Back Again! Back Pain Support Thread

[PavlovtheCat]

Only right I start the new one seeing as I was responsible for the last one ending so abruptly !

This is a support thread for people with back pain (that does not even cover the description of hell that back pain causes). It's for all types of back pain, for long term posters with chronic pain (including those on the upwards journey to recover), short term advice through tough acute episodes and all the in betweens.

We moan, winge, share successes, guide each other and hand hold through the maize of a million medical routes and options, treatments, investigations. We internet shop as a form of pain relief, drink wine, take strong painkillers, eat cake and we go through lots of heat packs!

We don't always have the answers but we do have a lot to say about it all

Here are the links to our previous threads:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/general_health/1871592-The-Back-Story
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/general_health/1992406-The-Back-Story-Continues
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/general_health/2023274-More-Terrible-Back-Stories

I have a sacroiliac belt, it gives a bit of a supportive feeling, helps me walk faster, perhaps I need it now as I'm stiff. I also use it to hold my wheat bag in place. A pain to keep putting on and off to go to the loo though.

Patch change over day. It's definitely keeping the pain at a lower level but it's what I guess is termed breakthrough pain which I'm suffering with. I read an article saying breakthrough pain should be changed to activity pain as it's usually caused by over doing it. If that is true then it's no surprise as I'm over doing it every day simply looking after the kids and house. I just can't not do the stuff I shouldn't do. I'm also feeling very unsupported and alone, still waiting for the appointment. Maybe I'll call the hospital again to see if there is news. I don't find friends and family understand, so sympathy and support is pretty limited. I think this contact is much more helpful in knowing you aren't alone and there are people who understand rather than judge you for what you are or aren't doing and what drugs you are taking.

As for travel, I'm like others in just going for it. I haven't gone home often but that's partly because travelling with small people is hard and the available accommodation isn't very hospitable so a mix of other stuff too. During pregnancy I used a couple of rolled up towels in the car - one under my bum to raise me up so my knees weren't higher than my hips and another in the middle of my back. The car seat position isn't good at all and I was partly doing it to avoid another back to back birth. We went away in Jan to the canaries and that was tough as I was suffering full on spasms. I took the self heating pads, lots of drugs and listened to a mindfulness meditation audio - not the specific health one but it did help I should try it more as I'm feeling very low right now anyway.

GP soon, got to get DD1 early from nursery, haven't checked her lymph node is week but presume it's still there, well swollen. I'm going to discuss the breakthrough pain and referral, plus whether I can see a physio in the meantime - answer very likely will be NO! Maybe I'll get some diazepam instead.

Hope everyone is having a lovely and low pain day.

Queen I think you are at the peak of awfulness with young children and chronic back pain. Sorry that's not particularly helpful but I have found I have coped better since my two became more self reliant / don't need or expect lifting. I really really really struggled when they were both small (now 4 and 7) and it is easier now. All I can suggest is some television won't hurt them. A messy house never killed anyone. DD is heading for all level three at year 2 end and she watched far far too much tv at times as it was the only way I could cope. You have my absolute sympathy. We can only do our best.

also good luck with gp and hope dd feels better soon

oh and pavlov I've developed a huge frank habit :)

I guessed right and got some diazepam )and stocked up on patches and cocodamol). Apparently baclofen causes depression to worsen. Oh well, another lecture from the pharmacy about diazepam, I'll probably send DH as I have a friend coming to stay tonight.

Yes the TV and the iPad often too are in use. It makes me hide in another room but luckily we are in a two bed flat so always close by if needed. One of the silver linings to our sale failing through so not buying the four bed detached with garage :(

My four year old is easier in the physical sense than the two year old but the eldest is very highly strung and much more likely to make a big mess, she's getting better at tidying up when instructed to. It's hard trying not to feel some resentment at having to deal with their full on behaviour, demands, tantrums and the pain. DD1 is currently having a massive strop because I won't give her glue.

Oh and no massage, physio or whatever as it could make it worse. Just drugs and coping. He seemed hopeful that surgery could bring a quick resolution of the pain issues. I'm not convinced. I do find it frustrating that the level of conversation is always quite basic and I have to start from the beginning with each Dr/Physio and it's explained in simple terms when I've been reading medical research papers and all possible guidance on herniated disc and micro discectomies for a few weeks. He's going to chase the hospital too so I'm not bothering, just carrying on in Limbo, much like most of us here anyway :(

Queen, that's so tough for you. I remember how physically exhausted I used to get when my two were young - they were both highly strung as toddlers, much more laid back now! - & I didn't even have back issues too.

My pharmacist sticks a leaflet in my meds. pack about the dangers of diazepam every buggering time I get it on repeat. I find it a bit irritating - if my GP's not worried (she said the amount I'm using is "peanuts") - I don't get why the pharmacist feels this is necessary.

