It's not summer yet, but we are on cancer support thread 69. Join us if you've got cancer or are having cancer-related tests.

[WhatWouldLeslieKnopeDo]

Good evening lacies and welcome to another thread. We filled the previous one rather quickly with dog stories

Hello to any new posters. Feel free to join us if you've got any sort of cancer, or if you're waiting to find out if you have it. We are always happy to share our experience and hold hands, and even happier when we get to wave goodbye to people who have had the all clear :) (please do come back and let us know either way - sometimes people just disappear into the sunset, leaving us wondering whether they were OK or not!)

It's helpful if you can post a quick (re)introduction, even if you're a regular on the thread, to save people having to remember or to refer back to previous threads. There's no need to "catch up" - just join in whenever you want to.

Hi diane and welcome - although I hope your stay with us is a brief one ☺️ I had breast cancer, although it didn’t present with a dimple... there’s probably not much any of us can tell you except it’s good that you have a hosp appt soon, and in most people’s experience here the breast clinics are usually very thorough, efficient and well oiled machines... As pp have said, the waiting is the worst bit... if you do get bad news, you will very quickly have a plan, which is way better than not knowing what you’re facing!

Hugs and much love to Leslie - I’m so glad you have had some time with your sister, and nice visitors ☺️

Waves to everyone!!

@WhatWouldLeslieKnopeDo please forgive me but I have been reading this thread since I was diagnosed with breast cancer last summer. I really didn't feel that I could join in as I only had surgery and radiotherapy. No chemo made me feel a bit of a fraud but I was still very frightened. I just want to let you know that you and the others on here with your quiet counsel have made such a difference to my life. My poor DH and a couple of friends were the only people I told as I felt I couldn't deal with the emotional fallout from my children ,parents and other close relatives. I'm so terribly sorry that you are having to go through this shit but sending love and hugs and hope for a safe and gentle journey for you. It is completely impossible to explain my gratitude or adequately express my thanks to you.

TightWad I think a lot of people who don't have chemo feel that. But it's a bit nuts. The scary bit is the waiting, the fear, the what ifs. I don't think that ever leaves you to be honest. So there is definitely space for you here.

@Namechange, thank you, you are all so lovely but I just didn't feel worthy of a place here. I feel that I got off so lightly compared to you all but it has certainly been a headf* as I'm sure you will understand.My main reason for putting in an appearance was because I wanted to say thank you to you all for just being here. I'm sure there are far more people like me who are using this thread as a kind of virtual solidarity!
I hope I am out the other side now and just need to keep taking the anastrazole with my fingers crossed.

Really glad to hear it's all gone so well tightwad and it sounds like your husband and friends were brilliant

@Namechange thank you for being so sweet. Yes DH was great although he struggled to deal with the emotional wreck that I became. Who knew that a normally strong, capable and intelligent woman could be rendered entirely useless by stupid cancer? Friends were great too but it was this thread that got me through the long sleepless nights.....
thanks ladies.

Hello all.
Just nipping in to send you all good vibes and hugs if required.

Leslie It's lovely to hear that you have spent some time with your sister. You have previously said how important she is to you I hope that your breathing is back under control.

BOF Sorry to hear about your dad, but Congratulations on your wedding. The tie sounds like it was a fabulous idea

@WhatWouldLeslieKnopeDo thank you 💐

Ditto huge thanks to you all. I read this thread every day as a Mum whose 33 year old daughter has been diagnosed with secondary breast cancer. I don’t know what day of the week it is half the time,but reading your posts helps me.
I really admire your inner strength and dignity in coping with this bitch that is cancer.

to you, Leslie. Your kindness, love and courage shine through the thread.

(You don't 'know' me, but I am an occasional knitter of squares

...)

I just want to say that I'm in awe of your courage and positivity. I had cancer but feel very, very lucky to have been given the all clear two years ago, please don't take this as a stealth boast, I still live with the fear that one day it could creep back-cancer casts a very long shadow and I don't know how all you lovely people cope with an ongoing cancer. I just wanted to say that it's not always an ongoing thing for all the people who are still waiting for a prognosis, sometimes you can be cured and get back to life as you knew it.

For all of you who are still under going treatment, I wish you all peace and strength and hope one day you will have a happy outcome. Unmumsnetty hugs to you all x

user not a stealth boast! We love to hear happy endings, and I hope you stay healthy and well away from hospitals!

