**Tamoxigang counting down to Easter eggs- thread 48**

[BetsyBoop]

throws some hot cross buns on the trolley

Morning all

Wren I'm sorry you're having a hard time, I hope you all managed to get some sleep.

Bush welcome though sorry you have to be here. It is a great place for support and advice please ask anything. I've just finished 10 months of treatment for breast cancer

Buns hope the time goes quickly till your results

Feline the hair thing is really hard there's no denying it. I bet your wig looks fab though. I've probably said before but lots of people didn't know I was wearing one, some just asked if I'd had a hair cut, I said yes !

Really I'm glad you're getting through the rads and the delays are getting a bit better. Yes I made it, having a great time ! Chilling today and going to visit a volcano tomorrow, once again I'm awake waiting for the others to wake up !

Love to everyone else hope everyone is okish

malteserzz it's good hearing you're having a lovely holiday - very reassuring that a holiday is actually possible in the future. I'm unlikely to go on my summer holiday this year due to still being on chemo (I'm sending DMIL in my place, with DH & DD as holiday was pre-booked) but that doesn't stop me dreaming about future holidays :)

Question on wigs/scarves: where do you get them from and what styles/brands would you recommend?

Apparently my particular chemo cocktail for colon cancer does not necessarily induce hair loss, just a bit of hair thinning, but I already suffer from a bit of hair thinning and loss naturally so I want to be prepared.

Bish. My hospital has it's own wig shop and there are several other outlets across my local area (Manchester) where you can go. You get a voucher from the hospital which can pay for a wig or go part way to paying for it. The ones they offer are from the Dimples Collection and Feather Premier collection. I paid extra for the wig I wanted from the Premier collection and despite my misgivings about the style is light and comfortable to wear. Plus everyone (and I do actually agree with them) say it does look like a wig.

On the head scarf front I've become a bit obsessed!!! I have googled scarf tying which is probably worth doing before you start buying scarves as you can see what style you want to go for and then choose the shape and size of your scarf accordingly.

I got several from Anna Bandana (internet based). Thye do chiffon scarves which are already attached to a soft cotton skull cap. Very comfortable to wearbut limited versatility. I also got some lovely pure cotton head scarves from the India Shop (also on internet). I've been experimenting with styles and have got lots of positive comments.

Bish apart from the wigs you can get on the NHS which get a mixed press, there are a lot of wig shops around - so it depends where you live. There is also a useful website called My New Hair which has a list of hair salons that sell and cut wigs. I bought mine from a salon and had it cut to suit me. No one ever realises it is a wig and people have often commented on how they like my new hair style. It was expensive (I reckoned it cost me a year's worth of hairdressing) but psychologically worth it.
Loads of scarves etc available online. I used Buffs (the tubes) and the cotton equivalents sold by Saltwater as I've never been good with scarves.

Bish - I've used Anna Bandana as well, and also Seasalt's handy bands are really nice light material.

Yes, Seasalt Handybands - not Saltwater!

Oops. Sorry should have said it doesn't look like a wig.

Back from hairdresser now with newly styled wig feeling much more like 'me'. Yay!!!

bish, I also like Suburbanturban for scarves and it's a good website. I also went to a Headstrong session run by the charity breast cancer care at a nearby hospital - london- and found it useful to get a sense of what was available/ what might suit me. I now only wear scarves and more and more enjoy tying my own as I can get the effect I want. I use handybands when i cant be bothered. It's really personal; you may not know what you want to use till/ if you're there.

Although the Headstrong sessions are run by breast cancer care, they are for anyone experiencing hair loss through cancer.

I just used longish scarves, I like tying them big like those worn in some African states! I also used some smaller jersey ones for the gym or for quickness for the school run.

Couldn't get on with my wig which was free on the nhs.

Does anyone knw a charity I could donate it too??

Hi all, reading the scarf/wig discussion with great interest as will be very relevant in a couple of months. What a glorious day today. bish so sorry you have had to rethink your holiday plans, am hoping for a beautiful summer for all of us stay at home ladies to enjoy, but also wishing the very loveliest of holidays for those of you who manage to get away.

Some fantastic scarf/wig suggestions. Thank you. I'm in London so will do some Googling too to see if there are stores I can pop in and try things.

Lovely day today. Usually I'm wiped out in the afternoon so I sent DH and DD to a funfair on Hampstead Heath but I felt okayish (because I'd not eaten; when my colon is in action I feel very tired because of the tumour there) so I drove over there and surprised them :) Came home, ate, and now feel sluggish. I love food so I'm really hoping (as my oncologist believes) that when the chemo starts shrinking my tumours I'll feel normal about eating again. Fingers crossed.

How was your day?

Well, I had a better day, with the symptoms of tax beginning to wear away it seems (I hope). Went to have my PICC line checked at the hospital, which was spookily quiet - they'd shifted my appointment from yesterday, luckily, as everyone had been cramming chemo in before Easter and the waiting queues had been huge, apparently.

My MIL came to lunch. First time I've seen her since my diagnosis (6 months) as my DH has kept her at arm's length. She can be quite complicated to deal with and he finds her visits stressful. But she - and we - were all on our best behaviour and it was good that she came. It's that interesting issue: when your resources are stretched in coping with serious illness, how much do you/ can you invest in looking after other people and their responses to your illness?

Hot cross buns for tea.

Just popping on to wave to everyone, especially BishB

I finished treatment for colon cancer last July. Was it colon cancer you had before as well or something else?

Will your chemo regime be XELOX (oxaliplatin and capecitabine)? If so, hair loss really should be minimal. Mine thinned quite a bit, no bald patches though, and that was considered very unusual, quite possibly because of my ongoing anaemia rather than the chemo, so hopefully you won't need a wig or scarves, but worth having some ideas of what you might like just in case. There were lots of us on chemo day all with full heads of hair, I always felt a bit of a fraud and whenever I told people I was having chemo I'd end up justifying my lack of hair loss

Will you be having surgery after the chemo? I had a pan-proctocolectomy and ileoanal pouch anastomosis (whole colon and rectum removed).

