**Tamoxigang 53** Roll up, roll up... Anyone with any cancer (or test-waiting) welcome!

[MarthaCostello]

Good evening all,

The old thread had nearly run out when I posted so I have taken the liberty of starting a new one before it fills up completely.

I hope the title is OK - there isn't actually that much room, I was trying to fit in that people should come along even if they haven't been diagnosed yet.

If you're new here welcome to the Tamoxigang thread. This is a great place for anyone with any type of cancer (it originally started out as those taking Tamoxifen for breast cancer, hence the name, but has expanded). Please introduce yourself and make yourself comfortable! You're more than welcome here if you haven't been diagnosed yet too, sometimes people find it helpful to talk through their fears whilst waiting for results. And we will hold your hand until you find out, and hopefully wave you on your way with an all-clear :)

There is almost always someone around to chat, or to answer any questions. Nothing is off-limits here. This is somewhere to offload any fears and frustrations, in a safe place where someone will have been there before.

I hope everyone has been enjoying the gorgeous summery weather

Bum and buggeration mysillydig
I'm a lurker on here, having had four lumpectomies in the past and 'boobs like bags of marbles' to quote my GP, so I have a tiny bit of understanding how it feels.
It's so good to know there's support on a thread like this one.

so sorry mysillydog..... Didn't preview spelling

Welcome iwouldgoouttonight, but sorry you've had to join us. Of course you are welcome here :) we are open to people with any kind of cancer (or being tested for it). I'm a bit of an odd one out here too, as I had bowel cancer. There's a few of us about with different cancers. I hope you get good results, but sorry you have to wait so long

Mysillydog I'm sorry it wasn't better news, and same for you PerfidiousPanda. There's still a chance of your GP being wrong.

But if not, you will both get through it. I know that sounds a bit trite and useless. It can be so overwhelming at the beginning. But many, many of us here have been through it and will be here to hold hands and answer any questions you might have.

Breast cancer is highly treatable. The treatment is not fun. But you have a very good chance of living a long and healthy life following treatment. The chances get better all the time with new treatments appearing.

So many people have passed through the Tamoxigang now. Some of us still lurk about to try and offer some support to newbies, but many more are out there just getting on with their lives.

Life will never be exactly the same, but you will eventually find a "new normal".

Panda that's good news about seeing a different psychiatrist, I hope he or she will be better than the last one! In the meantime, please vent here all you need to, and do consider the helplines I posted before if you need to.

Hi P1nkP0ppy :)

Waving to everyone else!

Mysillydog, That's not the best news you needed before Christmas. I too have positive lymph nodes so will be having a full node clearance as well so you are not alone. Chemo is not exactly something to look forward to but it is doable and it goes by really quicky. Sending positive thoughts for you your way

Mysillydog, I'm sorry you didn't get better news today. It is such a lot to take in and certainly normal to expect you are due for some good news. It still feels very unreal to me 18 months on. But it is very treatable now so although you are going to have to go through more treatment there is life at the other end.

Panda, it sounds like you have a very supportive GP, it really helps to deal with this if you can trust your team. Fingers crossed that she is wrong however, but at least she has been honest with you . Not too much longer to wIt now.

Good morning all.mysillydog i am so sorry, but as those before me said, it will settle down and you will wake up one day to find the treatment is over. I had full axillary clearance and had to have chemo which I am almost done with. None of it is easy, but it is very doable. None of us chose for this to happen to us, but there us so much inspiration around us and hopefully we will all look back at these times a good many years ahead and find it in iur hearts to support others.
Wishing you all a restful and lovely weekend.

Hello all, I just wanted to pop in and send support to all waiting for treatment and results and going through all the yukky.
I've been feeling low - I'm finding chemo hard - and haven't wanted to post while glum, but I think of everyone here every day and send all my best for kind, gentle Christmases all round.

Mysillydog sorry to hear your news. But you will get through this, and we will all be here to listen, answer questions and offer moral support 💐 😘

dinster sending you a (((((BIG HUG))))) Chemo is tough, but just keep ticking them off and before you know it the last a Chemo will be done! If you need to come on here and vent do. We all totally understand 😘 xx

I have come to the conclusion my oncologist or hospital, can't make up their minds about what they are doing! I had a call yesterday to tell me they now need to do an MRI scan of the area. Before they do a bone biopsy 😒 They also want to scan my head, just to make sure I have been checked completely!!

I'm fed up with them constantly changing what they are doing, but at the same time hoping that this scan will give them a better picture of the area, and hopefully will answer all their questions, without the need for a bone biopsy! But that may just be wishful thinking! 😔

I suppose the most frustrating thing, is I know this is going to mean, yet more waiting for results 😔

Hope everyone has a nice weekend xxxxx

Nanny, yet more incredible tales of endless testing. I now can't tell if your team are super cautious or not very confident in their own decisions. I have never known anyone take so long to get a decision. Sounds like their heads need scanning. As you say, more waiting and worrying. I'm so sorry. At least if it all comes back clear you will know you've been thoroughly checked but that's not much consolation right now. I hope you're getting plenty of tlc at home.

