Cancer support thread 63 for a handhold or advice and anything in between

[purpleunicorns]

Continuation of the lovely Leslie's thread here as it was nearly full

If you're worried about symptoms, waiting for test results or just need a safe place to vent then pull up a seat, we're a friendly bunch and we don't bite too much

There's quite a variety of cancers on this thread so hopefully one of us will have some advice and hopefully you don't need to stay for long.

I'll start with my story:
Diagnosed with stage 2b cervical cancer in October 2017, 25 lots of radiotherapy, 4 internal radiotherapy and 5 lots of chemo. Was told last week that it's spread and is incurable, palliative chemo starts on 16th July

Thank you for all the further messages... some of you have so much to deal with at the moment, but have been very kind. I virtually gave up Mumsnet because I was so fed up of reading threads where it just seems to be people attacking each other and being keyboard warriors / trolls... so to find you all so supportive of each other is truly lovely.

I'm feeling calm and pragmatic today (although that can change very quickly!) I'm still trying to think along the lines of IF it's a bad result, then better it's found, it's already there anyway and they are only there to help me. It feels like such a long wait. I visited my elderly parents today and my Dad, never one to see a glass half full, sat and looked at me constantly with a very concerned face!!

Thank you all... it's nice to know you are here!

TQ definitely send it to PIP cos once they have done your Pip claim UC has to put you in the support group.

It's a frustrating system - makes me want to bang my head on the desk frequently. Some staff are not used to dealing with non job seekers at all

Hello, I'd like to pull up a chair and hang around here for a bit if that's ok? Saw my GP today with a lump in my left breast, he's referring me to the breast clinic. He said that the lump doesn't feel like a cyst and the fact that it isn't painful and how it feels leads him to believe I'm likely to get bad news. Much as that was a shock, I appreciate his honesty. He was so kind.

I'm having to cancel the holiday that we were due to go on next week, so I've had to explain to the dc's that I need to be seen at hospital as soon as possible so that means we can't go away. The eldest is a teenager and understands the implications but the younger one is 8 and is just a bit bemused. DH is doing his best to be stoic but it's obvious he's shocked.

Obviously nothing is confirmed so I'm just in that hideous place of having to wait and see.

Hello Bravo pull up a seat and make yourself comfortable hopefully you won't be here for long

I had a lump that wasn't painful and it turned out to be nothing. Keep in mind that 9 out of 10 lumps are completely harmless and they can't tell from just a feel and even if it it is cancer it's soo treatable now

There's a few ladies on here with breast cancer so feel free to ask any questions or just have a rant if you need too

Do you have to cancel your holiday Bravo? I saw my GP for lumps the week before holiday and they just wrote down when I was away - not that it mattered as I’m still waiting nearly 4 weeks later 🙄

Can I ask for the ladies who have had breast US for lumps - do they scan the whole breast or just concerned area? My last scan was 3 years ago and I can’t remember at all. It’s just as I have lumps ranging in sizes pretty much the span of both breasts - while I know this is a ‘good’ sign I’m a bit paranoid they’ll not look at them all, and it only takes one to be sinister.

Not that I’ve been over thinking things while they keep me waiting...

@PenApple I saw a walk in breast clinic so mammogram of both breast, ultrasound of both and then I needed biopsies. None of it was awful. Biopsies uncomfortable but fine and done under local. I (fingers crossed) only have the one lump.
@BravoOscarOscarBravo my 7 year old has lots of questions and we've had to cancel a holiday. We've just told her and her brother (4) that it's postponed and we'll go once mummy has had her medicine from the hospital. I think the worse bit so far was waiting for results and worrying about telling the kids.

Thanks ranout, I guess I’ll just voice my concerns to consultant or ultrasound technician. I’m just presuming I won’t be offered a mammogram with being (just) under 35, tissue too dense I think?

I’ve decided when the appointment does come through I’m just going to go alone, I’ll be less emotional that way and I’m going with my positive hat on!

Morning everyone!

Welcome Bravo ,** sorry you've had to join us. Hopefully it'll only be temporary, & it'll be a benign nuisance.

I had a couple of name-change fails upthread which MNHQ has kindly corrected for me. Sorry for confusion!

I've got a MacMillan massage booked for tomorrow morning which I'm really looking forward to. The extras they provide really do make a difference, I think. I know other people have found them a bit meh, but I seem to be really lucky with my local centre.

Hello Penapple. When I went I had a mammogram and a scan but I am a bit older than you. They scanned the whole breast then concentrated on the actual lump to get the biopsy.

Hello Bravo. I am being treated for BC and happy to answer any questions .

Miles I gave a macmillan massage booked for tomorrow too. Am having reflexology. I got referred when I was feeling very stressed but am not too bad now which makes me wonder if I should cancel it .

Am going camping in a family festival on Friday after my treatment. Its looking like the only 2 nights I will get away this summer. My sister is taking DD on Wednesday. Luckily I won't have to put the tent up. Its in Wales and the weather for Saturday and Sunday looks pretty bad. Just my luck eh!

Pen I'm 34 I they gave me a mammogram when I had a lump, they did an US just around where I had a lump, they didn't do the whole breast but they did mammogram them both

Cheers chase & purple, guess it maybe depends on the trust re age but I’ll trust they’ll do what they feel necessary.

