Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
General health

Mumsnet doesn't verify the qualifications of users. If you have medical concerns, please consult a healthcare professional.

Original poster

painkiller addiction, im ashamed of myself, i need help

60 replies

ashamedofme · 26/07/2007 21:10

hi i am a regular but ive had to name change.

i had an operation years ago and was given painkillers at the time. (co-dydromol) since then ive been taking any strong painkiller i can find. i dont know exactly why i take them but they make me feel slightly lightheaded and i like this feeling. i did stop taking them while i was pregnant without trouble so i really thought i didnt have a problem.

Over the last few months i have found one type that are strong and i can buy over the counter and i have been taking these. ive now started to feel lethargic in the mornings and ive been sick quite a lot. in the last couple of weeks ive tried to stop taking them but by the end of the day i get stomach cramps, i sweat, feel sick and have a massive headache. the only thing that stops these symptoms is taking the painkillers. so now i know i have a serious problem (i even have to go to different chemists to get them) the trouble is if i go to my GP and admit it, what will happen? will they take my baby away? i feel really stupid for getting myself into this situation and dont know if ive done long term damage to myself. does anyone know if i can stop myself by reducing slow or to suffer the cramps and go 'cold turkey' any advice please?

OP posts:
Spidermama · 26/07/2007 21:13

I really think you need to go to the GP. At the moment you're just guessing what the effects might have been but you need someone who knows what they're talking about. There's no way they'd take your kids from you because of this.

If you really can't face the GP, I would google the pills and try to find out as much as you can about them and their long term side effects. (That might be unecessarily scary though.)

Kayran · 26/07/2007 21:32

Oh Sweetie do not get yourself into such a desperate state. The likliehood of your baby being taken away is next to nil (unless you are locking her in the cupboard and not telling us...!) The reason you get the cramps etc and especially the headaches is probably becuase the tablets have coedine in them. I do have to take painkillers regularly for a medical condition but have, I admit, taken them when I am stressed just to get that slightly light headed spaced out feeling. I knew I was in trouble when i had to check my bag, the car etc to make sure all my little places had their share of tablets. I did get the courage to talk to my gp (i was worried i was an addict but also worried she would stop the prescriptions.) She told me that it is almost impossible to cause long term damage and she could not recommend coming off the tablets as it was more important to control the pain. However if the tablets are causing you to be sleepy etc make sure you are not also suffering from mild depression and this is the reason you are wanting to 'fly' occasionally. It is a real problem these days because of the increased strength of over the counter tablets. Keep your chin up and try and just set little targets (I will wait until 10 am and then take them if i need, I will wait until lunchtime etc..)

Original poster
ashamedofme · 26/07/2007 21:58

thank you for replying. you may well be right with the mild depression thing. i do take them to make my drowsy so that i can sleep. the baby is quite a handful so i sleep when she does and my days do seem gloomy at the moment. i have tried to go as long as possible before i take them. some days i can go a long while but then i feel like shit and they are the first thing i reach for iyswim. i have pills hidden too, all over the place. i feel a bit calmer now thank you. its taken me a while to pluck up the courage to post this!

OP posts:
daisyandbabybootoo · 26/07/2007 22:09

how old is your baby? It's not unfeasible that you are suffering from PND and that your reliance on the pills are a symptom of this. You really need to see your GP. Can you book a double appointment and get someone to look after the baby so that you have the time to talk with no distractions.

It's great that you found the courage to post on here as this is the first step in getting better. They most certainly won't take your baby away, for either abusing the pills or PND.

(I know this as I attend the psychiatric depts mother and baby clininc for bad AND/PND and all of the residential patients, some of whom are very ill with psychosis, have their babies in with them.)

There is help out there and I hope that you have the strenght to get it. The worst thing you can do though is try and stop cold turkey as you will keep getting the horrible withdrawal symptoms so you need to be helped to wean yourself off them.

