How do you know if you're wasting Dr's time?

[Pyrrhagena]

Have a doctors appointment tomorrow (smear, can't get out of it, I've already cancelled once) and there's something I'm not sure if I should mention or not. How do you know if it's something you should ask about or if it something that means they will think you are crazy and paranoid?

Mention everything.
I sometimes have a list in my pocket to make sure I havent forgotten something.

Why do they put their hands on you?

Do you mean they put their hands on you to examine you? In which case, they have to in some circumstances.

It sounds like you had a bad experience and that's affected how you view GPs now. I assume you aren't in the UK if you're paying.

You can see a different GP if you aren't happy.

I know, I know, I know, I'm just being ridiculous. But I hate it when anyone touches me. Sometimes I even feel suffocated when the DC are in cuddle mode. I'm well aware that this makes me a bad mummy and I do try very hard not to let them know.

And obviously I know they have to put their hands on you sometimes to examine you, it's more the not knowing that unnerves me. Obviously for a smear test you know what is going to happen, but at the GP you can never tell. It's too illogical (as it seems to me), last time I went with a cough she just lifted my shirt and listened with the stethoscope. The time (years) before when I went to the doctor for a cough i had to strip to my underwear and cough whilst he had his hand down my pants. I went once to the doctor with infected insect bites, he didn't want to see them just told me it was acne and prescribed anti-acne medication. (Yes, I did end up with blood poisoning). It just seems like everyone knows how and when to go to the doctor and what to say and I don't. I hate having to talk about anything personal and there they sit and watch you and ask questions. It is like an exam!

Never see the one who had his hand down your pants again!

Make sure you have it down on your notes that you have contact issues and they need to explicitly warn you before they touch you. Any time I've been to the doctors they always have anyway!

Like others have said. Write it down and pass them a note if you find it too difficult to speak about your symptoms.

I've worked out who listens and who doesnt now in my surgery once i was told, why had i gone, when i went to ask about if smear would interact with coil. but it was that bloody dr who sent me the letter about the smear. I thought how bloody rude.

I usually write a list, then write a list of relevant information against each item, to remind me in the surgery.

It does not always work out, although it was very useful when I saw a gynae who was too quick for me to think things through properly last year.

I have a lot of doctors at my surgery, and do not go back to them if I am not happy with them. The one I prefer to see is a bit brusque, but I now know what to expect after 20years, so can work with that.

If it does not work out, I now see another. It is a bit annoying and I can see that it is so much worse when you are paying.

Good luck with your appt.

I survived! Will update later. He says I have a terratome (?)

Glad it went well today

Well done!

Ok, glad you went :)
It's called a teratoma. So you had a scan?

Thanks kia have done some googling and wish I hadn't!

I went in and (fortunately DC2 came in with me) he asked if all had been well the past year. So I automatically said yes. Then thought that maybe I should have said no and said about the pain and bleeding. By which time he was saying that as it was a few years since I'd had the tumour removed that he wanted to do a scan. So I thought there was no point saying anything. And then I thought I'd have to admit here that I hadn't so I did tell him. He didn't seem to think it was anything to be worried about, as it wasn't heavy bleeding. But I should make a note if it happens again as I have no idea when it happens in my cycle, but probably ovulation. He did the scan and started looking more and more serious... There is some kind of teratoma on one side, don't read if you're squeamish...containing probably bones and teeth material. He said to monitor it and come back in a year, then changed that to 6 months and by the end of the appointment had decided 4 months! He did say I would have to have it removed if it changes/grows.

Now I just have to decide whether or not to tell DH or wait until after 4 months to see what happens.

Did you tell him about the bleeding and pain OP or not?
Of course you must tell DH! Wouldn't you want to know if it was him?

Tell him.

Well done for telling him, you did the right thing. Glad they are going to keep an eye on it too, that's reassuring.

Telling the doctor I mean, it helps them to have all the facts. I'd tell your DH too, it might be less stressful for you if he knows now.

You mean a dermoid cyst, yes? They can be removed, don't worry yourself! It is more frequent than you think. Not nice but it is treatable.

Yes, according to Wikipedia a dermoid cyst is a cystic teratoma. And now I have read far too much about it! English is my doctors fourth language (and he is almost fluent so it may not be the term usually used. He learnt his English in the us)

Of course I'd want to know if something was wrong with DH. But he gets pissed off if I am ill (does this count as being ill?) and is very stressed at work at the moment. He didn't ask about my appointment so I didn't say anything yet. I was wondering if I should just wait until I have the next check up and tell him then if something needs doing.

Errrrmmm, that's not normal. Him getting pissed off because you are ill I mean. He's meant to be there for you.

Yes, but he's really stressed at work at the moment and I'm not sure if it's worth bothering him about it. If it's nothing to worry about then it isn't serious is it? It's not fair to tell him if he's only going to worry when he has other, more important things to think about.

Yes tell him. If you ever needed emergency treatment for something like stomach pains someone woukd need to know your full medical history to explain to the medics.

My friend has one of those DH's who is always stressed with work and doesn't tak her illness seriously. She was hardly able to walk recently and he still buggered off to work. Her sister had to ring th out of hours GP and her Dad come round to get her a drink and put the Washing out as her 2 teenage girls (one nearly 18), wouldn't. They appear to follow their Father's lead. Definitely a behaviour to nip in the bud now.

You're his wife and an equal partner in your marriage. If you get to know he's stressed at work, he gets to know about your health problems.

What can be more important than your wife's health??

His and his sleep. And if he gets too stressed then he doesn't sleep.

So you are going to tell him, but it is just a matter of timing?

I haven't told him yet. The boss is visiting today so I didn't want to upset his sleep. I'm not sure if I should tell him during the week ( if it stresses him and gives him too much to think about then he won't sleep well and so will be angry that I'm causing him to go to work on little sleep) or the weekend (if he doesn't sleep it ruins his weekend because he has no chance to recover from the week).