Needing to lose weight - why do I eat more cr*p?

[mears]

I am getting fatter by the day and keep resolving to start dieting tomorrow. I ate a bar of hazelnut chocolate because it was in the cupboard ( don't know who bought it) followed closely by an Echo chocolate biscuit. Watched a programme tonight about women resorting to liposuction to change shape and thought to myself 'they just have no will power'.
Have just finished a mug of hot chocolate with a pile of scooshy whipped cream on top. I just seem to have an insatiable desire to eat total cr*p.
What will it take to stop me stuffing my face? Any tips?

Sorry mears, no tips, but lots of sympathy. I too need to lose some weight (approx 2.5 stones), but have absolutely no will to do it. I enjoy what I eat. Dh is the same, so we're trying to be good at the moment; he's on a full-on health-kick, whereas I'm taking it a bit more cautiously - trying not to eat inbetween meals, eat more fruit/veg and less crap, only drinking at the weekends and hoping that if I combine that with some form of exercise then I will at least be able to get rid of my stomach, which is just gross.
My mum died of heart disease at the age of 52, her dad died around the same age of the same thing, so I really need to be careful. Having said that, my mum also had ms, so obviously there were complications.
Anyway, sorry again for no tips, but glad to hear someone else finds it as hard as me.

mears, you have my total sympathy.
It is one of the great mysteries of life why we do this (Stuff ourselves full of crp then feel bad about it later then eat more crp )
I used to think it was a womens' problem untill I met dh and he is just the same.
I suppose on a very basic level it is comfort eating but that does not necessarily mean you are unhappy. I seem to eat and drink more when I AM happy as I adopt a more devil may care attitude.
What is also a bit of a mystery is at what point do we think "enough's enough" AND start to do something about it.
The fact you are posting this suggests you may have reached the "enough is enough" stage. Whether you are ready to do something about it is another matter.
You can't bottle motivation unfortunately, but you may find one day soon you wake up with some. Once you get the bit between your teeth and start seeing the pounds drop off that gets the momentum going.
How to lose the weigh is of course the same old story - eat less and move more .
Maybe we will see you on one of the slimming threads soon?

I can totally sympathise as well - I could do with shifting about 2 stone. I lost a lot of weight about 6 months before trying for a baby using the atkins diet. It worked a treat - lost 3 stone in 5 months and felt healthy, never hungry all the time.Not sure how I got back to being so big again - actually that is a huge lie, I know exactly how I got that big again - I gave in to my huge constant craving for chocolate. I would give up my evening meal for 2 bars of chocolate instead, I am ashamed to say.
I am thinking about trying an alternative to dieting this time - might buy one of those electric wobbling belts that jiggle your blubber around and give little electric shocks to your muscles. I reckon I could multitask and do the hoovering as well. What do you reckon??

Jaytree I reckon the only thing that would give you would be clean carpets

You really made me laugh Jaytree and Jasper! I tried that wobbly thing years ago at a salon. It was horrible, loads of electric pulses going through your thighs and stomach and bum and this smug skinny woman coming in every 5 minutes to say "You could stand it if I turned it up a bit, couldn't you?" Nooooooo, I can't, it's horrible. Lost an insy winsy pathetic bit of weight all over but hundreds of pounds from my bank account. So no advice really Mears, except I did give up alcohol for a month recently and it did help a bit, reckon I lost a few pounds. Don't eat dairy so no chocolate for me anyway, so really have no idea why I'm fat! Actually, I'm lying too: in my case it's Olive oil, bread and wine...

I went on a dairy free diet and the weight just dropped off, I also stopped suffering from hay fever and my sinuses improved a lot. Maybe the weight loss was because I couldn't stand tea with soya milk so cut out all the caffeine drinks and as a result I stopped craving chocolate (I had a 'serious' chocolate problem before that). I have recently started eating more carob and dark chocolate - G & B Maya Gold mmmmmmmmm! and the weight is coming back a little. I'm also addicted to cornflakes at the moment (about 4 bowls a day!). Good job kelloggs have got an offer on now - 1kg for £1.54 - might last me a couple of days.

I'm exactly the same Mears. Each night, I go to bed vowing to start my diet again in the morning, but each morning greed takes over. I was doing so well too, I had lost 1 stone and 5 lbs. I have put 4 lbs back on since I hit the 'plateau' stage. Yesterday, I ate a huge, and I mean HUGE bag of pick 'n' mix. I felt so disgusted with myself, but couldn't stop until I had eaten them all.