Good Luck and I hope you get things sorted out soon

michaelad · 26/07/2007 22:15

God, I get the same lovely fuzzy feeling from Codydromol and my GP has just given me a 100 pack. Did originally get them after an Op last year too, found them brilliant with all kinds of pain.

Guess I better be careful!

michaelad · 26/07/2007 22:16

How long ago was your op?

Fireflyfairy2 · 26/07/2007 22:35

Those tablets are what the doc give me when I had pains they thought may have been appendix or cysts.

I felt funny taking them, fell asleep almost as soon I had swallowed them & I remember loving the feeling they give me

They won't take you baby away sweetheart... go & get advice from your GP, help yourself get better & be the best mum you can be

Original poster
ashamedofme · 26/07/2007 22:39

my baby is between 1 an 2 yrs (sorry dont want to give myself away) i had my op 8 yrs ago! i dont need them for that now (and havnt done for years) tbh it wasnt that bad at first, i went through stages of taken them when i was stressed ect and then i might not take them again for months. but ive been taking them regular now for about 8 months or so (and i mean going through packets of them) the one's i take now come in packs of 32 and i normally go through a packet every two days so its 16 a day. some days though i take more. god im embarrassed now

OP posts:
CountessDracula · 26/07/2007 22:39

Do the over the counter ones have codeine in them? If so then you cannot go cold turkey, you will have to come off them gradually.

My dad had this problem after a quadruple bypass, they gave him painkillers with codeine in, one day he felt ok and stopped and got really ill, the dr said it was a dependence on codeine. He tailed them off gradually and was fine.

So, the reason the painkillers stop the symptoms is because you are topping up your codeine and you are physically addicted to it. You could try tailing them off on your own or seek your gp's help.

CountessDracula · 26/07/2007 22:45

have found this website which should help too

codeinefreeme

Original poster
ashamedofme · 26/07/2007 22:52

thankyou CD. i didnt realise how common it is, i take propain which does have codeine phosphate and caffeine. i really appreciate all your help ladies.

OP posts:
CountessDracula · 26/07/2007 22:54

No worries

I sometimes have to take a lot of codeine phosphate for crohn's disease, I was warned in advance of the addiction issues so have always been hyper vigilant (as am rather addictive type anyway).

No reason to be ashamed at all! As you say it's very common

Good luck with it, let us know how you get on xx

VeniVidiVickiQV · 26/07/2007 22:57

Dont feel bad

Over the counter painkillers can be very addictive - even paracetamol in some respects (because frequent use can cause headaches which make you take even more).

I have to limit how much co-dydramol I have too for the same reason.

I hope you manage to sort yourself out.

Pruners · 26/07/2007 23:00

Message withdrawn

Kayran · 27/07/2007 10:19

I am so glad you have had a number of really positive responses. I think you might be feeling low and I guess the gp is the way forward there. I know all about having little 'stashes' and I am not sure what I would do now without my tablets. we are in the forces (well DH is) and I move a lot. I always have to go to the gp and explain about the repeat prescription and they all give it (7 doctors in 5 years). I think we worry more than they do. Recently they gave me another drug and I have found by taking the two together i do not get the sleepy feeling but that in itself is a problem as now i am inclined to take the second tablet when i don't really need it! I do find that i am really weepy and emotional on the tablets (although this is not suppossed to be a side effect.) The only thing you can do is try and keep those mini deadlines moving. Also I found that i have put on weight and i want to lose some so i am cutting back, are you in the same boat? Perhaps we can all talk ourselves through the ups and downs!! By the way if you do go cold turkey stomach cramps followed by diaraoeah (but this too will pass LOL) is common

AlbusPercivalWulfricBrianSun · 27/07/2007 10:25

I also found myself addicted to painkillers (Syndol in my case) as I took painkillers that my mum had when she was dying and then suffered from migraines so looked for something really strong that would send me to sleep. TBH I don't know how I weaned myself off them, but I literally just stopped buying them apart from when I genuinely needed them and then the regular want of them disappeared. Not sure I'm making sense but just wanted to let you know that it can be done.