Dinster, hi and nice to hear from you. Sorry you've been feeling so down, how many more rounds do you have?

I hope everyone else is doing ok and has a good weekend.

Thanks all for the warm welcome. I'm struggling with waiting for just one test result, I can't imagine how hard and frustrating it is to keep having tests and more waiting each time.

Mysillydog so sorry to hear your news wasn't good.

iwouldgoout, and others, please don't think that it's normal for there to be endless tests for just one thing, spread over months and months. Teams sort out what's what very fast these days, because the technology is there to do just that. Especially if there is a chance of spread. Meantime, you are dealing with a cancer that has become very treatable. I'm seeing new drugs appearing for this on a very regular basis in the science reports now, and very good results from many of them. So even if it has done something ruder than being in that bit of skin, a good team will know the answers for most cases now.

Mysillydog, gee, not quite the news you were hoping for, as it's more treatment, eh. But from what we know so far, still very treatable. Hoping they manage the next steps well for you.

Waving to all.

dinster of course chemo is hard. Please dont feel like you have to be okay with it. None of us who undergo chemo are okay with it! I hope you have caring and supportive people around you, but also remember this is the place to come and talk about it. We know what you mean.
nanny i echo what mrssaid. I think the hospital team are unable to make up their minds, but even though it is annoying and is only prolonging your wait, any tests are good in giving that all invaluable info! I just wish that they would talk to you properly!
As i mentioned my chemo is soon to come to an end( they do end eventually!) and although the weekly tax is less severe than the AC regimen, I am far from comfortable or well:( i look like i have aged with the eyebrows and eyelashes all but gone, and my sleep pattern is torturously erratic. We deserve a break ( not medals!) for going through all this, we do! It is so bothersome when people say "you are so strong" or " I could never manage the way you do" because you know they mean well, but you are no superhero and coping is tough enough as it is without people distancing their ability to comprehend your struggle with those words. Oh well! Just wanted to share that. take care all.

royal and mrs I agree at the end of this I will safely be able to say they have checked out every bit of me! But I just wish they would communicate things better.

amber I appreciate that what I am going through is not the norm, and I apologise if coming on here and being honest about what I am going through, is wrong, or upsetting/worrying for others. I wish I was able to say things have been dealt with quickly. But in my case that's not the reality.

I don't know if that's down to it being a busy hospital, or that my Oncologist only works the one day, or if it's just bad luck. But whichever it is it's tough and frustrating. But yes I can agree that it's not the norm so I apologise if sharing my experience has upset anyone. But I think it's important that 'good' and 'bad' experiences are shared. Because the reality is however wonderful the NHS is, it is overstretched and some hospitals are probably struggling more than others.

Morning everyone.

Lovely to hear from you dinster, don't worry about sharing when you are feeling glum, we all feel like that sometimes, chemo is tough and it makes you feel rubbish, but keep ticking them off. I find making sure I have nice things planned to do on the good days, helps me cope better when I feel ill.

nanny, we appreciate your honesty about your treatment, although your team do seem to be particularly disorganised and unavailable compared to other people's experience. I'm sorry that they think you need more tests and waiting- hope you are enjoying being at home with your family.

I'm having my next chemo on the 23rd, so taking my dd to the theatre today to see a show and then out for dinner while I still feel well enough and going to make the most of the next couple of days. I just hope I can get through Christmas day before the Tax truck hits- am anticipating this will be on boxing day

I'm stressing about my annual check up on Monday. My left implant and armpit are aching and I've convinced myself that the muscle above the implant is swollen

I probably wouldn't even be noticing it if it wasn't for the damn appointment.

Marshy good luck for Monday, I hope they can reassure you. If you wouldn't notice it otherwise, hopefully that's a good sign :)

fresta enjoy your day with your daughter today that sounds lovely. Fingers crossed your side effects will hold off until Boxing Day.

amber it is always good to hear about all the progress being made with cancer treatment, thank you :)

dinster sorry you are struggling. You can always post here, however you are feeling :)

Waving to everyone, I hope you are having as good a weekend as possible

Hello,
First time poster on this thread. I'm waiting for my appointment at the breast clinic, which is scheduled for the end of the month. I've been swinging between thinking I'm wasting everyone's time and panicking that they will discover a serious problem.

I've read through this whole thread to everyone. I hope those waiting for tests/results get positive news & thanks to all the lovely posters who offer support and helpful information.

