Stool sample novice ... How?

[TMIspecimenneeded]

For the first time in my adult life, I have to give a stool sample.

Excuse my utter green-ness in this area, but how the chuff do I get it from here to in there without making an unholy mess?
And, how much is needed?

Boaking at the thought of carrying it around and then having to hand it to the doctors receptionist too!

calpol syringe up the jacksie, withdraw precisely 5ml.

(Serious answer: probably poo in a container you’re willing to throw away, like an old Tupperware, then use a teaspoon. Also throw that away. Although the calpol syringe wouldn’t be a bad idea! I don’t think you need to give them something that’s overbrimming.)

I'm picking up a (specimen jar, I assume?) tomorrow when I go for a blood test

Simpler to put lots of toilet tissue in the toilet bowl, poo on top then use the scoop that should come with your sample jar to scoop some out. No need to throw away Tupperware or teaspoons 😂

you should get a stool sample pot from the doc's reception or whoever has requested the test.
it is a small clear pot with screw lid.
best to put your name in capitals and date of birth on the label before you go in loo.
use a vinyl glove, or failing that a small plastic bag over your hand to catch some of the stool and then pt some inside the pot.
they dont need much.
try to use the middle part, to avoid contamination from the outside of your body. similar to a mid-stream urine sample.
i usually then tie the pot inside a nappy bag.
there is a collection point in doc's reception, or now may be other instructions eg to post in letterbox.
whoever asked for the sample should have told you how to deliver it.

I had to do this a couple of months ago. I just ‘caught’ the poo in an old Tupperware and threw away. The specimen pot has a little scoop in it - you only give them a little sample.

Was a bit odd walking back to the surgery with a small pot of poo in my pocket (wrapped in a plastic bag) and having to post through the sample post box 😂😩

When I did one I was given the specimen jar and a little spatula. Did the poo in an old takeaway container and then used spatula to scoop in required amount in to jar. Empty poo in to toilet, double bag takeaway container, throw in bin. Not the most pleasant experience. Good luck!

They give you a teeny spatula in a bottle. It's only a little.

Put paper on the front of the loo and try and poop onto that. Or onto a card covered in loo roll. Shake the loo roll and poop into the toilet when it's done. Bin the cardboard.

Oh god, I'm not normally squeamish at all but this one has me bloody sweating!

If I have to use a teaspoon, no question about it going straight in the bin. My morning coffee would have me going green at the very thought otherwise.

You get a mini spatula in the sample bottle.
As has been said, shite on a poo paper hammock and chip a corner off.

Most jars for a stool sample have a little spoon as part of the lid. They are, however, tiny, thin tubes and in no way could you actually poo into the actual jar. Ask the clinic if they can give you a disposable tray or kidney dish in addition to the sample container. The disposable trays are made of compressed, recycled paper and can be thrown away after.

If not, as the other poster said, just use a clean take-away food container, ice cream container etc then scoop off stool to put into the sample container. You dont need to fill the pot BTW, just a teaspoon sized scoop is more than enough!

Cling film the bowl of your toilet - allow a little sag in the middle.

Do your number 2.

Using a disposable spoon, scoop what you need from your ‘deposit’ into the specimen jar provided.

Dispose of unwanted spoon, cling film and excess number 2.

Wrap specimen pot in a plastic bag inside a paper bag and deliver to surgery.

Job done!

please dont put too much toilet paper in the pan as it can easily block the drains, and that affects all our health.
if you practice now, you can just put 2-3 square down at the front of the toilet, above the water line, and practice angling the delivery.
good luck. it's easy when you know how, and with practice !

I work with these samples and all I can say is please see up the container properly 🤣

You dont need to use a teaspoon, anything disposable would do if the lid doenst have one attached. A wooden lollipop stick, icelolly stick, those disposable wooden chopsticks, the corner of a tupperware/take-away food lid woud all work.

do not attempt to flush cling film or anything else, except a reasonable quantity of toilet paper and human waste, down the toilet.

Thank you everyone, this is all great advice.

I almost feel like I achieve a higher degree of Adult after doing this 🤣

The top of the lid of the jar should have a scoop. I recommend using an old ice cream container or a takeaway container that has been scrupulously cleaned and dried first, then hold that in the loo while you poo. Collect your sample in the jar, put the lid on, label it if necessary, pop the bag with the sample in the fridge (covered, obvs), discard excess poo and box, go and wash your paws. Drop sample to collection centre/g0p/whatever ASAP.

Why bin stuff? Just clean it with bleach, raw meat can have all sorts of nasties but you don't bin the knife every time

(I used cloth nappies and did EC with DD, not scared of poo)

I wouldn't advise the cling film method at all!!!! Majority of people urinate just before or straight after opening their bowels, so unless you remove the cling film asap, you will end up with a urine puddle on the floor around the toilet bowl! It will also contaminate the stool sample. Just hold an old take-away container behind you, so any urine still goes into the toilet bowl.

You don’t need to cling film the entire bowl!!!

Just make a hammock with a dip. It’s really not rocket science.

Again why flush cling film? Just wrap it and bin. ??????

I just used the little scoop in the lid and reached through mid poo and scraped a bit off the main event. Totally boak experience but didn't require any additional equipment.

I won't be using cling film and I certainly know not to try to flush it away, I'm not that green

I have done this for many years for my son with crohns. Just use an old container, Chinese meal ones are great and easy to use. The pots have miniature spoons, so just scrap the poo and put it in the pot.
Write on the label before you add any sample, make sure it is dated and the time is put on also.
When you have done this as many times as I have it doesn't faze you at all.

I've had to do many, and I seem to try a different way every time to figure out how on earth is the easiest. I've still no idea.

The easiest I've ever done is in hospital when they give you one of those cardboard tubs to catch it in, so any container you're happy to chuck away would probably work the same. Or ask if they have a cardboard vomit bowl at the Dr's you can have?

The pot has a little scoop attached to the lid, so no need to worry about teaspoons!