Original poster
ashamedofme · 27/07/2007 10:37

thank you all you have been so kind (i really thought id be called selfish and what not)

Kayran. god i have put on 4 stone and have an irritable bowel since ive taken them regular. its so good to know there is more like me im a normal person who works hard ive not had a bad life ect, not the type i thought would get myself in this mess! just shows how appearances can be deceptive. nobody knows my problem and thats exactly how i know i have one. i take my tablets secretly and i go from chemist to chemist to get them. the cramps hurt so much and the general unwell feeling when i dont take them is awful. i too get tearful when i take them. did you read the link CD left? she is so good with her advice (shes helped me before with other stuff under my real name!) hoe long have you been taking them and do you think its because you have depression? im not so sure.

OP posts:
Kayran · 27/07/2007 11:17

Hmm i am not sure I am depressed although 'situationally unhappy' certainly springs to mind. To cut a long story short had a lot of 'womens' problems and have had five years of IVF. Each preganncy (5) has resulted in emergency surgery and I have one child (nearly 4) who is a survivor of twins. The last surgery was December last year when I was told I was pathologically unlucky! Coupled with hubby being away a lot, being a compulsive (but not brilliant..) mother (will NOT allow anyone else to lok after her - although am moving forward there and she starts pre-school in September) ,my whole sense of self is in the the doldrums. The tablets made long lonely days not so long (hmm) I am now about to join the gym and am going to try and find Slimming World. I think I am getting ready to break out of my cocoon. Unfortuantely I have no support; ie my hubby with the gym said we would have to sit down and discuss it and work out whether it was a good idea. Usually I would just say, oh forget it, but this time I ploughed on. No real joy though as obvioulsy it is a battle won rather than an endeavour endorsed. The tablets are my little comfort blanket but I am hoping to fill the void. And actually I have never admitted to others that I am addicted so YOU have really helped me on the first step of my journey.. SO young lady what do we do about you.......??

Original poster
ashamedofme · 27/07/2007 12:01

god its feels really wierd that im helping someone.

i dont know what to do tbh. a gym sounds good as it might take my mind off things. i havn't taken any today yet so thats good for me. one day at a time i suppose. i wont leave it though i might still go to GP im just scared witless she will report me or something.

OP posts:
CountessDracula · 27/07/2007 13:24

good for you
But don't stop immediately

How about a plan to reduce your use

So how many do you take in a day at the moment? 16 a day I think you said

So today try 15, then 14, then 13. Space them out evenly over the day, don't take them when you feel you need then iyswim, then you get out of the habit of fulfilling a need but your body won't freak out at you stopping.

Bear in mind I am NOT medically qualified and this advice may be shite, I am only basing it on my opinion!

If you don't feel you can go to your gp, could you find a confidential/anonymous helpline to talk to someone about the best way of getting off them?

CountessDracula · 27/07/2007 13:29

Also did you know that codeine makes you massively constipated (which is why I take for crohn's) so that is prob why you have IBS symptoms and weight gain.

I'm sure you are aware of this but just in case you aren't, codeine is an opiate, like heroin. That is why it is hard to come off.

allgonebellyup · 27/07/2007 13:30

God, 16 or more a day sounds like a lot to me!
please see your GP asap before you do yourself some damage!

CountessDracula · 27/07/2007 13:31

There are some GPs on Mumsnet I believe. Maybe one of them could tell you what the protocol is, I'm sure they wouldn't take your baby away but if you are scared of that and that is stopping you from going to the GP then maybe you could find out

Actually my sister is a gp
I will call her and ask

CountessDracula · 27/07/2007 13:33

ah
she is away for 2 weeks
no good

Original poster
ashamedofme · 27/07/2007 13:40

thankyou CD. ive been really good today and havn't taken any yet. i will take two in an hour or so (i think its best to take them before the symptoms kick in) and i will go from there. the link you posted shocked me. i really didnt think its something thats taken seriously.

i would be interested in what a GP on here thinks if you come across one.

you really are all great xx

OP posts:
Swipe left for the next trending thread