warm sunshine watching DS mess about in the water and feeling that life is very much a roller-coaster! I think (although it's early days) that it looks like I have a very good chance of surviving this but if I don't it's a blimmin lovely place to die! But life is confusingly full of contrasts at the moment, that's for sure!

no advice, but im thinking of you x

anrak - keep talking, not the time for stiff up lip - thinking of you

Yes I will keep talking since I have not yet made any friends here and my DH is out of the house from 7 in the morning till 6.30 at night, DD is out from 7 till 5 and DS only wants to talk about Scooby Doo, Spongebob Squarepants, football, and his mates at school

I find I am very tired atm and fall asleep about 9 or 10 at night without even trying so it really limits my time with DH, and DD is doing that teenage hibernating thing.

I suppose I am more upset about her reaction than I am about anything else. I wasn't going to tell her because I didn't want to worry her but I felt I had to tell her yesterday when I was trying to get her to organise coming home early to look after DS. But it made no difference. Do you think it is taking time to sink in with her? Because to be honest her reaction has all been to do with herself, I don't seem to come in to the picture.

adolescents are wired differently so may not necessarily show the expected range or norm of reactions - but most certainly DD will be hurting and bad too

dd might be too scared to say
afraid of losing face
in denial
minimizing it's importance and relevance to avoid being hurt

my father was v ill when i was 12 and i did all the above, avoidance is a major coping strategy. i swanned off to school disco when he was at hosp getting treatment
still feel deeply ashamed of myself

give it time - you are all affected