How do I cure Early Waking Insomnia?!

[Curtainsdrawn]

I’m desperate!
Every morning like clockwork, I wake at 4:30am. I go to sleep at 10pm, so it’s a decent amount of sleep but not nearly enough for me, and I’m permanently exhausted. I look after two preschool DC all day, and I feel almost panicked; I NEED this extra energy that I’m somehow depriving myself of!
As soon as I start waking up I feel dread, because I just know it’s crazy early yet again.

I don’t drink alcohol or caffeine, or smoke. I don’t take any medication and I do a 30 min HIIT on YouTube every morning before the kids are up. I eat healthily and my weight is fine, so I can’t see a physical reason why this happens.

When I wake early I usually try lying for about an hour to get back to sleep (sometimes listening to calming music) but after that I give in and just read (or browse MN!) until the alarm goes off.

Has anyone cured themselves of this, or found a way to improve it?! I feel like it’s slowly killing me, I’m so so tired and it’s just torturous to wake so early and know it’ll be a tougher day yet again thanks to the fatigue.

I get this. I think its stress related for me. I occasionally take the boots own brand sleeping tablets which are amazing. I can sleep like a log on them, but still react to the baby monitor (groggily) if needed. My DC sleep through tho thankfully. Walking before them is just offensive.

I find I'm needing to wake to go to the toilet, so have been limiting evening drinks with some success.

Woke this morning early but crucially didnt check time/pick up phone and did drift back off

There is an app called Sleepedy - I've just looked at it to see how much it costs so seems abou £48 a month - but provides support while you make changes. From what I've read most 'cures' involve limiting your time in bed. So after a short spell of lying awake you get up and do something to pass the time only returning to bed when sleepy. I have to say that without support of some sort I can't see me dragging myself from a warm bed on a cold winters morning to do errr the ironing? A jigsaw? (Tasks should be relaxing).
It warns that it is not a quick fix but having always been a poor sleeper I find things worsening with age so will give it a go and report back to mn in a month or two.

This is me.....

Peri-menopause is NOT helping either.

www.theguardian.com/world/2020/oct/23/the-zzz-factor-how-coronavirus-has-wreaked-havoc-with-our-sleep

I cannot sleep longer than 6 hours before I wake up needing a wee. It doesn’t matter how little I drink in the hours leading up to bedtime, I still wake with a full bladder.

Then once I’m awake that’s it - my mind starts whirring thinking about everything and nothing and I get more and more frustrated. So I get up and am exhausted for the rest of the day.
Rinse and repeat. It’s shit.

You have my sympathies - I have suffered from this since I was a teenager (I'm in my 50s now).

With me, it is always stress-related. Unfortunately I don't have an answer - I've tried magnesium and lots of other supplements.

I embrace it now - I love baking so I often get up and bake. I hate just lying in bed.

Sometimes I have a nap on the sofa at about 8am but pre-Covid that was when the rest of the family were up and about so not conducive to snoozing.

My cats love the early breakfast and the family like the early baking so it works well for everyone else just not me!

Sorry OP that I don't have any solutions. I use it as an early warning that my depression is getting worse, and in the short term enjoy the peace and quiet to do some baking.

Thanks for so many replies and some great ideas. It’s comforting to know I’m not the only one struggling with this!

It doesn’t happen all the time and I don’t feel particularly stressed right now, but this has been mentioned a few times upthread as a trigger so maybe it’s an early indicator from my body that I’m slowly building up stress!

Also I’m loathe to do the sleep deprivation technique but I might try and stay up tonight until 11pm......urgh!

I’ve bought a box of Nytol too as a last resort!!

I’m going to try some meditation tonight and also no screens before bed, and see if that makes any difference.

Those of you that get up and do something/make the most of the early morning, are you feeling horrendously tired when you do this? Do you have to drag yourself out of bed and force yourself to get going with something? I’m so exhausted when I wake up that I just lie there for a couple of hours!

I wish I knew the answer! Nothing I've tried helps.

I've gone the other way and fully embraced it so I know I usually wake at 4:30am so try and get to bed for 8:30pm if I can. Then at least I'm getting 8hrs ish. It started when I had a baby and was up all the time. Totally ruined my good sleep and hasn't got any better even now she's two.