Aw Diane you will get days like this, be kind to yourself. Hopefully you won't need to be here long but we're here for you as long as you need us

Leslie I hope you manage to get another visit with your sister soon

Dolly sorry to hear about your daughter, I think it must be harder for our loved ones than us at times. Is there anything that helps as a mother whose daughter has cancer? I'm worried about my mam worrying about me, I'm 35 with terminal cancer and although she puts a brave face on I can tell she's terrified and I don't know what to do or say to make her feel any better

User it's certainly not a stealth boast! We're always pleased for people when the treatment does work

Is there anything that helps as a mother whose daughter has cancer? I'm worried about my mam worrying about me

Seconded this. My mum is the person I'm most worried about leaving behind. She tries to stay positive but I can see what a toll this is all taking on her.

Just popping in to wave to everyone and in particular Leslie and purple!

Hope everyone is doing ok - I'm actually waiting to hear from a counsellor and thinking of having some acupuncture for anxiety and insomnia. Has anyone tried this at all? I am exhausted and struggling with life generally but resisting giving up work for now and hoping it will pass!

Hi addled lovely to hear from you. I've not tried acupuncture but I'd love to hear your review. Anything for some bloody sleep!

Helloo!
Yes apparently it is proven to be helpful for people with insomnia associated with cancer and cancer treatment... someone was telling me there are some places with special 'cancer rates' (that's my name for them!) so may be worth checking out locally??

Namechange and Purple- I know my daughter is worried about me and her Dad. Since she was first diagnosed four years ago, life has never been the same and we lived with the fear of her cancer coming back and I worried about how I would cope.But life went on and we coped and we’re muddling through now. Our daughter doesn’t live locally so my husband and I take it in turns to go up each week to look after her,take her to chemo, do lots of housework( well,I do...)
Her prognosis isn’t good and I would give anything for it to be me,but all we can do is reassure her that we’ll be ok. Cancer has become a way of life for us I guess and you learn to live with it.
So try not to worry about your Mums ladies, we all learn to cope in our own way and we will be ok. X

Thank you dolly I think that's where we are at the moment too. I'm 35 (just realised that genuinely thought I was still 34 ) and my mum's oldest. We've always been so close. She does help a lot with practical stuff, but like you is a long way away. Maybe if I stopped worrying about her for a few days and she stopped worrying about me we could have a break

Hi addled I had acupuncture to help me with the head fry of initial diagnosis and subsequent wait for scan results etc. I found it helpful... he incorporated counselling and visualising techniques too. I would definitely recommend.. cant re.ember where you live... but if it is London PM me and I will give you his details.

Hello to everyone else... gentle hugs for all...
And Leslie.. you're in my thoughts...every day.

Stern words must be said here

Tightwad you've had CANCER! I'm sorry you felt you weren't 'worthy' - if you're not, who is?
You said Who knew that a normally strong, capable and intelligent woman could be rendered entirely useless by stupid cancer? We know.

User that's the funniest stealth boast I've read.... We all wish everyone would get better and go away - and often that does happen of course. It gives me (and everyone else too) ENORMOUS pleasure to wave goodbye to people who have had successful treatment.

TQ such a lovely post, WELL SAID!!

‘I really didn't feel that I could join in as I only had surgery and radiotherapy. No chemo made me feel a bit of a fraud’

TightWad I get exactly what you mean, but TQ is right. It’s a phenomenon quite often talked about icw blood cancers. We are rather different - no operations, radiotherapy rarely used, chemo regimes can be quite different. I have an incurable cancer (well you can attempt the only cure which is bone marrow transplant, a procedure which carries the risk of death and isn’t indicated if you’re stable/normal on meds)

Because my meds are cytotoxic and can have serious side effects - but fortunately I’ve settled down with them well - but it’s not quite chemo in the classic sense.

So yes, sometimes it does feel as if I’m not a ‘real’ cancer patient. Even though I’m on a testing cycle that means scanxiety every three months and the worry that the drugs have stopped working resurfaces every time.

But I’ve been welcomed here (even when I’m being vigorous) and really appreciate people who just ‘get it’ (I’m posting this in case there are any further lurkers wondering whether to post or not)

And of course, if what they say about more people surviving in future, and cancer being beaten back into a long-term liveable with condition, then there might be rather more people in the same boat as me

Hows everyone doing? I went to see consultant regarding my symptoms and he agree to a colonoscopy although he said he thought my symptoms were innocent i know the only way to know for sure is the colonoscopy. Waiting for appointment to come through the post.

In other news my mum started on a trial this morning at the royal marsden, they are hopefully it will be sucessful x