Anyway I shan't ramble on as it's all terribly boring, but if there's anything that I might be able to help with, just give me a shout :)

I hope your first chemo goes well

PS I hope everyone else is doing well too x

Hi RahRah :) My previous cancer was completely unrelated to colon cancer (it was papilliary thyroid cancer that had spread into my lymph system). My treatment for the colon and liver mets will be Avastin & 5FU (Folfox) in a canister that I can have dripping into me at home for 48 hours (in a discreet bum bag apparently so I can walk around/go out with it!). I've been told hair loss is unlikely but I like to be prepared as my hair is naturally prone to thinning. They want to see my liver mets shrink first before they think about liver resection; colon tumour removal comes after that; then more mop-up chemo. Apparently I'm T3 N0 M1.

How are you feeling now?

And do ramble on because it's not boring to me - I don't know anyone with colon cancer...

Just heard, though, that BBC News journalist George Alagiah has been diagnosed...

Yes definitely worth being prepared! I panicked when my hair started falling out, it was the same day every cycle so I'm sure it was partly the chemo and not just the anaemia. It was in little clumps and all over my clothes if I didn't brush it out but then it would calm down for the rest of the cycle.

Capecitabine is really a tablet form of 5FU, it's converted to the active drug in the liver. So I think the side effects are possibly similar. Avastin is a wonder drug, my oncologist was involved in a campaign to get NICE funding for it and I think possibly also in the research for it. Either way he loves it :) he's a horrible person but very good at the scientific side of his job!

I'm feeling better now, generally, but far from having my life back. I will try not to worry you too much as I assume they'll only be removing sections of your bowel? Still a massive upheaval but hopefully it won't cause too many long term issues. I know a few people who have had sections removed and are now completely back to normal :)

I didn't know anyone with bowel cancer either, but met a few in hospital. I was 21 at the time and they were in their sixties and seventies so still felt a bit of the odd one out. This thread was a life saver as somewhere to chat and whinge and just generally see that life goes on after cancer, although you already know that! :) also none of the usual brave fighters beating cancer type stuff that I came across elsewhere!

I was T2 N2 M0, grade 2, stage 3c.

How are you doing at the mo? Any plans for the Easter weekend?

Goodness RahRah, you were so young! I'm was 30 when I had my first brush with cancer and hated being surrounded by so many elderly people on the ward.

Glad you're feeling (relatively) better. Yes, life goes on after cancer but does not necessarily return to normal. One just has to embrace a "new normal" and appreciate each day as it comes.

We usually host a big family Easter each year but I'm not up to that this year so it will be a quiet one.

Hope everyone is enjoying the lovely weather. I've been back in hospital since Tuesday expecting to start chemo the same day. Instead accessing my central line caused septicaemia and kidney problems and there was a debate on whether I needed to be in ITU or transferred to another hospital for renal care. Fortunately antibiotics and continual fluids seem to have helped and my kidneys are functioning. They had to remove my central line. Have had two canulars and now have an unsightly line in my neck. They are hoping to start chemo tomorrow and put a new central line this week. The neck line was put in as an emergency at 1am the other night which was an odd experience (I didn't know it was even planned and they wheeled my bed into theatre and did it without moving me).

Quite fed up as I felt fine until they accessed my line on admission. I then felt instantly really ill. Surprised at how quickly things changed. Means my inpatient stay will be at least 5 weeks (same as last time) and may well be longer.

Wren I find I don't have much time to deal with those who require a lot of my energy in dealing with what they think of my illness. Ime the people who care don't drain your energy.

Wigs? I used Rene Amore wigs. For me, they were brilliant. Very comfy once I got use to the feeling, lots of compliments on the new conditioner I must be using for my hair. Went to a specialist wig seller for chemo who wanted to see pics of me beforehand and got in the exact one she knew would suit. That was worthwhile.

Oh difficult, what a frustrating experience! Big (((( hugs)))) to you.

pickle what a nightmare, it's amazing how quickly you can feel ill isn't it! I hope you soon feel better and that chemo can get started tomorrow. I think you're local to me, are you by any chance in a unit beginning with E? (You don't have to say if you don't want to!) if you are though, there's supposedly some alternative therapies available for cancer patients, I'm not sure what they entail or whether they'd be suitable. I haven't had personal experience but everyone I met at my support group raved about the lady. I had my surgery at that hospital but chemo elsewhere so never visited the unit. If you are local to me and might be interested in the support group when you're feeling better I can PM you the details, it's in town beginning with W.

Sorry that was a bit rambly but I hope you feel better soon

Bish I hope you enjoy your quiet Easter :) do you have children? Agree about new normal, I've always been of the appreciate every day frame of mind which definitely helps. Although sometimes now feel the need to appreciate days even more,

wren I've given up on a few people who made it all about them but tried to have some patience with people who genuinely mean well, I think lots of people my age have no idea to handle illnesses. Also I didn't have any emotional reaction to my diagnosis whereas my family did, so at first they needed reassurance and lots of emotional support, but they "paid back" with all the physical support after surgery and during chemo. But definitely don't waste much energy on people who give nothing back, sounds like it's worth keeping MIL at arm's length, especially if your DH isn't keen. I hope you enjoyed your hot cross buns.

Blimey, pickle, more rubbish hospital experiences to add to your slate. Really really glad that you're picking up again and that chemo can start tomorrow. Sorry about the five weeks - out in time for half term?

Thanks pickle and rahrah for thoughts on those friends/ relatives who take a lot of looking after...