I’m not posting too much as feel a bit like an intruder when I haven’t even had tests yet, so all hypothetical. I’ll keep checking in and update when I have my appointment 😊

Sorry folks, I need to vent.
My lumpectomy has been changed from 16th August to 17th August. I know it's only 1 day but it didn't occur to me that the date would be changed
I was diagnosed on 20th July and just want to get started on my treatment FFS.

Ah Minnie that's rubbish, have they said why they've changed it? I know it doesn't stop you worrying but another day won't make the slightest bit of difference in terms of how well the treatment works.
Could you spend the extra day having a bit of a pamper? Go for a massage/get your hair done and just generally spoil yourself a bit?

Hope you enjoy your massages Miles and Chase they have a massage room where I go for my chemo but the girl who does it is far too chatty so I keep declining

Cases more urgent than mine purpleunicorn. Thank you for reassuring me.
At least work will be pleased. We're short staffed.
I'll have a nice lunch and an extra swim.

Hi all, hope you're doing as well as possible. Do you have any advice on coping with summer holiday guilt? I'm on chemo and am pretty worn out, spending a lot of time in bed. DDs are 14 & 10, so old enough to entertain themselves mostly but I feel so guilty that I'm not spending more time with them, doing exciting things etc. Hopefully it will be different next summer hols, but how do you cope with constantly letting kids down?

Hi Foldy mines 16 so a bit more independent than yours. For me it's the cinema where I can sleep if needed or just sit and relax for 2 hours or just giving him some money to go into town with his friends. He doesn't say no to the odd takeaway either which saves the hassle of cooking, or a BBQ if you have someone who can give you a hand with it? Luckily mine has a girlfriend and spends most of his time at her house.
Do you have many more chemos to go?

@FoldyRoll hello, I haven't started chemo yet mine are 7 and 4 and I must say I'm feeling guilty already. We've cancelled our first foreign holiday which needed to be done.
I must say the first thing people have offered me is the have the kids so once chemo kicks in. I am going to take them up on it! I'm sure my kids will have a better time with their mates than with me!
Has anyone offered to have yours for you?
You've probably already done this but mine are craft mad. Today they've both started a peg rug! Are there any projects they can get on with, with minimal supervision?

Hi all, not posting for myself, but my mum.

Found out she has lung cancer 2 weeks ago today. That's all we know so far. She had a CT guided biopsy done last week, PET scan on Friday, loads of blood tests, a scan on her kidneys (not sure why this has been thrown into the mix tbh with you). She has a lung function/breathing test on Thursday morning.

We see the Consultant again on Monday to discuss the results of all the tests, and to discuss treatment options.

Trying to feel optimistic for her, but can't get rid of the big worry lurking around. Suppose we just have to wait and see what's what now.
xx

Hi all,I'm gonna link to my thread as I cannot type it all out again.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/3324995-AIBU-to-be-angry-at-the-nhs-cancer-service

Long story short-lump found in January was ignored and fobbed off by many health care professionals.

Diagnosis: Grade 3 invasive ducatal breast cancer with inflammatory presentation.

I've had to fight constantly and I'm so tired already. Despite all the NICE guidelines and the hospital own policies they weren't offering me the tests and appointments within their supposed time slots.

I threatened to go to the papers and get my solicitor involved and all of a sudden there is a ct scan,bone scan and ultrasound this Friday. Mri to be arranged.

Hello Stressed So sorry to hear about your mum. I think you will find more support on this thread, which is for those supporting relatives with cancer and other life-limiting diseases. All of us on this thread have cancer ourselves so we look at things from a different perspective. Best wishes to both of you

Hi Pandora, glad you came over to this thread but I'm so angry for you after having to go this long without a diagnosis and treatment!

I'm so glad they're finally starting to take this seriously and you've got appointments for scans.

I've haven't got much advice as mine is cervical but there's quite a few ladies on here now with breast cancer who can answer any questions you have

I've had MRI scans/ultrasounds and CT scans so any questions about those I can help with

Waiting and being in limbo before you start treatment is the worst part (although after all the hassle you've had it probably isn't) and you'll feel much more in control once you have a treatment plan in place and you know exactly how they're going to treat it

Hi Pandora didn't want to read and run. I read your other thread but it was too close to home so didn't comment then.
I'm sorry your going through this and we're all here to listen.
I'm breast cancer just diagnosed on 20 July and this is the worse bit, the waiting. I am lucky though that they took me seriously and seem to be meeting timescales.
Keep pushing

Hello, I’ve been missing as I had a couple of reasonable days so was avoiding the issue.

Had the CT thorax biopsy today with no sedation. Grim grim grim. Now bits of me hurt that I’ve never felt before. Still, on the plus side it’s done now and hopefully I can crack in with treatment in due course.

I’ve had my pity party this afternoon so now I’m going to pick myself up and carry on, as you do

At least that bits over and done with and you're a step closer to getting rid of it Tsonly. I'm surprise you had no sedation for it though, i think you're braver than I would be! Did they say how long until results/or treatment starts?

Thanks Purple thank god it's over. Urgh.

It was first thing this morning and was marked as being needed for the next MDT meeting on Friday so fingers crossed.