Same here . I wake between 3-4am . Sitting downstairs now watching my guilty pleasures on tv . Just wish I could just have a full nights sleep.

Me too. Usually awake around 3am.
My sleep went to pot when my parents both died within a year of each other a year or so ago.

Then Covid has has a direct effect - not going out in the evening which I did several times a week saw my bedtime creep forward. I’m finding it really difficult to stay up until what was for me a normal bedtime of say 11.30/12.00. I’m less active during the day both physically and mentally.

I always get up - some days I go back to bed and have a successful ‘second sleep’ of a few hours. Most days not.

I need to get back to later bedtime, more activity somehow and am reading with interest magnesium/melatonin ideas also.

Support all.

I've been waking at 3.45am on the dot for what feels like weeks. I don't usually go to sleep until somewhere between 11pm and midnight, 1am if I'm unlucky and I don't get the nodding-off sensation, so it seems I'm getting by on 4-5 hours a night.

I don't feel especially tired though - I've never been one for having to get 8 hours sleep. The worst thing is laying awake from 3.45am to just after 5, then finally drifting off into a lovely sleep only to be woken by DH getting up for work (and bringing me a cup of tea) at 6am. Ooof.

Me too - never had a problem until this last few months. Think it is perimenopause related. Going to try the magnesium spray to see if that helps

Early morning is when our cortisol levels peak, so if we are are anxious and stressed, this can result in higher levels and awakening.

The menopause will also affect cortisol levels for some women.

I wake up at 4am on the dot most nights. I find that doing breathing exercises work. It took a few weeks to get used to it but it now works 8 out if 10 times.

@dontdisturbmenow that’s interesting, what breathing exercises do you use?

@RickOShay, I use the Calm app. I've tried Headspace and the Fitbit mindfulness apps but prefer Calm personally.

The breathing technique is all about focusing on the inhale and exhale. The breathing itself is relaxing and the focusing on it takes your mind away from worrying matters.

I track mine, & have been tracking it for about 2 years

Awake 01.00-05.00

Mine is during ovulation for about 3 nights, then around 4 days before my period for 2 nights, the night before my actual period I sleep for 10 hours.

Thank you @dontdisturbmenow
I sometimes tense and then relax my muscles, but I haven’t tried breathing.
I will give it a go
I wouldn’t mind waking up early, but I’m fed up of being so tired all the time. No puff for anything.

Terminal insomnia. I have this. It's nothing to do with anxiety. It's something to do with an adrenaline rush human bodies are programmed to have at about 4am. Either go to bed later or earlier. You can't shift 4am.

And here we are again .

Yup, hello all. I had a bad dream, had to go to the loo, then the cat loudly hurked up a fur ball.

Morning. I've been the same 4/430 for the last few years, will nytol really work? I may try it I'm desperate!

Another one checking in. I wake anywhere between 2-5am every night, regardless of what time I’ve gone to bed. It’s been going on for around 3 years, I’m 42 and have fibromyalgia, anxiety and OCD and take a ton of meds, some of which are supposed to make me sleepy- oh the irony.

I now use the time to my advantage and get things done for the day ahead ( I’m a SAHM ) and my dc are both in school/college.

I tend to be tired again after a couple of hours so will go and snuggle up on the sofa for an hour with some meditation music on.

Once I’m awake that’s it for me, I just get up and come downstairs and keep lighting to a minimum. My eyesight is fantastic

No advice really but letting you know you’re not alone

I might get up soon . My husband never wakes through the night . Thing is I still feel tired but I just toss and turn .

I have had this about two years now.

Bed gyoicly between 00:00 and 02:00 then awake 03:30 to 04:00.

I "slept through" to 04:45 this morning after going to bed at 1, and that was with the help of Tamazapem as I knew I didn't have to be out of the house until lunchtime and had hoped for more than 3 and a half hours.

Its beyond draining. All tracked on the watch and average about 2.5 hours with plenty of nights where I don't get a single wink.

Its miserable and really not healthy

I’m with you this morning. Been trying to get back off since about 3 and have finally given in and are up with a cup of tea and mumsnet.