Hello mybrainhurtsalot welcome to the thread and I hope you find your visit is short :)
There will be many conflicting emotions and thoughts in the space of time until your appointmnet, and I know it is hard not to dwell upon the matter, but hopefully the experts will reassure you once you meet them nd have any tests done, and that there will be no cause for concern. Even if there is something, you will find a lovely group of people on here to help you make sense of things, answer your queries and hold your hand. Best of luck!

Marshy Good Luck with your appointment on Monday. 💐🍷xx

mybrainhurtsalot welcome. Let's hope your time here is short, meant in the nicest possible way. We all understand the ups and downs of emotions while waiting for the initial appointment 💐 xx

Thank you royal and nanny. I've found the information on this thread very reassuring.

Looks like a tough week ahead for lots of posters - Marshy, I really hope it goes well, and Nanny I do hope you get some answers soon.

I've just had a different mammogram appointment through so am very confused - the new appt that I sat and waited for until they changed it to the 22nd was 0950 for mammogram then 1010 for consultant. I have had a separate letter this afternoon saying 1310 for mammogram. I tried to call but they are closed. Not sure whether to leave it though - my first letter that they printed out when I was there specifically says 0950 mammogram, so I don't know whether, if I bring it to their attention, they'll try and change everything. Maybe best to leave alone and just turn up at 0950?

Hello mybrainhurtsalot - I often feel I'm wasting people's time too, but everyone is so lovely here and they are incredibly supportive. I hope you are wasting everyone's time, and that there is nothing to worry about at all!

I wrote a very long post earlier and the Internet / mumsnet crashed on me and I lost it all. Probably just as well as it was a bit negative. There's been a lot of cancer in the news this week which I haven't liked very much.

Marshy, I hope your fears are completely unfounded and you get the all clear again.

Nanny, keep posting, your experiences are very distressing and you absolutely need this place to vent.

Leslie, I think you are probably the youngest of us but your posts are always so thoughtful and kind.

Royal, I completely agree with you about the attitude of others. It's just something you have to get through because the survival instinct kicks in and you get on with it. I hate being considered as different. I'm still me.

Mybrainhurts, hello. This is a very stressful time and probably the worst week for it. Keep posting, ask questions, none too silly or insensitive and stay away from Google, it's very out of date.

Hello to everyone else, it's very busy here at the moment but I'm so pleased new people have found us and are finding it helpful.

mrs I too have noticed just how much news abiut cancer there is or is it just that now I have cancer I am more sensitive to anything to do with it? I found the news re the study about most cancers being due to lifestyle/ pollution etc as opposed to an earlier study suggesting cancer is due to bad luck in general quite upsetting. It is like they forget theef are actually people who have cancer when they decide to report these"findings"
marshy hope all is well on your check up.

Welcome to any newbies and, if my posts are confusing , it may be because I have secondary BC and so am trying every chemo in the book.
yesterday i had a blood test, chemo No.5 (Epirubicin) and consultant appointment (interspersed with Christmas shopping and the usual weekly supermarket shop).
Blood test OK - haemoglobin low but no blood transfusion needed this time. Chemo OK. Consultant rather equivocal - he didn't have tumour markers from yesterday's test but the results up to the last ones showed that chemo was only having a limited effect.
So, next options are for different chemo: Taxol, Vinelrubiin (?) and Carboplatin (first time that anyone has ever given me platinum!) Then if all established drugs fail he will put me on trials for experimental drugs ... There are several looking hopeful and my local hospital is heavily involved at top end of cancer research (and gene therapies).
Best news of week: DS has got a proper graduate job starting in January, in London. He's excited and is also thinking of further qualifications - either an MBA or an even more specialist MSc. Hoping it all works out for him as it has been a hard road academically and the leukaemia diagnosis when he was a student didn't help (but he is fine now thanks to the amazing development of Imatinib/Glivec).
So Christmas presents are now sorted, most food is on order and we have to pack up and get to our rented cottage on Tuesday for a lazy Christmas.

Hi Lily. Firstly, well done to your DS, that's really fab and a lazy cottage Christmas sounds very relaxing, I hope you all enjoy it. But grr and sorry that the current chemo is not having the desired effect. Bloody cancer I'm glad your oncologist has some other ideas, he sounds like he is on the ball. Will you be switching to the new chemo for your next round?

mrsrhod that is awfully kind of you to say, thank you. I do my best. This thread was an absolute lifeline when I had my treatment, but I don't really have much to offer in return as nearly everyone has breast cancer questions. But I lurk endlessly in the hope someone will ask something I can answer!

I hope everyone is having a fun Saturday night, whatever you're up to my nerve pain is playing up so I'm lazing about reading AIBU threads (definitely recommended as a distraction from feeling rough or worrying about results!)