Ho Hum, diet starts tomorrow!

Sympathies Mears - this sounds like one of my little jaunts around the cupboards! Luckily dh is a real pig (but skinny as a rake), so I never feel too bad about it as he always manages to eat even more chocolate and cake than me.

However, I do have the following piece of advice which works for me when I have the willpower (it needs re-doing every couple of months!): basically I think it's all about re-educating yourself to eat. So make sure that when you do eat anything you do it with no distractions (i.e. TV on or reading at the same time). Focus entirely on the food, and each mouthful and make sure you chew it really well before swallowing and never put the next mouthful in until it's all gone. In between each mouthful put your knife and fork down and sit back to experience the sensation of slowly being filled up by the food. This all sounds a bit weird, but if you do it for a week or two you may find that you approach food differently and while you won't need to eat in the laborious, ridiculous way suggested above, you also may not want to eat in the eating-without-even-really-tasting-it way. The other thing, when you feel hungry, try a glass of sparkling water first, as often I think thirst can be mistaken for hunger. Good luck!

Hi Mears - I know just how you feel. Last year when dd was born, I was delighted to be just below pre-baby weight (lost weight whilst pregnant!!). However, due to a combination of being tired, hungry, just not bothering and, of course, a return of the chocolate craving I gained a considerable amount of weight. In Jan I joined WW determined to get the weight off - but I fell of the wagon about 5 times between Jan and June. I couldn't understand it - I was so happy with my dd, ds and my dh - but I still ate far too much. I can remember stuffing my face with several bars of chocolate and still nibbling the children's leftovers

Anyway, to cut a long story short, I suddenly felt different (don't know why) and in July rejoined WW (I think Kim must have almost given up on me), but I feel more focused. I've managed to lose 1½ stone since July, and have ONLY got 6 stone more to go I know it's not a short-term thing, it's a change forever. But this is for me, to make me feel better and to help me catch ds when he runs away Seriously, it's really hard to make that first move, but it's just one day at a time - and so what if I have a bar of chocolate - I write it down and get on.

You sound as though you've reached the point where you've decided you've had enough. If you can, join WW I find them incredibly helpful. I've tried on my own often enough to realise that I need a bit of help. Wishing you all the best, with love and understanding. Deb xx

Mears
Having been a stauch Anti WW campaigner - too american, too evangelical, too blinking public for my liking, I gave in about 6 weeks ago and joined with a friend of mine.

I've lost 6.5 lbs, and have another stone to go, and we bully and cajole each other into going each week to the meeting. There is always a bit of competition between us as to how much we've lost, and if we've both lost, we go and celebrate round the corner with a cappuchino.

So, against my better judgement, it does seem to work.

See if you can go with a friend who also needs to lose weight. You never know, it might work for you!

Your sympathies are lost on Mears, I am a supposed good friend of said ganet. I was chatting to her on the phone this evening initially whilst munching a packet of crisps, later I had to call her back and was nibbling away on some frosties, her sharp retort to me was 'no wonder you are gross!' Quickly realising her scathing words were more than a little harsh she did say that 'I realy suited being gross' with friends like this who needs enemies?

mamosa it is heartening to hear that the real life Mears is just as caring and eloquent as her cyberpersona

mamosa it is heartening to hear that the real life Mears is just as caring and eloquent as her cyberpersona

I did add that mamosa would not suit being thin

Poor old mamosa!
Speaking personnally, it amazes me not merely how much c*p I will eat, but also how much c*p I will take from other people while conning myself that I look OK. I am always being asked when the baby is due (8 years ago), and one of my dear children quite accurately compared my stomach to a bowl of strawberry blancmange I'd just turned out. And yet I can con myself again and again that I look OK, or that it doesn't matter, or that I could lose it if I wanted to. I'm very slowly climbing back on the WW wagon again, having started out all enthusiastic, but now I keep telling myself 'but I don't want to', and motivation is very hard to find.

JayTree - what is the atkins diet? you did really well to lose all that weight, I know I need to lose some weight but I really think my lack of will power is down to feeling so exhausted all the time.

My parents have my little boy enough during the week, one afternoon and two evenings - and there are no gyms with creshe facilities in my area.