Are you on the list for surgery, Queen? Sorry, am getting confused about everyone. My leg pain's been so bad this week I'm starting to think more seriously about surgery. The injection has been a resounding failure, to put it mildly, & I can't go on like this indefinitely.

welcome brancaster, I didn't object to the technique.I expressed my general distrust of things I am peddled on the internet by people I have "met" for the first time.that's all. I think most people on here use heat in some form. it doesn't work for me personally. ice works quite well but I don't like the feeling so I don't use itas much as I possibly should. I'm quite keen to address the underlying problem.

Hmmm I think I tried an infrared light once, terrified it was gonna burn me! I find heat only gives relief for a short while, after all it isn't going to stop my herniated disc irritating or compressing my nerves.

I suspect I will be looking at surgery, but still waiting to see the surgeon for the first time. If I start thinking about surgery being definite I will start crying and panicking. The anaesthetic terrifies me, I had it for teeth extractions as a kid - three of them. Fourth was taken out with gas and air (and four adult teeth with the numbing injections for getting my braces). I'd much rather an epidural than a general. Although I will agree to surgery unless the surgeon recommends trying something else first.

Loon - are you on 2mg diazepam? I had to beg for 5mg when it was really bad. I'm not sure it helped but I'll try again. A friend with massive muscle spasms had a huge dose in comparison which did work - prior to surgery.

Yes, Queen, I have 2mg diazepam on repeat. I have had 5mg, too, but actually prefer being able to divide it up into smaller amounts. I did just take 5mg on odd occasions at bedtime, to start with (when I was stiffening up): but read on here I think that it might be better to take 3 x 2mg through the day. I've done that a couple of times this week, & it's helped with the generalized muscle pain / tightness that I've been having. The nerve pain in the leg, not so much.

Did you have ordinary anaesthetics for your teeth extractions? I had 7 or 8 teeth out at about 11 - my dentist didn't believe in braces, so thought he'd sort out my overcrowding that way!- & they used gas as a general. It was utterly terrifying & apparently I fought it all the way! Have had 3 generals since, for ENT operations - by the normal injection in the hand method - & they were honestly absolutely fine. You're very brave having teeth out with gas & air!

Just remembered, my mum used to have huge pots of diazepam when she had prolapsed discs back in the '70s & '80s! Her GP back then used to advise it as the first thing to take, before other pain-killers.

I understand that it can be very addictive, but she never seemed to have any problems stopping taking it when her back was better (& I have to say, the treatment back then of bed rest, muscle relaxants & traction in hospital seemed to help her more than the keeping going, NSAIDs & injection have helped me so far!).

Yes it is easy to get scared about these drugs as they have a well know reputation and some people do get addicted of abuse them. Codeine was worrying but I'm not bothered now I've taken it on and off for so long. I think I have my dad's non addictive genes - he gave up smoking no problem at all. And I found the week or so in bed with the flu really helped last year.

Yep gas in the dentist for the first two and third was an injection. The gas and air was just a baby tooth and may have been accompanied by something else but I was so out of it. It was a little nose mask thing rather than puffing on it when needed like in labour - not that I got to try it in labour. The baby teeth were decayed, between the ages of about 5 and 8 I think.

queen I really feel for you. I've always said no matter how crap my situation is sometimes, at least I don't have little children it must be so hard.

On a practical level, have you talked to your HV? She might be able to suggest some kind of support. HomeStart, student nursery nurse placement etc. if finances could stretch is there any way you could get help over tea time, bath time if DH not home early? I recall that as the worst time of day even when fighting fit. If all else fails can you take a rug to the park and try to rest while they play? Possible too young?

Re anaesthetics, I was like you...scared. I'd had some stinkers as a child. Scary masks, vile smelling gases and vomiting when awake. The good news is they've changed. It was so easy. I chatted to the (very charming anaesthetists) and just drifted away. Woke up without any vomit and didn't notice any real effects other than that of the surgeries. So please don't let that sway your judgements at all.

Sounds like your DH could do with a kick up the bum a bit. Want us to come over and 'explain'?!

denial FT is fucking awesome isn't he? Even my children love him. Not entirely sure that's a good thing given his level of sweatiness (on par with mine when children aren't around ) but I do enjoy hearing them casually singing a song of his except when DS was singing 'give me one fine day of plain sailing weather I can f**k up everything' while he was in the bath the other day oops i thought i skipped that one when he's in the car I can't wait to see him in September, again. You need to listen to some of his older stuff, on Love, Ire & Song for example, Photosynthesis, Thatcher Fucked the Kids, few others that are great, and he does an amazing version of Mr Brightside, Dancing Queen and You Are My Sunshine. Makes my skin tingle. I think it's partly because he's a miserable fucker like me

I hurt. I have taken 4mg diazepam, 30mg codeine and am in bed. again. But I made it through a whole entire week at work. I didn't take higher dose of SR tramadol due to supervision and it didn't happen so a bit fucked off with that, but have had a picnic in the park with my friends. Walked up and down a small hill (ok, it was a big slope, felt like a hill!) That explains it I guess. I opened a bottle of pinot noir. It sort of popped as i opened it, little gas came out and it tastes foul. Gutted as been saving it for a couple of weeks until I really really wanted it. And I really fancied a glass tonight, been looking forward to it all day and decided I would self medicate my locked up muscles with a glass or two.

To the infrared sales people. Fuck off. Sorry for not appearing as polite as the others. I'm not.

loon sorry your leg pain is so bad and the injection has not worked same for you queen, little ones and back pain just don't mix well do they? I struggle enough with my little ones and they are 7 and 4. I can't even begin to describe the guilt I feel at having a bad back, I can't do so much, it affects so much, I get cross when the children keep asking 'why? why not? can't we do xyz?' and yesterday, DS had a meltdown, I could not manage him as my back was so bad, was 5 mins late getting DD from school, walking like a snail to her class, her teacher saw me from afar and let DD run over, DD wailed for everyone to hear 'why were you late?!' 'can you not see DD?' I felt so gutted that I had to explain it to her again. I want to never have to mention it again to them. Sorry, that came out of nowhere.

I need to park in the carpark, they will let me. A school mum who I am friends with has ddd in 4 of her discs, they are dehydrated, rubbing together, but too many to fuse, nothing they can do, she is not mobile at all, she keeps telling me off for not parking there like she does. I saw her today and she leant out the window and shook her head 'what are you doing?!' I feel bad though, as I can walk it, but not when I am late/dealing with DS etc, but that doesn't feel like the right reasons. I don't want special treatment all the time.

tired hot reception ds had a complete wobbly in the park after school Wednesday (usually loves it). I knew I needed to take him home but he wasn't having it so I bribed him with an ice cream on the way home. I can't just pick up the Tantrum sad child and carry him home anymore #throwtheparentingbookoutthewindow

denial but you have to do that though don't you, to cope, make up new rules. I bribe more than I ever thought I would. I give in, especially to DS who is younger and harder to encourage in other ways, more than I used to. I always said I would pick my battles but once they were picked, I would not back down (so, I would say yes to chocolate sometimes, but if I have said no, no amount of tantrums will change my mind, for example) but sometimes, I just bloody well back down. I can't carry, cajole, get down on to their level every time any more when out and about. anything for an easy life these days.

denial you were much nicer to brancaster than I was

re surgery - I agree with matilda it's really straightforward and non scary. I walked into the room with anaesthetist who i already met. I sat on the bed and he said he needed to prepare the canula in my hand, while I sat there upright against the raised bed/pillows. I didn't feel it, as I was too busy answering his question about my favourite cocktail. I didn't finish telling him what made up a perfect manhattan before I found myself waking up in recovery, job done!

So glad to hear you've a pain clinic appointment AND a new chair at work. Wonderful. I hope it's effects (chairs) are an immediate relief/ help and it's just same or better than your one at home
Can't keep up with posts (and see I've missed die interesting interludes). Anyway, for whomever these tidbits suit:
I live by bribery with my DS. Combo. of his AS and my fatigue/ back stuff means I've no patience and bribery works. Thank Gd for Poundland!!!! Lol
Just written up a new target chart the height of two pieces of A4 stuck on top of each other. Includes stuff I've recently confiscated, Poundland goodies and things I wanted to give him anyway. He gets mares and moves up (mostly). Works well (sometimes). Lol

Whoever is worried about addictive nature of painkillers and general anaesthetic - I can totally relate. I was terrified. Called an addiction centre about it who reassured me to go with whatever hospital gave me and I'm now off all of those 'goodies'. I think gear of painkillers makes us keen to get off them ASAP. It will be okay. I promise.
As for g anaesthetic, I relate. All came down to wonderful anaesthetists in the end. My tips. HOLD SOMEONES HAND AT SAME TIME. I was very scared. Very. Wimp. Hugely. Lol
When DH wasn't there (biopsy), I even went beyond embarrassment and asked anaesthatist if I could hold their hand. I did. It was f

Fine. Woke up. Like a time warp. It had all been done. Easy. Then recovery began - and without the fear of the anaesthetic or looming operation.

Hope person worried reads this and realises it's for them ;)

Msdj, I have Fitflops. They're okay. Better than Flat Flops. Lol
What really works wonders for me (and I'm not a vendeuse) is a shoe called MBT
Bloody marvellous
I've just bought myself 3 more pairs. Had to buy (new) from ebay as company gone under. Take pressure off back by forcing me to balance through tummy more. I like the MBT women's trainers and the changa ones. Sizes come up exact (for me). But I usually go for 6.5 or 7 and in an MbT I do best with 6.5 with or without my orthotics in them.

just. Thank you. I have just been looking at the shoes on eBay and two problems for me. They are quite high/thick soled and as I am already nearly six foot. Think they would take me over the six foot mark!! And as with fit flops. They are not very pretty/feminine are they? I couldn't find any that were anyway or maybe that's just the nature of the type of shoe they are

Ok, going to try to post a photo. Never done it before so might fail.

My new Fitflops. Not quite Monalos but I like them.