So by the time he is in bed and ive washed up, made bottles, had a bath, made tomorrows lunchbox I just want to go to sleep!

Im glad I am not the only one feeling this way. Im thinking about joining WW, is it easy to follow? my weaknesses are dairy/carbohydrates and choc.. sob sob

Alley22 if your weakness is dairy/carb then Atkins is either NOT for you, or is the very thing for you!
There are lots of weight loss gurus (how about a slagging off the weight loss gurus thread?)who think some of us are sensitive/addicted to carbohydrates and only a low carb diet will work for them.
It is basically a low carbohydrate diet, works very well if you can stick to it, may or may not be harmful to your general health depending on whose research you want to believe.
Put "Atkins " into a search on Mumsnet, there is quite a lot about it here already.

Personally I would recommend you give WW a try.

I started at 11.8 and am now 9.10 which has taken me about 4 months. It is not that hard to follow and you can eat anything so long as you include it in your allowance.
I have done NO exercise to speak of either and have had severl lapses and a few eeks where I gained half a pound or stayed the same
.
The interesting thing about this thread is it is discussing the motivation aspect of weight loss. That really is the crux of the matter - we all know how to lose weight so why is it so hard to do?
Once I got over my aversions to WW ( I had several) I actually really enjoy the meetings and the knowledge I will be getting weighed on Monday nights ( and paying £4.50 for the privilege) is VERY motivating. It is a bit like being at school and wanting to please the teacher

I meant weeks but it was probably a Freudian slip

Mears - I don't know your situation, do you have a partner at home who could babysit while you go to an aerobics class/for a swim? The only way I can stop myself eating crap (and I do cook and we all eat a good diet, but I can all too often convince myself that I am hungry enough for a massive cheese sandwich or chocolate between meals)is to do regular exercise. It makes me feel very different about my body and much less likely to binge. It also gives you more energy. I have a horror of being mumsy and fat (can't do much about being mumsy and old though!)which is what motivates me to do regular aerobics. I believe a balanced diet and regular exercise is the most effective way to lose weight and keep it off. WW sounds like a good way to go if you need motivation. Good luck anyway.
Talking of which, has anyone been watching this series of Fat Friends?

Mamosa and mears you've made me laugh properly for the first time today- gross indeed!(Nothing serious I hasten to add- just a bit of a grim plodding day full of little hiccups I could've done without.)

I'm an orally fixated gannet too- all my sympathy fellow gorgers.

Oh - here's the big question... Slimmers World V Weight Watchers - who gets your vote? I did SW for about a year and did shift nearly three stone. Problem is that in the last year I've managed to put one of them back on. For some reason I just can't face going back to SW. Firstly because I'm embarassed that I've put the weight back on, and secondly because the meetings were so dull that I was tempted to pull out a jar of nutella and start eating it with a spoon just to see what would happen. Yes, the idea of others being able to congratulate you if you lost some weight did work for a while, but then I got really bored sitting there while 30 or more women confessed to having eaten a kit kat. It was a bit too evangelical for my liking and I got really bored with not mixing carbs and protein. Should I go back and give it another go? The woman in charge is a bit fluffy for my liking too. Or should I give WW a go. Help! Am getting p'd off as all the lovely clothes I bought last year don't fit!

Give ww a whirl. IMO not eating carbs and protein together is baloney. Sure, you'll lose weight on their plan but only because your energy in is less than your energy out. That is the only way to lose weight however fancily you package it.
Sometimes the meetings at my ww are pretty boring too. The members just sit slumped in their chairs and rarely join in which is a pity.
I do think the weekly weigh in is very motivating and you'll get that at ANY club so give it a go and join the other mumsnet fatties

Thanks for al the input to this thread. I really feel I am close to getting that motivation starting. Only thing is we are going to Florida in October so I think it is not worth idieting now but is that me just putting feeble excuses in my way. I suppose if I put my mind to it I could lose half a stone beforehand. By the way, hope you will all give a warm welcome to mamosa ( who isn't really gross). She has been warned not to blow my cover

Mears, don't even think about dieting before going to Florida.
Welcome Mamosa!
Any friend of Mears is particularly welcome here

ps just how fat is she in real life??

Mamosa is not actually much bigger than me. She actually cracks me up most of the time. One of her most frequent sayings as she demolishes a bar of chocolate is 'I have to work hard to maintain this figure' @O @O